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Post by krc11 on Feb 19, 2015 21:01:18 GMT
I haven't ever donated to one. I find that most of them are not things I really feel the need to support. We had a family in our town involved in a car crash that set one up. Normally I might have had more sympathy, but they had children insufficiently restrained and the one daughter who was the most hurt was hurt (she mangled her foot) while trying to protect one of the insufficiently restrained preschoolers. They were hit by an uninsured driver but they didn't have full coverage on their main family vehicle. Who does that?  There was bad decision making going all around and their over dramatic reaction to the whole thing. It's hard to describe, but the tone of their posts about it (that went on for months while the foot healed) were overwrought. They bumped the GFA daily and had other family members doing the same thing. It really turned me off helping them, especially when a little foresight with their insurance would have saved them all the financial hardship they were complaining about. I know what you mean. I received one GFM from the DD of a woman I know. She has some disease and the treatment she wants to undergo is not covered by Medicare or Medicaid, whatever she's on, yada yada. This is the same girl who doesn't keep a steady job (not because she can't), rides a motorcycle recklessly (and has had accidents with no insurance), engages in other risky behavior, and lets her parents fund most of her mishaps rather than take responsibility for her own adult self. I know it's harsh, but I keep thinking if she stayed at a job, maybe she'd have insurance that covered it. It's her whole mentality that someone else should pay for her and she gets to dictate what she wants to do - whether it's state assistance, assistance from her parents or else. And now she wants me to pay for her. I would be more likely to give her mother money, than put money in an account where this girl would probably go buy a burger or something and still have state pay for medical treatment. No one plans to get sick but sometimes, you could have made some choices that minimizes your risks. |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 19, 2015 21:10:44 GMT
My cousin started one a week ago. They have raised $25 in one week. It didn't come from me. You can't put that out there and not tell us what they are raising funds for!  I'm guessing with donations of just $25 it isn't for a life or death matter. [ Actually it is. But they have tapped out all of their family. |
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Post by tuva42 on Feb 19, 2015 21:19:49 GMT
There is one similar to Go Fund Me that I like. It's called DonorsChoose.org and its a place where teachers can post their needs for their classrooms and you can donate to help them get supplies the school system can't fund. The actual costs of each item are checked out by the DonorsChoose people so you know the costs are legit. I've helped a friend's daughter fit out her classroom with some things they needed for her special needs kids. The kids then send you little handwritten notes and you get e-mails about the classes progress.
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Post by PEArfect on Feb 19, 2015 21:20:58 GMT
After my husband passed away his high school classmates started a Go Fund Me account for me and my daughters. I had no idea, and honestly I was a little embarrassed seeing them repeatedly 'bump' it on Facebook. It was only up for maybe two weeks. I appreciate that they were thinking of me and my daughters though, so very thoughtful and kind. They have done a lot for us. Don't quote me, but I think the classmate that started it said that they take $.05/dollar. I believe you also have to claim it on your taxes, which she said she would take care of for me since it was in her name. I don't understand what there is to claim on your taxes? I would think all the contributions would be considered gifts, right? I honestly don't know since I didn't set it up. I just remember her mentioning something about claiming it on her taxes so I wouldn't be bothered with it. She wrote me a check for the amount, so it was all in her name and she 'gifted' me the money. I just did a search and found this..."If you are asking for funds, that is NOT a gift. It's self-employment income." |
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Post by jenjie on Feb 19, 2015 21:27:50 GMT
My mom made the mistake of recommending we set up a Go Fund Me acct to help with expenses. Dh was offended at the suggestion and mom's feelings were hurt because she was trying to help. We've all moved past it but it made for an uncomfortable evening. Lexica I'm so sorry your ds is acting this at toward you! I hope he gets over himself very soon. |
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J u l e e
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Post by J u l e e on Feb 19, 2015 21:35:02 GMT
Lexica, that is awful! I'm sorry that happened with your son!
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Post by Lexica on Feb 19, 2015 21:40:20 GMT
nope, and I never would. Like previous posters, I would find a more direct way to donate to someone or some cause. I think people set up those kinds of sites for stuff that's not really necessary, or before we know the whole story... ...like the guy who walked 21 miles to/from work for years, ended up getting hundreds of thousands of dollars through a gofundme account that someone else set up for him- he had YEARS to save up money to buy a used car, a bicycle, etc. but he didn't, and now strangers are suddenly feeling generous enough to give him money. ...?? really ?? I think (in most cases, not all) these kinds of sites are mostly a symptom of 'slacktivism' ...something that makes people feel like they're 'helping someone' or 'helping a cause' without actually having to 'do' anything substantive. That one didn't bother me at all. The guy's car broke down ten years ago and he only makes $!0.55 an hour, currently. He's 56 years old and never asked anyone to do that for him. I can certainly see how he couldn't afford to save up for a car, pay insurance, and gas on that salary. And I'm sure he earned even less 10 years ago when his car originally broke down. To me, that's just someone else wanting to do a nice thing for someone and inviting strangers to participate if they want to. Had the man himself put up the request, it would have bugged me. But the fact that he just quietly walked without complaining, in Detroit's nasty weather, getting home at 4 am in the morning only to turn around and leave the house at 8 am to make it to work the next day. I didn't see it while it was active, but I don't have any problem with people being kind to other people through the site. It is the Greedy Gerties that put up their own request under a fake name with false or exaggerated stories that bother me. |
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smartypants71
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Post by smartypants71 on Feb 19, 2015 21:51:08 GMT
I wanted to add one more thing here -
I'm also hesitant because I'm not sure the money goes where they say it's going. There was a local musician who passed away a couple of months ago. He was very well known, and it was apparent that he did not set aside funds for his funeral. The day after he died, a GFM link started popping up all over my FB feed. The feed was started by some random (to me) person. It turns out, she was not designated by the family to even do this, so no one knows if she actually was going to use the money for what she was collecting for.
Does anyone know if there are controls in place to verify that the money is being used for what "they" say it is being used for? How do we know this isn't a fund for someone to have a holiday in Mexico?
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Post by brina on Feb 19, 2015 21:53:36 GMT
like bridal/baby showers - I think you should never start one for yourself or an immediate family member.
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Post by disneypal on Feb 19, 2015 21:54:22 GMT
I have never started one and have never donated to one. But...if it was someone I knew personally, I might be inclined to donate.
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Post by Bitchy Rich on Feb 19, 2015 22:11:27 GMT
I don't understand what there is to claim on your taxes? I would think all the contributions would be considered gifts, right? I honestly don't know since I didn't set it up. I just remember her mentioning something about claiming it on her taxes so I wouldn't be bothered with it. She wrote me a check for the amount, so it was all in her name and she 'gifted' me the money. I just did a search and found this..."If you are asking for funds, that is NOT a gift. It's self-employment income." If you are offering products or services in exchange for money, that's generally considered self-employed income. But if you are asking people to give you cash out of the goodness of their hearts due to some tragic event in your life, those are just gifts. |
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Feb 19, 2015 22:13:41 GMT
nope, and I never would. Like previous posters, I would find a more direct way to donate to someone or some cause. I think people set up those kinds of sites for stuff that's not really necessary, or before we know the whole story... ...like the guy who walked 21 miles to/from work for years, ended up getting hundreds of thousands of dollars through a gofundme account that someone else set up for him- he had YEARS to save up money to buy a used car, a bicycle, etc. but he didn't, and now strangers are suddenly feeling generous enough to give him money. ...?? really ?? I think (in most cases, not all) these kinds of sites are mostly a symptom of 'slacktivism' ...something that makes people feel like they're 'helping someone' or 'helping a cause' without actually having to 'do' anything substantive. That one didn't bother me at all. The guy's car broke down ten years ago and he only makes $10.55 an hour, currently. He's 56 years old and never asked anyone to do that for him. I can certainly see how he couldn't afford to save up for a car, pay insurance, and gas on that salary. And I'm sure he earned even less 10 years ago when his car originally broke down. To me, that's just someone else wanting to do a nice thing for someone and inviting strangers to participate if they want to. Had the man himself put up the request, it would have bugged me. But the fact that he just quietly walked without complaining, in Detroit's nasty weather, getting home at 4 am in the morning only to turn around and leave the house at 8 am to make it to work the next day. I didn't see it while it was active, but I don't have any problem with people being kind to other people through the site. It is the Greedy Gerties that put up their own request under a fake name with false or exaggerated stories that bother me. oh, I agree with the people who put up their own request, or the ones that are for something I personally would deem non-essential-- but like this particular story, now whoever raised the money for the guy raised so much that he was forced to move over threats to his life. Not exactly the effect the donors were intending, I don't think. |
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Post by momstime on Feb 19, 2015 22:15:41 GMT
I've only been asked to donate once. It was a guy who wanted to keep his son in private school after he, himself, quit his job because he just wasn't enjoying anymore. Umm, no.
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anniebygaslight
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Post by anniebygaslight on Feb 19, 2015 22:17:09 GMT
No and no.
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Post by Lexica on Feb 19, 2015 22:30:07 GMT
That one didn't bother me at all. The guy's car broke down ten years ago and he only makes $10.55 an hour, currently. He's 56 years old and never asked anyone to do that for him. I can certainly see how he couldn't afford to save up for a car, pay insurance, and gas on that salary. And I'm sure he earned even less 10 years ago when his car originally broke down. To me, that's just someone else wanting to do a nice thing for someone and inviting strangers to participate if they want to. Had the man himself put up the request, it would have bugged me. But the fact that he just quietly walked without complaining, in Detroit's nasty weather, getting home at 4 am in the morning only to turn around and leave the house at 8 am to make it to work the next day. I didn't see it while it was active, but I don't have any problem with people being kind to other people through the site. It is the Greedy Gerties that put up their own request under a fake name with false or exaggerated stories that bother me. oh, I agree with the people who put up their own request, or the ones that are for something I personally would deem non-essential-- but like this particular story, now whoever raised the money for the guy raised so much that he was forced to move over threats to his life. Not exactly the effect the donors were intending, I don't think. Oh no! I hadn't heard that at all! He's a target just because he started something nice for someone else? I've got to go see if I can find anything on that. That's just wrong. |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 19, 2015 22:35:29 GMT
I've contributed to a kickstarter project (Michigan Beer Film) but I don't think I've done GFM. I admit I thought about trying to raise a little bit towards IVF treatment. Not the whole thing, just enough to get it started, but realized that a lot of people may view that as selfish and not necessary. Plus my circle/network just isn't big enough to make a difference.
I have donated to my kids' band teacher online fundraiser through donorschoose.org. It's a site that is all education related. You can do a search for projects in your area. At least this way, you know the money you donate is being used for the classroom. Most of the projects have a breakdown of the costs so you can see what they plan to buy. The next time she has a fundraiser for the band, I plan on donating.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 19, 2015 22:38:02 GMT
like bridal/baby showers - I think you should never start one for yourself or an immediate family member. I disagree. I donated to one for two children. Their father killed their mother and then himself. Their aunt (guardian) set it up. I have no issue at all. They will need help for years to come. I donate if I want and if not I move on. Judging is a waste of energy. |
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Feb 19, 2015 22:37:59 GMT
Lexica: No, the guy all the donated money was for; the guy who walked the 21 miles round trip every day. He now fears for his safety and has moved out of his house (well, his girlfriend's house). the story
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Post by Deleted on Feb 19, 2015 22:41:18 GMT
Lexica: No, the guy all the donated money was for; the guy who walked the 21 miles round trip every day. He now fears for his safety and has moved out of his house (well, his girlfriend's house). the story Stories like this make me sad to be from MI. |
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Post by penny on Feb 19, 2015 22:54:27 GMT
Yes, I have donated. There was a young guy that I saw during the ALS ice water challenge that was caring for his mom who was pretty advanced with the disease. He had also been diagnosed with it and was not going to be able to support himself much longer. His friends put the GoFundMe up to try to make the remainder of his life as stress free as possible. I felt very strongly about that one and donated. I couldn't do the challenge to raise money for research, so giving a bit to one person suffering was the next best thing. My son is currently not speaking to me because he asked me to bring his GoFundMe here to share with the peas on this site and I refused. He was starting up a new business and somehow thought using GoFundMe to beg for money was the way to get the money to do that. I'm quite old school, and I think if he had a good solid business plan, he should work toward saving the money needed to get started, present his business plan to family members to solicit investors, or apply for a small business loan through a lending institution. The exception to that, for me anyway, is if the end result is a tangible product that can be given to the donor/investors as outlined in the original funding proposal. Something to be given to them in exchange for them helping you fund getting tooled up for manufacturing the item. Like the butter knife I helped support in exchange for receiving one next month. And that is only to be done after all the R&D is completed and you have a viable working product in one hand and a great business plan in the other. So because I refused to post his GoFundMe here, he got mad and said some horribly mean, nasty things to me and told me not to bother talking to him again because nothing I could say would change his mind about me. Okay then. Now I'm persona non grata in his eyes and I haven't heard from him in 6 months. Hey, anyone want to start a GoFundMe to raise money to enable me to buy some wine to help me deal and drown my sorrows?  There are crowdfunding sites that deal specifically with startup and small business capital... He might have more luck with one of those... You know, if you want to tell him when he talks to you |
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Post by penny on Feb 19, 2015 22:57:30 GMT
I wanted to add one more thing here - I'm also hesitant because I'm not sure the money goes where they say it's going. There was a local musician who passed away a couple of months ago. He was very well known, and it was apparent that he did not set aside funds for his funeral. The day after he died, a GFM link started popping up all over my FB feed. The feed was started by some random (to me) person. It turns out, she was not designated by the family to even do this, so no one knows if she actually was going to use the money for what she was collecting for. Does anyone know if there are controls in place to verify that the money is being used for what "they" say it is being used for? How do we know this isn't a fund for someone to have a holiday in Mexico? Each site will have its own legal... So the agreement on GFM won't be the same as with iPledg or with Kickstarter for example... |
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Post by pjaye on Feb 19, 2015 23:07:19 GMT
I would never set one up for myself.
I have donated to one, despite swearing black and blue that I would never donate to anyone on the internet...I did!
It was for someone on 2 Peas who rescued two Great Dane dogs (they were originally rescued by a shelter and then she adopted them to continue their care), one was very malnourished and couldn't walk and the shelter set up a go fund me type account to buy a wheelie frame for him so he could stand up, as his back legs were affected.
There were several people from 2 Peas who donated and they were able to get his wheels within a couple of days. When he passed away the wheelie frame went back to the shelter to be used for other dogs.
So I did break my "no donations to people on the internet" rule, but this one was definitely worth it.
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Post by rainangel on Feb 19, 2015 23:07:55 GMT
That one didn't bother me at all. The guy's car broke down ten years ago and he only makes $10.55 an hour, currently. He's 56 years old and never asked anyone to do that for him. I can certainly see how he couldn't afford to save up for a car, pay insurance, and gas on that salary. And I'm sure he earned even less 10 years ago when his car originally broke down. To me, that's just someone else wanting to do a nice thing for someone and inviting strangers to participate if they want to. Had the man himself put up the request, it would have bugged me. But the fact that he just quietly walked without complaining, in Detroit's nasty weather, getting home at 4 am in the morning only to turn around and leave the house at 8 am to make it to work the next day. I didn't see it while it was active, but I don't have any problem with people being kind to other people through the site. It is the Greedy Gerties that put up their own request under a fake name with false or exaggerated stories that bother me. oh, I agree with the people who put up their own request, or the ones that are for something I personally would deem non-essential-- but like this particular story, now whoever raised the money for the guy raised so much that he was forced to move over threats to his life. Not exactly the effect the donors were intending, I don't think. I was just reading the update on this, and it is rather sad. Apparantly he hasn't even received any money yet, but is already getting threats on his life. We shouldn't be surprised though, there are more than one story about lottery winners being killed aswell. It's like people think ' Well, they didn't have this money yesterday so I'm just going to steal it. Might even kill them if they refuse to hand it over at gunpoint LOL' People suck... |
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Post by johna on Feb 19, 2015 23:24:27 GMT
I had no idea how much was taken out, either. I contributed to one for funeral costs of some children that died in a fire in a local community and then also for medical costs for some friends who live in another state.
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kelly8875
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Post by kelly8875 on Feb 19, 2015 23:49:54 GMT
I've donated to one, once. A high school friend of mine is trying to send her son on a once in a lifetime exchange student trip to China. There is no way they can afford to do it without asking for help, and I felt like since it was for education and life experience, it was worth my few bucks. Some of the other reasons I hear of are just dumb. Save the money yourself! I understand the thinking about education/life experience. However, why can't the kid get out and do odd jobs to earn the money, rather than mom asking for donations? If I was approached for a donation like this (and I have been) I would decline. If the student comes around and wants to earn the money, then I've got a whole list of things I would gladly pay them to do. The experience is going to mean much more to them if they have done something to earn it. In this case, the family doesn't live near me at all. And, for whatever reason, they only had 2 months notice on this school trip. Something happened with the organization of the trip, and no one thought they were going, then bam...they can go. I also know that this kid is working hard to raise the money, and still would have been short the funds. |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 20, 2015 1:01:40 GMT
I haven't donated to one until just a few weeks ago. A local farm family lost their barn to fire. In the fire was equipment like tractors, a truck, and other things of value. They also lost some livestock. This is a young family trying to make a living the hard way and unfortunately found they were under insured. So I donated $50. Not a lot but I felt the desire to do something.
I doubt I would ever start one myself but I'm a big believer in never say never.
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Post by gmcwife1 on Feb 20, 2015 1:30:45 GMT
My son is currently not speaking to me because he asked me to bring his GoFundMe here to share with the peas on this site and I refused. He was starting up a new business and somehow thought using GoFundMe to beg for money was the way to get the money to do that. I'm quite old school, and I think if he had a good solid business plan, he should work toward saving the money needed to get started, present his business plan to family members to solicit investors, or apply for a small business loan through a lending institution. The exception to that, for me anyway, is if the end result is a tangible product that can be given to the donor/investors as outlined in the original funding proposal. Something to be given to them in exchange for them helping you fund getting tooled up for manufacturing the item. Like the butter knife I helped support in exchange for receiving one next month. And that is only to be done after all the R&D is completed and you have a viable working product in one hand and a great business plan in the other. So because I refused to post his GoFundMe here, he got mad and said some horribly mean, nasty things to me and told me not to bother talking to him again because nothing I could say would change his mind about me. Okay then. Now I'm persona non grata in his eyes and I haven't heard from him in 6 months. Hey, anyone want to start a GoFundMe to raise money to enable me to buy some wine to help me deal and drown my sorrows? I'm sorry your son is being a brat and treating you like this  |
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Post by montanacowgirl on Feb 20, 2015 1:32:38 GMT
I've donated to one, it was for a young veteran father, who was losing his home, after his second kidney replacement.
I've seen all sorts on my feed but prefer to give to other charities.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 20, 2015 2:14:39 GMT
Hey, anyone want to start a GoFundMe to raise money to enable me to buy some wine to help me deal and drown my sorrows? I'll paypal you enough to get a bottle LOL. |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 20, 2015 4:54:14 GMT
Lexica: No, the guy all the donated money was for; the guy who walked the 21 miles round trip every day. He now fears for his safety and has moved out of his house (well, his girlfriend's house). the story And yet the linked article about the guy's concern for his own safety gives the name of the company where he works. Nice reporting! I suspect he's going to have to get a job somewhere else now. |
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There was bad decision making going all around and their over dramatic reaction to the whole thing. It's hard to describe, but the tone of their posts about it (that went on for months while the foot healed) were overwrought. They bumped the GFA daily and had other family members doing the same thing. It really turned me off helping them, especially when a little foresight with their insurance would have saved them all the financial hardship they were complaining about. 
I'm guessing with donations of just $25 it isn't for a life or death matter.
