sunnyday
Junior Member
Posts: 72
Jul 3, 2014 15:49:59 GMT
|
Post by sunnyday on May 17, 2016 12:48:03 GMT
It has been quite a while since I posted, but I know how you guys like updates so better later than never, right? Here is the original thread: 2peasrefugees.boards.net/thread/14138/diagnosed-stage-colon-cancer-update?page=1&scrollTo=347116This past year and a half has been unreal in many ways. Dave's treatment goals from the beginning were to prolong his life and give him a better quality of life. A cure was/is not on the table. We went through a number of chemos, discontinuing each when they either stopped working or the side effects were no longer bearable (either life threatening, or debilitating). We are getting closer to the end of the road now. There are not any good chemo options left. Dave is so glad that he decided to do the chemo. He has been able to accomplish so many things this past year and a half, stuff that he would never have been able to do. When he was feeling well, we took two trips, one to the Grand Canyon and the other to see the Sequoia trees. He has self-published a free book of his poetry, written a funny short story about growing up Catholic, and written a number of songs. His wish has been to share his creativity with others, so I was thinking of sharing some of his poetry on this board over the next few weeks. Before he got sick, I used to read posts with him and we'd have fun talking about what was happening with "the peas." He would love to hear some responses from "the peas" about his poems if you'd like to share them. Thank you all for your encouragement when he was first diagnosed. You will never know how important your input was to us! Here is the first one that I want to share. He wrote it shortly after diagnosis: A Conversation with Death by David A. Smith
Where were you when I was young back when my life had just begun? I was there as time unfurled while you spinned and laughed at the world. In later youth I knew of you who made me sad and frightened too. Because by nature you are Life with whom I struggle with much strife. I’ve seen the suffering you bring because of this, to Life I cling. And Life’s not filled with pain throughout? Your bias makes me want to shout! But we have love and joy and peace and all you do is make them cease. It’s I who brings the rest in peace On pain and suffering Life does feast. You bring eternal flames to most! And “rest in peace” is what you boast? A lie and slander meant to scare! Don’t let it trap you in its snare. It’s you that scares, you’ve come too close! and set cancer at your post! Those cells are Life consuming you! You dare to blame that on me too? Nonetheless it is your friend it takes me to my very end. You need me Life, why can’t you see? The brush fire always brings new trees.
Yes on that point I can concede, but nothingness is stark to me. I want to laugh and love and live. Let me stay, I’ve much to give! Be calm my child, don’t let fear reign I will release you from your pain.
|
|
|
Post by mikklynn on May 17, 2016 12:56:52 GMT
Beautiful poem. I especially like these lines: You need me Life, why can’t you see? The brush fire always brings new trees.
I am so sorry for what you are going through. I understand. My DH has been battling metastatic renal cancer for 9 years. We never, ever thought he'd make it this far. We hoped for two years.
Feel free to PM me if you want to talk privately.
You and Dave are in my prayers.
|
|
tincin
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,378
Jul 25, 2014 4:55:32 GMT
|
Post by tincin on May 17, 2016 12:57:34 GMT
I am not a huge poetry fan so I don't know anything about the correct form or what not. That being said, your DH's poem spoke to me. It brought tears to my eyes as I thought of my family and friends who are no longer here to share my life. Please thank him for me. I wish you both peace as he continues his journey.
|
|
valincal
Drama Llama
Southern Alberta
Posts: 5,760
Jun 27, 2014 2:21:22 GMT
|
Post by valincal on May 17, 2016 12:59:40 GMT
Thank you so much for sharing Dave's story with us. You're a strong and amazing woman. My thoughts are with your family. Take care.
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Sept 20, 2024 22:13:43 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on May 17, 2016 13:03:45 GMT
I lost my dad in February to a terminal illness. I'll never forget how he told me over the years as I faced the loss of other family or friends that death is a part of life. When I stood beside his casket, I heard his voice whispering those words to me. Death is a part of life.
Dave's poem echoes that same truth. Thank you for sharing with us, and please continue to do so. You and Dave will be in my prayers.
|
|
|
Post by craftsbycarolyn on May 17, 2016 13:07:44 GMT
Thank you for sharing. The poem is beautiful!
I wish you calm and peace as your journey continues.
|
|
|
Post by mommy2sandb on May 17, 2016 13:10:40 GMT
I am so sorry for what you and Dave have and are going through.
I have to say though that that was one of the most beautiful poems I have ever read and it brought me to tears.
Thank you so much for sharing.
|
|
scrappert
Prolific Pea
RefuPea #2956
Posts: 7,949
Location: Milwaukee, WI area
Jul 11, 2014 21:20:09 GMT
|
Post by scrappert on May 17, 2016 13:21:14 GMT
Thank you for allowing us to read some of his writings. This poem is beautiful, as one who has lost many family members to cancer, this speaks to me.
|
|
valleyview
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,816
Jun 27, 2014 18:41:26 GMT
|
Post by valleyview on May 17, 2016 13:23:06 GMT
Thank you for sharing Dave's story and poem. He's correct about life and death, I think. Hugs to you both.
|
|
janeinbama
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,200
Location: Alabama
Jan 29, 2015 16:24:49 GMT
|
Post by janeinbama on May 17, 2016 13:31:02 GMT
Love the poem. Death is something that happens to all of us and I hope that when my time comes I can face the future with quiet peace and acceptance. Dave is setting a wonderful example of this. God bless you all.
|
|
brandy327
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,353
Jun 26, 2014 16:09:34 GMT
|
Post by brandy327 on May 17, 2016 13:32:21 GMT
Very touching poem. Thank you and Dave for sharing it.
Your original post hit a chord with me because when I was in my early 20s, my dad was diagnosed with Stage 3 colon cancer. Unfortunately, his treatment wasn't successful. He passed away within 9 months.
My thoughts and prayers continue for both of you and that treatment continues to give Dave extra time here with you and your family.
|
|
|
Post by LavenderLayoutLady on May 17, 2016 14:52:15 GMT
Thank you for sharing. Dave has quite a way with words, and his poem is beautiful.
(((Hugs))) to you both.
|
|
M in Carolina
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,128
Jun 29, 2014 12:11:41 GMT
|
Post by M in Carolina on May 17, 2016 15:03:23 GMT
I'm so sorry that your husband didn't respond better to his treatment. My dh's uncle has stage 4 colon cancer. He's been palliative for the past 4 years. Nobody thought he'd last anywhere near this long, but he has. He only needed hospice care for the past year.
I loved your dh's poem. I have studied poetry, and I thought it was very well done and erudite. The theme of talking to death and death answering is a powerful one and is uncommon in poetry written by novices. I'd love to read more.
I will be praying for you and your husband. I hope he has many wonderful days just enjoying your family, good food, etc.
I can't do much because of my MS, so I subscribe to Netflix, Hulu (which just updated many of their programs with all seasons, not just the most recent), and Amazon Prime (there are add on subscriptions like Starz and Acorn, which is British TV). I also get Texture, a digital magazine subscription service with over 100 magazines available. I stay really busy with all these distractions.
|
|
|
Post by jenjie on May 17, 2016 15:04:55 GMT
My husband was given a similar prognosis not long after you and your husband started this frightening journey. He's been gone almost 11 months now. I tell you this so you understand why I say I am so so glad you and your Dave have had one and a half good years together, taking trips, making memories, creating songs and poetry, making the most of your time together. I hope you do share more of Dave's poetry with us.
Praying for you both. My heart is with you as you begin to transition to goodbye. Please reach out to me in the coming months if you need to talk to someone who understands.
|
|
|
Post by miominmio on May 17, 2016 15:06:24 GMT
A wonderful poem. I hope it is okay that I write it down?
I wish Dave peace on the remainder of his journey.
|
|
|
Post by pb on May 17, 2016 15:24:58 GMT
Thank you for sharing. The poem really spoke to me as my father has been given a "use by date". He is wildly vacillating between deep depression and absolute fantasy. Acceptance is so hard
I look forward to more poems.
You and your family will be in my thoughts.
|
|
RosieKat
Drama Llama
PeaJect #12
Posts: 5,535
Jun 25, 2014 19:28:04 GMT
|
Post by RosieKat on May 17, 2016 15:27:54 GMT
It sounds like in so many ways he's lived more in this year and a half than many people do in 80+ years.
His poem just simply rings true. I can't yet relate to all of it, but there is much that I get. As far as sharing his creativity with the world, I'd love it if he does.
Joy to you both in the good times, and peace in the hard times.
|
|
|
Post by auntkelly on May 17, 2016 15:28:40 GMT
Thank you for the update. It sounds like your husband is an amazing person.
My husband is a colon cancer survivor.
I will keep you and your husband in my prayers.
|
|
|
Post by whopea on May 17, 2016 15:37:32 GMT
Peace to both of you. Your family will be in my prayers.
|
|
|
Post by ilikepink on May 17, 2016 16:14:09 GMT
Thank you for sharing that wonderful poem! I'm so sorry that you and your DH have to go through this, but it something we all face. You are blessed that you have had time to make some wonderful memories. My thoughts and prayers are with you both as you continue on the journey.
Hugs
|
|
|
Post by KelleeM on May 17, 2016 16:19:42 GMT
Thanks to you and Dave for sharing his poem. I'm glad you're had this time together.
|
|
sunnyday
Junior Member
Posts: 72
Jul 3, 2014 15:49:59 GMT
|
Post by sunnyday on May 17, 2016 16:52:25 GMT
Thanks so much to all of you who have responded thus far! Your words are very comforting.
I'm glad that you would like to read more. I have a few in mind that I will share over the next few days.
Dave went on disability at the beginning of February and that really took a load off for him. His job was very demanding and, even though he was able to work from home, it was very stressful still.
He never used to share his music or poems, but this diagnosis has really brought him out of his shell. He decided to start sharing them online recently, so I'm really glad that I can share them with you all.
I read your responses to him and he was very touched by everything you all said. Thank you.
miominnio: Please write it down and share it with whomever you would like. I just ask that you give attribution to David A. Smith. jenjie: I stopped coming here on a regular basis after the diagnosis so I didn't know about your DH. I'm so sorry for your loss and that it happened so quickly. Dave and I certainly do treasure the fact that we have been given some extra time. Peace to you. MinCarolina: Thank you for your comments. I love to hear from people who study poetry. Dave has some that are filled with metaphor, I think you will like those a lot.
|
|
|
Post by camanddanismom on May 17, 2016 22:48:45 GMT
What a talented man you have! It is a privilege to read his work!
I love that you are using the time you have together to its fullest and that he is sharing his talents.
I am sorry he is sick and that the two of you are in this situation at all. You are both facing it with such love and Grace.
You will be in my prayers and I look forward to more of David's writings.
|
|
TankTop
Pearl Clutcher
Refupea #1,871
Posts: 4,823
Location: On the couch...
Jun 28, 2014 1:52:46 GMT
|
Post by TankTop on May 17, 2016 23:10:04 GMT
Thank you for sharing. I love the way he so effectively conveyed two voices.
|
|
|
Post by hop2 on May 18, 2016 0:43:58 GMT
I'm am sorry you and ge are dealing with this.
That is a beautiful poem. He's very talented I'm honored he chose to share his talent with us. I look forward to reading more.
|
|
MissChris
Full Member
Posts: 370
Jul 14, 2014 0:46:04 GMT
|
Post by MissChris on May 18, 2016 1:50:14 GMT
I don't post very much, but I read just about everything and instantly remembered your original post. I have been keeping you and your family in my prayers and thank you for giving us your update. I read your husband's poem at my desk at work and soon the tears were streaming down my face. His words were very touching and thought provoking. Please let him know that he has a true talent and I feel honored that the two of you shared this talent with us. Continued prayers going out your way.
|
|
GiantsFan
Prolific Pea
Posts: 8,448
Site Supporter
Jun 27, 2014 14:44:56 GMT
|
Post by GiantsFan on May 18, 2016 1:54:08 GMT
What a beautiful poem. Thank you for sharing. I'm sorry you both are going though this. Cancer sucks!
|
|
|
Post by internetmama on May 18, 2016 2:08:53 GMT
Hi Dave, thanks for sharing your poem. Do you read William Blake? I think you would really enjoy Songs of Innocence and Experience. Your piece is very powerful. Best wishes for the days ahead.
|
|
FurryP
Drama Llama
To pea or not to pea...
Posts: 7,188
Site Supporter
Jun 26, 2014 19:58:26 GMT
|
Post by FurryP on May 18, 2016 2:31:14 GMT
The poem is beautiful I'm so glad you and Dave have enjoyed more time together, and that he has been able to do so much!
|
|
|
Post by berty on May 18, 2016 2:47:57 GMT
Thanks to you and your husband for sharing such a lovely and thought provoking piece of work.
|
|