Sarah*H
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,984 
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Post by Sarah*H on Jun 25, 2016 2:58:42 GMT
DH & I will be gone for 12+ hours tomorrow. I thought it was too long to leave 15 yo DS alone so made arrangements for him to go with my parents. DH thinks that is nonsense and we should just let him stay home. I'm going to leave it up to DS (I think he'll choose to go to my parents' house if they have yard work that needs to be done) but it made me wonder what is the norm in these in between years.
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Post by jeremysgirl on Jun 25, 2016 3:01:04 GMT
I have a 16 year old and a 14.5 year old and I would leave them 12 hours as long as they had someone to call in case of emergency if I was going to be far away.
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Post by mom on Jun 25, 2016 3:02:15 GMT
I have a 15 and 17 year old sons.
I would leave my 15 home alone that long, but only if my dad was going to be around if there was a problem. My son is pretty predictable in what he would do (play video games, Netflix and sleep). If no one was going to be close, then I would make him go somewhere. FWIW, my dad lives 2 miles away - so close.
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Post by 950nancy on Jun 25, 2016 3:06:27 GMT
We left our boys alone during the day for a long time. They were fine. The first time my son was alone in the house overnight… he was 21.
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Post by ntsf on Jun 25, 2016 3:07:25 GMT
depends on the kid..but at 15 I could stay alone for several days. my kids were left alone that long at that age. I didn't worry. we always had backup neighbors and friends.
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brandy327
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,353
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Post by brandy327 on Jun 25, 2016 3:08:05 GMT
I have a 16 year old and a 14.5 year old and I would leave them 12 hours as long as they had someone to call in case of emergency if I was going to be far away.  |
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johnnysmom
Drama Llama
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Jun 25, 2014 21:16:33 GMT
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Post by johnnysmom on Jun 25, 2016 3:09:35 GMT
Ds will be 15 in about an hour. I would leave it up to him but I'd try had to find somewhere for him to go for at least a few hours. We live in the center of a small rural town so he can walk to several friends houses if arrangements were made. He'd probably just sleep and play video games but I'd feel better if he actually some a real person at some point.
Fwiw I'd be willing to bet dh wouldn't be ok with it. He tends to be more overprotective than I am.
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Post by myshelly on Jun 25, 2016 3:09:44 GMT
At 15 I was babysitting other people's babies overnight.
Taking a 15 yr old to grandma as a babysitter seems super excessive to me.
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Post by peano on Jun 25, 2016 3:12:21 GMT
I left DS alone that long when he was 15. When I returned home, he'd be in the same position he was when I left, playing video games and watching YouTube videos about playing video games.
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kelly8875
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,391
Location: Lost in my supplies...
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Post by kelly8875 on Jun 25, 2016 3:15:31 GMT
12 hours? That's just a day of work and several errands...
My kids have stayed alone overnight.
Only you know your kid.... But a babysitter? That seems a little much. Heck, my 15 yo can legally drive herself to school without an adult.
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Post by hennybutton on Jun 25, 2016 3:15:58 GMT
I'd leave preschoolers home alone longer than teenagers.  |
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Peal
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,524
Jun 25, 2014 22:45:40 GMT
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Post by Peal on Jun 25, 2016 3:16:09 GMT
At 15? Yes, I would leave my DS alone for that long. I'm not even sure he would notice I was gone.
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Post by pierkiss on Jun 25, 2016 3:29:01 GMT
By 15 years old my parents were leaving me home alone for most of the entire weekend and in charge of my little brother. 12 hours alone is completely ok as long as HE is comfortable with that arrangement.
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Post by cmpeter on Jun 25, 2016 3:31:27 GMT
I would leave my 15 year old alone for that long...she would love it. All that time to veg with no one telling her what to do.
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Deleted
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Jun 8, 2024 22:32:39 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 25, 2016 3:34:24 GMT
I'll be a lone dissenter. I think it's because I work from home and DS doesn't like being left home for long (never has) although his window is getting longer. I would say our longest is more like 8-9 hours.
And it would depend on what hours it was 8am-8pm would be no big deal... something like 2pm to 2am would be different for us. Generally we would try to find a place for him to spend the night OR have DD#2 or DD#1 come or DD#1's boyfriend come over.
But that is just us. And I really don't want to end up with a party at our home of a bunch of teenagers that gets out of hand.
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Post by epeanymous on Jun 25, 2016 3:35:06 GMT
Barring a specific issue or situation with the kid, I would 't think twice about that at that age.
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Deleted
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Jun 8, 2024 22:32:39 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 25, 2016 3:39:59 GMT
For me, it's not only an issue of how long, but how far away we will be. If I'm nearby, I'm good leaving 15yo home alone from early morning until late evening. If we are traveling a good distance away, I think it still would be fine knowing that we have relatives nearby. But, I wouldn't be comfortable leaving him home alone overnight. Perhaps it's also because we live in a major city where crime and suspicious activities happen all the time.
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Post by 950nancy on Jun 25, 2016 3:42:45 GMT
I'd leave preschoolers home alone longer than teenagers. We clearly have different children. Ha! My teens never wanted their friends in the house. There is one friend (from kindergarten) who is allowed house privileges. He is 21. |
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Post by bunnyhug on Jun 25, 2016 3:51:53 GMT
A couple weeks ago, my 17.5 yo, 14 yo and 12.5 yo were home alone from Thursday morning to Sunday night. They got themselves off to school and sports and jobs, as well as keeping an eye on the two dogs. They had a long list of moms to call if they needed to, but they were totally fine--even made a cooking and kitchen clean up roster! I was 18 and three weeks old when I left home and lived in Australia for a year, so I figure a couple days at home are a good start on independence ...
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scrapmommy3
Junior Member
Posts: 52
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Post by scrapmommy3 on Jun 25, 2016 3:52:07 GMT
I leave them alone for about 9 hrs when I'm at work since its summer. I somehow imagine them waking up about 30 min before I get home. Except I see how many dishes they have dirtied I don't think 30 min is enough time for 3 different beverages, a bowl of cereal, grilled cheese, a mug cake and a bag of pretzels.....  |
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Post by AussieMeg on Jun 25, 2016 3:56:25 GMT
During the day I'd leave him home alone or with a friend. Overnight I would arrange for him to stay at a mate's house.
When I was a teenager none of the boys I knew would have agreed to stay with grandparents for 12 hours. Not a chance.
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Post by anonrefugee on Jun 25, 2016 4:02:52 GMT
I have newly 16 and 18 year old sons. I'd leave them alone, together, or separate overnight.
The sixteen year old might prove to be a one and done arrangement. But I doubt he'd cause any actual harm, only not be home the whole time. Decide to sneak to gym of something...
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Post by miominmio on Jun 25, 2016 6:59:14 GMT
DS17 will be home alone for eight days when the rest of us travel to France on Monday (and ftr, he could have come with us, but because there's nothing interesting to see in Paris, he chose to stay at home  ). |
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Post by walkerdill on Jun 25, 2016 7:39:01 GMT
Since its summer I have been leaving my 15yo dd & 12yo ds for 9+ hours everyday while I'm at work. So 12 hours wouldn't bother me. If it were overnight I probably would have them stay at my mom's rather than alone.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jun 25, 2016 8:52:53 GMT
I would leave them 12 hours as long as they had someone to call in case of emergency if I was going to be far away. I agree. Especially since he's just one teen. More than one teen together, or a teen having to watch younger siblings can be harder. But one 15 yr old for 12 hours? No problem as long as he knows who to call if he needs help. I mean, if not now, when will he be old enough? In three years he could be out on his own. He needs some practice. |
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AllieC
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,060
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Post by AllieC on Jun 25, 2016 9:03:56 GMT
Definitely Ok for me. My dd probably wouldn't have liked to be home by herself for that long but that is just her. I wouldn't have a problem with it.
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Deleted
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Jun 8, 2024 22:32:39 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 25, 2016 10:10:18 GMT
At 14 & 15 if I expected to be gone for more than 8 hours, I ask my mom if she'd like the chance to take them to dinner but nothing else.
I only do that because they're likely to get so wrapped up in their video games that they would forget to eat. Well, the 14 year old would.
Beyond that, I'd leave them alone. I'm not sure if I'm ready to leave them alone overnight yet.
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Post by ktdoesntscrap on Jun 25, 2016 11:15:23 GMT
My 13 year old would be fine. Though she probably wouldn't want to be home alone that long.
When I was a kid the rule for overnights was there had to be a driver in the house. So I was left home alone with my younger siblings.. same with my older siblings.
We always had people checking on us when my parents were gone for a long time or out of the country.
We had to get stitches, my sister had her appendix out, there were other things that went "wrong" but that did not stop my parents!
We also had numerous, massive parties. I would leave my 13 year old alone sooner than I would leave my 17 or 18 year old. (I don't have one yet. )
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Post by brina on Jun 25, 2016 11:27:40 GMT
Didn't we have this discussion not too long ago?
Last summer my then 15-year-old son was home for a couple of days on his own.
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Post by anxiousmom on Jun 25, 2016 11:49:47 GMT
During the day I'd leave him home alone or with a friend. Overnight I would arrange for him to stay at a mate's house. When I was a teenager none of the boys I knew would have agreed to stay with grandparents for 12 hours. Not a chance. My younger son loves spending time with his grandmother. She spoils him ROTTEN and for a grannie is a lot of fun-she would do 'Mimi Camp' every summer for a week and up until when the boys graduated from high school they would go to her house and have more fun they should be allowed to have.  To the answer though-mine have been spending nights and weekends alone at that age, so all day would be not be an issue. My youngest is currently 17, already graduated from high school and about 6 weeks away from going to college on his own. But you know your kid(s) best-is there is a reason you worry or is it just general mama anxiety? If it is the general worry, then this might be the perfect time to test the waters for you both.  |
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