|
|
Post by leftturnonly on Jul 8, 2016 19:35:43 GMT
Please think about what you really truly feel about black people and how it contributes to this. I have done just that for a very long time. How I feel is absolutely contrary to your opinion of peas that did not make the "correct comments" on this thread. One thing I have learned firsthand is how easy it is for some people of color to misinterpret very simple actions and/or words of people with whiter skin. They have been oversensitive and overreacted, separating themselves out from the larger community as if somehow, they were not being treated exactly the same way that everyone else was being treated. It hurts me when that has happened. How do you get someone to believe that you constantly mix names up and call someone by someone else's name - even your own kids - when they have decided that "Hey, all us black people look the same to you."? You can't. Anything you say from that point on only reinforces that belief in their eyes. I feel you've done the same thing here. What in the world can anyone say to you now that will allow you to think any differently? I hope you will notice that I haven't laid any blame here. It's understandable how these thoughts of racism are generalized to include many more people than it should. It's also time that you begin to realize that. Without having seen the videos, I can tell you that it sounds like both of these men died when they needn't have. The shooting in the car is especially horrific and I agree that Diamond Reynolds was heroic in streaming the incident live. And to think of that poor child.... I see a lifetime of carrying incredible pain ahead. ETA - I'm going to pull this out myself. Because it happens, as evidenced by these shootings. But it doesn't mean everyone is guilty. |
|
Olan
Pearl Clutcher
Enter your message here...
Posts: 4,053 
|
Post by Olan on Jul 8, 2016 19:44:51 GMT
Please think about what you really truly feel about black people and how it contributes to this. I have done just that for a very long time. How I feel is absolutely contrary to your opinion of peas that did not make the "correct comments" on this thread. One thing I have learned firsthand is how easy it is for some people of color to misinterpret very simple actions and/or words of people with whiter skin. They have been oversensitive and overreacted, separating themselves out from the larger community as if somehow, they were not being treated exactly the same way that everyone else was being treated.
It hurts me when that has happened. How do you get someone to believe that you constantly mix names up and call someone by someone else's name - even your own kids - when they have decided that "Hey, all us black people look the same to you."?
You can't. Anything you say from that point on only reinforces that belief in their eyes.
I feel you've done the same thing here.
What in the world can anyone say to you now that will allow you to think any differently?
I hope you will notice that I haven't laid any blame here. It's understandable how these thoughts of racism are generalized to include many more people than it should. It's also time that you begin to realize that.
Without having seen the videos, I can tell you that it sounds like both of these men died when they needn't have. The shooting in the car is especially horrific and I agree that Diamond Reynolds was heroic in streaming the incident live. And to think of that poor child.... I see a lifetime of carrying incredible pain ahead.
Please share with me where I made mention of "correct comments" or quoted what anyone said with the purpose of dissecting it. I haven't. I believe I was able to make bold a part of what you said that stood out most to me. |
|
Olan
Pearl Clutcher
Enter your message here...
Posts: 4,053
|
Post by Olan on Jul 8, 2016 19:51:52 GMT
May I ask why you removed parts of what you said? I can see that my attempt at making one part of it bold didn't work. Seems it all turned bold.
Edited to add: That's okay no need to explain.
Leftturnonly said: One thing I have learned firsthand is how easy it is for some people of color to misinterpret very simple actions and/or words of people with whiter skin. They have been oversensitive and overreacted, separating themselves out from the larger community as if somehow, they were not being treated exactly the same way that everyone else was being treated.
|
|
|
|
Post by leftturnonly on Jul 8, 2016 19:55:12 GMT
I have done just that for a very long time. How I feel is absolutely contrary to your opinion of peas that did not make the "correct comments" on this thread. One thing I have learned firsthand is how easy it is for some people of color to misinterpret very simple actions and/or words of people with whiter skin. They have been oversensitive and overreacted, separating themselves out from the larger community as if somehow, they were not being treated exactly the same way that everyone else was being treated. It hurts me when that has happened. How do you get someone to believe that you constantly mix names up and call someone by someone else's name - even your own kids - when they have decided that "Hey, all us black people look the same to you."? You can't. Anything you say from that point on only reinforces that belief in their eyes. I feel you've done the same thing here. What in the world can anyone say to you now that will allow you to think any differently? I hope you will notice that I haven't laid any blame here. It's understandable how these thoughts of racism are generalized to include many more people than it should. It's also time that you begin to realize that. Without having seen the videos, I can tell you that it sounds like both of these men died when they needn't have. The shooting in the car is especially horrific and I agree that Diamond Reynolds was heroic in streaming the incident live. And to think of that poor child.... I see a lifetime of carrying incredible pain ahead. Please share with me where I made mention of "correct comments" or quoted what anyone said with the purpose of dissecting it. I haven't. No. I'm not here to argue with you. You're angry. You're hurt. You're scared. You have reason to be and I won't play it down in any way. I'm just asking you to realize that you aren't as alone as you think you are. I want you to begin - just begin - to consider that people you may think of as uncaring to this plight may not be as uncaring as you may believe at this moment. I'll leave you be now. I don't want to add to the hurt. |
|
Olan
Pearl Clutcher
Enter your message here...
Posts: 4,053
|
Post by Olan on Jul 8, 2016 19:59:37 GMT
Please share with me where I made mention of "correct comments" or quoted what anyone said with the purpose of dissecting it. I haven't. No. I'm not here to argue with you. You're angry. You're hurt. You're scared. You have reason to be and I won't play it down in any way. I'm just asking you to realize that you aren't as alone as you think you are. I want you to begin - just begin - to consider that people you may think of as uncaring to this plight may not be as uncaring as you may believe at this moment. I'll leave you be now. I don't want to add to the hurt. I would like you to begin to see why I do feel alone. You were able to edit what you said (I saw it received it and placed it into memory by that juncture) but even after quiet reflection that's what you brought back to the discussion. Have you ever heard the saying your perception is your reality? When someone is scared and hurting responding the way you did reaffirms those feelings. Can you see that? I feel like I can share that with you since you already created this narrative where I smacked down every kind word offered to me. That isn't true. Leftturnonly said: One thing I have learned firsthand is how easy it is for some people of color to misinterpret very simple actions and/or words of people with whiter skin. They have been oversensitive and overreacted, separating themselves out from the larger community as if somehow, they were not being treated exactly the same way that everyone else was being treated. |
|
Olan
Pearl Clutcher
Enter your message here...
Posts: 4,053
|
Post by Olan on Jul 8, 2016 20:26:58 GMT
Please share with me where I made mention of "correct comments" or quoted what anyone said with the purpose of dissecting it. I haven't. I believe I was able to make bold a part of what you said that stood out most to me. It wasn't so much dissecting of people's comments Olan but a pretty broad brush statement that we lack concern, empathy and are willing to make "you" monsters. Your words on this thread: I appreciate you sharing your thoughts. My only point was if you compare the sentiments in both threads there is something to be taken from the lack of concern. Not only just a lack of empathy but also a willingness to make us monsters. You think it unfair but imagine how I am feeling. I seriously have sat in bed praying for miracles for you women and if I was shot by police I am 100% certain peas would tarnish my name and say I had a smart mouth. I'm sorry, but I wholeheartedly reject the implication in this statement. I haven't done this - and while I acknowledge the fact that I can't fully appreciate the pain going on in your community - your lashing out at the women on this board as unfeeling and willing to look at African Americans as monsters is just not fair. I'm not saying there aren't some bad apples here, but the vast majority are caring, decent women who would cry and grieve for you if the unspeakable happened. They just didn't share it this time because of the reasons LeftturnOnly and the other pea shared? I stand by what I said and feel like it doesn't need a defense because you can read what everyone wrote just like I did. Listen I totally get I can't force people to see me as a human being. I've watched a lot of people who look like me that came before me fail at it. If you think the commentary, the spirit of the peas and the intent was to show Olan or even the black community support....I say this with all the respect I can conjure up...huge fail. I mean look at how she worded what came to her after deep reflection. Not one pea said something like "Let's wait for the facts but man I feel so bad for that little girl" Not one pea. I don't care why. I just want you to know I see it. I want you to know it hurt me to think about her and think about how many scared white kids my father comforted. I feel like you guys don't get it. Well, I guess I was right about what you think, but as left turn said I am not of a mind to argue with you when you're hurting. To me, this isn't really a argument, just a discussion, but when you're upset it's easy to read intent that isn't there. Peace. It is easy to read into something when you are upset and hurting. I am taking everything I read here exactly at face value. When someone says I am sorry you are hurting BUT One thing I have learned firsthand is how easy it is for some people of color to misinterpret very simple actions and/or words of people with whiter skin. They have been oversensitive and overreacted, separating themselves out from the larger community as if somehow, they were not being treated exactly the same way that everyone else was being treated. My plan is to only focus on what happens after the but Olan - hello it's been awhile too bad it's this awful news story that's brought you back around i think i'm going to hold off judgment until more facts come out and even then, i'm gonna try to not judge because i don't put my life on the line every day and i don't struggle to survive in a less- than - hospitable environment gina |
|
luckyexwife
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,069
|
Post by luckyexwife on Jul 8, 2016 22:35:46 GMT
It wasn't so much dissecting of people's comments Olan but a pretty broad brush statement that we lack concern, empathy and are willing to make "you" monsters. Your words on this thread: I'm sorry, but I wholeheartedly reject the implication in this statement. I haven't done this - and while I acknowledge the fact that I can't fully appreciate the pain going on in your community - your lashing out at the women on this board as unfeeling and willing to look at African Americans as monsters is just not fair. I'm not saying there aren't some bad apples here, but the vast majority are caring, decent women who would cry and grieve for you if the unspeakable happened. They just didn't share it this time because of the reasons LeftturnOnly and the other pea shared? I stand by what I said and feel like it doesn't need a defense because you can read what everyone wrote just like I did. Listen I totally get I can't force people to see me as a human being. I've watched a lot of people who look like me that came before me fail at it. If you think the commentary, the spirit of the peas and the intent was to show Olan or even the black community support....I say this with all the respect I can conjure up...huge fail. I mean look at how she worded what came to her after deep reflection. Not one pea said something like "Let's wait for the facts but man I feel so bad for that little girl" Not one pea. I don't care why. I just want you to know I see it. I want you to know it hurt me to think about her and think about how many scared white kids my father comforted. I feel like you guys don't get it. Well, I guess I was right about what you think, but as left turn said I am not of a mind to argue with you when you're hurting. To me, this isn't really a argument, just a discussion, but when you're upset it's easy to read intent that isn't there. Peace. It is easy to read into something when you are upset and hurting. I am taking everything I read here exactly at face value. When someone says I am sorry you are hurting BUT One thing I have learned firsthand is how easy it is for some people of color to misinterpret very simple actions and/or words of people with whiter skin. They have been oversensitive and overreacted, separating themselves out from the larger community as if somehow, they were not being treated exactly the same way that everyone else was being treated. My plan is to only focus on what happens after the but Olan - hello it's been awhile too bad it's this awful news story that's brought you back around i think i'm going to hold off judgment until more facts come out and even then, i'm gonna try to not judge because i don't put my life on the line every day and i don't struggle to survive in a less- than - hospitable environment gina I am very sorry Olan. |
|
|
|
Post by dulcemama on Jul 9, 2016 13:26:36 GMT
I have not commented on this yet simply because I can't even begin to put into words how horrible I am feeling about this. I tear up every time I think about it.
I also just caught up with reading the thread and wanted to comment on this quote from Olan:
She is so right about the use of the word BUT after saying I'm sorry...it cancels out anything you said before it. And it's something I have heard and taken note of in discussions of race before. It's like we are just unable to say we are sorry without feeling like we have to push any blame away from ourselves. And, to a degree, I understand this. I don't want to be lumped in with a group of people who would do such a thing. But if we cannot let go of that uncomfortable feeling, we can not move forward.
But, as an example: How many times has someone come on here and told us about some negative thing that is going on in their life and we all express our heartfelt "I'm so sorry". No qualifiers. This is where we need to be when talking issues and incidents involving race. We need to be defenseless...without concern for defending ourselves....concern only for expressing our heartfelt "I'm so sorry".
So Olan, I want to say to you, I'm so very sorry that this has happened yet again. I am so very sorry that you have to live in fear for yourself and your children.
|
|
Olan
Pearl Clutcher
Enter your message here...
Posts: 4,053
|
Post by Olan on May 9, 2017 13:34:55 GMT
Please think about what you really truly feel about black people and how it contributes to this. I have done just that for a very long time. How I feel is absolutely contrary to your opinion of peas that did not make the "correct comments" on this thread. One thing I have learned firsthand is how easy it is for some people of color to misinterpret very simple actions and/or words of people with whiter skin. They have been oversensitive and overreacted, separating themselves out from the larger community as if somehow, they were not being treated exactly the same way that everyone else was being treated. It hurts me when that has happened. How do you get someone to believe that you constantly mix names up and call someone by someone else's name - even your own kids - when they have decided that "Hey, all us black people look the same to you."? You can't. Anything you say from that point on only reinforces that belief in their eyes. I feel you've done the same thing here. What in the world can anyone say to you now that will allow you to think any differently? I hope you will notice that I haven't laid any blame here. It's understandable how these thoughts of racism are generalized to include many more people than it should. It's also time that you begin to realize that. Without having seen the videos, I can tell you that it sounds like both of these men died when they needn't have. The shooting in the car is especially horrific and I agree that Diamond Reynolds was heroic in streaming the incident live. And to think of that poor child.... I see a lifetime of carrying incredible pain ahead. ETA - I'm going to pull this out myself. Because it happens, as evidenced by these shootings. But it doesn't mean everyone is guilty. |
|
