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Post by melly on Sept 20, 2016 2:10:26 GMT
I have too many lol. Once, I arrived home after work. It was about 3pm. I got out of the car, closed the car door, and then went around to get bags of groceries out of the back seat. I locked the back door and used my butt to slam it shut, because my arms were full. Well... That didn't go so well. My jeans pocket flap got stuck in the door as it closed. I was stuck by my butt to the back door or the car! Since the back door was locked, I reached forward to try to open the front door of the car and reach around to unlock it. However, I had accidentally locked that door too... With the KEYS inside the car!! I couldn't yank my pocket out of the door no matter how hard I tried! I thought maybe I could rip it off, but that fabric was made out of some kind indestructible fiber and I couldn't even get it to rip a little! I had no cell phone to call for help, and my husband wouldn't get home from work for at least 4 hours. I laughed. I cried. I tugged and pulled and cursed and prayed. I yelled for help. After about 2 hours, I had to pee so badly, I became desperate. By performing some never-before-seen, highly impressive gymnastics moves which required great strength and flexibility, I climbed up and out of my own jeans. They remained stuck in the door, and I remained locked out of my car and house... With no pants. My only option was to run across the highway at the crosswalk (during rush hour by this time, so there were a few horns honked in my direction...) to my landlord's house. She was a sweet old lady but did not see the humor of my situation, only the weirdness. She let me use her bathroom and lent me some pants and her spare key so I could get home. Upon arriving back to my driveway, I found my husband's car. He had gotten home early. Had I waited 2 minutes, I could have spared myself the pantsless highway dash and landlord embarrassment. My husband was standing near my car, looking at the pants hanging out of the door, the groceries on the ground, and turned around to see me with way too tiny hot pink lounge pants with a cat embroidered on the pocket. We both lost it at this point.... I am laughing again just thinking about it!
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Post by rmorgan22 on Sept 20, 2016 2:45:15 GMT
I'll tell my friends story that was pretty funny. She was on a first date at the drive in, if your too young to know what that is ask your mother, anyway she's looking at the movie screen as she move her mouth down to drink some soda out of a straw, never taking her eyes from the screen and then....the straw goes up her nose. She jerks her head back and the straw stays in her nose and come out of the cup. As she quickly pulls the straw out of her noes she looks over and they guy is watching her. He married her anyway.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 21, 2024 8:25:56 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Sept 20, 2016 4:01:18 GMT
My husband fell asleep ( we drive all night to get there) in the parking lot outside of Joann's in Butte.
Some very old guy comes in the store just shaking telling the clerk to call 911 , there's a dead guy in the wa st car.
My husband is leaning back with his mouth open to the floor of the car, all grey looking in the dismal morning light. Yup looked dead as door nail!
Bwahhhahahaha. OMG funny. I should let them call the police! He now covers his face.
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Post by jemali on Sept 20, 2016 13:30:43 GMT
I have too many lol. Once, I arrived home after work. It was about 3pm. I got out of the car, closed the car door, and then went around to get bags of groceries out of the back seat. I locked the back door and used my butt to slam it shut, because my arms were full. Well... That didn't go so well. My jeans pocket flap got stuck in the door as it closed. I was stuck by my butt to the back door or the car! Since the back door was locked, I reached forward to try to open the front door of the car and reach around to unlock it. However, I had accidentally locked that door too... With the KEYS inside the car!! I couldn't yank my pocket out of the door no matter how hard I tried! I thought maybe I could rip it off, but that fabric was made out of some kind indestructible fiber and I couldn't even get it to rip a little! I had no cell phone to call for help, and my husband wouldn't get home from work for at least 4 hours. I laughed. I cried. I tugged and pulled and cursed and prayed. I yelled for help. After about 2 hours, I had to pee so badly, I became desperate. By performing some never-before-seen, highly impressive gymnastics moves which required great strength and flexibility, I climbed up and out of my own jeans. They remained stuck in the door, and I remained locked out of my car and house... With no pants. My only option was to run across the highway at the crosswalk (during rush hour by this time, so there were a few horns honked in my direction...) to my landlord's house. She was a sweet old lady but did not see the humor of my situation, only the weirdness. She let me use her bathroom and lent me some pants and her spare key so I could get home. Upon arriving back to my driveway, I found my husband's car. He had gotten home early. Had I waited 2 minutes, I could have spared myself the pantsless highway dash and landlord embarrassment. My husband was standing near my car, looking at the pants hanging out of the door, the groceries on the ground, and turned around to see me with way too tiny hot pink lounge pants with a cat embroidered on the pocket. We both lost it at this point.... I am laughing again just thinking about it! I think we have a new winner! That was a hilarious story!
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julieb
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,845
Jul 3, 2014 16:02:54 GMT
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Post by julieb on Sept 20, 2016 13:38:44 GMT
Two pretty embarrassing - the first was at my niece's wedding. I went to the bathroom and walked across the entire vestibule of the venue (there was another wedding there - so many people), went on the dance floor and started dancing. My SIL's sister came up to me and told me my dress was stuck in my panty hose. My Sil's dad told her to tell me. Yep - walked across the entire front of the venue, into the ballroom, started dancing and not a single person stopped to tell me that my ss was hanging out. I stopped wearing hose and I check myself everytime I leave the bathroom....except the time I walked out of the bathroom with toilet paper hanging out that I had put on the seat. We were waiting to get into a local tv show audience and there it was - hanging out for the other people waiting to see. My sister and friends were in stitches.
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Post by Tasha on Sept 20, 2016 14:04:37 GMT
I have too many lol. Once, I arrived home after work. It was about 3pm. I got out of the car, closed the car door, and then went around to get bags of groceries out of the back seat. I locked the back door and used my butt to slam it shut, because my arms were full. Well... That didn't go so well. My jeans pocket flap got stuck in the door as it closed. I was stuck by my butt to the back door or the car! Since the back door was locked, I reached forward to try to open the front door of the car and reach around to unlock it. However, I had accidentally locked that door too... With the KEYS inside the car!! I couldn't yank my pocket out of the door no matter how hard I tried! I thought maybe I could rip it off, but that fabric was made out of some kind indestructible fiber and I couldn't even get it to rip a little! I had no cell phone to call for help, and my husband wouldn't get home from work for at least 4 hours. I laughed. I cried. I tugged and pulled and cursed and prayed. I yelled for help. After about 2 hours, I had to pee so badly, I became desperate. By performing some never-before-seen, highly impressive gymnastics moves which required great strength and flexibility, I climbed up and out of my own jeans. They remained stuck in the door, and I remained locked out of my car and house... With no pants. My only option was to run across the highway at the crosswalk (during rush hour by this time, so there were a few horns honked in my direction...) to my landlord's house. She was a sweet old lady but did not see the humor of my situation, only the weirdness. She let me use her bathroom and lent me some pants and her spare key so I could get home. Upon arriving back to my driveway, I found my husband's car. He had gotten home early. Had I waited 2 minutes, I could have spared myself the pantsless highway dash and landlord embarrassment. My husband was standing near my car, looking at the pants hanging out of the door, the groceries on the ground, and turned around to see me with way too tiny hot pink lounge pants with a cat embroidered on the pocket. We both lost it at this point.... I am laughing again just thinking about it! Haha! That sounds like a scene out of a sitcom! Hahah!!!
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Post by malibou on Sept 20, 2016 15:32:21 GMT
I was in my early twenties, living in New Jersey, quite near to NYC. My boyfriend's best friend's dad was a fancy attorney in Manhattan. One beautiful April day I had been invited to go to lunch with the attorney dad. It was to be my first time in NYC, and I was doing it by myself. I was excited and nervous and maybe a little scared. I picked a skirt and blouse combo and because it was warm, I opted for no pantyhose. As I was leaving, my boyfriend said that he thought I should wear pantyhose, as it seemed fancier. I go in, strip off my panties and tug into a pair of pantyhose. I take the train to NYC and then have to transfer to the subway and finally walk 4 blocks to get to my destination. The train ride was great, I get on the subway with no problem and as my stop arrives, I stand up and straighten my clothes, tucking my shirt in nicely and step off the subway. It gloriously warm and with all the tall buildings, there is no air moving. Immediately as I get up to street level, I am getting cat calls and whistles. As I walk down the street, it is really ramping up. I knew I looked pretty cute, but this seemed really excessive. Though I will admit, the attention had definitely put a little sass into my walk. Finally, just as I am reaching my destination, a homeless woman comes up to me and says "Girl, I lived in New York City my whole life and I ain't never see anybody walk that far not knowing they ass is hanging out." Yup, I had tucked my skirt into my waistband and nicely framed my pantyhose squeezed bare butt for all to see. rickmer, we would have been quite the pair of 20 somethings. Lol When I finally got up to the attorney's office, it was clear something had gone south. The attorney asked me if it would be okay if a client of his joined us for lunch. Of course I said sure. We get to lunch and it is so tense you could cut it with a knife. Turns out the client is getting ready to drop the law firm over some misunderstanding. Finally, the client turns to me to see how my first trip into NYC has gone. I decide to tell the story. By the time I am done both the attorney and the client are in hysterics. Totally broke the ice and the client changed his mind and all was well. For years the attorney told the story, and ended it with how my ass saved his ass. J
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rickmer
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,123
Jul 1, 2014 20:20:18 GMT
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Post by rickmer on Sept 20, 2016 16:22:34 GMT
that is hilarious!! glad your embarrassment was helpful to your friend's dad.... mine not so much. I am getting cat calls and whistles. As I walk down the street, it is really ramping up. I knew I looked pretty cute, but this seemed really excessive. Though I will admit, the attention had definitely put a little sass into my walk. i think this is highlighting a difference between new jersey/nyc and toronto.... that happens occasionally here but generally, most guys are more restrained so it would be an up and down look or perhaps an occasional whistle (well, back in the days when i was not invisible of course.... now i am old enough to the be the mother of the catcallers!!)
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Post by reedina on Sept 20, 2016 18:29:03 GMT
Love all these stories!
I have many I could share, but here's a recent one. My son and I were in London, and had to take the tube to King's Cross station and catch a train up North to Harrogate. It was about a 15 minute walk to the tube station, then a 10 minute walk into King's Cross. Then a 20-minute wait for the train. We left the hotel and did the journey, my son walking behind me most of the time as I led the way.
We made it to King's Cross and had been in the main area, looking at the big board that displays what platform each train will be on, for about 10 minutes. A woman taps me on my shoulder. She says, "I'm very embarrassed to tell you this, but you have a long piece of loo roll hanging out of the back of your trousers."
Yep. I had a LONG LONG LONG strand of toilet paper hanging off me. Not one square. Not two. Seriously 15 or more squares. This was after the walk to the tube, the tube ride, the walk to the station, where at any point my son could have told me that I was a walking TP dispenser. Did he tell me? NOOOOOOOO. He claims he never noticed.
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peaname
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,389
Aug 16, 2014 23:15:53 GMT
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Post by peaname on Sept 20, 2016 18:42:16 GMT
I got out of the shower one day and noticed the toilet across from me needed to be cleaned so I was bent over and scrubbing it when apparently my three year old had opened the door and announced his arrival with the following words:
"Why do you have that string hanging out of your butt?"
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rickmer
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,123
Jul 1, 2014 20:20:18 GMT
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Post by rickmer on Sept 20, 2016 19:54:42 GMT
"Why do you have that string hanging out of your butt?" sooo, what did you tell him???
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iluvpink
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,292
Location: Michigan
Jul 13, 2014 12:40:31 GMT
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Post by iluvpink on Sept 20, 2016 22:14:07 GMT
Several years ago I bought some new jeans at Old Navy. I wore them to work a few days later. Got to work, parked, walked a half mile to my office and sat down at my desk. Probably even got up and got some water from the lounge, used the restroom etc. Other coworkers got there and we chatted. About an hour after I got there a coworker walked in the door and immediately walked up to me and whispered that I had left the sticker strip with the size on it on the back of my pants.
I am quite "fluffy" so the size was not one anyone wants to advertise!
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Post by Lexica on Sept 20, 2016 23:20:10 GMT
These stories are so funny! I've never accidentally tucked my skirt into my underwear or pantyhose, but I have had to let others know about it- twice! And the first time it happened, I was horribly embarrassed about it.
I was at work. The company owned two buildings, and I went from the one I worked in, crossing the parking lot over to the other building. The room I entered had cubicles, but the dividers were high ones, about 5 ft, so that you could not see anyone that was sitting as you walked down the aisles between them. Up ahead of me I saw a woman come out of the restroom. I recognized her as a friend of my fiancé. When she turned to walk into her work area, I saw her skirt tucked into her big girl full white undies. Crap. And not just a small piece of her skirt, but a big chunk so that her entire granny panties showed across her backside. Do you think I could remember this woman's name? No! It would not come to me. I started walking faster toward her, trying my best to remember her name so I could call out and stop her from entering the next cubicle area where the cubicle walls were quite low and desks were gathered around an open space with a large table for laying out plans in the center. If she got that far, the whole room could have seen her from their seated positions.
** I should state that this was an engineering firm, and the guys all wore dress shirts and ties and there were very few women engineers in the place. It was also pretty quiet because most people were at their own desks working on their computers.**
Anyway, I was running out of time to warn her before she got to the entrance of the next pod. I decided to go with just plain old "excuse me!" trying to get her attention. Nothing. I said it louder and this time she turned around and just waved hello at me and continued walking! At this point, I was still quite aways away from her and I knew I was not going to catch up before she entered the next area. I was doing one of those runs where you try to look professional while you are doing it, but not quite pulling it off. You know, moving your legs, but your arms are straight down instead of pumping them. I decided to just go for it, I said, "Stop! Your skirt is hiked up and you do not want to walk in there like that!"
She kind of came to a stop mid stride, spun around, and started grabbing around the back of her knees where the skirt should be. She looked at me totally puzzled as to why there was no skirt there. I said, "it is tucked into the top of your, uh, unders" and I kind of mimed pulling a skirt down in back. I guess I said that part a bit a little more loudly than I intended because the room was suddenly alive with heads popping up over dividers like ground squirrels to see who was running down the main aisle, but more importantly, who had their skirt tucked into their "unders" She got the skirt yanked out, and I don't know which of us was more embarrassed. We just stood there for a second looking at each other, and wouldn't you know it, her name came to me. Emily! Double crap. Now I remember her name! Thankfully she didn't yell at me or anything. She just checked her skirt again, looked at me for approval that it was okay, and then went into the pod area. I kind of slinked out the side door because I wasn't going to walk back down that main aisle way for anything. I ended up going back to my building and calling the person that I was going to see and asked them to please stick some forms into the interoffice mail to me. I felt like a total jerk. But I couldn't let her just walk away without warning her, right?
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Post by peanuttle on Sept 20, 2016 23:21:28 GMT
Help me not feel so silly... I was sitting kind of slumped over in my car today, resting my head on my steering wheel. It was really silly, I was avoiding carrying in my groceries and doing my laundry, so I decided to hang out in my car a while and Facebook on my phone. All of a sudden my neighbor shouted my name and came running over. He thought I was passed out in my car. So I had to explain to him that I was really fine, just being lazy! Just a little embarrassing! Haha, sorry, but I love this! He probably got a kick out of it (or at least his wife will)!
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Post by malibou on Sept 20, 2016 23:48:40 GMT
Yup, me too. Hmm, how DID that happen?! J ETA did something wrong. Should say now I'm old enough to be the catcaller's mother.
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Post by malibou on Sept 21, 2016 0:15:55 GMT
I'm not easily embarrassed, and this story didn't embarrass me much. However, my husband loves to tell it and when he does people are horrified on my behalf.
I was 32 or so years old when this happened.
It was right at 8:00 in the morning and I was rushing to Longs Drugs right as it was opening. There were actually 3 of us all rushing at the same time. In front of me was a guy with a really nice pair of buns in jeans that fit just right. Behind me was a middle-aged lady with a big ass purse. And she was right on my tail.
The entrance has two doors. One is a regular door, but for some reason the other has a turn stile right after you enter. I'm sure it served some purpose at some point, but it was no longer relevant.
Anyway, I was checking out the guys butt as he went thru the normal door. I went thru the turn stile door as was the lady behind me intending to do. Because I was looking at the guys butt, I didn't see the unexpected turn stile, and launched over it smacking my forehead on the linoleum and in the process caught my feet in the lady's purse, which she very firmly was holding in the crook of her arm. Needless to say she was not expecting feet to fly up and tangle in the strap of her big-ass bag. She went flying backwards into the door frame as I separated her and her purse. In the meantime , the guy with the yummy buns, is only just a smidge ahead of me and sees it all happen. He immediately cracks up laughing. He is laughing so hard it's silent. It's like watching a cartoon. He can't help us as he can't control his body he is laughing so hard. I also crack up, but I am trying to untangle myself to check on the lady. I find myself a little dazed.
The store insisted on calling an ambulance to check us out. We were both okay, but boy howdy did I have a goose egg on my fringeless forehead.
Oh, and when the paramedics asked what happened, I explained that I was checking out the fanny on the guy ahead of me. They also cracked up and as their giggles settled, the lady piped up and said, "He really did look fine in those jeans."
See. It was just me. ;-)
J
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Post by shamrockpea on Sept 21, 2016 0:44:40 GMT
I was at a spa in Mexico where all the staff spoke Spanish (no English). I was having a mud wrap and was directed to a dressing room where I disrobed and a lady came in, covered me with mud, and wrapped me in plastic. I was then directed to go outside and lay on a cot to bake in the sun, with many other clients. I soon noticed that they were coming over and unwrapping people out there, in front of everyone, and having them get up and stand naked while a new towel was put around them. I was panicked and spent the entire time plotting how I would dash madly back to the dressing room after unwrapped. When they unwrapped me, I was so panicked I stumbled backwards and made a butt print (2 brown circles) on their white wall. I am pretty polite and had no choice but to take my towel and try to wipe the wall, standing there buck naked, covered in mud, except for my bare pink butt cheeks, while the staff ladies tried to withhold their giggles. Most embarrassing moment ever.
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Post by walkerdill on Sept 21, 2016 1:12:50 GMT
We went to carnival when my daughter was about 3 years old. They has this obstacle bounce house. It had a hole you went through and then you climbed over a wall. My daughter got over the wall then started crying that she couldn't find her way out and I couldn't see her. I looked for the guy running the bounce house but he was gone all of a sudden. I look at my mom and she was like Noway I'm going in. Mind you I'm a large lady and smart enough to know whats gonna happen but......
My baby was crying. So I did what any mom would do and jumped head first through the hole in the bounce house. The whole freaking thing collapses around me. Only now I'm stuck halfway in the bounce house with my legs hanging out. I can't get out. Meanwhile my baby is now screaming and I still can't see her. Im calling to my mom to please help pull me out. She is laughing hysterically. She is pulling & pulling on my legs. She finally pulls me out (which felt like it took hours!) And my shirt was up over my head. I pull my shirt down to see a rather large audience cracking up around me.
My poor kid had to find her own way out because I wasn't going back in! As soon as she got out we left....it was so embarrassing!
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