Cutesy names for inanimate objects

I know one person like that. Personification of every single thing. Her laptop, her fancy camera, her animal-shaped pool floatie, you name it, she's named it...

Overall, this person is from what I can gather actually a bit lonely. I guess she's compensating for the lack of social interactions by personifying all of these objects? I personally can't stand it when she talks about an object but with the name she's given it. "George was suffering working in the heat yesterday so I had to turn the fan on for him." I genuinely wondered who George was. Neighbour? Sexy handyman? Secret lover? Oh no, I'm sorry, George the LAPTOP.

I tried to include this person in my life more because I felt sorry for her but found out the hard way she's toxic (which I guess explains her loneliness at least to some extent). I guess she'll just have to spend more time with George, Frank, and the others instead. It's clearly a form of anthropomorphism and some sort of reflection of a maladjustment to adult life (children need to personify in play in order to grow acquainted with social norms and relationships). I think it's annoying, personally, but I try to keep in mind that this person is using it as a crutch, a coping mechanism. I sure as hell back away and allow myself to tune out when it gets on my nerves though. I'm not here to adapt to other people's fabricated worlds and crush my sanity in the process. "Who's Frank again? Oh wait, what's Frank again? Eff this." #RealistsGonnaRealist

cars yes - other stuff, no

I've never been one to name things, either, but ...

We run a small motel with a breakfast room for our guests. Therefore, we have two fridges in our kitchen; one for personal items and one for coffee shop supplies. The big one [our stuff] was always just called the big fridge, and the other one was smaller and called the little fridge. Well, the little fridge broke down and we bought a new one for the coffee shop stuff and wouldn't you know - it's bigger than the big fridge. I said to the grandkids "Well, we'll have to give them names so we can tell the difference more easily" and they decided on Brad and Janet [Rocky Horror Picture Show]. So now, Brad is our personal fridge and Janet is the coffee shop fridge. My DH absolutely refuses to call them by those names, and still refers to them as big and little.

Cars have names...mostly...we haven't named our van, though.  My husband wanted to go with something big and suggested a wrestler's name to which I quickly replied 'hell to the no' but we never settled on anything else.  I just call her (all cars are hers in my book) the behemoth...to the husband, she's probably still the wrestler's name, sigh.

We pat our dashboard too, and apologize/praise/etc whenever we tempt fate talking about her keeping on going, or about what we'll replace it with someday, or just to acknowledge how important it is that she/it keeps on running. It's a 1997 Honda Civic with just over 200k miles on it, so you know, it needs all the help it can get. In the past 3 years as we started a business we had no money to replace her if she died, and we added half of those miles during that period - a big shift from local weekend driving. No name though.

I wanted to name our house. She's 97 and a good old thing. But nothing felt natural. Named the garden Beetopia though.  

I have a few friends who name everything they own - staplers, coffee makers, plants. They are writers/storytellers and it makes them happy. It doesn't really bother me, but I don't have a need to do it and couldn't do it even when I tried. It feels like trying to hard when I do it.

(Except for the tumor on my spinal cord - I named him Pete ('cos I thought he was a pea sized tumor, but it turned out he was grape tomato sized) and he was also a literal pain in the butt - he stabbed me in the sciatic nerve constantly. It worked. Much better than saying "my tumor" all the time. Everyone called him Pete. Now that he got taken out I have ScarJo instead, but I don't have as many reasons to talk about her because she doesn't stab.)  

I call my boobs, The Girls, but other than that, no.

I call my car Bessy too, but I (mentally) spell it "Bessie." Usually if I'm trying to pass someone I'll say "come on, Bessie!" Or if the cruise control gets a little fast going up a hill I'll say "whoa Bessie."

I have yet to name any appliances or scrap supplies!

Aww, I didn't mean to generalise that anyone giving any object a name is lonely! Just noting that about the person I know who names every. single. thing. a human first name (not even a nickname). I literally cannot figure out whether it's a person or a thing she's mentioning when I hear her talk.    (spoiler: it's usually a thing)

LOL  I call my guy parts "the boys."  As for naming other objects the only things I have named are my car and my computer.  On the computer I never thought to name it until my oldest brother and SIL, who are both old school computer engineers (old school as in took their degrees in the 70's) told me it's heresy not to name your computer.  It's been a long known superstition in computer circles that naming your computer and other associated technology and speaking to it lovingly keeps it from breaking down or having a temper tantrum.  

No names here.

I've named my cars. My current one is Donna and nicknamed The Blueberry. I think the only other thing I've name is my SmartBoard at school. It even has a name tag. His name is Spaz because he always spazzes out and doesn't want to cooperate. It makes it easier to yell at him without saying inappropriate words in front of third graders.

I admit to name my vehicles, but I rarely call them by their name....unless I am thanking them for reminding me to put on my seat belt. And they are all boys. No girl cars here.

Just cars here. Hanks is a 2005 chevy optra on his last legs and Verna is a 2011 caravan. I work with someone who names everything and she is a LOON.