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Post by corinne11 on Sept 16, 2017 11:44:57 GMT
I am an atheist and although we got married by a celebrant in Fiji (very Christian place!) we specifically requested a non religious ceremony and included a lot of it ourselves. I wrote and spoke the eulogy at both my parent's funerals and was able to really connect to all the memories that made their lives special. I chose the celebrant for my mum's and she met with me and was very open to it being about mum and her life. Compared to my brother's sudden death aged 25- Mum and Dad were distraught so I was asked to write a few things down for the minister. It was quite a religious service complete with sermons and I really didn't feel that it was about him so much. My aunty recently died and her daughter organised her funeral- daughter became very religious after her marriage and my aunty' funeral was so religious and I felt sad and quite detached from her farewell. She did believe in God and had been brought up Catholic but the service was so general and was all about heaven etc. I think there would be a huge market for humanist celebrants - I think I will look for some here. How lovely for your children to support you achieve your dream. Best of luck.  Corinne |
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Post by JoP on Sept 16, 2017 13:46:29 GMT
Awww lesley that is indeed a wonderful and lovely gift  I'm thrilled to bits for you  |
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Post by Zee on Sept 16, 2017 13:52:50 GMT
Okay, for those of you who are not familiar with the term humanism, I've lifted this brief explanation from Humanists UK. Throughout recorded history there have been non-religious people who have believed that this life is the only life we have, that the universe is a natural phenomenon with no supernatural side, and that we can live ethical and fulfilling lives on the basis of reason and humanity. They have trusted to the scientific method, evidence, and reason to discover truths about the universe and have placed human welfare and happiness at the centre of their ethical decision making.
Today, people who share these beliefs and values are called humanists and this combination of attitudes is called Humanism. Many millions of people in Britain share this way of living and of looking at the world, but many of them have not heard the word ‘humanist’ and don’t realise that it describes what they believe.
A humanist celebrant conducts funerals, weddings, and naming ceremonies ( like christenings). They more or less take the role of a minister, leading the ceremony, discussing and celebrating the life of the deceased (in funerals, obviously). They spend time with the family, learning about the person, and helping to facilitate the type of funeral they want, working alongside an undertaker/funeral director. The key part is that the ceremony is not religious. I have been to religious funerals, which have been very anonymous when the deceased was not a religious person, church member etc. If there is no family member willing or able to deliver a eulogy, then that anonymity can make a sad occasion even sadder. Humanist funerals meet a need for people who don't want religion, but want more than just a graveside 'goodbye'. Interesting, I've never heard of "humanists" but I guess I've been living as one for some time now. What a great gift they gave you! |
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quiltz
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,696
Location: CANADA
Jun 29, 2014 16:13:28 GMT
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Post by quiltz on Sept 16, 2017 16:03:47 GMT
A humanist celebrant conducts funerals, weddings, and naming ceremonies ( like christenings). They more or less take the role of a minister, leading the ceremony, discussing and celebrating the life of the deceased (in funerals, obviously). They spend time with the family, learning about the person, and helping to facilitate the type of funeral they want, working alongside an undertaker/funeral director. The key part is that the ceremony is not religious. I have been to religious funerals, which have been very anonymous when the deceased was not a religious person, church member etc. If there is no family member willing or able to deliver a eulogy, then that anonymity can make a sad occasion even sadder. Humanist funerals meet a need for people who don't want religion, but want more than just a graveside 'goodbye'. Just wondering about my bolded part. I have always connected a christening with a religious ceremony. How is a Humanist Christening different than a Christening under the Church of England? This isn't a trick question, I am simply trying to define the difference between a Christian and a Humanist ceremony. Your children have given you a great birthday gift! The following is fro he Church of England website: churchofenglandchristenings.org/for-parents/is-a-baptism-different-to-a-christening/EXPLORING MORE ABOUT WHAT A CHRISTENING MEANS Your child is precious to you and precious to God. You want the very best for them, and so does God. You want them to make right choices in life, for themselves and for others. A christening is just the beginning of this and so much more. Over the years to come, it’s a journey you’ll share together with your child by: Being there for your child to talk to about the bigger questions of life – questions about hope, faith and love. Praying for your child through the ups and downs of their faith journey. Showing them practically how to make those good choices in life. Helping them to learn more about their Christian faith, through their church and in other ways. So it’s a commitment to start as you mean to go on. |
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moodyblue
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,173 
Location: Western Illinois
Site Supporter
Jun 26, 2014 21:07:23 GMT
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Post by moodyblue on Sept 16, 2017 16:11:16 GMT
That sounds very interesting. And with more and more people moving away from religion or organized religion, there's a real need for these types of services. I know that when we got married, we hired someone to perform it and he was willing to perform it with any level of religion - or none - that we wanted. It was important to us to have something more than a Justice of the Peace because we wanted a ceremony, but yet we didn't want something religious. I can definitely understand people wanting the same type of thing for a funeral. Without someone like that, a family wanting a nonreligious funeral could feel very . . . (I can't think of the right word, but alone, aloft, etc. comes to mind). We were the same way, about wanting a ceremony but no religion. We got married at the local botanical center and they had a list of officiants who would do weddings there, including a woman minister who was willing to do non-religious ceremonies. We had her do our wedding ceremony. I'd love that option for funerals and I think it would be more and more in demand. |
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Post by scrapmaven on Sept 16, 2017 16:12:42 GMT
That's a lovely gift. You have great kids.
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Post by bc2ca on Sept 16, 2017 16:14:27 GMT
I love that your kids are in tune with what you want to do and stepping in to help you get to your goal.  quiltz , the reference to a "naming ceremony (like a christening)" I didn't take to mean they perform an actual christening (which is religious), but a ceremony where the baby is honored, welcomed into the family and an explanation of the name possibly given. So the "like" means "similar to" not "for example" in this case. I hope I made sense. |
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lesley
Drama Llama
My best friend Turriff, desperately missed.
Posts: 7,172
Location: Scotland, Scotland, Scotland
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Post by lesley on Sept 16, 2017 16:29:46 GMT
quiltz , when I say a naming ceremony is like a christening, I mean is it is a ceremony aimed at welcoming babies or new children into a family. There are many people who want to mark the arrival of a new child in some way, and share that joy with family and friends, but because they aren't religious, and don't want to pretend they are, an actual christening isn't really appropriate. They want something more meaningful than just a party, and a naming ceremony can address that. HTH. (Oh, and I know nothing about the Church of England, as I was brought up in the Church of Scotland!  ).
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Post by burningfeather on Sept 16, 2017 16:48:18 GMT
That sounds very interesting. And with more and more people moving away from religion or organized religion, there's a real need for these types of services. I know that when we got married, we hired someone to perform it and he was willing to perform it with any level of religion - or none - that we wanted. It was important to us to have something more than a Justice of the Peace because we wanted a ceremony, but yet we didn't want something religious. I can definitely understand people wanting the same type of thing for a funeral. Without someone like that, a family wanting a nonreligious funeral could feel very . . . (I can't think of the right word, but alone, aloft, etc. comes to mind). We were the same way, about wanting a ceremony but no religion. We got married at the local botanical center and they had a list of officiants who would do weddings there, including a woman minister who was willing to do non-religious ceremonies. We had her do our wedding ceremony. I'd love that option for funerals and I think it would be more and more in demand. How funny. Ours was at a botanical center too! |
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azredhead
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,755
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Post by azredhead on Sept 16, 2017 16:55:39 GMT
This sounds very intresting indeed.. What a wonderful present idea and so thoughtful of them! You'll have to tell us how it goes.. If you want to.
For my moms funeral we did something similar. I wouldn't even call it a wake. We weren't sure what to call it. We come from a very mixed bag in my family. But we grew up very religious. My mom didn't want an religious 'funeral'. more like a party. It wasn't even a real celebration of life. I've been to a few of those. Her's was truly unique. We held it in a small community center they lived in. (my sister is in the same neighborhood and knows the people who run it so they gave us free reign so to speak) We've done their Anniv party their before. Anway.. we had light foods. And music. My neices all did something different. It was organized sort of. But our biggest concern was we didn't want anyone to be uncomfortable or offended. We wanted people to come and visit and chat and share stories of the family. It worked. My brother did a little intro at the begining and at the end and if we wanted to get up and share things we could. I decided then and before I think my mom was right in that some religous funeral, (with good intent) are terribly depressing. I've been to some horrible ones. Death is hard but life should be celebrated. I was very happy with how her's went with our fears and all. It sounds like it's similar. We actually had our religious family say.. ok I think I might do this instead. It's not as horrible! LOL!
My cousins wedding just a few months ago was also simiar and her family is super religous. And they were all at my moms funeral as wel. But her SIL is 'ordained' like yours. She does lots of stuff on the side. I would be very intrested in hearing how it goes for you. Sounds like a very good thing!
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MDscrapaholic
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Posts: 6,345
Location: Down by the bay....
Jun 25, 2014 20:49:07 GMT
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Post by MDscrapaholic on Sept 16, 2017 17:20:10 GMT
How nice! I hope your application is accepted and you can start on this new endeavor. Please keep us updated!
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joelise
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,649
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Post by joelise on Sept 16, 2017 19:07:26 GMT
What a great gift. That's so interesting, I hope it works for you, let us know how it goes.
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Post by birukitty on Sept 17, 2017 0:16:27 GMT
I'm so happy for you and thrilled that your children through their gift have made it possible for you to follow your dream! Have an amazing time as you go forward and keep us posted.
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Post by AussieMeg on Sept 17, 2017 0:31:50 GMT
What a great birthday present for you!
I like the sound of Humanist weddings and funerals. I've been to plenty of non-religious weddings and funerals before, and a couple of naming days, but they haven't had the "Humanist" tag on them. How would a Humanist wedding/funeral differ to just the run-of-the-mill non-religious ceremony? Or would they be the same?
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Nanner
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,962
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Post by Nanner on Sept 17, 2017 5:58:04 GMT
Congratulations, Lesley! What a wonderful gift
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Post by flanz on Sept 17, 2017 6:27:47 GMT
Okay, for those of you who are not familiar with the term humanism, I've lifted this brief explanation from Humanists UK. Throughout recorded history there have been non-religious people who have believed that this life is the only life we have, that the universe is a natural phenomenon with no supernatural side, and that we can live ethical and fulfilling lives on the basis of reason and humanity. They have trusted to the scientific method, evidence, and reason to discover truths about the universe and have placed human welfare and happiness at the centre of their ethical decision making.
Today, people who share these beliefs and values are called humanists and this combination of attitudes is called Humanism. Many millions of people in Britain share this way of living and of looking at the world, but many of them have not heard the word ‘humanist’ and don’t realise that it describes what they believe.
A humanist celebrant conducts funerals, weddings, and naming ceremonies ( like christenings). They more or less take the role of a minister, leading the ceremony, discussing and celebrating the life of the deceased (in funerals, obviously). They spend time with the family, learning about the person, and helping to facilitate the type of funeral they want, working alongside an undertaker/funeral director. The key part is that the ceremony is not religious. I have been to religious funerals, which have been very anonymous when the deceased was not a religious person, church member etc. If there is no family member willing or able to deliver a eulogy, then that anonymity can make a sad occasion even sadder. Humanist funerals meet a need for people who don't want religion, but want more than just a graveside 'goodbye'. How exciting, Lesley! Congratulations! How wonderful that you have raised such thoughtful and generous children. I am a Unitarian Universalist and my minister is a spiritual humanist and an atheist. The UU celebrations of life that I have attended, be they weddings, baby namings, memorial services etc, have been beautifully personal and meaningful and moving. <3 |
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Post by flanz on Sept 17, 2017 6:30:54 GMT
Okay, for those of you who are not familiar with the term humanism, I've lifted this brief explanation from Humanists UK. Throughout recorded history there have been non-religious people who have believed that this life is the only life we have, that the universe is a natural phenomenon with no supernatural side, and that we can live ethical and fulfilling lives on the basis of reason and humanity. They have trusted to the scientific method, evidence, and reason to discover truths about the universe and have placed human welfare and happiness at the centre of their ethical decision making.
Today, people who share these beliefs and values are called humanists and this combination of attitudes is called Humanism. Many millions of people in Britain share this way of living and of looking at the world, but many of them have not heard the word ‘humanist’ and don’t realise that it describes what they believe.
A humanist celebrant conducts funerals, weddings, and naming ceremonies ( like christenings). They more or less take the role of a minister, leading the ceremony, discussing and celebrating the life of the deceased (in funerals, obviously). They spend time with the family, learning about the person, and helping to facilitate the type of funeral they want, working alongside an undertaker/funeral director. The key part is that the ceremony is not religious. I have been to religious funerals, which have been very anonymous when the deceased was not a religious person, church member etc. If there is no family member willing or able to deliver a eulogy, then that anonymity can make a sad occasion even sadder. Humanist funerals meet a need for people who don't want religion, but want more than just a graveside 'goodbye'. Interesting, I've never heard of "humanists" but I guess I've been living as one for some time now. What a great gift they gave you! They're everywhere! I should say we are everywhere. I identify as an atheist and a spiritual humanist and am a Unitarian Universalist. americanhumanist.org/ |
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None
Full Member
Posts: 453
Sept 17, 2017 13:10:30 GMT
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Post by None on Sept 17, 2017 13:15:10 GMT
When I first read your initial post, I thought, at what? But after you posted the description, I thought, THAT IS AWESOME. This is what I believe myself and my daughter are. I am/was a Catholic, but do not go to church for so many reasons. My daughter is a person who just doesnt believe in the higher power thing. But does believe in the being a good person thing. I may have to start identifying as a Humanist. Thanks for sharing your info and your great birthday gift.
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anniebygaslight
Drama Llama
I'd love a cup of tea. #1966
Posts: 7,394
Location: Third Rock from the sun.
Jun 28, 2014 14:08:19 GMT
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Post by anniebygaslight on Sept 17, 2017 13:22:56 GMT
Wonderful. We have a friend who is a humanist celebrant. He now does it full time and has a waiting list.
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Post by flanz on Sept 17, 2017 22:07:03 GMT
When I first read your initial post, I thought, at what? But after you posted the description, I thought, THAT IS AWESOME. This is what I believe myself and my daughter are. I am/was a Catholic, but do not go to church for so many reasons. My daughter is a person who just doesnt believe in the higher power thing. But does believe in the being a good person thing. I may have to start identifying as a Humanist. Thanks for sharing your info and your great birthday gift. I was raised Catholic too and when I left the church I believed with all my heart that i would never, ever be part of any religious organization again. 7 or 8 years later I walked into my local Unitarian Universalist congregation and knew that I had found what my heart had been yearning for. My minister is an atheist and a spiritual humanist which is how I identify as well. |
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 3, 2024 20:37:37 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Sept 18, 2017 12:57:35 GMT
What an amazing gift. You raised some good kids!
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Post by flanz on Sept 28, 2017 19:49:28 GMT
That sounds very interesting. And with more and more people moving away from religion or organized religion, there's a real need for these types of services. I know that when we got married, we hired someone to perform it and he was willing to perform it with any level of religion - or none - that we wanted. It was important to us to have something more than a Justice of the Peace because we wanted a ceremony, but yet we didn't want something religious. I can definitely understand people wanting the same type of thing for a funeral. Without someone like that, a family wanting a nonreligious funeral could feel very . . . (I can't think of the right word, but alone, aloft, etc. comes to mind). We were the same way, about wanting a ceremony but no religion. We got married at the local botanical center and they had a list of officiants who would do weddings there, including a woman minister who was willing to do non-religious ceremonies. We had her do our wedding ceremony. I'd love that option for funerals and I think it would be more and more in demand. Find a Unitarian Universalist minister when the need arises. |
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