Deleted
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Apr 19, 2024 8:20:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2018 17:53:34 GMT
"A local newspaper in Texas removed references to a gay couple in their mother’s obituary, citing ”religious and ethical reasons,” Fox News 4 reports. Barry Giles and John Gambill, who have been married for 31 years, say the Olto, Texas paper scrubbed references to Gambill after Giles’ mom died. The couple had included both their names in the obituary they sent to Giles’ hometown paper, writing “those left to cherish her memory include her son, Barry Giles and his husband, John Gambill of Dallas.”" Because "morals" or "family values" I'm sure..... Disgusting that they can't print that the deceased's child had a husband. Because committed consensual love is in some way "immoral" to their stunted way of iron age thinking. And yet I often hear how "evangelicals" don't tell others how to live. Maybe some don't, but too many IN POWER do. www.fox4news.com/news/newspaper-edits-out-dallas-same-sex-couples-reference-in-obit
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michellegb
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,914
Location: New England and loving it!
Jun 26, 2014 0:04:59 GMT
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Post by michellegb on Mar 16, 2018 18:07:52 GMT
For the love of Pete, why does anyone care and how does it affect them? Just inflict your moral belief on those around you and it's ok if it's painful for them because you're on the side of right. I really don't like people. I
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Post by revirdsuba99 on Mar 16, 2018 18:12:39 GMT
Love thy neighbor! Only God can judge! They paper is showing good Christian values or so they claim, NOT!
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schizo319
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,030
Jun 28, 2014 0:26:58 GMT
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Post by schizo319 on Mar 16, 2018 18:12:56 GMT
That is so revolting and shameful. I cannot imagine deliberately causing someone in grief more pain because of some effed up sense of "morality". Then again, I imagine that there would be some nasty homophobic commentary about their marriage in their mom's memorial pages so they'd have increased grief and stress either way... I just don't understand it - fine, THEY think it's a sin, so what?!?! It's none of their business. And yet I often hear how "evangelicals" don't tell others how to live. Maybe some don't, but too many IN POWER do. I do have to say that I have NEVER heard an evangelical say that they don't TELL others to live, not that they've ever readily admitted it, but I've never had one outright LIE to my face about it. Isn't that exactly what evangelicalism is? Telling people to be a Christians and thus how to live their lives? I thought that was sort of the whole point of being an evangelical (to evangelize to the masses).
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Post by lucyg on Mar 16, 2018 18:14:29 GMT
arggh. These are the people who elected the guy who's going to give us a generation of far-right-wing judges.
As an aside, how has this couple been married for 31 years? Did they get married in another country? Is there any country that allowed same-sex marriage 31 years ago?
I'm guessing (I guess) they were non-legally married 31 years ago in a non-official ceremony. Doesn't really matter, I was just wondering about the terminology.
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Post by flanz on Mar 16, 2018 18:26:20 GMT
I wondered the same thing, lucyg, but it's a minor point, as I'm sure you agree. This type of meddling in people's lives makes me fume! The haters amongst us... ugh!!! I'd probably be considering a lawsuit if I was the gay couple... FULL EQUALITY FOR ALL!!
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Post by flanz on Mar 16, 2018 18:26:48 GMT
Guessing I'm not the only one wishing we could hear Virginia's opinion on this...
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TXMary
Pearl Clutcher
And so many nights I just dream of the ocean. God, I wish I was sailin' again.
Posts: 2,793
Jun 26, 2014 17:25:06 GMT
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Post by TXMary on Mar 16, 2018 18:28:41 GMT
If you've ever been to Olton, you wouldn't be the least bit surprised. It's a different world out there. That's the area of Texas that my DH is from and that's one of the many reasons why he left there right out of college and never went back. I would guess this newspaper comes out maybe once or twice a week. My DH has always known if he ever wants to move back to that area of Texas, he will have to get a divorce first because I'm not going. Luckily, he has never wanted to.
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Post by mom on Mar 16, 2018 18:30:04 GMT
arggh. These are the people who elected the guy who's going to give us a generation of far-right-wing judges. As an aside, how has this couple been married for 31 years? Did they get married in another country? Is there any country that allowed same-sex marriage 31 years ago? I'm guessing (I guess) they were non-legally married 31 years ago in a non-official ceremony. Doesn't really matter, I was just wondering about the terminology. What the article says is that they were 'together for 31 years'. I suspect they were like my brother and his husband - they were together (unmarried, but committed as if they were) until they could legally get married.
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MizIndependent
Drama Llama
Quit your bullpoop.
Posts: 5,836
Jun 25, 2014 19:43:16 GMT
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Post by MizIndependent on Mar 16, 2018 18:30:39 GMT
And yet I often hear how "evangelicals" don't tell others how to live. Evangelical is not mentioned even one time in this article. If anything, you should have stipulated "baptist" if you really felt the need to label. ETA: When are people going to stop labeling others and instead just call wrong as it is? Labeling doesn't help anything. Calling out wrongs no matter where the occur might. And just to be clear, this Phillip Hamilton is clearly a judgemental asshole who I feel is entirely wrong.
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schizo319
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,030
Jun 28, 2014 0:26:58 GMT
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Post by schizo319 on Mar 16, 2018 18:31:09 GMT
As an aside, how has this couple been married for 31 years? Did they get married in another country? Is there any country that allowed same-sex marriage 31 years ago? I'm guessing (I guess) they were non-legally married 31 years ago in a non-official ceremony. Doesn't really matter, I was just wondering about the terminology. I wondered that too, so I looked it up. It appears that Denmark was the first country to recognize same sex unions (though I don't believe they were "marriages" at the time) in 1989, so it seems like it isn't possible for them to have been married for 31 years as it's only been legal in Denmark for 29 years. I agree that it doesn't matter whether it was a legal marriage or not, they made a commitment together and have lived together as husbands for 31 years. These days, I've seen MANY obits that mentioned the significant others of the surviving family members who aren't married but have live-in partners without mentioning whether they are married or not. It's usually printed with parenthesis like this "survived by son John Doe (Jane Smith), daughter Elizabeth Taylor (Tom Taylor) etc. Hacks me right off that a live-in lover can get a mention which is also ostensibly immoral, but this couple hasn't been afforded the same respect.
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Post by mom on Mar 16, 2018 18:31:39 GMT
If you've ever been to Olton, you wouldn't be the least bit surprised. It's a different world out there. That's the area of Texas that my DH is from and that's one of the many reasons why he left there right out of college and never went back. I would guess this newspaper comes out maybe once or twice a week. My DH has always known if he ever wants to move back to that area of Texas, he will have to get a divorce first because I'm not going. Luckily, he has never wanted to. YES. This is semi-local to me. Olton is a very backwoods, ultra conservative, small town.
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Post by flanz on Mar 16, 2018 18:41:34 GMT
If you've ever been to Olton, you wouldn't be the least bit surprised. It's a different world out there. That's the area of Texas that my DH is from and that's one of the many reasons why he left there right out of college and never went back. I would guess this newspaper comes out maybe once or twice a week. My DH has always known if he ever wants to move back to that area of Texas, he will have to get a divorce first because I'm not going. Luckily, he has never wanted to. YES. This is semi-local to me. Olton is a very backwoods, ultra conservative, small town. I know they exist... but I hate that they do. I'm guessing the gay couple doesn't live there... sounds like that would be a version of hell on earth.
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Post by lucyg on Mar 16, 2018 18:43:48 GMT
arggh. These are the people who elected the guy who's going to give us a generation of far-right-wing judges. As an aside, how has this couple been married for 31 years? Did they get married in another country? Is there any country that allowed same-sex marriage 31 years ago? I'm guessing (I guess) they were non-legally married 31 years ago in a non-official ceremony. Doesn't really matter, I was just wondering about the terminology. What the article says is that they were 'together for 31 years'. I suspect they were like my brother and his husband - they were together (unmarried, but committed as if they were) until they could legally get married. Thank you! Of course I couldn't be bothered to click the link and read the actual story.
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Mar 16, 2018 18:48:47 GMT
I suspect @zingermack didn't mean the Evangelical thing literally, about the newspaper's editor, but rather metaphorically.
In the sense that posters always write 'I've never had anyone tell me what to do or how to think' but this is a black and white example of it. People might not think it's done, but it happens-- whether it's overt or not is another story, but it does happen.
The newspaper editor might not outright have WRITTEN "I don't approve of your gay lifestyle" but he sure as heck foisted his opinion into the newspaper copy, thus 'telling his readers how to think.' (by omitting info in this case, but still...)
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Post by revirdsuba99 on Mar 16, 2018 18:57:04 GMT
arggh. These are the people who elected the guy who's going to give us a generation of far-right-wing judges. With this. Judges are not supposed to use their PERSONAL beliefs/thoughts/ideas in making decisions! Decisions are made by LAW and following the Constitution!
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Apr 19, 2024 8:20:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2018 19:03:07 GMT
Reading the article it sounds as if the editor wouldn't publish the " lie" of one of them being the husband when in fact they were not married. What a lame excuse though. If the editor had a problem with the " lie" couldn't he have contacted one of them and suggested he changed it to partner if it bothered him so much. Good grief there are many many people out there surely that are living together as a married couple but are not in fact actually legally married. I wonder if he would have done the same for a male and female partnership that were not actually married, I bet not!
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freebird
Drama Llama
'cause I'm free as a bird now
Posts: 6,927
Jun 25, 2014 20:06:48 GMT
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Post by freebird on Mar 16, 2018 19:08:08 GMT
How long has gay marriage been allowed in Canada? A friend of mine and his husband have been married for something like 17 years. They were married in canada.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Apr 19, 2024 8:20:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2018 19:15:55 GMT
I agree that if they're not married (and haven't been able to confirm yes or no on that), the paper should have suggested replacing "husband" with "partner". But if Barry wanted to stick w/husband, it should have run as they wanted. After all, obits are full of stretches of the truth when it comes to "so and so survived by loving spouse" etc. when the people who knew them knew that there was minimal "loving" involved. The editor inserted his beliefs into their grief. And it is disgusting to me. As for how Brenda may have felt:
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Apr 19, 2024 8:20:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2018 19:15:59 GMT
My aunt( by marriage) daughter left her son's husband out of his obit .
They left both of them out of my aunt's obit She died in feb.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Apr 19, 2024 8:20:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2018 19:16:56 GMT
How long has gay marriage been allowed in Canada? A friend of mine and his husband have been married for something like 17 years. They were married in canada. I don't know about Canada but in the UK we had what they called a civil partnership for years which granted legally, all the same rights as a male/female marriage before they passed the same sex marriage act .Maybe they had something similar.
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Post by Darcy Collins on Mar 16, 2018 19:20:11 GMT
Reading the article it sounds as if the editor wouldn't publish the " lie" of one of them being the husband when in fact they were not married. What a lame excuse though. If the editor had a problem with the " lie" couldn't he have contacted one of them and suggested he changed it to partner if it bothered him so much. Good grief there are many many people out there surely that are living together as a married couple but are not in fact actually legally married. I wonder if he would have done the same for a male and female partnership that were not actually married, I bet not! I had to wonder how many other "lies" the editor felt the need to correct in obituaries. Let's face it - there isn't anyone reading obituaries looking for hard hitting facts which would make him need to protect his journalistic integrity.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Apr 19, 2024 8:20:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2018 19:24:36 GMT
This report says married (at least now, probably not legally married for the full 31 years together). "Barry Giles and John Gambill are married and have been together for 31 years. When Giles’ mother died, he submitted an obituary to the local paper, the Olton Enterprise. The paper removed references to Gambill." Towleroad publishes many lgbt-related stories. www.towleroad.com/2018/03/gay-obituary/
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Apr 19, 2024 8:20:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2018 19:25:15 GMT
Reading the article it sounds as if the editor wouldn't publish the " lie" of one of them being the husband when in fact they were not married. What a lame excuse though. If the editor had a problem with the " lie" couldn't he have contacted one of them and suggested he changed it to partner if it bothered him so much. Good grief there are many many people out there surely that are living together as a married couple but are not in fact actually legally married. I wonder if he would have done the same for a male and female partnership that were not actually married, I bet not! I had to wonder how many other "lies" the editor felt the need to correct in obituaries. Let's face it - there isn't anyone reading obituaries looking for hard hitting facts which would make him need to protect his journalistic integrity. I agree, as I said a very lame excuse.Bet he doesn't go round checking anyone else's legal status before publishing.
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Post by Mel on Mar 16, 2018 20:26:00 GMT
My SO's Dad passed away last year and his obit even listed me "survived by two sons Jerry(Melissa my last name), and Rodney (Chandra). I was touched that I was included since we aren't married.
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jayfab
Drama Llama
procastinating
Posts: 5,516
Jun 26, 2014 21:55:15 GMT
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Post by jayfab on Mar 16, 2018 20:32:15 GMT
Unflipping believable. I'm so angry I can't write anything else.
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Post by sunraynnc on Mar 17, 2018 0:11:44 GMT
No one reads the newspaper anymore.
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Mar 17, 2018 0:16:16 GMT
so THAT makes it perfectly okay, then, of course!
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Post by megop on Mar 17, 2018 0:53:41 GMT
Fox News. Interesting.
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mlana
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,523
Jun 27, 2014 19:58:15 GMT
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Post by mlana on Mar 17, 2018 1:22:03 GMT
Instead of blaming Evangelicals, I’d be pissed that some arm of the press decided to censor an obit. Newspapers are supposed to be neutral, to report facts, not give opinions. No excuse for this on a professional level, no matter the religion involved.
I come from such a small, Bible Belt town, the local radio station refused to play Dolly Parton’s ‘Baby I’m Burning” when i was in high school. Even that newspaper reports spouses regardless of their sex.
Marcy
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