Deleted
Posts: 0
Apr 17, 2024 20:57:52 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 9, 2020 15:30:37 GMT
I’m devastated and really struggling. I lost one of my longest and closest friends to suspected Covid-19 on Tuesday - I can’t stop sobbing and crying and it shouldn’t be like this, she was only 54 her granddaughter is not yet one. I can’t go and comfort any of them. Her two children were like my own as we never had children JoP I'm so sorry. I want to just wrap you up in the biggest hug and tell you it's ok I've got you
My husbands grandma died, it's not clear if it was the virus or not, she developed a very high fever and was gone. My husband hasn't reacted to the news other than to say he's fine
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Apr 17, 2024 20:57:52 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 9, 2020 15:33:42 GMT
Many many hugs to everyone struggling on this thread, some overwhelmingly so. It makes me somewhat guilty to say that I'm coping OK but it doesn't make me not have empathy with the ones that don't. Please take care of yourselves. I'm so so sorry JoP that you've lost such a special friend. How devastating for you and her family, words seem very inadequate at times like these, take care (((hugs))))
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joelise
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,649
Jul 1, 2014 6:33:14 GMT
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Post by joelise on Apr 9, 2020 15:33:46 GMT
I’m devastated and really struggling. I lost one of my longest and closest friends to suspected Covid-19 on Tuesday - I can’t stop sobbing and crying and it shouldn’t be like this, she was only 54 her granddaughter is not yet one. I can’t go and comfort any of them. Her two children were like my own as we never had children JoP I'm so sorry. I want to just wrap you up in the biggest hug and tell you it's ok I've got you
My husbands grandma died, it's not clear if it was the virus or not, she developed a very high fever and was gone. My husband hasn't reacted to the news other than to say he's fine Sorry for your loss. It’s all so incredibly sad x
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Post by gar on Apr 9, 2020 15:42:47 GMT
Sorry for your loss lainey 😕 Is he a man who normally keeps his emotions dampened down? Such a hard time to make sense of these things at the moment!
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Apr 17, 2024 20:57:52 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 9, 2020 15:49:44 GMT
Sorry for your loss lainey 😕 Is he a man who normally keeps his emotions dampened down? Such a hard time to make sense of these things at the moment! I really think it just hasn't sunk in yet
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Post by LisaDV on Apr 9, 2020 16:18:14 GMT
I started a long response but halfway through the second page, I knew I just couldn’t respond individually to all. So To lainey, malibou, and JoP, I’m so sorry for your losses. To myshelly, your post broke my heart. Please realize that this is only temporary. Yes, it may be a long temporary and feel even longer, but it will pass. As Really Red said, you are not going to tell your kids something is cancelled without giving them hope, okay? You are going to tell them it is postponed until they can be safe. You let them know it will give you more time to plan and figure out things. You will all make it through this and be great on the other side. They need you to tell them this. You've got US to tell you that, okay? Come here when you feel bad. You can do this. To all of those responding here, I’m sending you a great big hug. I think we need a virtual happy hour or two.
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Post by malibou on Apr 9, 2020 16:19:26 GMT
JoP so very sorry for the loss of your dear friend.
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RosieKat
Drama Llama
PeaJect #12
Posts: 5,372
Jun 25, 2014 19:28:04 GMT
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Post by RosieKat on Apr 9, 2020 16:47:28 GMT
I've been mostly OK up till now, because there's been stuff that needs doing and it's been a new kind of situation. But I'm kind of feeling a bit more down. I think a lot of it is due to the fact that under normal circumstances, I'm usually at home all day alone and am fine with that. Now, however, I have 2 kids and my husband home all the time and while I love them dearly, I need some alone time. The noise level also drives me batty. If I could just go get lunch out alone or something, I could recharge that battery, but I can't. Compounding the issue is that my house is pretty open concept and there is no frickin' place I can hide. I don't see a solution to this problem. I know it's not life or death but it's still a real challenge for me. 2020 was already a challenging year for our family and I hadn't really recharged from all those issues, so I came into this with depleted tanks.
I'll be fine, I'm just worn out at the moment and it's getting me down.
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smartypants71
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,693
Location: Houston, TX
Jun 25, 2014 22:47:49 GMT
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Post by smartypants71 on Apr 9, 2020 17:03:05 GMT
I am doing just ok. I am grateful to still be working from home full time. My company understandably deferred our 2019 bonuses, but it would have been nice to have that buffer. I don't know what the outlook of my company is though, so it is really stressful not knowing the future of my employment.
It's just me, SO and 18yo DS, so no small kids at home to entertain. We try to make the most of our time at home and play games, have zoom happy hours, and cook good meals.
BUT, I just feel that I am near my breaking point and am just one more thing away from losing it. I can't turn on the tv or read the news because it's just too much. I think maybe I just need a good cry, and then I can continue on.
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Post by gillyp on Apr 9, 2020 17:10:54 GMT
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Post by JoP on Apr 9, 2020 17:42:51 GMT
lainey I so very sorry for your loss also - sending you
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Post by JoP on Apr 9, 2020 17:46:21 GMT
Thank you all for your very kind words - it means a great deal. I the peas
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Post by peano on Apr 9, 2020 18:13:00 GMT
I'm so sorry Lainey.
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Post by gar on Apr 9, 2020 18:19:09 GMT
ashley - haven't seen you here for a while, are you doing ok?
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Apr 17, 2024 20:57:52 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 9, 2020 18:40:25 GMT
I've held it together until today. I've been really busy with phone calls and arranging things, fighting for the immuno-compromised and for the struggling families with EBT cards as their only form of payment for food.
Now today I'm finally faced with concern and worry over DH's chemo appointment for early tomorrow morning. He was denied getting chemo last week because his kidney function was too poor. We were hoping it was the remaining outcome of him just going through sepsis and 2 blood infections, a bad UTI and heart issues, but now we try again tomorrow.
If his kidneys are still not functioning properly, then he can't be a part of the chemo program and they'd want him to go right into major surgery (removing his bladder/prostate). It's a huge risk for him because he has so many other health issues/diseases. But now I'm freaked out that he'd be getting it done during this most dangerous health crisis, and I'm silently sad that I can't physically go to the hospital or his appointments with him. He has anxiety.
Praying for chemo tomorrow and taking it 1 step at a time. Everything else is okay with us in comparison.
Hope you all are doing well.
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Post by cecilia on Apr 9, 2020 18:45:57 GMT
I’m devastated and really struggling. I lost one of my longest and closest friends to suspected Covid-19 on Tuesday - I can’t stop sobbing and crying and it shouldn’t be like this, she was only 54 her granddaughter is not yet one. I can’t go and comfort any of them. Her two children were like my own as we never had children I am so very sorry.
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Post by JoP on Apr 9, 2020 20:59:09 GMT
@bergdorfblonde I hope chemo goes ahead tomorrow Thank you cecilia
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Post by destined2bmom on Apr 9, 2020 22:03:23 GMT
lainey and JoP I am so very sorry for your losses. I am sending prayers to both of you and your families.
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Post by compeateropeator on Apr 9, 2020 22:34:51 GMT
I am so sorry JoP on the loss of your friend. It sinks so much. I am so sorry for your and you husband‘s loss also lainey. Send hugs your way.
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Post by myboysnme on Apr 10, 2020 0:07:10 GMT
I live 5 hours from my 85 year old mom. She took a bad fall this morning and may have had a stroke. My brother listened to her all day about not going to the hospital but finally called the ambulance. I am hoping she gets in the ambulance. I know they won't let us be with her. She is one of the most stubborn, independent people I know.
Being 5 hours away is not a problem. I can leave anytime. But getting into Pennsylvania will be a big deal and then if I can't see her I feel like I should wait until we know more about what she needs. Right now I am just motivating my brother in dealing with her. I retired from my work as a hospital social worker in July and not only does the family rely on me, I am the one who normally takes over.
Here is where my selfish, stuck in the house warped mind comes in. I want to have our Easter as planned. If I can it means I can ignore that anything is wrong. I can pretend my mom is fine but at home. Anyway I'm waiting for word from my brother and posting on refugees.
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Mystie
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,299
Jun 25, 2014 19:53:37 GMT
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Post by Mystie on Apr 10, 2020 0:56:23 GMT
I’m devastated and really struggling. I lost one of my longest and closest friends to suspected Covid-19 on Tuesday - I can’t stop sobbing and crying and it shouldn’t be like this, she was only 54 her granddaughter is not yet one. I can’t go and comfort any of them. Her two children were like my own as we never had children I am so, so sorry. Love to you.
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moodyblue
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,166
Location: Western Illinois
Site Supporter
Jun 26, 2014 21:07:23 GMT
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Post by moodyblue on Apr 10, 2020 1:26:58 GMT
If DH didn't have cancer, we'd be ok. He is terrified he will need hospitalization. He doesn't do well there alone on a good day. I usually go home only to sleep. It's a real fear for both of us, as he is having issues eating. My sleep was helped by not watching any news after the dinner hour. I can understand the feelings. If my husband were still alive and still battling cancer, I would be a basket case worrying about him. He would be calmer, reading about the science of this all, because that’s the kind of thing he was fascinated by. My sympathies to all who have lost a loved one or can’t be with a loved one now. It’s hard and I lose it when hearing about people dying alone; it was so important to me that I be with my husband that I lived at the hospice house with him for the eight days he was there. I can’t imagine not being there, and have to try not to think about it. I am mostly okay. I am lucky in that I continue to be paid my salary as a teacher, and since I retire at the end of the school year, I will begin drawing my pension this summer. I can afford to pay for things for my brother, like his groceries and the prescriptions I've picked up for him. That relieves a little stress on him. I stocked up on basics early so I’m not stressed about finding toilet paper or Clorox wipes. I know that I am stressed though. I have nights when I don’t sleep well even though I’m tired and I find myself clenching my teeth a lot. I can cry very easily. My brother was supposed to have surgery on March 26, and we don’t know when it will happen now. It’s a huge concern as we don’t know if it’s cancer or not and while they think it’s contained to the kidney, will it still be when he is able to have surgery. And as a dialysis patient with autoimmune issues he is extremely high risk, as is his wife who is diabetic and has multiple health problems. My mom is 91 and in assisted living. We can talk to her on the phone but not visit. My aunt has been moved to skilled care and is not really doing well. My adult niece has cystic fibrosis. I have risk factors too and I cope by trying to make sure that I have whatever I would need to take care of myself at home. Being alone and sick would not be easy, but living alone means that I can more tightly control my environment. No one but me has been in the house for weeks, so I’m not obsessed with sanitizing all the time. I’m mostly okay with not going anywhere unless absolutely needed. I do work for school, text and email a lot, and when I’m outside I can talk to neighbors from a safe distance. We’ve had a couple days that were warm enough that I could sit on the screen porch and enjoy the fresh air. I get out in the sun when I can in my backyard or on the front porch.
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Post by kikitwo on Apr 10, 2020 2:57:17 GMT
My thoughts and prayers are with all of you. I was in line at a fast food place tonight. When I got to the window to pay, I was told the person in front of me had paid for my order. There are so many things we can’t change— but It just reminded me that we’re all in this together, and how much a simple RAK can change a person’s day. I hope we all have a better day tomorrow!
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denim
Shy Member
Posts: 49
Jan 29, 2018 2:36:55 GMT
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Post by denim on Apr 10, 2020 3:05:03 GMT
I am doing just ok. I am grateful to still be working from home full time. My company understandably deferred our 2019 bonuses, but it would have been nice to have that buffer. I don't know what the outlook of my company is though, so it is really stressful not knowing the future of my employment. It's just me, SO and 18yo DS, so no small kids at home to entertain. We try to make the most of our time at home and play games, have zoom happy hours, and cook good meals. BUT, I just feel that I am near my breaking point and am just one more thing away from losing it. I can't turn on the tv or read the news because it's just too much. I think maybe I just need a good cry, and then I can continue on. I just want you to know that it’s ok to to feel needy even if you don’t have kids or other dependants. Take care and be kind to yourself.
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QueenoftheSloths
Drama Llama
Member Since January 2004, 2,698 forum posts PeaNut Number: 122614 PeaBoard Title: StuckOnPeas
Posts: 5,955
Jun 26, 2014 0:29:24 GMT
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Post by QueenoftheSloths on Apr 10, 2020 3:10:03 GMT
I am feeling relieved to have gotten my trip to the store out of the way, and I feel good about the length of time we should be able to stay home after this. I did get officially laid off this week, which I was expecting, but it was still a blow. I won't be able to apply for unemployment until next Wednesday according to the rules on the website, and I'm not sure if I will qualify, since I have a second job. I also worry that the job I was laid off from will want to push us back to work before I feel safe doing so (in store data collection). The biggest thing that this has affected for us has been that we hoped to buy a home this spring. Now I don't know if we would still qualify, and there are so few homes coming on the market, plus all the logistics of home buying are further complicated by the situation.
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teddyw
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,794
Jun 29, 2014 1:56:04 GMT
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Post by teddyw on Apr 10, 2020 4:57:23 GMT
JoP I’m so sorry about your friend
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Post by JoP on Apr 10, 2020 5:57:53 GMT
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Post by Really Red on Apr 10, 2020 15:44:17 GMT
I’m devastated and really struggling. I lost one of my longest and closest friends to suspected Covid-19 on Tuesday - I can’t stop sobbing and crying and it shouldn’t be like this, she was only 54 her granddaughter is not yet one. I can’t go and comfort any of them. Her two children were like my own as we never had children I can't stop thinking about you. I think your friend would be so grateful her children have you in their lives. I know it doesn't help to hear it now, but they will need you. This disease sucks. I am so so sorry it has affected you like this.
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PLurker
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,735
Location: Behind the Cheddar Curtain
Jun 28, 2014 3:48:49 GMT
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Post by PLurker on Apr 10, 2020 15:54:16 GMT
I am so very sorry for your losses, @ainey and JoP Heartwrenching. This thing is hitting everyone somehow, there's no way around it, so ((hugs)) to all.
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Post by MalleyCat on Apr 10, 2020 17:08:27 GMT
Still can’t believe all of this is real and not a bad dream.....
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