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Post by Really Red on May 3, 2020 15:04:53 GMT
My DD is health-compromised, but otherwise young and healthy. Her cardiologist does not want her out at all and she has been in my house 8 weeks now. No outings except walking dogs. She lives in NYC. Her company has said Friday that is another 2 months before anyone will POSSIBLY go back to work. Her partner, who was unable to come down with her in early March is now able to come - and has been for some time, but didn't want to compromise my DD. Now that it looks like it's two more months, she wants to come. I had told her if she quarantines for 14 days, I'll drive and pick her up. I love her partner - having her here is not a problem.
So I am ready to do that. She is 400 miles away door-to-door. I am going to have to stop at least once on the way up and once on the way back (once if I am lucky and don't drink too much water). I am going up I-81 - not the NJ Turnpike.
Here are my questions:
Is it a better choice to drive up and get her and go in public bathrooms/gas stations than paying for a business class ticket (ETA: Amtrak) direct to my town for her? What do you think?
If she does come by train, does it matter that she quarantines 14 days? I mean she's at much, if not more risk than her trips to the grocery store.
I know people quarantine in the house. I do not believe it is possible to easily quarantine in my house, although it is possible. She has been SUPER diligent for 6 weeks now. Only going out for groceries and wearing a mask. Amtrak is only selling half their seats so she will not sit next to anyone on the train.
What are your thoughts? FWIW, I believe I have had COVID-19. I was in Europe in January and was extremely sick upon my return with similar symptoms of COVID-19. My cough was so bad I went to my doctor. I haven't been to a doctor for sickness in years and years (I go for my annual - that's it), that's how bad it was. I am not health-compromised.
UPDATE I have retrieved my daughter's partner. It was exactly 900 miles round trip (I got lost twice for about 5 mns). I left at 3:35am and got to NYC at 10:15am. I stopped once for gas and zero times to pee. I cannot believe it took me less than 7 hours to get to NYC. I have driven there twice in the past year and it was never less than 8.5 hours!! ZERO traffic the entire time to get there. In NYC I blew in and no cars. 95% of the people I saw were wearing masks outside and it was completely dead on a Saturday morning.
I went up into the apartment and got what they needed and took all their valuables. Oh and I peed! We headed home at 11:15 and we home by 6:05. There was a bit more traffic on I-81 (dang trucks in the left lane going up hills!), but we only stopped once for gas, switched drivers and did not pee either. We were SO SO thirsty when we got home. Honestly, it was SO much better than I thought and I felt very safe. I feel really happy having both of them here. I have to get used to my new normal, but it is good. I saw my son for the first time last night and we did a socially distant dinner. I was SO happy to see him and he looked great. I am hoping he'll be able to come home in June.
Thanks for all the help!!
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Post by freecharlie on May 3, 2020 15:10:26 GMT
I think the time of exposure would be less if you drove and got her, but in both cases there is threat of exposure.
I think I'd have her take the train, wear a mask and shower as soon as she got home.
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Post by cindyupnorth on May 3, 2020 15:15:33 GMT
Are they offering antibody testing in your area yet? for you to see if you had it? I think I would have her take the train. not sit next to anyone, mask, and when she gets to your house shower and social distance for a good 14 days. stay in a separate room, etc.
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Post by pierkiss on May 3, 2020 15:15:50 GMT
I think it would be safer for you to go and get her in your car vs having her fly on an airplane. You have no idea what other kinds of germs she’ll come into contact with on that plane. People who have the virus can often been asymptomatic, but still be shedding the virus. If that happens and partner picks it up, it could be catastrophic for your daughter. That wouldn’t be a risk I would be willing to take. I would rather brave a few community bathrooms along the way then put myself or a loved on in a tube with a bunch of people rebrew thing the same air for a few hours.
Besides, with the public restrooms, you can take precautions. You can wear your mask in and out. Wear gloves, bring in clorox wipes, wipe down the seat and the toilet paper dispenser. If you’re going to use the toilet paper cover, wipe that down before you pull one too. Do your business. Exit the bathroom, remove your gloves, wash hands REALLY well, dry them with paper towel if available (otherwise I’d dry once back in the car-they always say that the hand dryers circulate germs) and either use your elbow, foot, or another paper towel to exit the bathroom.
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gsquaredmom
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,092
Jun 26, 2014 17:43:22 GMT
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Post by gsquaredmom on May 3, 2020 15:31:52 GMT
I’d go get her. That’s only one or two potty breaks if you don’t have a lot of caffeine and water. Way more control over exposure than a train or plane. You could even wear depends diapers and maybe avoid stopping. Touch little, fast in and out, hand wipes or baby wipes, then hand sanitizer. Pack a lunch.
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Post by crazy4scraps on May 3, 2020 15:37:52 GMT
I’d go get her. You have more control over how much exposure you’d have doing things that way.
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Post by kiera on May 3, 2020 15:40:04 GMT
I live in NYC. I'd make the drive.
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Post by kitkath on May 3, 2020 15:57:47 GMT
Check the seat availability on flights, I don’t know if business class is even necessary. My daughter just flew and there were only 11 passengers on the plane and barely anyone at the airport.
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Post by MichyM on May 3, 2020 16:08:39 GMT
I’d have her rent a car and drive herself. After quarantining for 14 days.
My son and his partner did a 20 hr drive (in a day) 5 weeks ago when they left NYC. The only difference is that they quarantined for 14 days after arriving at their destination.
ETA: I would not suggest that she take public transportation of any kind unless she can fully quarantine on your end. A 400 mile drive can easily be done by one person in a day.
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Post by Really Red on May 3, 2020 16:10:32 GMT
I’d go get her. That’s only one or two potty breaks if you don’t have a lot of caffeine and water. Way more control over exposure than a train or plane. You could even wear depends diapers and maybe avoid stopping. Touch little, fast in and out, hand wipes or baby wipes, then hand sanitizer. Pack a lunch. HAHA HA. My DD wants to drive with me to get her. I told her only if she wore a Depends. That ended that quickly. UGH. I hate this! It sounds like driving is the better choice.
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Post by Really Red on May 3, 2020 16:11:40 GMT
I’d have her rent a car and drive herself. After quarantining for 14 days. My son and his partner did a 20 hr drive (in a day) 5 weeks ago when they left NYC. The only difference is that they quarantined for 14 days after arriving at their destination. ETA: I would not suggest that she take public transportation of any kind unless she can fully quarantine on your end. A 400 mile drive can easily be done by one person in a day. Yes, but's 800 miles round trip. We can share the drive on the way back, but it needs to be in one day. It will be long.
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Post by freecharlie on May 3, 2020 16:13:25 GMT
I’d have her rent a car and drive herself. After quarantining for 14 days. My son and his partner did a 20 hr drive (in a day) 5 weeks ago when they left NYC. The only difference is that they quarantined for 14 days after arriving at their destination. ETA: I would not suggest that she take public transportation of any kind unless she can fully quarantine on your end. A 400 mile drive can easily be done by one person in a day. I like the car rental idea Is it 400 miles round trip or one way? --you just answered this How long would she be on the train?
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Post by MichyM on May 3, 2020 16:14:11 GMT
I’d have her rent a car and drive herself. After quarantining for 14 days. My son and his partner did a 20 hr drive (in a day) 5 weeks ago when they left NYC. The only difference is that they quarantined for 14 days after arriving at their destination. ETA: I would not suggest that she take public transportation of any kind unless she can fully quarantine on your end. A 400 mile drive can easily be done by one person in a day. Yes, but's 800 miles round trip. We can share the drive on the way back, but it needs to be in one day. It will be long. Perhaps I wasn’t clear. If she drives herself it’s 400 miles according to your OP, is that correct? That’s an easy to do drive alone in a single day. DS and his partner did just that. Rented a car in the city and drove (20 hours) to the mid-south.
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TankTop
Pearl Clutcher
Refupea #1,871
Posts: 4,831
Location: On the couch...
Jun 28, 2014 1:52:46 GMT
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Post by TankTop on May 3, 2020 16:15:55 GMT
I would also see about renting a car and having her drive herself.
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Post by Basket1lady on May 3, 2020 16:18:51 GMT
I would go and get her.
DD a is flying here in 2 weeks. We are debating picking her up in Amsterdam (2 hours) vs taking the train into Brussels. I think there is more exposure on a train because it isn’t disinfected between each passenger.
And if your DD is that at risk, her partner needs to self quarantine for 14 days, or from the day of her last outing in NYC. I just bought a microwave yesterday for DD a to self quarantine. But that’s the law here.
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Post by christine58 on May 3, 2020 16:19:14 GMT
Honestly..I would not hesitate to fly..call me stupid but Southwest just sent me what they are now doing..there's hardly anyone on any flights. Wipes, masks, hand sanitizer....
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Post by cindyupnorth on May 3, 2020 16:26:13 GMT
400 miles in one day is a lot. Plus you would need to stay a night, sleep, and then drive back the next day. Correct?
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Post by angieh1996 on May 3, 2020 16:26:16 GMT
400 miles is easy for one person. I’d have them rent a car and drive to you. I’d rather risk a few bathrooms along the way that I can control vs being stuck in an enclosed area with people I don’t know.
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AgnesDeux
Full Member
Posts: 217
Jul 7, 2014 0:50:46 GMT
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Post by AgnesDeux on May 3, 2020 16:27:33 GMT
We are about to do the same and I am having all the same questions. My daughter is completing grad school and moving back here while she tries to find a job. Her dad and brother are going to get her. It's a 700 mile trip each way. While I am not crazy about this idea, I have suggested they stop somewhere on the way up making it a two day drive up so that my husband isn't totally depleted. My DD is afraid to come back because my elderly mother lives with us and she's afraid she will give the virus to my mother. DD has been quarantining since mid-march with only the occasional trip to the grocery store.
I am reading the responses for ideas!
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Post by freecharlie on May 3, 2020 16:31:15 GMT
We are about to do the same and I am having all the same questions. My daughter is completing grad school and moving back here while she tries to find a job. Her dad and brother are going to get her. It's a 700 mile trip each way. While I am not crazy about this idea, I have suggested they stop somewhere on the way up making it a two day drive up so that my husband isn't totally depleted. My DD is afraid to come back because my elderly mother lives with us and she's afraid she will give the virus to my mother. DD has been quarantining since mid-march with only the occasional trip to the grocery store. I am reading the responses for ideas! dad, brother, and daughter all need to quarantine for 14 days when they get back. Or can you figure out how to quarantine your mom safely?
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 7, 2024 1:26:52 GMT
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Post by Deleted on May 3, 2020 16:31:26 GMT
We did something similar when we moved DS back and it is a really hard drive. Between rest stops, food and gas, we must have stopped at least 10 times and it took us about 16 hours round trip. Does she have a mask, gloves, wipes and hand sanitizer? If so, I think with less people flying, I’d have her use all of that and fly back, quarantining her when she arrives.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 7, 2024 1:26:52 GMT
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Post by Deleted on May 3, 2020 16:36:06 GMT
400 miles is easy for one person. I’d have them rent a car and drive to you. I’d rather risk a few bathrooms along the way that I can control vs being stuck in an enclosed area with people I don’t know. What would the cost of a one way car rental be compared to other ways. Could she rent a car one way and make the drive using minimal stops with extreme caution?
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Post by nlwilkins on May 3, 2020 16:38:11 GMT
400 miles in one day is not bad - renting a car to drive down would be my suggestion. Two weeks ago hubby moved younger daughter up here in one day - it is 220 miles from there to here. So they drove over 400 miles and loaded furniture on trailer to boot in one day. Hubby is 78 years old and a cancer patient but he handled it easily.
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momto4kiddos
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,153
Jun 26, 2014 11:45:15 GMT
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Post by momto4kiddos on May 3, 2020 16:42:10 GMT
Only option that i'd be considering would be going to get her.
The train puts her in public at the station, then on the train for however many hours. A car rental i'd possibly consider, but ds worked in car rentals last year. They turn those cars over within a matter of hours on a normal day. This was in a city that really didn't have travel rentals. Mind you now they might be quite a bit slower...but i'm not sure of my comfort level with it.
Going to get her gives you the most control. You can plan for minimal exposure...quick fill up and pee break, sanitizing well.
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Post by elaine on May 3, 2020 16:45:15 GMT
I agree with having her rent a car and drive down herself, followed by a self-quarantine at your house.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 7, 2024 1:26:52 GMT
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Post by Deleted on May 3, 2020 16:45:56 GMT
400 miles is easy for one person. I’d have them rent a car and drive to you. I’d rather risk a few bathrooms along the way that I can control vs being stuck in an enclosed area with people I don’t know. What would the cost of a one way car rental be compared to other ways. Could she rent a car one way and make the drive using minimal stops with extreme caution? We had to rent an SUV to move all of DS’s stuff back. I considered flying there and renting a car for the drive back, but it was expensive to rent in one location and return in another. Also, you’d still need to get yourself to the car rental, sanitize the vehicle as much as possible, make several gas stops, and then deal with the return. When we tried to return the vehicle, we discovered that the rental place we picked up from had closed it’s doors and we had to scramble to find another location a few cities away so there may be fewer locations open now too.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 7, 2024 1:26:52 GMT
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Post by Deleted on May 3, 2020 16:49:27 GMT
400 miles in one day is not bad - renting a car to drive down would be my suggestion. Two weeks ago hubby moved younger daughter up here in one day - it is 220 miles from there to here. So they drove over 400 miles and loaded furniture on trailer to boot in one day. Hubby is 78 years old and a cancer patient but he handled it easily. 400 is definitely doable, but it’s actually 800 miles...400 each way.
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Post by christine58 on May 3, 2020 16:54:30 GMT
Amtrak...seriously....800 miles round trip in a day by car??NOPE...she can sit alone, wear a mask, take a shower upon entering your house and then take precautions once there. After more thought...that's what I would do...
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Post by gar on May 3, 2020 17:12:39 GMT
I would have her drive to you, in a rental car, no question.
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Post by leftturnonly on May 3, 2020 17:20:34 GMT
I deleted my original post as my first impulse would be to drive up and get her.
But now, I'm not so sure that would be best for you. If she could take tight precautions and rent a car, that may be the best answer.
Make sure she knows to wipe down any gas pump she needs to use. I read about one COVID patient who determined that was the only point of contact he had where he could have caught the virus.
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