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Post by mnmloveli on Feb 25, 2021 2:48:29 GMT
HOW DO YOU STOP A DOG FROM BARKING IN YOUR FRONT YARD?
Put him in your backyard!
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Post by mnmloveli on Feb 25, 2021 15:09:54 GMT
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Post by mnmloveli on Feb 25, 2021 20:38:09 GMT
WHAY DID THE DOG SAY WHEN HE SAT ON SANDPAPER?
Rough! Rough!
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Post by mnmloveli on Feb 26, 2021 0:24:24 GMT
How do snowmen greet each other?
Ice to meet you!
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Post by mnmloveli on Feb 26, 2021 15:06:06 GMT
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Post by mnmloveli on Feb 26, 2021 20:21:10 GMT
What’s a good winter tip?
Never catch snowflakes on your tongue until all the birds have flown south for the winter.
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Post by mnmloveli on Feb 27, 2021 0:48:28 GMT
I’VE BEEN PLAYING GOLF A LONG TIME AND THOUGHT I KNEW ALL THE GOLF TERMINOLOGY, BUT WHAT’S A RIDER A rider is when you hit the ball far enough to actually get in the golf cart and ride to it.
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Post by mnmloveli on Feb 27, 2021 15:53:26 GMT
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Post by mnmloveli on Feb 27, 2021 19:41:34 GMT
WHO ARE FROSTY’S PARENTS ?
Mom and Pop-Sicle!
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Post by gramasue on Feb 27, 2021 23:19:17 GMT
An elderly couple were having an old friend of the husband over for dinner. The two men were sitting in the living room talking while the wife was in the kitchen preparing the meal.
Making conversation, the old man says to his friend "We went to a really nice restaurant the other night. The food was wonderful!"
The friend asks "What was the name of the restaurant?"
The old man scratches his head and says "Oh, I can't quite remember. Um, what's the name of that red flower?"
The friend ventures a guess - "Carnation?" "No, that's not it" says the old man.
"What about tulip?"
"Nope, that's not it, either."
The friend, getting frustrated, says finally "How about rose?"
The old man gets excited and shouts "Yes! That's it!"
He then turns towards the kitchen and yells out "Rose, what was the name of that restaurant we went to the other night?"
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Post by mnmloveli on Feb 28, 2021 15:44:02 GMT
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Post by mnmloveli on Feb 28, 2021 21:31:53 GMT
What did the snowman order at Wendy’s?
A Frosty.
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 1, 2021 15:53:28 GMT
Try to have a restful and peaceful Monday !
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Post by gramasue on Mar 1, 2021 16:08:46 GMT
The Proper Way to Call a Golfer a Bastard
A guy was getting ready to tee off on the first hole when a second golfer approached and asked if he could join him. The first said that he usually played alone, but agreed to the twosome. They were even after the first two holes. The second guy said, "We're about evenly matched, how about playing for five bucks a hole?" The first guy said that he wasn't much for betting, but agreed to the terms. The second guy won the remaining sixteen holes with ease. As they were walking off number eighteen, the second guy was busy counting his $80.00. He then confessed that he was the pro at the neighboring course and liked to pick on suckers. The first fellow revealed that he was the Parish Priest. The pro was flustered and apologetic, offering to return the money. The Priest said, "You won fair and square and I was foolish to bet with you. You keep your winnings." The pro said, "Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?" The Priest said, "Well, you could come to Mass on Sunday and make a donation of $80. And, if you want to, bring your Mother and Father along, I'll marry them."
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 1, 2021 23:26:42 GMT
I’VE BEEN PLAYING GOLF A LONG TIME AND THOUGHT I KNEW ALL THE GOLF TERMINOLOGY, BUT WHAT’S A RIDER A rider is when you hit the ball far enough to actually get in the golf cart and ride to it.
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 2, 2021 14:21:54 GMT
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 2, 2021 23:27:26 GMT
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 3, 2021 14:26:28 GMT
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 4, 2021 0:34:39 GMT
WHY DO MELONS HAVE TO GET MARRIED IN CHURCHES?
Because they cantaloupe !!!!
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 4, 2021 17:09:52 GMT
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Post by gramasue on Mar 4, 2021 18:06:10 GMT
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 5, 2021 14:50:37 GMT
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PLurker
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,738
Location: Behind the Cheddar Curtain
Jun 28, 2014 3:48:49 GMT
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Post by PLurker on Mar 5, 2021 20:21:28 GMT
True story. Backstory, my eldest has a new kitty cat that neighborhood kids found abandoned in a parking lot and took to them. No one claimed it. They also have a 4 (?) year old neighbor who LOVES the kitty and they play together like besties. The cat was found on black Friday and is called "Friday" now. The kid's mom shared/texted a conversation this morning between "Boy" and his "Dad". (and then it was shared with me, knowing I'd appreciate)
Boy: What day is today? Dad: It's Friday. Boy: No, Friday ran up a tree. Dad: Oh, no! Boy: It's ok. Friday came back down again. (giggle)
Pretty good for a little kid on the right day to share, right?! Wonder how long he was thinking about that one. LOL
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 6, 2021 17:57:40 GMT
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 7, 2021 17:22:37 GMT
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 7, 2021 21:24:11 GMT
WHAT KIND OF MONEY DO SNOWMEN USE AT THE NORTH POLE? Cold cash!
WHAT DID THE ICY ARTIC ROAD SAY TO THE TRUCK? “Want to go for a spin?”
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 8, 2021 23:01:25 GMT
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 9, 2021 14:56:50 GMT
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Post by mnmloveli on Mar 9, 2021 22:30:45 GMT
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Apr 25, 2024 22:26:28 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 10, 2021 4:41:01 GMT
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