"You've got this!"

I think there are some people who can find toxicity in nearly anything. And those who see it in almost nothing. I personally don't find that I use that phrase in day to day life very much, but it's certainly NOT because I find anything negative about it myself. It just doesn't happen to be a phrase that's caught hold in my brain.

I think any positive saying can fall flat if said at the wrong time, and perhaps that's what's happened to this phrase from time to time. But in most situations, I think of it as being well-meaning and encouraging.

Sure, if your boss just dumped the work of 3 people on you, smirked, and said "You got this!" as they walked off, that would be different. But if said with sincerity, I think one should at least see it as intending to be encouraging, even if they don't personally feel that way about it.

I don't think it's toxic, but I don't use it. It kind of rubs me the wrong way. Upon reflecting why, I think it can be perceived as presumptive and perhaps underestimates the struggle or challenge. Maybe you don't "got this". Saying "you got this!" while well-meaning, seems trite.

I think the phrase “you’ve got this” is generally stated in a positive and encouraging manner. For example, it’s the kind of thing you might say to a friend who has been training hard for a 5k run and confides in you the day before the race that she is nervous. If she has trained hard and is looking to you for encouragement, I don’t see how saying “you’ve got this” could be considered toxic.

Like any phrase, it could come off as negative or toxic in certain circumstances. For example, if a friend was telling you that she felt like she needed professional help to deal with mental illness and you said “you don’t need help, you’ve got this,” then in that context the phrase would be negative.

There was a lot of "you got this"-ing during the gymnastics events at the Olympics. (This is why I can't play team sports. I don't like to yell "you got this" or "let's go".) I think they probably meant it along the lines of "you do this every day in practice, you can do it today too". I think if people are looking to get offended, they can find offense in anything.

People have become more aware of potentially toxic positivity through the pandemic, as so many were tasked with the ridiculous and impossible to keep society going. When people would mention that they were stressed, overwhelmed, depressed, etc. to someone who was working or staying comfortably at home, the response “You got this” is incredibly tone deaf.

Healthcare and education get/got those kinds of toxic encouragements a lot. Working the equivalent if two jobs with no budget? “You got this!” Dealing with angry patients/parents? Tired of working long hours for low pay? “You’re not in it for the money, right? You all make such a difference!” Tired of putting yourself at risk while half the country acts like there is no pandemic? “You all are heroes!”

So a lot of it is simply time and place. “You got this” is appropriate for a friend or child needing a little encouragement in a normal situation. To someone articulating real problems and expressing anger and frustration about them, it’s dismissive and rude. We need to start validating each other’s concerns instead of dismissing them.

I also find it patronizing and dismissive.

I really only say it during baseball games. But I’m having a hard time seeing it as negative.

I never say this phrase so my opinion is limited. But I didn't think about this aspect of it until you said this. truth, sometimes we absolutely don't "got this." And no matter how hard we might try we don't. But unless someone is a complete 24/7 whiner I think that maybe you're right. The person is trying to express a concern and we should listen.

Holy shit now I can't say "You got this" to encourage my DS during a golf tournament? Not something I will be getting my undies in a wad over.

I agree with it being over used and really not helpful like said above. Esp with healthcare this year.

I agree with cmpeter. I do not like this phrase.

I have thought about this so often. I wonder what the kids who experienced this trauma of Covid upsetting their little worlds will be like as adults due to what they went through.

I don't hate the phrase "you got this!" but I don't love it either. It's not something I say, mainly because when it has been said to me, it sounds dismissive. Like others have said, when you are telling someone about something you are going through or worried about and the person says, "you got this!" it does feel like they are blowing off whatever I am trying to tell them I am feeling.

Recently, my coworkers and I had to video tape a long training workshop that we normally teach live. I hate being in front of a camera, and I was nervous about it. I know the material like the back of my hand because I've been teaching my workshops for years. The day I was recording, I told one of my coworkers I was nervous, and when she said You got this! I took it in the spirit of encouragement she meant it. To me that is different than having someone say it to you when you are upset about something.

I am not a person who gets easily offended, and I often read threads here where people talk about things people say that upset them and think how that wouldn't bother me at all. But for some reason, this one bugs me. Maybe because it is so overused, it has just become a rote thing to say? I don't know.

I don’t think anyone is saying that, rather most are saying that it depends on the situation. Those that only specified that they found it dismissive, etc…how would that term apply in your situation? IMHO you’re ‘safe’ to use it as you are.

It might be cultural because I say it to amblet all the time and we encourage each other that way. There may be whining involved especially if she doesn’t want to do something like get up for a night shift but we use it for positive encouragement.