quiltz
Drama Llama
Posts: 7,086
Location: CANADA
Jun 29, 2014 16:13:28 GMT
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Post by quiltz on Jul 6, 2022 19:30:36 GMT
The mom stated this is the lifestyle they chose to live and love it, roughing it out in the woods like the old days. That is my biggest hang up I am having trouble wrapping my brain around and caused me to be snarky to the mother when she confronted me. When asked what I tell my kids why they lived the way they do she said I should of said nothing instead of poor.Telling my kids (12&15) they were poor was and easier to explain why they use a 5 gallon bucket as a toilet and stack the buckets outside the shed. I don’t fault their children at all and when at my place I let them bake cookies, swim in pool, use the internet and eat anytime they are hungry which is ALOT. When they stay the night at our house on sweltering nights, no toothbrushes come down nor night clothes. I don’t know what the answer I’m looking for. I want to scream at them to take care of their kids and my actions yesterday took away refugee from the heat and food for those kids and any contact with anyone for them also as they homeschool so the kids get no interaction with the outside world. I’m just sad about the world and how some people choose to live it. Well, this is an awkward situation. The bold part would have been ideal. Maybe ask your children to ask the mother? IDK If the mom did state that this is their chosen lifestyle, then the mom shouldn't really be sending her kids to your place to swim, eat and be in an air conditioned house as these things are not part of their chosen lifestyle. I would be friendly but I would ease up on the the visits and such. I would talk to the mom and say that you don't want to intrude on the way she has chosen for her family to live and that as much as you don't understand their lifestyle, it is the one, they have chosen. IT is too bad for the children, as they see your lifestyle so much nicer. What part of the US do you live in that allows for such living conditions? curious. I would call Social Services or Child Protection, simply so that someone who has some authority knows about this living situation. I would be very concerned about the sewage situation and how it gets into the groundwater. This issue, especially in hot weather could cause disease, such as e-coli. The Health Department should know about this way that waste-water is being disposed of. Not sanitary.The reasons that there have been issues with (for example) romaine lettuce being recalled due to e-coli is mostly due to the conditions of the field and the way that waste-water, sewage has been not properly disposed of. The waste gets into the groundwater and the romaine absorbs these bacteria while the plant is growing. Rain usually forces the waste into the ground and the ground is possibly tilled and then planted. This is a very difficult situation. I can tell that your heart is good and you want to help but really, please do not let this family become co-dependent on you, possibly having you letting them enable you to provide the food, cold air, creature comforts that most of us take for granted, as the mother told you that this is not part of their "life-style". |
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Post by peasandthanku on Jul 6, 2022 19:45:22 GMT
First off, I am glad you second guessed yourself and thought to ask others. I think it must be tough to hear so many people tell you they feel you were in the wrong.
Secondly, I used to be "poor". I use brackets as I had a house to live in but let me tell you, I scraped by for food and paying bills...I was left as a single mom of 2 under 3 and pregnant with a third but I was too proud to go on welfare and so I struggled. By the grace of God and good friends, I made it thru.
I can remember a friend dropping off groceries out of the blue one day and when she left, I sat in a heap and cried.
After reading your post, I would have been absolutely mortified if she had told her kids I was poor. I would have been even more mortified if she told me to my face she thought I was poor.
I honestly believe kids should not have been told this, regardless of their ages - poor is not a kind word. To tell your kids that they are not as fortunate as you are is one thing, but you already know their wages are not below poverty so I'm not sure why you would think they are poor. I do feel you need to apologize to both the mom and your children even if it doesn't heal the friendship, just make it right. As a previous poster said, now is the time to show your kids that adults make mistakes too.
Just my opinion and I applaud you for taking the time to reflect.
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Jul 6, 2022 19:49:37 GMT
I would be very concerned about the sewage situation and how it gets into the groundwater. This issue, especially in hot weather could cause disease, such as e-coli. The Health Department should know about this way that waste-water is being disposed of. Not sanitary.she did say in the OP that they have some sort of septic system. It may not be as unsanitary as we are assuming it is.nevermind- she wrote 'no indoor plumbing, electric, or septic.' I mis-read it. |
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Gem Girl
Pearl Clutcher
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Posts: 2,686
Jun 29, 2014 19:29:52 GMT
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Post by Gem Girl on Jul 6, 2022 20:23:14 GMT
I don't generally post before reading all the responses, but, if nobody has said this yet,
Cooking indoors on an outdoor grill can be fatal.
That's a huge, immediate concern! The niceties of discussions can be dealt with after that stops.
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Post by freecharlie on Jul 6, 2022 20:23:49 GMT
Yes. Whether the off-grid living was really a choice or brought about by poverty, the actual living conditions are cause for concern. It’s not the fact that they live in a shed and there’s no electricity and indoor plumbing. It’s the fact that they use an outdoor grill indoors and poop buckets. Do they have adequate ventilation? Are they disposing of the waste properly? There’s also no running water, so how is proper hygiene for the kids provided? Is there a well? All unknown. I’m not saying OP was right in how she dealt with the neighbor, but just from what’s been said, there is legitimate concern. I agree. Also, that this is a separate issue from whether the interactions between the kids and blueberry and the neighbors made her ask whether she was the asshole. If I were sincerely concerned for the children’s welfare (which sounds valid), the last thing I would do is support my teenage kids (who are both old enough to understand and know better than shoot their mouths off so cruelly) in being demeaning to the other children, nor would I get in a shouting match with the mom telling her how poor I think she is. So, yeah, I would be concerned for their welfare (all of them) and call whatever CPS (child protective services) is in their state. If for no other reason than that would hopefully ensure the children weren’t being neglected and that a social service agency would ensure that they had resources available if poverty, rather than choice, is the issue. Regardless of the underlying cause, hopefully having social services agencies involved would remedy the living conditions to make them safe at a minimum. The other issue - the one the OP asked about - is her family’s behavior. Again, I would be mortified at my family’s behavior (including myself). Because, again, there but for the Grace of Uncle Sam go I. Showing empathy and compassion is exponentially more important than “telling it like it is.” Anyone who thinks that “honesty” is a virtue in this- and many - cases doesn’t understand that honesty is a virtue when applied to judging and speaking about oneself and one’s own behavior, not necessarily judging and speaking about others. @littleblueberry, please turn that honesty inward and look at your own behavior. When the peas are pretty much unanimously telling you that you were the ass, it may be worth it, rather than doubling down on your behavior. For this issue, it doesn’t matter whether they are truthfully poor, your and your teenagers’ “honesty” was cruel. Is that how you want to live your life? Being cruel to others and dressing it up as “honesty?” Is that what you want your kids to be? for once, I read most of the thread and Elaine said it very well. As a mandated reporter, I'd be calling and I would let the authorities determine if it was a safe environment or not. That doesn't mean the op wasn't an ass |
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Post by crazy4scraps on Jul 6, 2022 20:34:11 GMT
FWIW, the OP did mention that they were using a propane camp stove indoors which is actually dangerous and could cause carbon monoxide poisoning. Just saying. The propane stove still doesn’t justify what the OP and her kids have said to this family. It may be true that they are poor but there were much better wars of handling that question. If I found out one of my children said that I would not only be mortified but pissed. They would have all luxuries taken from them and they can see what being poor feels like. My youngest is 10 so much younger than your children and she would absolutely have no electronics, the bare minimum for clothes and shoes, no snacks, etc. TBH I don’t even understand how it was even a question as to whether your behavior or your kids behavior was acceptable. Unbelievable. I agree with you on the behavior aspect but my post here was more commenting in response to the person I quoted who was basically saying, so what if that’s how they choose to live? No one is in danger living without modern conveniences. My point was, using a propane camp stove indoors is in fact, very dangerous and can even be deadly. My DH and a friend were doing some vehicle repairs once in a mostly closed garage in the wintertime using a propane heater. The big overhead door was open a couple feet and they thought that would give enough ventilation. I was hanging out in there with them while they were working, and I passed out on the floor likely from CO poisoning. They quickly got the garage door open and got me outside into the fresh air. Thankfully nothing happened other than I got a wicked headache and was really tired. Being the smallest of the three of us though, I was essentially the canary in the coal mine. If I knew someone was using something like that inside a poorly ventilated area where there were kids living and sleeping, I probably would call CPS. |
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Post by crazy4scraps on Jul 6, 2022 20:47:00 GMT
As long as there is ventilation - which I am guessing there is in this shed, even if it is unintentional due to lack of tight fitting windows and doors - actually cooking with propane indoors can be safe. you reminded me of something- my DH's grandparents have a cabin in the woods on some property in WI (built in the 1950s, I think), and the refrigerator and stove both run on propane. (granted, there was that one year a mouse nest in the refrigerator ventilation thingamajig caused us to have headaches till they found and cleaned it, but... other than that we've never had problems when we stayed there.) The difference is that those appliances are *designed* to be used indoors. They are designed to be vented to the outside whereas a camp type stove is not which is why using one even in a somewhat ventilated area can be very dangerous. Read my post above about how I passed out cold in a semi ventilated garage. It’s the same thing. |
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Post by cmpeter on Jul 6, 2022 21:49:11 GMT
Until the 7th grade we grew up off the grid. It was a choice my mom made to be independent when she was poor and also a lifestyle choice. However, we lived on acres of property, had running water, functional indoor propane appliances and a functional outhouse (no buckets). Even after she connected to the grid and we got an indoor toilet, she still powered most of the house with solar or wind energy. It wasn't until retirement that she moved to a fully on-grid lifestyle (condo in Florida). I remember babysitting the summer of 7th grade for a family that didn't have running water, but a hand pump on their deck and you had to carry water inside. They did have electricity, they just hadn't had time to run the water lines inside.
I learned at an early age (probably 3rd grade) that this wasn't a normal way to live. However, the area we lived in had many families/hippies who lived the same way or even more rustically. It wasn't until the townies started to tease me that I really knew there were other lifestyles and being poor was something to be ashamed of.
There are still plenty of folks in the area where I grew up that choose to live off the grid today. Either by choice or for financial reasons. It's not as uncommon as some folks might think. Head up to rural Northern California and see for yourself.
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Gem Girl
Pearl Clutcher
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Posts: 2,686
Jun 29, 2014 19:29:52 GMT
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Post by Gem Girl on Jul 6, 2022 21:57:20 GMT
It wasn't until the townies started to tease me that I really knew there were other lifestyles and being poor was something to be ashamed of. There are still plenty of folks in the area where I grew up that choose to live off the grid today. Either by choice or for financial reasons. It's not as uncommon as some folks might think. Head up to rural Northern California and see for yourself. There's no shame in being honest & poor. I'm sorry the "townies" were unkind. Nobody knows what his lifestyle status will be tomorrow, and judging people based on their financial status is shallow. |
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Post by quinlove on Jul 6, 2022 23:09:11 GMT
My kids have been friends with the neighbors behind us for about two months now. My kids are heart broken as living in the country they are the only kids close in age for a distance. I believe this is her main objective here. She only wants to mend this so her own kids can hang out with these kids. Before you can fix this with the neighbors, you have to start by fixing your own house ! First things first. This is a perfect example for you to parent your children to be kind and understanding. once you get your own house in order - you can proceed from a place of positivity. |
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Post by KiwiJo on Jul 6, 2022 23:11:32 GMT
………. There are still plenty of folks in the area where I grew up that choose to live off the grid today. Either by choice or for financial reasons. It's not as uncommon as some folks might think. Head up to rural Northern California and see for yourself. May I briefly de-rail the thread?…. I love it when someone suggests we explore a particular area - I’ve just spent some interesting time exploring parts of rural Northern California on Google maps street view. Fascinating and interesting area, very rugged I think, and sparsely populated. I can see lots of evidence of apparently low-income living, with old wooden housing, rusting cars in the front yard etc, but in amongst it all are some real gems. A tumble-down cottage with peeling paint, and a gorgeous wreath hanging on the front door. Another with some bird feeders hanging from a tree. Another with bright cheery flowers planted along the front. Surely people making the best of what they’ve got! I also explored a small town - Happy Camp - and came across Kingfisher Market with a whole wall full of lovely painted art work. A wooden building indicating it was a hotel established in 1858 across the road from an Arts Council building. In a town of less than 1000 people - how wonderful is that! Sorry for the de-rail. Now back to the previously programmed thread…… |
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Post by lesserknownpea on Jul 7, 2022 1:23:45 GMT
I spent a lot of time being poor, I knew I was poor. I wasn’t too proud to admit it, the pride was that I worked like a fiend to make sure my kids were clean and fed. I feel like I’m the only person here that feels poor isn’t an insult, just a fact.
Obviously, the mom in question definitely considered it an insult, and the OP got hot headed and held her previous kind acts over her head, which, I’m sorry, was not well done.
I do know for a certainty, if you, OP, hope to repair this relationship, calling CPS will end that in a hurry. I’m not saying don’t do it, if they are living as described, you must. But no proud parents, “choosing” to live the way you describe, will appreciate authorities nosing around, and they will think you did it in a vengeful way after the argument.
Also, sadly, some people live like that because they are hiding and don’t want to be found. How much do you know about these people?
I think there is a lot to consider here, and you have truly received enough criticism for one thread. I know you care for these kids and were caught off guard, and I imagine you would handle things differently if you could.
And please, do update us on any developments.
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Sarah*H
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by Sarah*H on Jul 7, 2022 1:43:26 GMT
Without disclosing too much information, I had a client who risked losing custody of their child to CPS because of their refusal to have water and sewage at their home. It was primarily a lifestyle choice and they were beyond livid at the government interfering in their personal freedom in that way. (Using they/them for privacy purposes.) CPS intervened after mandated reporters at the school called about the terrible personal hygiene of the teenage child who was doing the best they could under the circumstances.
So while I agree that you should not have responded in the way that you did, this situation is very concerning from a child welfare perspective.
ETA: I would also agree - my client was definitely living that lifestyle for a reason and while they weren't truly off the grid, there was a lot going on that definitely would and did raise red flags when authorities got involved because this teenage child came to live with them and they were enrolled in public school. So that is something to consider about what may be going on with your neighbors. I feel like it is unlikely you will call Childline and honestly, I'm not sure about where you live and what is considered acceptable anyway so a lot of this child welfare advice may be pointless. We like to pretend to ourselves that things in this country can be neatly managed by the authorities but the reality is that if you want to go underground and live off the grid in the way this family seems to be doing, there are a lot of places where it is possible to do so.
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Post by librarylady on Jul 7, 2022 1:51:37 GMT
We were poor. Not living in a shed poor but the kind of poor that comes with having a house full of children and then the father becomes disabled. We were on a farm so we were well fed. Our pick up was old, we wore hand-me-downs etc. One day Mom was giving a neighbor's child a ride to a school function and the child asked, "Are you poor?" My mother replied, "We are poor in some things but very rich in the things that count." (The child asking was about age 8)
My mom went on to tell him that we had plenty of love and people who cared.......and all those things that do count, but not material goods.
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Post by revirdsuba99 on Jul 7, 2022 2:14:15 GMT
Has no one listened to Dolly Parton?
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Post by Linda on Jul 7, 2022 4:39:31 GMT
I spent a lot of time being poor, I knew I was poor. I wasn’t too proud to admit it, the pride was that I worked like a fiend to make sure my kids were clean and fed. I feel like I’m the only person here that feels poor isn’t an insult, just a fact. I also don't feel poor is necessarily an insult either - certainly I've been poor at times in my life - but I think there are enough people in our society who equate poor with ignorant, lazy, not trying, uneducated etc... that certainly there are times and situations where it can be and is used insultingly. And whether the OP intended offense or not, it appears her neighbour took offense |
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Deleted
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Aug 18, 2025 21:30:08 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 7, 2022 10:47:39 GMT
YTA I am having a hard time grasping that in this situation, what you’re most concerned about is that your kids don’t get to play with these kids anymore. I think you’d be better off worrying about what you’re teaching your kids and how they’re treating others. I don’t think you have any right to feel like the aggrieved party here. This family is obviously having a very difficult time and they thought your family cared about them and had befriended them. Instead, they discovered you talk down about them behind the their backs. Such a good point. I’m surprised you have reached the age of parenthood without understanding that blatant honesty can often be unkind and inconsiderate, but it’s time for you to learn it now. Tact and thoughtfulness is a skill to embrace and teach your children; even very young children understand that it’s not nice to say certain things to people. I don’t know if you can repair this with an apology, but you owe them one anyway. As a parent, I wouldn’t want my children in the company of a family who was unkind to them in this way. |
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Post by teddyw on Jul 7, 2022 12:01:13 GMT
I get it’s their choice but it’s not their children’s choice. Those kids are old enough to realize most people don’t live this way.
At the HS I sometimes work at there are families whose utilities are shut off. So no bathing or laundry can be done. My office has a shower in it. They allow these kids to come in early to clean up. The principal keeps a closet full of all size clothes that they can borrow. He also washes their clothes for them because there’s a washer & dryer.
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Post by mom on Jul 7, 2022 13:33:54 GMT
YTA I am having a hard time grasping that in this situation, what you’re most concerned about is that your kids don’t get to play with these kids anymore. I think you’d be better off worrying about what you’re teaching your kids and how they’re treating others. I don’t think you have any right to feel like the aggrieved party here. This family is obviously having a very difficult time and they thought your family cared about them and had befriended them. Instead, they discovered you talk down about them behind the their backs. Thank you for saying this. I couldn't put my finger on what specifically made me so upset, but this. This is it. The whole situation is bad but this is what bothers me the most. Im certain they feel betrayed by a friend when they were already struggling. |
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Post by Lexica on Jul 7, 2022 17:57:13 GMT
I hope you have read all of the responses and accept that you were very unkind to this family. It is probably not possible to repair the friendship, but you do owe them a sincere apology. You need to humble yourself and admit that you were in the wrong.
I am equally concerned about the poor example you are setting for your own children. You say you live in an area where there are no other kids for yours to hang out with. You also homeschool so they don’t have the opportunity to make friends at school. If you don’t have a heart-to-heart with your kids and admit that you were very wrong and very cruel in talking about this family in the way you did, I fear they will never develop the skills needed to create long term friendships for themselves. You need to model compassion and charity to your kids. You can’t want them to grow up acting superior to others and saying hurtful things to them. Just because you currently have air conditioning and more things than this family certainly does not make you better people. Use your need for honesty on yourself and be a better person. Your supercilious attitude is teaching your kids the wrong message. I think they also need to offer the family a sincere apology. Maybe have them write a letter to the family?
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Post by librarylady on Jul 7, 2022 17:59:04 GMT
The OP and her children need to write a letter of apology....
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Post by heckofagal on Jul 7, 2022 18:13:58 GMT
I would say yes, you are somewhat of an ss. Its not right to ever make someone feel 'poor'. I would not have used that word to describe them to my kids. I would say "some people are less fortunate with the things they have...and we have been fortunate in our lives so we are going to invite our neighbors for a cookout...or a playdate ...or whatever it is. And as far as the neighbor asking if you thought they were poor...you never know what circumstance they have come from. Maybe she fled an abusive husband and a year ago they were completely homeless and had nothing. However, it does not sound like she is making the best choices either. And I wonder how the health department would feel about her 'choices'. |
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Dalai Mama
Drama Llama
La Pea Boheme
Posts: 6,985
Jun 26, 2014 0:31:31 GMT
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Post by Dalai Mama on Jul 7, 2022 18:18:03 GMT
The OP and her children need to write a letter of apology.... Personally, I think a letter is a cop-out. She needs to prostrate herself to this woman in person. |
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Post by papersilly on Jul 7, 2022 18:29:19 GMT
i think what burns me about this, too, is that the kids' friendship was severed through no fault of their own. the "poor" kids are already doing without a lot of basic things in life. losing friendship and not getting to hang out with other children is just another kick to the gut.
by and large, i don't think kids really care about the economic circumstances of other kids. kids are just kids. they just want to be part of a pack, feel like they belong, and just play and hang out. there will be plenty enough time in their adult life for that "they are poor" bullshit. they don't need it as kids.
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zella
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by zella on Jul 7, 2022 19:39:09 GMT
I have been poor. Really poor. And homeless. With two very young children. Through no fault of my own. A kind answer to the question might be "No, I suspect you've had some hard times... it's been rough for a lot of people these last few years." That acknowledges that they may be wanting but not because of anything they've done wrong, not suggesting you are better than they are, and that they are one of many. It leaves them with their dignity. That answer wouldn't have bothered me at all. You don't need to tell your frank truth; it helps no one.
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Deleted
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Aug 18, 2025 21:30:08 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 7, 2022 21:34:36 GMT
I spent a lot of time being poor, I knew I was poor. I wasn’t too proud to admit it, the pride was that I worked like a fiend to make sure my kids were clean and fed. I feel like I’m the only person here that feels poor isn’t an insult, just a fact. Obviously, the mom in question definitely considered it an insult, and the OP got hot headed and held her previous kind acts over her head, which, I’m sorry, was not well done. I do know for a certainty, if you, OP, hope to repair this relationship, calling CPS will end that in a hurry. I’m not saying don’t do it, if they are living as described, you must. But no proud parents, “choosing” to live the way you describe, will appreciate authorities nosing around, and they will think you did it in a vengeful way after the argument. Also, sadly, some people live like that because they are hiding and don’t want to be found. How much do you know about these people? I think there is a lot to consider here, and you have truly received enough criticism for one thread. I know you care for these kids and were caught off guard, and I imagine you would handle things differently if you could. And please, do update us on any developments. Thank you for being kind in your judgment of me. I fail it explaining everything well. The mother has spoke to me quite a bit about their views and why they chose this life. If someone tells you they no longer can go to the laundry mat because of funds and wash clothes outside with a plunger how can you yell at them for answering a question about being poor. My kids have came home telling my that they used to live in a big house with a pool but they didn’t want that no more and want to know why someone would chose to give it up to live like they do. I thought I picked the lesser of two evils by answering with poor instead of the truth. Their beliefs of the world collapsing because of democrats. My children are compassionate regardless of what the Peas think. Never making the kids feel lesser. Heck I tried my best to do that for the mom. We had an RV cook stove and refrigerator we gifted them, all the out grown Gymboree clothes I had saved for quilting, all the spare lumber we cut from our sawmill. Thier children were here 5 days a week some times coming at 9am and spending the night on average 3 days a week. Thier land including ours comes from a land company with in house financing. You know your getting raw land with nothing on it. You are told there is no water available and you with have to haul it in or pay to have a well drilled. To get electric hooked up you must have a septic system. They got the land and a rent to own shed to live in when Trump lost the election because according to them, shit is going to hit the fan. They have chickens, rabbits and now two pigs to provide food for when it happens. And dogs for protection. I forget when I write something people assume the norm. Oh chickens must have a chicken coop, Nope. Just running around the property. Rabbits are in cages nailed to trees and the pigs are running around because no electric for a fence. I wish I was making this up. She disclosed her husband makes 23 dollars an hour and he is provided a company van he brings home everyday. The land and shed cost them 700 a month again disclosed by her. Plenty to rent a small house in the area. If you look up the Nauglers, that was a CPS case in this country and the results. If I called they would know it was us and not a can of worms I want to deal with. |
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Post by revirdsuba99 on Jul 7, 2022 21:45:37 GMT
You just can't stop.....
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inkedup
Pearl Clutcher
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Jun 26, 2014 5:00:26 GMT
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Post by inkedup on Jul 7, 2022 21:46:25 GMT
I spent a lot of time being poor, I knew I was poor. I wasn’t too proud to admit it, the pride was that I worked like a fiend to make sure my kids were clean and fed. I feel like I’m the only person here that feels poor isn’t an insult, just a fact. Obviously, the mom in question definitely considered it an insult, and the OP got hot headed and held her previous kind acts over her head, which, I’m sorry, was not well done. I do know for a certainty, if you, OP, hope to repair this relationship, calling CPS will end that in a hurry. I’m not saying don’t do it, if they are living as described, you must. But no proud parents, “choosing” to live the way you describe, will appreciate authorities nosing around, and they will think you did it in a vengeful way after the argument. Also, sadly, some people live like that because they are hiding and don’t want to be found. How much do you know about these people? I think there is a lot to consider here, and you have truly received enough criticism for one thread. I know you care for these kids and were caught off guard, and I imagine you would handle things differently if you could. And please, do update us on any developments. Thank you for being kind in your judgment of me. I fail it explaining everything well. The mother has spoke to me quite a bit about their views and why they chose this life. If someone tells you they no longer can go to the laundry mat because of funds and wash clothes outside with a plunger how can you yell at them for answering a question about being poor. My kids have came home telling my that they used to live in a big house with a pool but they didn’t want that no more and want to know why someone would chose to give it up to live like they do. I thought I picked the lesser of two evils by answering with poor instead of the truth. Their beliefs of the world collapsing because of democrats. My children are compassionate regardless of what the Peas think. Never making the kids feel lesser. Heck I tried my best to do that for the mom. We had an RV cook stove and refrigerator we gifted them, all the out grown Gymboree clothes I had saved for quilting, all the spare lumber we cut from our sawmill. Thier children were here 5 days a week some times coming at 9am and spending the night on average 3 days a week. Thier land including ours comes from a land company with in house financing. You know your getting raw land with nothing on it. You are told there is no water available and you with have to haul it in or pay to have a well drilled. To get electric hooked up you must have a septic system. They got the land and a rent to own shed to live in when Trump lost the election because according to them, shit is going to hit the fan. They have chickens, rabbits and now two pigs to provide food for when it happens. And dogs for protection. I forget when I write something people assume the norm. Oh chickens must have a chicken coop, Nope. Just running around the property. Rabbits are in cages nailed to trees and the pigs are running around because no electric for a fence. I wish I was making this up. She disclosed her husband makes 23 dollars an hour and he is provided a company van he brings home everyday. The land and shed cost them 700 a month again disclosed by her. Plenty to rent a small house in the area. If you look up the Nauglers, that was a CPS case in this country and the results. If I called they would know it was us and not a can of worms I want to deal with. I'm not sure what anything you just posted has to do with how you treated this family. You and your children were rude and you continue to degrade this family in an attempt to excuse that. You gave them a camping stove, not kidney. Your attitude toward this is increasingly awful. |
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Aug 18, 2025 21:30:08 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 7, 2022 21:47:47 GMT
The mom stated this is the lifestyle they chose to live and love it, roughing it out in the woods like the old days.I’m just sad about the world and how some people choose to live it. do you really believe that people CHOOSE to live this way? especially if they have children? while i might believe it true for some people, i also believe that people will say things like this because they don't want to admit or explain the shame or embarrassment of their situation. parents who are struggling say stuff like that all the time. if you can't afford to eat out you say " home cooking tastes so much better than eating out". if you can't afford new clothes you say " these (used) jeans still have a lot of life in them and they are so cute!" god forbid, if you are homeless " it's an adventure". do you really believe they choose the thrill of shitting in a 5-gallon bucket to the comfort of a toilet that flushes and is in the house next to a sink with running water? how long do you think it took for the novelty of living outdoors to wear out and she had to spin the story to her kids? you saying you are sad about people choosing to live this way sounds so condescending. Papersilly, I know for a fact that this was a choice and in no way circumstances. I make alot of assumptions so I failed to include that land their family has just like ours by it is in house financed my Kentucky land company. You go in knowing it is raw land with absolutely no utilities. You are informed there is no water available at the road, so the choices is to haul water in or pay to have a well drilled. You can not get electric without having septic installed. They are doing a rent to own shed to live in. They chose to do this because Trump lost and believe society is going to collapse because their is a democrat in office. They need to insure they can survive when SHTF. So while living without electric, septic or running water they have acquired chickens, rabbits and now two pigs for a food source. The husband makes 23 an hour and drive the company van everyday. It is a choice. |
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inkedup
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,837
Jun 26, 2014 5:00:26 GMT
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Post by inkedup on Jul 7, 2022 21:49:13 GMT
do you really believe that people CHOOSE to live this way? especially if they have children? while i might believe it true for some people, i also believe that people will say things like this because they don't want to admit or explain the shame or embarrassment of their situation. parents who are struggling say stuff like that all the time. if you can't afford to eat out you say " home cooking tastes so much better than eating out". if you can't afford new clothes you say " these (used) jeans still have a lot of life in them and they are so cute!" god forbid, if you are homeless " it's an adventure". do you really believe they choose the thrill of shitting in a 5-gallon bucket to the comfort of a toilet that flushes and is in the house next to a sink with running water? how long do you think it took for the novelty of living outdoors to wear out and she had to spin the story to her kids? you saying you are sad about people choosing to live this way sounds so condescending. Papersilly, I know for a fact that this was a choice and in no way circumstances. I make alot of assumptions so I failed to include that land their family has just like ours by it is in house financed my Kentucky land company. You go in knowing it is raw land with absolutely no utilities. You are informed there is no water available at the road, so the choices is to haul water in or pay to have a well drilled. You can not get electric without having septic installed. They are doing a rent to own shed to live in. They chose to do this because Trump lost and believe society is going to collapse because their is a democrat in office. They need to insure they can survive when SHTF. So while living without electric, septic or running water they have acquired chickens, rabbits and now two pigs for a food source. The husband makes 23 an hour and drive the company van everyday. It is a choice. You're clearly confident in the fact that you weren't an ass, so why bother asking? |
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