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Post by peace on Jan 16, 2023 16:08:08 GMT
I would say it's fine to not have booze BUT you are having it at a nice restaurant in a big city for brunch. SO, if it was me- I would have bloody mary's or mimosas available and pay that tab. Bridal brunch and a little brunchy booze.
Good luck! And congrats!
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Post by peano on Jan 16, 2023 16:09:48 GMT
Somehow, this doesn't seem to be the demographic for this type of shenanigans. You wouldn’t normally think so, but there was a very good reason why every event surrounding my own wedding (including the showers) was bone dry. And while the person who couldn’t maintain self control wouldn’t start a brawl, she would absolutely get falling down drunk and create a scene so I speak from experience. I didn’t want to have to deal with any of that if I could help it. The last wedding I went to was my BFF’s DD. They had an open bar (which the groom’s family insisted on), the groom’s brother got absolutely trashed and literally started a fist fight with someone else at the reception. The police were called and the whole thing was shut down at 10:30. Definitely not what the couple wanted. Lord, what a nightmare!
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Rhondito
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MississipPea
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Jun 25, 2014 19:33:19 GMT
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Post by Rhondito on Jan 16, 2023 16:14:10 GMT
I would see if there's an option for mimosas. If not, forgo the alcohol or pick up the bar tab yourself.
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SweetieBsMom
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Jun 25, 2014 19:55:12 GMT
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Post by SweetieBsMom on Jan 16, 2023 16:15:58 GMT
I've been to a number of bridal showers. I've never attended on with an open bar. The ones I have attended showers at restaurants/halls, none have had open bar, there has been a bar available if people wanted to avail themselves of such beverages but open bar? Nope.
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Post by epeanymous on Jan 16, 2023 16:53:57 GMT
I’ve never been to a shower that served alcohol, not even mimosas. I don’t drink at all so maybe I’m biased, but I really don’t find it necessary for anybody to be drinking so early in the day, especially an unlimited amount from an open bar. Any time there’s an open bar it’s just asking for trouble IMO. There’s almost always someone who can’t control themselves who gets stupid drunk and creates a scene. The last couple weddings I’ve attended that had one ended with a brawl and the reception getting shut down early.Somehow, this doesn't seem to be the demographic for this type of shenanigans. Yeah, most of the weddings I have attended have been open bar and I have never seen anything like that at all. My dad was drunk at my wedding, but he was already drunk when he showed up. It is funny, the only wedding I ever attended where the family tried to organize around problem drinkers was one where the couple were heavy substance users so the father of the bride told the bartender that he could not serve drinks unless they were mostly juice/mixers (no martinis, but gin and tonics heavy on the tonic, eg). So the couple went and got high instead.
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Post by Prenticekid on Jan 16, 2023 17:12:57 GMT
I've never been to a bridal shower where alcohol was served. I never heard of anyone expecting alcohol or being put out that there was none. So basically, a non-issue.
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Post by scrapmaven on Jan 16, 2023 17:16:35 GMT
I had two very lovely bridal showers and no alcohol was served. We all had a great time, anyway. At lunchtime there's no need for alcohol, imho. If you want to serve mimosas, you could get a price quote on those, but honestly, coffee, tea and regular beverages should be enough. That's jmho, but I don't drink, so I'm not one to ask.
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Post by sean&marysmommy on Jan 16, 2023 17:39:16 GMT
Add me to the list of those who have never been to a bridal shower where drinks were served. I'm not a big drinker, either, so maybe that's a factor...but I'd never expect drinks at 12-3pm.
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Post by Merge on Jan 16, 2023 18:34:44 GMT
If you were going to make the guests participate in horrible bridal shower games, I’d say you need to liquor them up first. 😂
No really, I think carafes of mimosas on the table are sufficient.
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pilcas
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Aug 14, 2015 21:47:17 GMT
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Post by pilcas on Jan 16, 2023 18:41:01 GMT
I live in the rural south so I have never been to a bridal shower that served alcohol of any kind. ETA: Another thing to think about is that many attending may be driving themselves since I assume this is just for the women and not a couples thing. I suppose in DC, they may be using public transit but do you really want them to give them access to a lot of alcohol and then expect them to drive home? Honestly, just because there is access to a lot of alcohol does not mean people are going to over drink. I have gone to work retirement parties, holiday parties, weddings, baptisms, communions, etc where there was an open bar and people did not over drink and were perfectly capable of driving themselves home.
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Post by chaosisapony on Jan 16, 2023 18:49:22 GMT
I have never been to a bridal shower with an open bar. That just seems a bit odd to me. Here, bridal showers are generally in the morning/early afternoon and just have snack and finger foods along with soft drinks, juice and water for drinks. I've been to a couple of brunch showers at restaurants and there was no alcohol offered there either.
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Post by MsChiff on Jan 16, 2023 18:52:10 GMT
I don't think alcohol is needed at a bridal shower (or any shower, really) but I'm old. If most of the attendees are in their 30s, they'll likely be looking for alcohol with their brunch, not that it's necessary that you provide it. I like the idea of having one or two brunch-type drinks available or offering two drink tickets per person for the bar. I really don't think it's necessary to cover the cost of young people having unlimited drinks at a 3-hour brunch, especially at the price point you've been given. I think paying per drink could get pricey with that age group as shots can be a big thing and consequently the bar tab could rise quickly. I know someone in that age group that lives in Arlington and most of her social events include alcohol. While it's great that she Ubers almost everywhere, I think knowing that driving is not a concern very likely will increase alcohol consumption overall.
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Post by busy on Jan 16, 2023 18:53:50 GMT
I think paying per drink could get pricey with that age group as shots can be a big thing and consequently the bar tab could rise quickly. I don't know any 30somethings who do shots at brunch. Plenty of people have a drink or two with a meal or at a celebration and that's it. Most people don't drink to get drunk, especially not at something like a brunch shower.
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Post by justkat on Jan 16, 2023 19:03:42 GMT
In my circle a brunch shower at a restaurant...an open bar would not be expected. However having some type of "drink" such as a mimosa/bellini/bloody Mary etc would be. I'd speak with the restaurant and see what the options are as to no open bar but maybe having a single drink served (a specialty bloody Mary for example).
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Post by crazy4scraps on Jan 16, 2023 19:55:19 GMT
Somehow, this doesn't seem to be the demographic for this type of shenanigans. Yeah, most of the weddings I have attended have been open bar and I have never seen anything like that at all. My dad was drunk at my wedding, but he was already drunk when he showed up. It is funny, the only wedding I ever attended where the family tried to organize around problem drinkers was one where the couple were heavy substance users so the father of the bride told the bartender that he could not serve drinks unless they were mostly juice/mixers (no martinis, but gin and tonics heavy on the tonic, eg). So the couple went and got high instead. Yeah, there are a number of substance abusers on both sides in our family so we were trying to be proactive. If they were going to get drunk or wasted, it wasn’t going to be on my dime. Speaking of showing up drunk, that would be my brother at my DD’s first birthday party. He wasn’t even invited but another brother brought him along. While I was busy with something in the kitchen, the drunk one proceeded to stand DD up thinking she could walk (she couldn’t quite without assistance at that point) and the poor kid promptly did a face plant on the tile floor. 😬😢 Good times, good times.
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Post by MsChiff on Jan 16, 2023 20:11:48 GMT
I think paying per drink could get pricey with that age group as shots can be a big thing and consequently the bar tab could rise quickly. I don't know any 30somethings who do shots at brunch. Plenty of people have a drink or two with a meal or at a celebration and that's it. Most people don't drink to get drunk, especially not at something like a brunch shower. Good for you. I shared my opinions based on my experiences, particularly when the majority of attendees are younger, of the same age, and celebrating pretty much anything. Yours obviously are different but certainly not exclusive.
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Post by Zee on Jan 16, 2023 20:20:38 GMT
Brunch at a nice restaurant? I think mimosas would probably be expected by millennials in that setting. Not an open bar.
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Jan 16, 2023 22:12:53 GMT
The vast majority of people I know are quite responsible consumers of alcohol. It’s de riguer to offer an option for some sort of alcoholic beverage at virtually every social event I attend. If it isn’t offered, it’s fine but almost everyone does.
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Post by sideways on Jan 16, 2023 22:23:55 GMT
I’ve never been to a bridal shower with an open bar. I’ve been to many with mimosas, though. I think mimosas are nice to have, but not necessary. I certainly think an open bar is overkill. We went to a baby shower last week that had mimosa, beer, and hard seltzer. But, it was a co-ed shower.
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Post by compeateropeator on Jan 16, 2023 22:25:44 GMT
Another who thinks mimosas and Bloody Marys would be a wonderful addition with a brunch and if others wanted a different drink they could purchase from the bar. I have been to many showers with alcohol and do not find it strange to see it at a bridal shower…a baby shower probably not so common.
I think if you decide to forego the alcohol that is fine, but I think having it available to those who would like a drink is also a nice touch. I definitely do not think an open bar is necessary.
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Post by Sharon on Jan 16, 2023 22:38:12 GMT
I've never been to a shower with alcoholic drinks. I wouldn't expect them.
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peabay
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,891
Jun 25, 2014 19:50:41 GMT
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Post by peabay on Jan 16, 2023 22:59:16 GMT
The vast majority of people I know are quite responsible consumers of alcohol. It’s de riguer to offer an option for some sort of alcoholic beverage at virtually every social event I attend. If it isn’t offered, it’s fine but almost everyone does. Same here. I appreciate all the insights and I'm going to speak with the banquet manager tomorrow about possibly serving mimosas, bellinis, bloody marys and Prosecco. The open bar menu included all kinds of beers and mixed drinks - I agree with many of you who said that's overkill. Plus, I just don't want to spend that much!
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Post by Tamhugh on Jan 17, 2023 0:10:29 GMT
I have been to a lot of baby and bridal showers in the past several years. None of them had open bars. I hosted a bridal shower for my DIL and we had lemonade, iced tea, water, and a mimosa bar. Everyone seemed happy with that.
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peaname
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Aug 16, 2014 23:15:53 GMT
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Post by peaname on Jan 17, 2023 2:10:25 GMT
Save the alcohol for the wedding.
Assuming it’s not important to the bride.
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scrapngranny
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Jun 25, 2014 23:21:30 GMT
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Post by scrapngranny on Jan 17, 2023 3:44:11 GMT
I’d vote for the teas and coffees. You can offer a no host bar.
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mimima
Drama Llama
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Jun 25, 2014 19:25:50 GMT
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Post by mimima on Jan 17, 2023 4:10:39 GMT
Many more of the Bridal Showers have not served alcohol than have in my experience
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