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Post by epeanymous on Feb 27, 2023 1:03:43 GMT
My husband is out of town so I am stuck shepherding the family heritage project for a kid's elementary school assignment. Please tell me I am not the only person who hates these! I don't know who my bio father is, the father who raised me had actually zero living relatives except for his three children I found out about last year when he died, and my mother is estranged from her family, so that is mostly a dead end too. I wasn't raised religious and we had no cultural traditions in my home. I am literally making things up here! I did at least tell my kid to delete the part where I told him we were descended from the lost colony of Roanoke .
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Post by Merge on Feb 27, 2023 1:22:38 GMT
Oh good lord. Teachers need to stop assigning those things.
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Post by Delta Dawn on Feb 27, 2023 1:25:17 GMT
Science fairs are deadly, too.
Son’s father wants nothing to do with son and it was hard making him into a swell guy. Also his older brother thought they were descended from samurai. Yeah right. This was all a heritage project.🤦🏼♀️
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amom23
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,408
Jun 27, 2014 12:39:18 GMT
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Post by amom23 on Feb 27, 2023 1:28:57 GMT
My oldest had to do a family tree project in HS English class. His teacher said his wasn't complete enough. Sorry, but not all of us have neat family trees we can trace back to the Mayflower.
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Post by revirdsuba99 on Feb 27, 2023 1:37:13 GMT
I can, I can... (The Mayflower that is) Only found out a few years ago. My cousin did it, the research.
I really don't care either!! Mean nothing to me...
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Post by mcjunkin on Feb 27, 2023 1:46:09 GMT
Former teacher here who cannot believe they still assign things like this....... What about kids in foster care? ? How are they expected to complete stuff like this? ETA: or situations like...I had a first grader whose dad was also grandpa. No joke. How horrific for that child to have to answer those questions.
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Post by Linda on Feb 27, 2023 1:55:00 GMT
I'm a genealogist - I love researching...but I think it's terrible that schools continue to assign these - there are so many non-traditional families and situations like the ones mcjunkin cited...
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Post by ntsf on Feb 27, 2023 2:10:56 GMT
family tradition.. we don't share family history stories....
I'm with everyone. don't assign such crap assignments. make a family tree of elizabeth the second. or something
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Post by Butterfly Momma on Feb 27, 2023 2:23:34 GMT
Ugh, I hate those projects. They are right up there with mothers day and fathers day projects, as far as I'm concerned. I totally support recognizing mothers and fathers. But not in school. For Fathers Day 1986, I was the only 2nd grader in my school without a Dad. My dad was killed the previous fall. My teacher's response, when I politely asked to be excluded from making a fathers day card? To make one for my grandfather. Right. The one that died by suicide 15 months before my Dad. Blech. Almost 40 years later and I still remember how hurt I was.
I couldn't believe it when one of my kids came home with a mothers day project a couple of years ago. I loved my son's project for me, but my adult heart hurt so badly for any kid who didn't/couldn't/wouldn't want to make one.
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Post by chaosisapony on Feb 27, 2023 5:06:50 GMT
My oldest had to do a family tree project in HS English class. His teacher said his wasn't complete enough. Sorry, but not all of us have neat family trees we can trace back to the Mayflower. My worst experience with these ridiculous projects was in my high school AP English. We had to do a family tree and like your child's, mine wasn't complete enough. My maternal grandparents grew up together in an orphanage and my dad's parents had all died before I was born. My dad was very secretive with his heritage for some reason so I never met any of his relatives and didn't know more than a first name of one of his brothers. My teacher gave me an F and the class laughed at me when I made my presentation. I dropped the class the next day. There's just no reason to have these projects as part of the curriculum.
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snyder
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,294
Location: Colorado
Apr 26, 2017 6:14:47 GMT
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Post by snyder on Feb 27, 2023 5:38:28 GMT
Whem my son was about 6 years old, there was a little boy that wandered the neighborhood. One day son wanted him to come into the house to play. I asked him if he would go get permission from his mom to come into my house as I didn't want her looking for him and he be in my house and not hear if she called out for him. He told me I don't have mom. Wow! Taken back for a minute to rethink this questioon, I asked who he lived with. Right then and there I realized the world was changing and I'd better be careful how I spoke. I don't remember son having to do the heritage project, but grandson did and it really pissed me off. His mother decided she wanted to play and not be a family and neglected grandson big time. Was in the process of trying to get custody of him, when DHS called and said come get him and he's been with son ever since, so the mother issue was fresh in his life expereince and he didn't quite understand why she disappeared off the earth or why we couldn't get other information on her family.
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Post by underwatermama on Feb 27, 2023 5:38:29 GMT
Did they have to list a favorite family recipe too? I was smart enough to figure out that the next step in that was "make it and bring it to the heritage display day". Our favorite family recipe for all eternity is now "banana bread".
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anaterra
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,082
Location: Texas
Jun 29, 2014 3:04:02 GMT
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Post by anaterra on Feb 27, 2023 14:05:56 GMT
I few years ago... when oldest dgs was in kinder... dd had to go have a chat with his teacher because she made dgs cry... the class was making a craft for father's day and the teacher had written dad and daddy on the white board but dgs wanted to know how to spell mommy... teacher say nooo we made flowers for mommy last month.. we are doing daddy this time... dgs says i dont have a daddy... teacher says well lets make it for grandpa... and dgs says but i want to give something to my mommy!!! and teacher wasnt super happy about that... so he put for grandpa but gave it to his mom and told her about teacher not wanting him to make it for her... he does have 2 grandpas but he loves his mom most..
I am hoping teacher learned a serious lesson and stopped all that... let the kids make crafts for whoever they want... these days lots of kids have different family set ups... we are not in the old ages of traditional family situations... it is still something dgs talks about...
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seaexplore
Prolific Pea
Posts: 8,797
Apr 25, 2015 23:57:30 GMT
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Post by seaexplore on Feb 27, 2023 14:18:32 GMT
When I taught genetics in middle school I loved doing a family tree of traits. Many of my kids came from broken and incomplete family knowledge. I told EVERYONE that they could 100% make it up but it had to make sense. I asked for pictures cut from magazines for each “family” member. I have no idea who used their actual family and who made it up. It was an exercise in tracing genes and heredity.
If my kid was given a “heritage” project, I would 100% make that shit up. I’m a huge supporter of genealogy and find it very fascinating but no one understands another family and their specifics and you can’t ask a kid who may or may not have a Norman Rockwell family to do a project like this.
Our heritage recipe would be chocolate chip kahlua cake because I love it. Zero cultural background there.
I say make shit up and make it believable so they get a decent grade. I love the Roanoke part! 😂
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Post by Merge on Feb 27, 2023 14:49:10 GMT
It's nice to see that several here are able to see how ridiculous these projects are in this day and age. There will, of course, be a contingent in some areas who see getting rid of the project or changing it to honor different types of families as an example of the "woke left" getting its way. Nope, just basic human decency.
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Post by myboysnme on Feb 27, 2023 14:54:43 GMT
I had a long time patient when I was working as a social worker. He was literally named for the street he was found on and raised in a boys home. At age 18 he was taken in by the family whose mom worked in the kitchen at the boys home because he had nowhere to go. Soon he joined the military and stayed in for 20 years.
He used to make up family connections whenever there was a tragedy like he said he lost his niece in 9/11. When he died the only person he had was the long time friend from the boys home who volunteered there in college.
What family tree was he ever going to be able to do? These days dna tests could find someone, but back then there was no one.
Aside from that I love family trees and I think they can be a useful teaching tool if you do something like who is in your life rather than lineage
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Post by auntkelly on Feb 27, 2023 14:59:24 GMT
I’m still mad about my daughter’s B+ grade on her 7th grade Honor a Veteran Project. My daughter interviewed her 95 year old great great aunt who served as a nurse in WWII.
In her critique of the project, the teacher did not say a word about the fact that my daughter had found a female veteran of WWII to interview. Apparently, she didn’t find it the least bit interesting that my daughter’s aunt was the head nurse of an American hospital set up in England prior to the Normandy invasion for the purpose of treating American soldiers injured in the invasion. Nor did she find it interesting that my aunt accompanied General Eisenhower a few months after the invasion on a three hour tour of the hospital where he met every single patient and thanked them for their sacrifice.
The teacher didn’t apparently didn’t find it funny, that when my aunt was asked the obligatory question about whether she had won any medals for her service, she responded “Well I got the good conduct medal, but you had to be really naughty to not get one of those.”
The teacher’s only comment on the entire project was “Your essay was good, but the letters on your poster were a little crooked or I would have given you an A.
Of course, the only part of the project I helped on was to quickly put the letters on the poster board as my daughter finished writing the essay.
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iowgirl
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,276
Jun 25, 2014 22:52:46 GMT
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Post by iowgirl on Feb 27, 2023 15:27:42 GMT
I can, I can... (The Mayflower that is) Only found out a few years ago. My cousin did it, the research. Do you watch Finding Your Roots on PBS? Angela Davis was recently featured. Her ancestry was traced back to the Mayflower. The look on her face was ... well.. interesting. She was quite obviously upset about this. Angela Davis - Finding Your Roots
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Post by stormycat on Feb 27, 2023 15:37:08 GMT
It is so difficult sometimes. I have 4 children, just so happens my last 2 are adopted. They are 6 and 5. They were adopted from Foster care as babies, but still have trauma. They have both older abd younger siblings that they aren’t in contact with. Their Birth parents are convicted child abusers. I’ve told them about their adoption and little snippets, but they don’t know the whole story yet. One can’t cognitively grasp what it means and the other is so happy that I am his mommy.
Yes I know I could do the project based on my husbands and my family, as their my children in every sense of the world, but that’s not going to take away the hurt of the circumstances that brought them to me.
I’ve also fostered children of different backgrounds and cultures than my own. I would have adopted them as well if circumstances allowed. I can’t imagine telling a child that they had to do a project on family when it is obvious we are so different.
Some kids are ok with taking about their adoption and/or foster stories, I am not ok putting them in a position to make it so very traumatic for them.
For the record my kids teachers know that they are adopted and their background. Otherwise no one would probably know, my younger kids look more like me than my biological kids do.
Also in general I never refer to them as my bio or adopted kids, only for informational purposes for this post. I have 4 kids who I love and cherish. Although I do consider abd absolute privilege to be my younger kids Mommy, I’m sorry they had to go through horrific experiences to get to me, but they are the most wonderful little boys.
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Post by melanell on Feb 27, 2023 15:41:21 GMT
Hugs to you.
I'm a genealogist, and I still wish schools would stop assigning these projects. Sure, it was fun for me when my kids came home with them, but I can certainly imagine multiple reasons why they are NOT fun for others. I know one of kids' classmates was in foster care at the time when one of these projects came home, for instance.
Kids shouldn't have to share or explain their family/home situations. It's simply not necessary for that to be included in their education.
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Post by smalltowngirlie on Feb 27, 2023 16:04:52 GMT
Slightly off track, I think most activities centered around any kind of holiday should be eliminated. Loved when I worked for a program that said we cannot/should not do holidays. Loved it. If we talked about families, we talked about each family and how it was different from another.
I know where my descendants came from, but I think very little of what I do reflects that culture. I could have done the project, but it would not really have meant anything to me. I just really want to know the story of the picture of a racoon in a highchair.
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Post by littlemama on Feb 27, 2023 16:16:54 GMT
When ds had this project, pictures were required. Who the heck prints pictures anymore? Who has a printer anymore? I can see where these types of assignments would be difficult for anyone not in a tradtional family situation- even figuring out steparents, divorces, etc is too much for kids to sort out.
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Post by rymeswithpurple on Feb 27, 2023 16:34:57 GMT
I can, I can... (The Mayflower that is) Only found out a few years ago. My cousin did it, the research. I really don't care either!! Mean nothing to me... This is usually one of my husband's go-tos for the 2 truths and 1 lie ice breaker. He has a very Italian last name (his dad's grandparents emigrated here, so just a few generations back), but his mom could trace her lineage to the Mayflower. I just remember that family tree projects were a pain in the butt because my mom is one of eight kids, and they all have at least one kid, and my grandfather I think had 5 or 6 siblings?
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Post by gracieplusthree on Feb 27, 2023 16:49:42 GMT
Yes I always hated them. I don't know my bio mom, know nothing of her side. And never felt right putting the step mom info because, well. Step mom. But. What do you do.
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Post by revirdsuba99 on Feb 27, 2023 17:07:51 GMT
I can, I can... (The Mayflower that is) Only found out a few years ago. My cousin did it, the research. I really don't care either!! Mean nothing to me... .......but his mom could trace her lineage to the Mayflower. I just remember that family tree projects were a pain in the butt because my mom is one of eight kids, and they all have at least one kid, and my grandfather I think had 5 or 6 siblings? Yes that is a pain . When they came over there were many brothers and sisters. They each had many kids who married each other and they mostly named their kids the same names and it continued for several generations. I have one line that the husband had two wives, second after the first died, I am descended from both wives after many generations. Glad my cousin did it all.
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anniebeth24
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,716
Jun 26, 2014 14:12:17 GMT
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Post by anniebeth24 on Feb 27, 2023 17:58:28 GMT
Another hater here, mainly because I am an adoptive mom. Yes, my birth family is their family. However, the fact that my grandparents came from Wales has nothing to do with their story.
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RosieKat
Drama Llama
PeaJect #12
Posts: 5,538
Jun 25, 2014 19:28:04 GMT
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Post by RosieKat on Feb 27, 2023 18:11:39 GMT
We had the family heritage (like country of heritage), pilgrim dolls (representing an interesting ancestor), and of course good old genetics. Both kids were adopted. DD was only at that school for the genetics one, and her teacher just had her fill it out with us and her, which taught DD absolutely nothing about genetics.
For family heritage, we just told DS to pick a country of our heritage or of what we knew or suspected about his genetics (open adoption but uncertain paternity). That was fine because it correlated with summer Olympics and Usain Bolt was a big deal then, so DS went with Jamaica. Pilgrim dolls were kind of stupid, we picked a vaguely interesting ancestor off a branch of our family tree and DS just went with it, but again, it was weird. There was also a foster kid in his class, who made a slave ship and had his doll chained to it. (Second grade!) And his teacher during the year of genetics kept blowing him off when he tried to ask how he should do it, so DS just did it the way DD did - then the teacher said he must have done it all wrong. No wonder he has issues with school!
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Post by workingclassdog on Feb 27, 2023 18:27:29 GMT
Oh those school projects.. I never had to do any like that for my kid, but holy hell when science fair projects came home I literally wanted to crawl in a hole and die. Thankfully, DH 'chore' was science projects for about 80% of them. lol
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Post by Darcy Collins on Feb 27, 2023 19:29:26 GMT
I'm really shocked they're still doing them. It actually wasn't something I did growing up, but my kids did and the absolute only silver lining was that it sparked an interest in genealogy for me as we knew absolutely nothing about any family past my grandparents. They absolutely do not belong in schools and I'm honestly shocked they're still doing them - it must be so so hard for so many kids.
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Post by stampinisfun on Feb 27, 2023 20:12:30 GMT
My daughter did one of these when she was in the 8th grade. She came home upset. The kids called her a liar for having the Spain, Mexico, Central Africa flags on her poster. The other countries she had United Kingdom.Wales, Germany, Norway, Sweden, Russia, Ireland,Scotland the kids were okay with but the others they said she was lying because her complexion and dark strawberry blonde hair. They said there was no way she was telling the truth.She even told them my mom speaks Spanish and her relatives on her moms, mom side of the family are from there. I told her to be proud of where you come from and ignore the people who made her mad for doing what her teacher wanted done.
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