|
|
Post by librarylady on Sept 12, 2023 2:37:37 GMT
Longtime friend, who now lives several states away, husband has died. I attempted to send her a houseplant. I learned I had been scammed when I called a few days later to ask if the plant had been delivered. I didn't know where the service was being held, so sent it to her home. (coincidence: her sister who lives out of state was also scammed with no flowers being delivered)
Should I attempt another plant for her home--I thought I would call a local (to her) florist and ask if they would deliver to her home and order another plant?
Or should I just forget it at this point? Friend sent me a nice note today for the thought of the flower/plant even though it was never delivered.
side note: She and I met when we were age 10. We are now in our 70s but are still close. She told me once I was her 2nd sister, that is how she thinks of me.
|
|
|
|
Post by ntsf on Sept 12, 2023 3:03:07 GMT
I would call a local florist and just chalk it up to life otherwise..
|
|
|
|
Post by quinlove on Sept 12, 2023 3:20:26 GMT
I am going to try Benchmark flowers from Amazon next time. I’m sorry about your friend.
|
|
|
|
Post by Zee on Sept 12, 2023 3:34:15 GMT
Scammed? How did you order? How did you pay? Was it through a reputable company? Credit card? PayPal?
I'd want to know where either my money or her plant is.
|
|
snyder
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,330 
Location: Colorado
|
Post by snyder on Sept 12, 2023 4:04:13 GMT
I don't think I would send another plant or flowers, but maybe something she can use while she navigates her life now without her husband. When I had tough days, I liked to go for little drives, stop at a drive through coffee shop and then go sit and people watch, soak up the sun or watch the clouds or the leaves in the breeze. So if she likes coffee, buy a gift card for that or maybe a favorite drive though food place. I never wanted to go inside anywhere as I thought people were staring at me. Weird, I know.
I would still pursue your scam. Can you dispute the charge on your credit card?
|
|
|
|
Post by crazy4scraps on Sept 12, 2023 12:01:44 GMT
I’d file a dispute with the credit card company or however I paid. I wouldn’t just let it go.
|
|
|
|
Post by ScrapbookMyLife on Sept 12, 2023 12:04:01 GMT
I’d file a dispute with the credit card company or however I paid. I wouldn’t just let it go. I would file a dispute as well. |
|
|
|
Post by smasonnc on Sept 12, 2023 12:50:17 GMT
I just had the same thing happen. I contested it on my credit card and magically got a refund from the company. Now I Google a local florist and buy from them. When I had tough days, I liked to go for little drives, stop at a drive through coffee shop and then go sit and people watch, soak up the sun or watch the clouds or the leaves in the breeze. So if she likes coffee, buy a gift card for that or maybe a favorite drive though food place. This is a good idea. Sending a meal from a local restaurant might be good also. |
|
|
|
Post by mikklynn on Sept 12, 2023 12:51:40 GMT
I would not send flowers or a plant at this point. Even though we requested memorials, we still received many flowers and plants. That was fine, but it's another thing to have to deal with.
I'd plan time for a phone call with your friend. Set a specific time with her.
You can send her flowers later, saying you are thinking of her.
|
|
|
|
Post by librarylady on Sept 12, 2023 14:00:32 GMT
The letter to my CC company has already been sent. I anticipate that the charge will be removed.
I also sent in my payment with that amount deducted from the bill.
|
|
dawnnikol
Prolific Pea
'A life without books is a life not lived.' Jay Kristoff
Posts: 8,505
Sept 21, 2015 18:39:25 GMT
|
Post by dawnnikol on Sept 12, 2023 14:41:08 GMT
I’d send the plant with a note about maybe this one will make it. Might make her smile since she obviously knows you attempted sooner.
|
|
|
|
Post by scrapmaven on Sept 12, 2023 15:38:03 GMT
I don't think I would send another plant or flowers, but maybe something she can use while she navigates her life now without her husband. When I had tough days, I liked to go for little drives, stop at a drive through coffee shop and then go sit and people watch, soak up the sun or watch the clouds or the leaves in the breeze. So if she likes coffee, buy a gift card for that or maybe a favorite drive though food place. I never wanted to go inside anywhere as I thought people were staring at me. Weird, I know. I would still pursue your scam. Can you dispute the charge on your credit card? This is a great idea!
snyder, I'm sorry that you've had to face this loss.
Definitely fight the scam charges.
|
|
|
|
Post by littlemama on Sept 12, 2023 16:26:21 GMT
Id skip the plant as she is probably loaded up with them. Maybe send a gift card for a meal or for Door Dash?
|
|
|
|
Post by MichyM on Sept 12, 2023 16:31:30 GMT
The letter to my CC company has already been sent. I anticipate that the charge will be removed. I also sent in my payment with that amount deducted from the bill. I'm so sorry that you're dealing with this. Just a FYI, you can file a dispute online with your CC company, or call them if you'd prefer. I'd imagine it's a much quicker resolution than sending a letter. Food for thought. I like the idea of setting up a time for a phone call or Zoom with your dear friend. |
|
|
|
Post by Darcy Collins on Sept 12, 2023 16:32:45 GMT
I'd send something. I'd lean more to a food item. I've had muffins delivered or soups.
|
|
|
|
Post by lisae on Sept 12, 2023 19:08:30 GMT
I would definitely send the plant through a local florist. It's not her fault it never got there and she has sent you a thank you note. If you send her something else she is going to wonder if she should send yet another thank you note.
I would also dispute the charge with the CC company. These are two totally separate things as far as I'm concerned.
|
|
|
|
Post by papersilly on Sept 12, 2023 21:17:37 GMT
I am going to try Benchmark flowers from Amazon next time. I’m sorry about your friend. i didn't know you could buy flowers through Amazon! good to know. OP, if you feel like sending flowers again, maybe Amazon is an option. they have good customer service if things go sideways. |
|
|
|
Post by librarylady on Sept 13, 2023 1:56:44 GMT
The letter to my CC company has already been sent. I anticipate that the charge will be removed. I also sent in my payment with that amount deducted from the bill. I'm so sorry that you're dealing with this. Just a FYI, you can file a dispute online with your CC company, or call them if you'd prefer. I'd imagine it's a much quicker resolution than sending a letter. Food for thought. I like the idea of setting up a time for a phone call or Zoom with your dear friend. Chase bank wants all disputes in a letter, per the instructions on the back of their statement.
I am a bit of a cynic and think that it is a loop hole for them, but perhaps it is a way to create a paper trail and less likely to be overlooked in today's "paperless" society.
|
|
PaperAngel
Prolific Pea
Posts: 7,964
Jun 27, 2014 23:04:06 GMT
|
Post by PaperAngel on Sept 13, 2023 6:12:54 GMT
I recommend sending a donation in his memory to a charity/organization designated by the family in his obituary (or that you're aware your friend/her husband support) & request an acknowledgement be sent to his widow/your friend. ETA: The letter to my CC company has already been sent. I anticipate that the charge will be removed. I also sent in my payment with that amount deducted from the bill. I suggest paying the amount due in full; otherwise, you'll likely incur interest until the disputed charge is resolved (which may take several weeks). If the credit card company ultimately rules in your favor, then your account will be credited/the amount deducted at that time. |
|
|
|
Post by KelleeM on Sept 13, 2023 9:38:54 GMT
I may be in the minority but I don’t believe in sending a living item that needs to be nurtured and cared for to a grieving person. I still struggle to keep the plants I received almost 4 years ago when my husband died alive. And they stress me out.
I would have appreciated gift cards for food delivery or groceries. It was a horrible time in my life and, even with my adult daughter in my home, I had a really hard time with meals.
|
|
|
|
Post by mollycoddle on Sept 13, 2023 10:29:38 GMT
I’d file a dispute with the credit card company or however I paid. I wouldn’t just let it go. Yup. ^^^ And I am sorry about your friend. |
|
|
|
Post by crazy4scraps on Sept 13, 2023 11:32:08 GMT
I may be in the minority but I don’t believe in sending a living item that needs to be nurtured and cared for to a grieving person. I still struggle to keep the plants I received almost 4 years ago when my husband died alive. And they stress me out. I would have appreciated gift cards for food delivery or groceries. It was a horrible time in my life and, even with my adult daughter in my home, I had a really hard time with meals. I agree with you 100%. If we ever do send flowers, we always send cut flowers that can be tossed when they wilt. I also think that if the plants are stressing you out you shouldn’t feel obligated to keep them. I’d post them on a local Buy Nothing group and rehome them to someone who would love to have them. |
|
|
|
Post by KelleeM on Sept 13, 2023 13:26:34 GMT
I may be in the minority but I don’t believe in sending a living item that needs to be nurtured and cared for to a grieving person. I still struggle to keep the plants I received almost 4 years ago when my husband died alive. And they stress me out. I would have appreciated gift cards for food delivery or groceries. It was a horrible time in my life and, even with my adult daughter in my home, I had a really hard time with meals. I agree with you 100%. If we ever do send flowers, we always send cut flowers that can be tossed when they wilt. I also think that if the plants are stressing you out you shouldn’t feel obligated to keep them. I’d post them on a local Buy Nothing group and rehome them to someone who would love to have them. I’m hoping that my daughter will take them when she (finally) moves out! I have given some away as well. |
|
moodyblue
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,265
Location: Western Illinois
Site Supporter
Jun 26, 2014 21:07:23 GMT
|
Post by moodyblue on Sept 13, 2023 21:38:56 GMT
I always send flowers through a local-to-the-recipient florist. I’ve heard to many stories about the plant or flowers not being as advertised when ordered through some general company or service.
And, like some others, I do cut flowers rather than a plant in almost all cases. I, too, know the stress of trying to keep a plant alive when it was a memorial gift.
|
|
