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Post by epeanymous on Dec 1, 2023 0:02:26 GMT
It's rare that I have ever despised someone I don't know quite this much on someone else's behalf.
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Post by sabrinae on Dec 1, 2023 0:26:50 GMT
Hang in there. That timeline actually isn’t terrible, though I know it’s hard for you. Getting the forensic accountant’s report will make things go much more quickly as well. He’s horrible person. You will come out better in the end - you just have to get there
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kate
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Post by kate on Dec 1, 2023 0:40:31 GMT
Wishing you every good thing out of this mess - especially peace, but also a great settlement!
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MaryMary
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Post by MaryMary on Dec 1, 2023 2:14:35 GMT
I’m sorry this is dragging out for so long. Divorce is so incredibly difficult.
Every time my ex lies about something or takes me to court for something ridiculous, I remind myself that at least I don’t have to be married to that dude anymore. Divorce is literal hell, but now my life is soooooo lovely. It was worth a few years of misery to never have to see the Beavis again.
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scrappinwithoutpeas
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Post by scrappinwithoutpeas on Dec 1, 2023 2:24:39 GMT
Any chance he's trying to spend a $hitload in the hopes of declaring bankruptcy?
Glad you've got a good attorney and are documenting everything. Hang in there!
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teddyw
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Post by teddyw on Dec 1, 2023 2:27:53 GMT
I know this is tough but you can do it. I’m sure it’s hard to keep track of his bullshit but do it for your settlement. You deserve everything in your settlement.
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katybee
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Post by katybee on Dec 1, 2023 3:34:14 GMT
What a butthole. And you’d think if he was going all the way to the Philippines, he’d at least run a full marathon.
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Post by freecharlie on Dec 1, 2023 4:13:10 GMT
Ugh, I'm sorry.
I'm almost finally to the not having to care part and it is so nice. Mine just needs to pay the tax bill and then I don't have to give him any real estate in my mind.
I hope you get there soon.
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Post by Zee on Dec 1, 2023 4:21:08 GMT
I want to know: First, what does he do for a living that he can spend (and hide) so much money? I need a second career!
Second, why is he still bothering to lie to you about working or not? What an asshole. He ought to just man up, pay up, and let you move on. He's obviously not very interested in covering his tracks--feels like he's just spending money while he can.
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Post by hop2 on Dec 1, 2023 13:34:56 GMT
Hugs.
And, unfortunately, you’re going to need a span of time after to debrief and reprogram yourself from the control & gaslightng you’ve been dealing with. But you can do it. And you’ll be better off on the other side.
Hugs
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Post by mikklynn on Dec 1, 2023 13:45:53 GMT
I'm sorry he continues to be such an ass. I'm sending you all the love, Just T.
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Just T
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Post by Just T on Dec 1, 2023 16:21:13 GMT
Any chance he's trying to spend a $hitload in the hopes of declaring bankruptcy? Glad you've got a good attorney and are documenting everything. Hang in there! I don't think he is trying to file bankruptcy. I don't think that would look very good for his business. Besides, did I say he has a sh!t ton of money?? I can't see him having to file bankruptcy.
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Just T
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Post by Just T on Dec 1, 2023 16:23:17 GMT
I want to know: First, what does he do for a living that he can spend (and hide) so much money? I need a second career! Second, why is he still bothering to lie to you about working or not? What an asshole. He ought to just man up, pay up, and let you move on. He's obviously not very interested in covering his tracks--feels like he's just spending money while he can. He's an engineer. With a huge talent for design work. That is what he is making his money doing. I have NO idea why he continues to lie. It's ridiculous. I've told him lying about where he is and what he is doing is no longer necessary. LOL
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Post by lurker on Dec 1, 2023 18:53:10 GMT
Looking forward to the day when your divorce is final, the money is in your hands and you can spill all the details to your 2Ps friend ![;)](//storage.proboards.com/5645536/images/Q_m8lDOvc_3Le3r1GKdf.jpg)
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Post by Zee on Dec 1, 2023 19:02:18 GMT
I want to know: First, what does he do for a living that he can spend (and hide) so much money? I need a second career! Second, why is he still bothering to lie to you about working or not? What an asshole. He ought to just man up, pay up, and let you move on. He's obviously not very interested in covering his tracks--feels like he's just spending money while he can. He's an engineer. With a huge talent for design work. That is what he is making his money doing. I have NO idea why he continues to lie. It's ridiculous. I've told him lying about where he is and what he is doing is no longer necessary. LOL My husband is an engineer too but now he's just the boss, he doesn't design anymore. I'm going to tell him he needs to step up, I should be being kept in the style this man's running partner is accustomed to! Boy I hate this for you. Stay strong, vent here when needed, keep your head up. You're doing great. ❤️
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Just T
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Post by Just T on Dec 1, 2023 19:03:08 GMT
UGH I just found out a little bit ago that he didn't give the retainer to the forensic accountant like he was court ordered to do. He was supposed to have paid it by November 17, but he hasn't done it. ![:(](//storage.proboards.com/5645536/images/mYSUyHtG9Jrcmm_ydVcK.jpg) I'm not sure why I'm surprised. He is the one who has to pay for the forensic accountant because he keeps terrible business records and that is the only way to find out what he is worth so my attorney has an idea of what to work with as far as a settlement. I have thought that they were working on my case for the past two weeks, so I am feeling really frustrated now by this delay. NO way can I afford it, or I would pay it myself because I know how important this is.
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Just T
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Post by Just T on Dec 1, 2023 19:06:11 GMT
My husband is an engineer too but now he's just the boss, he doesn't design anymore. I'm going to tell him he needs to step up, I should be being kept in the style this man's running partner is accustomed to! My husband never made the kind of money he makes now. Not even close. It's just the last two years since he started his own company. He really is talented at design work, and he actually has a few bigger companies as clients. I know this is true because I have seen things in his bank records that my attorney now has and has shared with me.
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Post by librarylady on Dec 1, 2023 19:06:55 GMT
I am sure he is not paying because he knows what will be found.
Is there a way the court can force him to pay the accountant?
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Post by Bridget in MD on Dec 1, 2023 19:10:36 GMT
UGH I just found out a little bit ago that he didn't give the retainer to the forensic accountant like he was court ordered to do. He was supposed to have paid it by November 17, but he hasn't done it. ![:(](//storage.proboards.com/5645536/images/mYSUyHtG9Jrcmm_ydVcK.jpg) I'm not sure why I'm surprised. He is the one who has to pay for the forensic accountant because he keeps terrible business records and that is the only way to find out what he is worth so my attorney has an idea of what to work with as far as a settlement. I have thought that they were working on my case for the past two weeks, so I am feeling really frustrated now by this delay. NO way can I afford it, or I would pay it myself because I know how important this is. dammit! isn't that contempt of court? ![???](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/huh.png) ?
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Just T
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Post by Just T on Dec 1, 2023 19:17:45 GMT
Is there a way the court can force him to pay the accountant? I have no idea. This morning, my attorney filed a Motion to Compel with the court. I have no idea what happens if he doesn't pay, though. It's also the first of the month, which is when the temporary alimony is supposed to be deposited to our joint account, and it hasn't been yet.
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Just T
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Post by Just T on Dec 1, 2023 19:19:07 GMT
dammit! isn't that contempt of court? ![???](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/huh.png) ? Seems like it would be. I guess he's been too busy traveling the world.
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Post by librarylady on Dec 1, 2023 19:27:45 GMT
Is there a way the court can force him to pay the accountant? I have no idea. This morning, my attorney filed a Motion to Compel with the court. I have no idea what happens if he doesn't pay, though. It's also the first of the month, which is when the temporary alimony is supposed to be deposited to our joint account, and it hasn't been yet. Unfortunately you are the one suffering because of his actions, however, when he is finally before the divorce court judge all these inactions won't go well for him.
He has to be back in the US for the authorities to get their hands on him, but a little jail time is what usually convinces someone to comply with court orders.
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quiltz
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Post by quiltz on Dec 1, 2023 19:55:37 GMT
Just T ~~ And then sometimes they come right back into your life without warning. My ex came to my building (very secure) and gave an envelope to my Super to give to me. There was no note but a cheque with a decent sum of money. The exact $ amount that he had refused to pay me when he sold something that belonged to both of us. Maybe he's guilty or ![:confused:](//storage.proboards.com/5645536/images/gFcgIuKyZogcCNuz36nO.jpg) . Then he calls our child to ensure that I got the envelope! This man doesn't know the meaning of the word discrete. I told my son that I received the envelope. Nothing more or less. Didn't mention what was in the envelope. So, now my son is wondering what is going on and the people in my building are wondering why my ex simply didn't buzz me and hand the envelope to me in person. That's okay. I have 6 months to deposit the cheque. He never was good at bookkeeping. Perhaps by March he will have forgotten and then the cheque bounces and he gets excessive bank charges. I don't want his money. OR I will deposit the cheque remotely and he won't be able to get the cheque back. The glory of internet banking.
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Post by librarylady on Dec 1, 2023 20:06:27 GMT
quiltzI would cash it because "money in the hand..."
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Post by Lurkingpea on Dec 1, 2023 20:22:40 GMT
Just T ~~ And then sometimes they come right back into your life without warning. My ex came to my building (very secure) and gave an envelope to my Super to give to me. There was no note but a cheque with a decent sum of money. The exact $ amount that he had refused to pay me when he sold something that belonged to both of us. Maybe he's guilty or ![:confused:](//storage.proboards.com/5645536/images/gFcgIuKyZogcCNuz36nO.jpg) . Then he calls our child to ensure that I got the envelope! This man doesn't know the meaning of the word discrete. I told my son that I received the envelope. Nothing more or less. Didn't mention what was in the envelope. So, now my son is wondering what is going on and the people in my building are wondering why my ex simply didn't buzz me and hand the envelope to me in person. That's okay. I have 6 months to deposit the cheque. He never was good at bookkeeping. Perhaps by March he will have forgotten and then the cheque bounces and he gets excessive bank charges. I don't want his money. OR I will deposit the cheque remotely and he won't be able to get the cheque back. The glory of internet banking. Deposit the check now. If you don't want to money donate to a charity. Woman's shelter, Planned Parenthood, ASPCA...
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maryannscraps
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Post by maryannscraps on Dec 1, 2023 22:03:29 GMT
You’re incredibly strong and will weather this. Eventually it will all be settled and you won’t have to deal with this stress. Hopefully you’ll have the kind of luck my sister had. Her scumbag ex told the judge that she shouldn’t have any part of his business, that it was speculative and that it would be a fair trade for him to keep all the shares and she could have the house (with about 100k of equity.) The judge said, nah you owe her 50% of your shares in the business. His business had a freaking IPO on the NSE about a month later. She’s set for life now. She sold all her shares and hoped it made his drop in value.
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Post by lucyg on Dec 1, 2023 22:25:19 GMT
Hang in there. It WILL be over with eventually, and he’ll be mad about all the dumbass things he’s done that will just piss off the judge.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Dec 2, 2023 1:40:31 GMT
Hang in there, Just T. Karma is coming for him and will bite him in the ass HARD.
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