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Post by mammajamma on Aug 5, 2024 10:04:37 GMT
I sometimes give on Go Fund Me’s if I feel a connection, usually for something unforeseen in their life. I can think of 3 times I have in the last 3 months. Two of the three times were people I didn’t know but I had some shared mutual connection to the family. Twenty years ago, the outreach may have looked like taking them a meal, sending flowers, offering to help mow their yard or something. But now, it’s easier to just send money, and honestly it is probably better use of the recipient’s energy than to be left with 15 casseroles that they can’t fit in their fridge.
When I went through chemo 7 years ago, someone set up a meal train for our family. My kids were 2 and 6, and it really helped our spirits greatly. It was fun to visit with some people when they dropped off food. We were not in a financial bind, but it was very much appreciated. I don’t hear of meal trains as much now. More Go Fund Me. Maybe that’s just me, but I can also see how people now are less likely to want to eat something made in someone’s home, we are less connected society, people are so busy.
I have had the thought that Go Fund Me seems to being used to mitigate the need for things Life Insurance, long term/short term disability. I wonder if some people are buying less insurance now. We are not, but there are a lot of Go Fund Me pages now.
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Post by littlemama on Aug 5, 2024 10:13:14 GMT
I think they are over used and most don't adequately explain why the donation is being requested.
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artbabe
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Post by artbabe on Aug 5, 2024 12:02:30 GMT
I've donated quite a few times.
Sometimes I read a news story of something really horrific and I donate. Usually it is something with an animal or child involved.
I've had several students die and I contributed to their families.
An ex-coworker's house burned down and they lost everything.
I guess I am a soft touch. I have seen them used for the dumbest purposes but I just don't contribute to those. Some people have a lot of nerve.
I'm not going to victim blame if someone doesn't have life or medical insurance. I think saying "they should have known better" isn't helpful and you don't know the particular circumstances of someone's life.
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Post by lilacgal on Aug 5, 2024 12:26:09 GMT
I had a friend set one up for me after brain surgery. We made sure to set aside a percentage to pay for taxes. It definitely helped with all the bills and unpaid time off. It was/is a legitimate need. We had a few friends send money directly to avoid fees/taxes. My husband took care of the financial side of things so I don’t know all the details. All said, I’m glad it was there.
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Post by koontz on Aug 5, 2024 12:52:34 GMT
A few years ago, I donated regularly via a similar Dutch platform. Mostly to people who needed a medical procedure abroad (not available here) or to children in need of a new wheelchair or so. I loved the idea of helping anonymously. I have to admit I became a little less enthusiastic when more and more of the requests were for a vacation, a new kitten/dog or a dream wedding - but at the same time it made me feel bad that I was sitting here, at my desk, deciding who was 'worthy' or not. That did not feel right to me. Then this particular platform blew up massively. The recipients never received the money, the owner of the website claimed he was hacked, it was a mess. They did reach a settlement and most people received (part) of the money that was raised.
I haven`t donate anything via a crowdfunding platform since. I would, for people I know. For others, I will leave it at donating to charities, so it is not my decision who receives it.
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Post by koontz on Aug 5, 2024 12:53:33 GMT
So I voted: Yes, to someone I don`t know and also I strongly dislike!
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Post by smasonnc on Aug 5, 2024 13:21:20 GMT
See, I'd love to give a kid a few bucks to put towards travel. I doubt they'd fund their whole trip via GFM, but it could be a nice little boost for them, both financially and just in the way of thinking "Wow, people were willing to help me out just to be helpful. That's pretty cool." To me, it's just a big kid version of over-paying the kids down the block for lemonade I'm not going to even drink. Only, you know, without having to go throw out the cup of lemonade.  As for setting up a GFM for the parents of the 50 year old--I suppose there's the possibility they didn't have funds for funeral expenses, or, and this is the reason I think is most likely--it's something to do. When someone loses a loved one, so often we want to do something to help, but don't know what. My guess is that the GFM was someone's well-meant idea of a way to help. I see your point and the lemonade analogy is a good one, but these are able-bodied young people who could easily work for the money instead of scrounging for it. I'm that mom that made my kids work for stuff. I'm also the mom who bought popcorn from the Boy Scouts when I didn't want it so I'm not totally heartless. The original idea of GFMs was a good one, and I still donate to some of them, but their effectiveness has gotten corrupted by scams and begging. |
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Post by shescrafty on Aug 5, 2024 13:41:42 GMT
We had one set up for us as our daughter came home on hospice. I had been fired from my teaching job, and my husband had exhausted all of his leave but was home with us. People had asked to set one up for us when she was in the hospital, but my husband was still working then so we said no. When we were both home without work we said yes.
The money raised went to help pay bills and the remaining we used to start our non-profit in our daughter’s honor.
I have donated personally and through our non-profit for medical needs (especially involving children) and funeral expenses.
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Post by mikklynn on Aug 5, 2024 13:49:19 GMT
I have contributed to both people I know and to some I don't know. I prefer to donate directly to the person or family.
I will donate to strangers if I feel moved to do so. The most recent was a teen hockey player critically injured in a car accident.
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milocat
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Post by milocat on Aug 5, 2024 14:09:44 GMT
I don't like the fees that GFM charges. I don't think I've given to one.
We've had a few local instances where you could just donate directly at the bank. One was a young child had cancer. Yes we have free healthcare but going for treatment 6 hours away, time off work, hotels, food, gas is not free. We could just go to the local bank and say wd wanted to deposit $$ into the account for xxx.
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quiltz
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Post by quiltz on Aug 5, 2024 14:38:50 GMT
So many different answers from various countries. Thanks to everyone who has responded.
I was touched to read about the few that people were the recipient of the Go Fund Me. I'm so sorry about the situations that you were in but am so glad that people reached out and helped you during your time of need.
The funds for dream trips/weddings and wants rather than needs seem to be on the upswing.
Never heard of a "warm the dorm".
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Post by melanell on Aug 5, 2024 14:42:22 GMT
Yes, I have done that a few times, although sometimes those fundraisers come with prizes attached, and then the kids are hoping you will buy the item they are selling instead. I never considered that because at the schools my kid has attended they award the prizes for the most $$ donations a kid brings in, not the number of items or tickets sold. We almost never buy the thing, we just give DD a cash donation from DH’s business. She’s won the classroom level prize several times just doing that. That's a nice way for them to handle it.  |
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Post by melanell on Aug 5, 2024 14:49:25 GMT
a new thing called “Warm The Dorm.,” for a friends child going away to college. The parents make a lot of money and their daughter got a full-ride. I don’t get it?? Interesting. I hadn't heard of "Warm the Dorm" yet. In this case, it sounds to me that they are almost they're using GFM the same way other people use Amazon wish lists, but in this case, you don't get all of the funds, whereas if people just bought things from a wish list or registry, all of their contribution would go towards the gift, which seems unfortunate in this particular situation. On the flip side, a wish list might have the lowest item ring in at $50, and many people may wish to contribute less than that. Plus, some people may like the ability to stay anonymous via GFM, too, I imagine. So maybe I can see pros and cons to both approaches. But overall I'm just surprised that I didn't know dorm-warming was a thing. My college student has stayed local for school---so can I just ask for their bedroom and/or our study to be redecorated instead?  |
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Post by iamkristinl16 on Aug 5, 2024 14:50:54 GMT
I have donated a few times, usually for medical or death expenses of someone I know. In general, I have mixed feelings about them. On one hand I don't see it as much different than any other fundraiser for these types of expenses, although it is easier for all involved. On the other hand, sometimes it is frustrating to see someone who needs the money "more" getting less than someone else, just because of who they know, their own and their friends' SES, etc. But that is how life works, I guess.
ETA that I have seen some people on FB who have started several gofundme's to help them pay for rent or moving expenses several times. I am not sure how much they actually make on these, as I would think that people would stop giving after one time, when the issues keep arising (not being able to keep a job, but it is always someone else's fault, getting a pet to "help with my mental health" when you can't pay rent or other bills, etc).
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Post by compeateropeator on Aug 5, 2024 14:57:57 GMT
I don't like the fees that GFM charges. I don't think I've given to one. We've had a few local instances where you could just donate directly at the bank. One was a young child had cancer. Yes we have free healthcare but going for treatment 6 hours away, time off work, hotels, food, gas is not free. We could just go to the local bank and say wd wanted to deposit $$ into the account for xxx. I have seen this (the bank account) many times setup for families (especially those with small children) that have suddenly lost a parent or for those who are setting up accounts for small scholarships or other charity donations in memory of someone. But I see that more in smaller towns/communities with local banks. |
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Post by disneypal on Aug 5, 2024 14:58:40 GMT
I think Go Fund Me is a good thing, it is great when people that need help can get it. For example, I have given to strangers when I heard a story on the news about the loss of a child or something similar. I've given to friend's relatives when someone in their family had a health crisis (car accident, death, etc) and even for a large unexpected vet bill. I've never given for things like weddings, honeymoons or trips. Personally, I feel like those are things that someone should save and pay for on their own. I once had a friend send me the link for a GFM for her granddaughter who was trying to raise money to go to a cheer leading camp. I didn't feel compelled to give to that one (especially knowing the grand daughter goes to private school and they take lavish vacations twice a year to places I could never afford).
I've never set up a Go Fund Me. Fortunately, I have never needed to do so.
It can be a good thing if used for the right purposes. |
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Post by Mel on Aug 5, 2024 15:07:28 GMT
As the recipient of t a GFM, I do NOT contribute to them at all. Full stop.
Now I'll tell you why. LOL Ours was set up when DD was 9(9 yrs ago) to help with very unexpected and devastating medical expenses. We didn't really "advertise" it or beg for people to contribute like you see a lot of now. Her Brownie leader set it up to go along with a benefit that she put together. She only set it up as a way for people who wanted to give using a credit card and so that there wasn't a basket of cash just sitting there the day of the benefit.
It was a really good idea at the time. Then we learned that GFM is not free as they (used to) say were. They took a pretty big chunk of the $ for fees.
So I just sent directly to the people that it's intended for that way they get all of it.
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The Great Carpezio
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Post by The Great Carpezio on Aug 5, 2024 15:16:05 GMT
If it is someone I know well, I try to give money/gift cards personally or through a more direct way--volunteering, going in together, etc...
It is is someone I don't have that direct connection with (usually know them in some way, but I have given to strangers when I know it is legit), I will donate to Go Fund Me or the like.
I don't think I have ever given money that way for anything other than medical/death situations or legit organizations (but those I usually do Paypal/other if I can).
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Post by ajsweetpea on Aug 5, 2024 15:22:25 GMT
I don’t mind them for donating for medical expenses or funeral expenses. (Although I am saddened to hear about fees coming out of the total and would rather donate directly to families so they would get the full amount. And don’t even get me started about how much this country needs universal healthcare! So frustrating.)
I do get irritated seeing GoFundMe accounts set up for certain things. One person I know set up one to collect donations so her child could go on a field trip for an extracurricular activity. I personally wouldn’t expect others to pay for that for my child. No one donated. Another friend asked for donations to pay for her wedding. I also don’t think I’d expect others to help pay for my wedding. I know weddings have gotten really expensive and there’s expectations now for people to throw together a really bougie event, but if that’s not in your budget, you have to compromise.
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Post by rockymtnpea on Aug 5, 2024 15:23:53 GMT
The fees for GFM are stupid expensive. I am not sure why we ever stopped just setting an account up at a bank and people could contribute that way. Taxes maybe. Anyway, I have to really vet the situation to contribute, the latest was a self employed man that was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer. He was the cousin of a friend so I knew the situation was legit and so we sent him money directly (because once on the GFM site we decided the fees were to much and the individual could make better use of that money)
But contribute so you can have your always dreamed of wedding in Hawaii (is this number 2, 3, 4….i’ve lost count)….not a chance
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Post by crazy4scraps on Aug 5, 2024 15:24:57 GMT
a new thing called “Warm The Dorm.,” for a friends child going away to college. The parents make a lot of money and their daughter got a full-ride. I don’t get it?? Interesting. I hadn't heard of "Warm the Dorm" yet. In this case, it sounds to me that they are almost they're using GFM the same way other people use Amazon wish lists, but in this case, you don't get all of the funds, whereas if people just bought things from a wish list or registry, all of their contribution would go towards the gift, which seems unfortunate in this particular situation. On the flip side, a wish list might have the lowest item ring in at $50, and many people may wish to contribute less than that. Plus, some people may like the ability to stay anonymous via GFM, too, I imagine. So maybe I can see pros and cons to both approaches. But overall I'm just surprised that I didn't know dorm-warming was a thing. My college student has stayed local for school---so can I just ask for their bedroom and/or our study to be redecorated instead?  I’ve never heard of Warm the Dorm either, isn’t that what you do with the money a kid might get hosting a graduation open house? Maybe now since more kids don’t want to deal with the hassle of having to actually sit around talking with their family’s friends and relatives for hours on a Saturday after graduation, it’s just easier to set up a GFM. 🙄 I’m going to strongly encourage my kid to go to school locally so she can save money by living at home. |
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Post by crazy4scraps on Aug 5, 2024 15:45:35 GMT
I don’t mind them for donating for medical expenses or funeral expenses. (Although I am saddened to hear about fees coming out of the total and would rather donate directly to families so they would get the full amount. And don’t even get me started about how much this country needs universal healthcare! So frustrating.) I do get irritated seeing GoFundMe accounts set up for certain things. One person I know set up one to collect donations so her child could go on a field trip for an extracurricular activity. I personally wouldn’t expect others to pay for that for my child. No one donated. Another friend asked for donations to pay for her wedding. I also don’t think I’d expect others to help pay for my wedding. I know weddings have gotten really expensive and there’s expectations now for people to throw together a really bougie event, but if that’s not in your budget, you have to compromise. For extracurricular activities, my kid’s middle school and high school always have options for fund raising to earn the money to offset the cost. Most recently my kid had a field trip to an amusement park for a day to do a pep band concert. The cost was $45 per kid or if a family wanted to fund raise they could sell a certain number of pizza gift cards to earn it. The same was true for the $70 band jacket we bought her. I’d be surprised if every school didn’t have some form of that. For class field trips that aren’t optional, there is always a scholarship fund for the kids who can’t pay. Families that want to donate to that fund can do so directly through the online portal where we pay for the field trips. |
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Post by iamkristinl16 on Aug 5, 2024 16:16:32 GMT
If you set a goal for the go fund me and don’t make the goal, what happens? For example, I posted in my thread that my cousins husbands family was trying to get him back to his home state to see family before he dies. They have found one option but it would be $45k and they talked about starting a go fund me. I really doubt they would be able to raise that much in a short time. I guess what I’m asking is, if the funds don’t go to what they are supposed to, what happens?
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Post by KikiPea on Aug 5, 2024 16:25:36 GMT
I strongly dislike them, but will donate if I feel a strong connection to the reason. If it’s my niece asking for help because she mismanages her money? Sorry. That’s a no.
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huskergal
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,439
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Post by huskergal on Aug 5, 2024 16:34:22 GMT
I have donated for medical and death expenses. Some people I personally knew. Others I contributed to were through people that I knew.
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Post by ScrapbookMyLife on Aug 5, 2024 16:34:29 GMT
I haven't made a gfm donation.
I have given to a friend or acquaintance. I prefer to give directly to the recipient, so they get 100% of the money.
I can understand needing the help, especially in emergency type situations (funeral, injured in an accident).
There are times when I think it's abused:
Actress Alissa Milano posted a go fund on her social media, asking fans for help for her sons ball team, so the could travel to a playoff gane(s).
Scrapbooker Elizabeth Katchner received an excessive amount of money between gfm, venmo, etc... some of which she used for vacation(s) and to buy her Daughter a car. Then she had the audacity to chop up a gift card, that was from a family member she didn't like.
Wannabe "celebrity" scrapbook Tracey Claiborne has multiple times asked her groupies for money(not sure if it was gfm or other type of electronic transfer), for whatever her scam....oops I mean >> ailment of the moment is.
(old board) Pea named Liz got donation (not sure if it was gfm or another source) during her 2nd kidney transplant. Then used her own money to fund a Disney vacation. She claimed those personal funds were specifically for Disney not medical needs. She scammed a lot of peas back then. many peas were pissed.
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Post by mom on Aug 5, 2024 18:14:19 GMT
If you set a goal for the go fund me and don’t make the goal, what happens? For example, I posted in my thread that my cousins husbands family was trying to get him back to his home state to see family before he dies. They have found one option but it would be $45k and they talked about starting a go fund me. I really doubt they would be able to raise that much in a short time. I guess what I’m asking is, if the funds don’t go to what they are supposed to, what happens? Nothing happens. They can still take the money out and spend it on whatever they want. |
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scrappinmama
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Post by scrappinmama on Aug 5, 2024 23:12:27 GMT
I have only contributed once, and it was for my best friend. Her husband was dying. He was the primary caregiver for their adult disabled child. My friend had to take a leave of absence once her husband transitioned to hospice. My friend was very conflicted about the whole thing. But so many people in their community wanted to help and that was the easiest way to set that up. It allowed her to stay home for the weeks until he passed away. Anything left over went toward the funeral.
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Post by sierra821 on Aug 6, 2024 0:14:59 GMT
I’ll contribute if I feel the cause is worthy and reasonably trustworthy, just as I buy Girl Scout cookies and help clear teachers’ wish lists. I do get frustrated at how often people are trying to raise money for medical expenses, as I feel medical debt should not exist in the world’s richest country, but that’s just me. And obviously I’m not frustrated with the person in need, but with our crappy system. And sometimes they’re obviously just scams or someone looking for a payday. Skip those. I agree on the medical debt, it’s sickening and scary |
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Post by cannmom on Aug 6, 2024 0:50:33 GMT
I think the potential for scam is really high with go fund me. A family member set one up for herself that sounded absolutely heartbreaking and I’m sure many people without knowing the real situation would be led to donate. None of the money raised was used as people who donated intended it be. She took advantage of the kindness of others.
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