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Post by wordsmith on Jul 21, 2015 0:10:49 GMT
I'm so tired of these anxiety surges...posting here to distract myself. I've had generalized anxiety disorder for 28 years. Typing that makes me amazed that I've been fighting this crap for so long.
I've done therapy off and on over the years, I'm medicated, and I'm pretty high functioning but I'm just sick of having this issue.
I want to know what it feels like to plan a vacation and not immediately start making yourself sick over it, to feel excitement instead of dread, to look forward to changes--or at least not care--instead of thinking the word is going to end.
I'm stronger than the anxiety makes me feel most of the time. It's wearing me the hell out.
I've taken my Xanax to block the panic, and I'm starting to settle a bit, but now I'm going to lose this whole evening to being in bed.
Thanks for "listening."
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Mystie
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by Mystie on Jul 21, 2015 0:15:11 GMT
It is a terrible thing to deal with. I'm medicated, too, and it helps but there is still that dread when anything outside my comfort zone looms. Just wanted to say I feel ya, and just hang onto that knowledge that you are stronger than the chemicals in your brain!
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purplebee
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,732
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Post by purplebee on Jul 21, 2015 0:20:41 GMT
I have the occasional small bout of anxiety and it frustrates me to no end. I have wasted a lot of time worrying or stressing over stuff that is usually irrelevant to the actual situation. However, nothing on the scale that you are suffering.
I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers and hope that you can find a way to deal with your anxiety and find peace. It's gotta be so hard. Hugs..... and to you too, Mystie.
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valincal
Drama Llama
Southern Alberta
Posts: 5,636
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Post by valincal on Jul 21, 2015 0:25:31 GMT
Hugs. Hope tomorrow is a better day. Take care.
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Post by shevy on Jul 21, 2015 0:30:31 GMT
I'm learning that I've suffered my whole life. Until the last year or so I somehow managed it. But it's awful. And the worst part is that it comes for no reason. Hugs.
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Post by KikiPea on Jul 21, 2015 0:34:47 GMT
Hugs and prayers to you, wordsmith, and all others on this thread dealing with this issues. |
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Nicole in TX
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,951
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Post by Nicole in TX on Jul 21, 2015 1:15:36 GMT
Sending you a cyber hug!
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Deleted
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May 17, 2024 20:16:43 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 21, 2015 1:18:26 GMT
((hugs))
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akathy
What's For Dinner?
Still peaing from Podunk!
Posts: 4,546
Location: North Dakota
Jun 25, 2014 22:56:55 GMT
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Post by akathy on Jul 21, 2015 1:21:24 GMT
I'm sorry. I'm sick of my disease too but then I look at all the different ways people suffer and decide that I'll keep mine. It's hard but at least it's familiar.
I hope tomorrow is a better day for you.
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Post by Freefallfast on Jul 21, 2015 1:24:13 GMT
Me too. Just comes over me. Tired of it. I am currently being treated (and medicated) by an amazing therapist who does talk therapy but also EMDR. I've had good results with just one treatment of the EMDR. I recommend googling it and researching.
Hugs and I hear ya!
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Post by *christine* on Jul 21, 2015 2:02:49 GMT
I'm on medication as well, but I had a panic attack the other day and when I got out of the situation, I ended up crashing for 6 hours. And then I beat myself up about it for days afterward. It sucks. I was with a bunch of people that don't get it, and some of them have no idea the extent of my issues so they were making fun of me and then giving me a hard time and getting annoyed with me, neither of which helped my mood or situation.
Hope you can get some rest and feel better tomorrow.
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Post by stephgg on Jul 21, 2015 2:17:20 GMT
6 weeks after my dh left for a 7-month deployment, I had a panic attack (sahm with 3 young children). It got so bad that I eventually saw a Cognitive Behavior Therapist, who diagnosed me with Panic Disorder with Agoraphobia. After lots of therapy (no meds), many many exposures, lots of meditation, lots of reading, I can say I am about 90% recovered. I just went with a group of friends to a resort for the weekend (1.5 hours away) and I didn't have any anxiety. But...I did worry for the 2 weeks prior to the trip. Anticipation anxiety is the worst for me, but I find with every experience it gets easier. If you haven't read any books by Dr.Claire Weekes, go buy her books now. Truly life-changing. Good luck and know that you are not alone. |
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Post by Dori~Mama~Bear on Jul 21, 2015 2:27:38 GMT
Anxiety sucks! Breath deep and slow. Hugs. I hate it when my anxiety gets in the way of the things I want or need to do.
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IPeaFreely
Full Member
Posts: 389
Location: Castle Frankenstein
Jun 26, 2014 8:32:27 GMT
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Post by IPeaFreely on Jul 21, 2015 2:57:18 GMT
My brain confuses excitement/anticipation with anxiety. With this last vacation to France I had to do a little bit each day and then concentrate on relaxing. I will probably never be fully free of this problem but I'm happy that I was successful this time.
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Post by anonrefugee on Jul 21, 2015 3:03:30 GMT
Is my middle name?
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Post by wordsmith on Jul 21, 2015 3:08:09 GMT
Just woke up from my crash and read these replies. Thanks so much. It really does help to know that I'm not the only person dealing with this.
Thanks for sharing your stories. May each of you find a little bit of peace too.
Off to google some therapies/resources....
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seaexplore
Prolific Pea
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Apr 25, 2015 23:57:30 GMT
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Post by seaexplore on Jul 21, 2015 3:10:28 GMT
Right there with you! I used to take Xanax as needed. Then I miscarried. Then I got pregnant with my daughter. My hormones changed while I was pregnant and I started having fewer and fewer anxiety/panic attacks. They used to come on out of nowhere. No triggers I could ever figure out. Shaking, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, knock myself out with meds and sleep it off and then feel hung over the next day. Thankfully my DH is very understanding and doesn't take it personally when I tell him to get away from me and not to touch or talk to me. He gets it, after 15 years! I do NOT miss those crazy attacks! Now, I do still get them from time to time but in the last 4 years, I think I've had two or three that really take me out. I have found that focusing on SOMETHING (I go on a walk in my mind thru my neighborhood focusing on every single tiny detail) helps get the brain off the "bad things and bad thoughts" bullet train. No one has been able to figure out WHY I have them. I think it's hormonal.
eta: I've had anxiety my whole life! My parents always said it was a "nervous stomach". Yeah, puking every single morning before school. Puking at restaurants because I was uncomfortable. Disneyland is my hell.
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Post by penny on Jul 21, 2015 3:13:57 GMT
Same... Everything you just wrote... It's only been five years for me, and I'm amazed at the strength of others who have managed and coped for longer...
I have days where I feel like my normal self and then it comes out of nowhere and I'm barely hanging on for days - loosing myself to bed like you wrote... Then it's time to pick back up where I left off... I too wish I could experience that kind of indifference where things aren't/don't have to be perfect and that nothing's wrong or about to go wrong, at the same time...
Sending good vibes your way... Thanks for sharing and making me feel less like I'm the only one who has these days...
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Post by scrapmaven on Jul 21, 2015 3:55:34 GMT
GAD is a chronic disease and that means manageable. It also means chronic and that sucks. When things are worse does your psych do med adjustments and changes? Sometimes it's about being on the right meds and dosage and sometimes it's just overwhelming anyway. That's when you need to be even more loving and patient w/yourself. Gentle ((((HUGS)))).
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Deleted
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May 17, 2024 20:16:43 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 21, 2015 11:43:30 GMT
Hugs to you. I struggle with anxiety too, especially with my job. And vacations, like you mentioned, are a challenge.
A book that really helped me was "Your Erroneous Zones" by Dr. Wayne Dyer. His theory (which is by no means original, but he just lays it out so well) is: your thoughts control your feelings, you can control your thoughts, therefore you can control your feelings.
I use the tools I learned in this book on a daily basis, and it has made a big difference in my daily happiness. (And sometimes, half a xanax helps, too!)
Hope you feel better.
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BarbaraUK
Drama Llama
Surrounded by my yarn stash on the NE coast of England...............!! Refupea 1702
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Jun 27, 2014 12:47:11 GMT
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Post by BarbaraUK on Jul 21, 2015 12:19:55 GMT
I think a lot of people have suffered an isolated episode of something like this at some time and find it unpleasant but your post brings home just how awful and distressing it is to suffer from this all the time.  Sending you every positive and good thought wordsmith and I hope it won't be long before you can find at least a little peace and enjoy something instead of dreading it. |
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Judy26
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Post by Judy26 on Jul 21, 2015 14:06:52 GMT
I understand and sympathize. I have a constant stomach ache. I take Zoloft which helps and I need to exercise. I also have to force myself to leave the house unless I have to be somewhere. Left to my own devices I would stay in my room which is my comfort zone. I hope you find the perfect mix of therapies for your anxiety. I envy people who don't worry or feel anxiety on a daily basis.
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Post by shevy on Jul 21, 2015 18:01:57 GMT
I'm thankful people are posting about their experiences too. Not everyone around me gets my anxiety. My husband wants to 'fix it' and struggles with not being able to. But it's nice knowing that there are others out there who can share their experiences and what helped them.
I LOVE riding my motorcycle. But this summer I've only rode a couple of times because I just don't trust myself not to have anxiety. Sunday I rode with DH on his for a day ride. About 30 minutes from home, POW anxiety/panic. It was one of foreboding/get home NOW/something is going to happen... I tried to breathe through it, talk myself through it, but nothing was working. So I held DH tight and put my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes. It was bad. And it wore me out.
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georgiapea
Drama Llama
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Post by georgiapea on Jul 21, 2015 18:56:28 GMT
I'm pretty sure my DH suffers from anxiety. I get anxious about social situations and usually convince myself that I don't want to attend them. I find something 'more fun' to do instead. Like cleaning out the bird cage or laundry.
DH is a 'joiner' and loves attending things so he's fine with social stuff. But money and jobs and the future send him around the bend. I'm constantly saying "Worrying about this won't help one bit so why are you doing it"?
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Post by anniefb on Jul 21, 2015 19:11:44 GMT
Hugs and prayers to you, wordsmith, and all others on this thread dealing with this issues. Yes  |
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Post by Merge on Jul 21, 2015 19:22:59 GMT
I'm pretty sure my DH suffers from anxiety. I get anxious about social situations and usually convince myself that I don't want to attend them. I find something 'more fun' to do instead. Like cleaning out the bird cage or laundry. DH is a 'joiner' and loves attending things so he's fine with social stuff. But money and jobs and the future send him around the bend. I'm constantly saying "Worrying about this won't help one bit so why are you doing it"? Same! I have low-level social anxiety like that and always regret making plans, though if I go I always end up enjoying myself. DH loves to socialize, but any little worry about his job or money or anything like that sends him completely over the edge. He had to get a mouth guard because he was grinding his teeth at night and broke a molar. I wish he would talk it over with his doctor because he's at the point where I think medication might help. |
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Post by monicad on Jul 21, 2015 19:24:21 GMT
I understand your frustration. I also suffered for years, eventually becoming semi-agoraphobic. It's such an all consuming, draining illness that few understand. Through about two years of nonstop work I'm much better, but some of the symptoms will always linger. There's also the fear that the full blown anxiety will return.
It's good we have places like this to talk and know that we're not alone.
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azredhead
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Post by azredhead on Jul 21, 2015 21:00:40 GMT
Hugs!! It runs deep on my moms side. My sister is the worst. With the panic attack (borderline bipolar) My mom just got her back in to a new dr. and my mom just got her self back in because she was on zanax and it gave her the shakes real bad. She's just finally getting that out of her system. They put her on Zoloft. I was on that for a while and like it so I recommended it to her so they started her on that and that seems to be helping for her and not giving her the shakes. She was worries she was gonna have a seizere or some sort of an attack. with all the stuff going on with my sister too. I'm not sure what they started my sister on but she seems to be doing better. I know it's hard to be dependent on meds that was my moms thing. She really didn't want the meds. My sister didn't have much of a choice. But it made all the difference in the world. Mom says she's a whole different person. (they live in a different state.)
When I was up there with them i was coloring with them. My sister was asking me about it. She said she actually started doing it. She lived in Portland. She had to move back because of the panic attacks. To be closer to family. But she had started coloring and found it helpful too so she was gonna do it more so she did some with me while it I was there. We found some fun ones on line and at hobby lobby. It really helps to have something to keep busy. For some reason the colors help.
I also take Lunesta at night because it shuts the brain off so I don't get the anxiety at night when it kicks in the most.
Like others have said you're not alone the meds do help it's hard not to want them but sometimes you can start out with them and see what works and what doesn't. It helps to find a good dr. Hang in there.
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Post by peanuttle on Jul 21, 2015 21:12:50 GMT
I have never had bad anxiety, but with the bouts I had, I find that Magnesium does wonders. I now take 4-5 400mg tablets of magnesium each night before bed.
I know it's now a cure, but I wonder if it would help take the edge off.
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moodyblue
Drama Llama
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Location: Western Illinois
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Jun 26, 2014 21:07:23 GMT
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Post by moodyblue on Jul 21, 2015 21:27:03 GMT
I don't have this kind of anxiety, but I know someone who used to suffer from anxiety and agoraphobia.
I think it helps those of us who have never experienced this to read about other people who do feel this, and I hope it would make me more understanding of someone I knew who had severe anxiety.
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Time to get off the internet!
