AnotherPea
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,967 
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Post by AnotherPea on Jul 23, 2015 15:51:54 GMT
Shower etiquette has changed radically since I attended my first one. In the past month I've received two FB invites from the brides-to-be themselves. Throwing their own showers, sending out their own invitations (last one went to 485 different people - her entire friends list). I went to a shower a couple of weeks ago where prizes were awarded.
I was brought up that prizes won from games were discretely placed on the gift table, for the guest of honor to take home with her. None of the women at the last few showers I have attended have given up their prizes. Up until 10-15 years ago, all of the women did.
I'm guessing that this is a regional thing?
At showers with games, who keeps the prizes in your area?
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Post by myshelly on Jul 23, 2015 15:55:09 GMT
The winner keeps the prize.
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NoWomanNoCry
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,856
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Post by NoWomanNoCry on Jul 23, 2015 16:01:27 GMT
I've never heard of the guest of honor taking home the prize unless she actually won the game. It's always been the winner takes home the prize from my experience.
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Why
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,111
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Post by Why on Jul 23, 2015 16:02:55 GMT
I haven't been to a shower in years but when I did go the winner kept the prize. The first time I heard about giving it to the bride/new mom was here and I don't understand that .
Usually the prizes are not big ticket items.
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akathy
What's For Dinner?
Still peaing from Podunk!
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Location: North Dakota
Jun 25, 2014 22:56:55 GMT
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Post by akathy on Jul 23, 2015 16:06:49 GMT
At baby showers here the prizes are baby things like rattles, pacifiers, baby lotion, etc. they are always given to the mother to be. At wedding showers I've seen both ways depending on what the prizes are.
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Post by jemali on Jul 23, 2015 16:08:38 GMT
The person that won the prize. It's usually something little like a pot holder or towel or candy bar.
I have never heard of "discreetly" putting it on the gift table for the guest of honor.
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oldcrow
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,828
Location: Ontario,Canada
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Post by oldcrow on Jul 23, 2015 16:11:10 GMT
The person that won the prize. It's usually something little like a pot holder or towel or candy bar. I have never heard of "discreetly" putting it on the gift table for the guest of honor.  |
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Post by bluepoprocks on Jul 23, 2015 16:14:56 GMT
The winner keeps the prize at all the showers I've been at.
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eastcoastpea
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,252
Jun 27, 2014 13:05:28 GMT
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Post by eastcoastpea on Jul 23, 2015 16:18:50 GMT
The winner has always kept the prizes here.
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Post by threegirls on Jul 23, 2015 16:39:34 GMT
Admittedly I have not been to a wedding or baby shower for several years but the ones I have attended the winner kept the prize.
I also have never been invited to a shower that was given by and for the bride or expectant mother or one that had an invitation list of 484 other close friends. I guess I'm pretty out of touch.
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Post by STBC on Jul 23, 2015 16:40:23 GMT
Shower prizes are a relatively new thing to me, as are shower games. (Didn't have games/prizes at either of my bridal showers 20 years ago!)
Last baby shower I attended, I "won" a chocolate covered pretzel. Didn't even consider that leaving it for the mom to be might be a thing ;-)
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Post by liya on Jul 23, 2015 16:44:26 GMT
The winner keeps the prize at the showers I have been to. At any baby showers the prizes have not been baby related no need to discretely place it on the gift table. The host usually wants the prize winner to keep the prize. The guest of honor gets enough "loot" from the gifts. Lol.
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grinningcat
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,663
Jun 26, 2014 13:06:35 GMT
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Post by grinningcat on Jul 23, 2015 16:47:59 GMT
What's the point of playing those shitty games if you get nothing to show for them? To be honest, the expectation that the bride or mom to be would keep the prizes that other people have won really seems selfish and entitled. If I have to go through the torture of some stupid shower game, you bet your ass I am going to be keeping whatever stupid prize is given to me.
In other words, I've never heard of this practice and I think it's stupid. If a host or guest of honour expected that of me, I'd think less of them because it seems to be really selfish.
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Loydene
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,639
Location: Albuquerque, New Mexico
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Post by Loydene on Jul 23, 2015 16:57:29 GMT
I'm not quite as vehement as grinningcat  -- but I have had the experience of being expected to leave the prize for the honoree. Which is what I expect colored my interest in shower "games"(well, that and just becoming older I'd expect!). I whole heartedly agree with the "what's the point" question and that there is "torture" in "stupid shower games"!!! |
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sharlag
Drama Llama
I like my artsy with a little bit of fartsy.
Posts: 6,488
Location: Kansas
Jun 26, 2014 12:57:48 GMT
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Post by sharlag on Jul 23, 2015 16:58:49 GMT
Wasn't there a thread about this a while back? A pea and her teenage daughter attended, the daughter won a game and didn't know she was expected to give the gift to the guest of honor?
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peppermintpatty
Pearl Clutcher
Refupea #1345
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Post by peppermintpatty on Jul 23, 2015 17:14:45 GMT
Keep the damn prize! It probably isn't worth much and I would be mortified if my guests were expected to give them back to me. Those games are horrible enough as it is, let the people who suffered through them have something for their trouble!  |
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scorpeao
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Location: NorCal USA
Jun 25, 2014 21:04:54 GMT
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Post by scorpeao on Jul 23, 2015 17:21:30 GMT
the last shower I went to was a wedding shower. All the prizes, about 5, were the exact same thing. I'm pretty sure the bride to be didn't want the prize back. Now, if it had been a baby shower and the prize was a pacifier I would have left that for the mom to be. A prize not baby related I would've taken home.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 8, 2023 8:31:14 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 23, 2015 17:25:46 GMT
I've never heard of giving the prize to the shower honoree. Game winner takes it home. But I've also never seen baby related prizes at a baby shower either. The prizes are typically somehow related to the game. Like the game where you tear off a length of toilet paper long enough to go around the expectant mother by guessing. The person who is closest gets a new roll of tp. Or winning the "guess the melted mess in the diaper" would get an intact candy bar.
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Post by epeanymous on Jul 23, 2015 17:29:01 GMT
Most showers I've attended haven't had games, but the ones that have, the prizes have been, as a pp said, the same thing, and I have difficulty imagining that the items were meant to be left for the mother. If you were supposed to take them and left them at the party instead, I would think the host could end up a little insulted that you didn't like the prize and didn't bother to take it.
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Jul 23, 2015 17:35:34 GMT
why should you be 'expected' to leave the prizes for the honoree at an event that's going to net the honoree tons more stuff than those few prizes are worth, anyway?
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Post by Prenticekid on Jul 23, 2015 17:42:26 GMT
Here, prizes are for the winners. They are not baby items and they are in no way intended for the guest of honor. I've never even heard of that except from Peas.
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Post by cmpeter on Jul 23, 2015 17:42:31 GMT
Winner keeps the prize.
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Post by gramasue on Jul 23, 2015 17:46:00 GMT
I haven't been to a shower in years but when I did go the winner kept the prize. The first time I heard about giving it to the bride/new mom was here and I don't understand that . Usually the prizes are not big ticket items. Ditto! |
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Post by bothmykidsrbrats on Jul 23, 2015 17:53:46 GMT
This is the only place I've ever heard of people leaving their prizes for the bride or mom.
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Post by MorningPerson on Jul 23, 2015 18:36:41 GMT
Count me in with those who've never heard of the winner leaving her prize for the honoree.
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peasquared
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,889
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Post by peasquared on Jul 23, 2015 18:45:18 GMT
I grew up with the "give the prize to the honoree". Maybe it was a regional thing, or my generation, I don't know.
FTR, I grew up in Iowa and am in my early 50's.
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Post by Bitchy Rich on Jul 23, 2015 19:02:03 GMT
The only time I have ever heard of prizes being left for the honoree is on this board. I think it's weird as hell that baby showers would have baby type prizes that should be left for the mom to be.
If someone discretely left their prize behind, I would assume they didn't want it and considered it a crappy prize.
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Post by winogirl on Jul 23, 2015 19:39:48 GMT
Never heard of giving the prize to the honoree. I like games so I don't mind (most) of them but they are completely pointless if you can't keep the prize you won.
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Post by originalvanillabean on Jul 23, 2015 19:46:18 GMT
It's been years since I attended a shower, but I think it's odd to leave the prizes for the honoree. If you win, you should get to keep it.
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Post by ktdoesntscrap on Jul 23, 2015 19:48:50 GMT
If it is clearly for the honoree like a baby thing... it is given to the mtb
But if it is a candle or something generic it goes to the prize winner.
Though I have not been to a shower in probably 20 years where people played games.
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-- but I have had the experience of being expected to leave the prize for the honoree. 
