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Post by Lindarina on Jan 13, 2016 16:01:30 GMT
Update 02.05, and it's not a good one:
My father works on a platform, and today they called because they have to send my father home. He's been acting confused, getting lost, forgetting to use safety equipment etc. he seems depressed and sad.
I'm heartbroken! And I fear there will be no happy ending
When did you become aware of it? How did it start?
i guess I'm just worried about my father these days. Dementia seems to run strong in our family. This last year has been a series of tiny incident. They are beginning to add up. Forgetting words, stopping mid sentence and struggling to finish it, forgetting the meaning of basic words. Last time my brother spoke to him he didn't know what a postal code was. Tiny things like that.
He's also stopped doing maintenance on some things, like his sailboat and his cabin. This is a man that has worked with his hands his whole life, spent every summer at sea, built porches etc. but then again, he's 60 and just might not have the energy anymore.
What really made me worried though was a conversation I had with him last week. He seemed grumpy and not himself really. He was away for work during the Holidays and we were discussing gifts for his Grandchildren. He seemed bothered by the idea of having to go shopping and wanted to just give them some money, which was fine by me but seemed odd because he usually takes them with him every year and let's them pick something out. It's been their tradition.
this week we talked again, planning on meeting the same day, and he was in his usual good mood again. But he wondered why we hadn't planned the annual Christmas gift shopping. Wouldn't the kids want gifts? He had no recollections of our other conversation.
I try to tell myself that it's probably nothing, but he is only 60. Isn't that a bit early to show signs of old age? I'm worried it's something more.
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Post by mikklynn on Jan 13, 2016 16:11:00 GMT
It's not nothing. He needs to be seen by a physician. The forgetting what a postal code is is troubling. I would document and share with his doctor, if he will allow you to go.
Be prepared for him to be angry and deny everything. You may have to beg him to do it "for you" and your peace of mind.
It may be dementia or a small stroke or a drug reaction. Only his doctor can find out.
Hugs and best wishes.
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Post by Lindarina on Jan 13, 2016 16:16:38 GMT
What makes it harder is that this is probably one of his biggest fears. His mother suffered from this and his sister seems to be going down the same path. My aunt has not reacted well to her family trying to help.
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Post by trixiecat on Jan 13, 2016 16:18:09 GMT
The fact that he is 60 and is having what appears to be short term memory issues would be troubling to me. I would definitely try and encourage him to go with you to the doctor.
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Post by sugarmama on Jan 13, 2016 16:18:31 GMT
My MIL is showing signs of dementia. Some days she's angry at everything! Yesterday I dropped her off at her senior living center, handed her the key to her room and told her I was going to park the car and meet her in the lobby. I got a parking space right by the door and when I got to the lobby, she was frantically looking for her key. I look up and a woman that works there is holding the key and told me she came in and handed it to her and told her it didn't work. We get to her room and of course, the key works just fine. I was a bit irritated at the time, but last night thinking about all of what's going on just made me really sad.
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Post by cmhs on Jan 13, 2016 16:25:44 GMT
Reading your post makes me think of my mom who is doing all the same things you wrote (except getting angry). Mom is 90 though so I think your dad needs to see a doctor soon. Good luck to you.
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Post by myboysnme on Jan 13, 2016 16:27:02 GMT
First, when he was about 70, he started getting angry and having outbursts. He would react strongly to things he would have ignored previously. One time we called the police because he was throwing a trash can against the wall and got out of control.
He started losing some inhibitions, like talking about someone being sexy or what he's like to do when he would never have talked about that in front of us. He saw a picture of Lily Tomlin in a newspaper and got fixated on her.
Then when driving he would ignore stop signs or other traffic signs. Just didn't acknowledge a red light, for example.
Eventually, he lost a lot of his communication and became quite docile, hard to engage. He lived with dementia for at least 15 years from the time we noticed and he died last August.
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Post by Lindarina on Feb 5, 2016 19:32:37 GMT
Update in OP
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valincal
Drama Llama
Southern Alberta
Posts: 5,637
Jun 27, 2014 2:21:22 GMT
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Post by valincal on Feb 5, 2016 19:37:22 GMT
I'm so sorry. I know you will have a long road ahead of you. I hope you can get your dad the help he needs. Big hugs.
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The Birdhouse Lady
Drama Llama
Moose. It's what's for dinner.
Posts: 7,175
Location: Alaska -The Last Frontier
Jun 30, 2014 17:15:19 GMT
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Post by The Birdhouse Lady on Feb 5, 2016 19:39:06 GMT
Oh man, so sorry to read your update. *hugs*
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Post by Delta Dawn on Feb 5, 2016 20:24:21 GMT
I am just going offer a hug. We started seeing symptoms about age 65. Plus she had just about everything that can cause dementia. For us it is a good thing. It is due to her other diagnosis. I am so sorry. From the bottom of my heart.
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Post by mikklynn on Feb 5, 2016 20:25:13 GMT
I am so sorry re: update. He's so young - not much older than I am! I hope you can get him to go to the doctor.
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Post by Lindarina on Feb 5, 2016 21:05:46 GMT
Thank you for all your kind words.
The hardest part right now is not being able to talk to him. They won't be able to fly him home before Tuesday, and since he's in a bit of denial about his situation right now, it could add more stress to him if he gets a phone call from us.
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melissa
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,912
Jun 25, 2014 20:45:00 GMT
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Post by melissa on Feb 5, 2016 21:06:50 GMT
I also just read the initial post- he is only 60! That is young for the issues you are describing.
If he has not, he needs a full work up to make sure there are no underlying conditions. This needs to be done very soon as this is has now affected his ability to work.
ETA: I did not understand what a platform was at first. Will his employer get him to medical care when they fly him home?
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Post by christine58 on Feb 5, 2016 21:17:12 GMT
Please get him a complete physical. It could be something other than dementia.
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Post by Lindarina on Feb 5, 2016 21:17:40 GMT
I also just read the initial post- he is only 60! That is young for the issues you are describing. If he has not, he needs a full work up to make sure there are no underlying conditions. This needs to be done very soon as this is has now affected his ability to work. ETA: I did not understand what a platform was at first. Will his employer get him to medical care when they fly him home? He works at an oil platform, or oil rig. There's medical personnel there, and if his condition ever gets critical they will send a helicopter out to get him home earlier. He's not going to be allowed to work offshore again until he's been cleared by a doctor, but I doubt that's going to happen.
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Post by Lindarina on Feb 5, 2016 21:19:34 GMT
Please get him a complete physical. It could be something other than dementia. Our plan is to get him straight to the doctor. Hopefully he agrees
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Post by peasapie on Feb 5, 2016 21:23:43 GMT
I'm so sorry. That certainly doesn't seem like a good sign.
He needs a thorough checkup to rule out physical problems: medication interactions, heart issues, etc.
60 is very young.
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mshershey
Junior Member
Posts: 68
Jul 12, 2014 2:30:10 GMT
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Post by mshershey on Feb 5, 2016 21:29:48 GMT
I'm so sorry. My mother was 64 when we first noticed the signs. She lived with it for 10 years. This is such a horrible disease. I hope this is something that can be fixed with a simple medication adjustment.
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Post by hosschick on Feb 5, 2016 22:05:48 GMT
I'm so sorry to read your update, although it is good to know that his coworkers were attentive. I hope you're able to get him home and have some answers soon.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 19, 2024 10:35:31 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Feb 5, 2016 22:09:57 GMT
I am so very sorry. I went through this for the last few years and it is heartbreaking at best. Prayers to you
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Post by librarylady on Feb 5, 2016 22:15:01 GMT
This is all scary.
He, as you know, needs to see a dr. ASAP. He could be having TIA episodes. Whatever is going on, he needs to be evaluated.
If he knows he is forgetting, that is a good sign. If he is unaware that he is forgetting things, that is troublesome.
I wish the best for you and your family.
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maurchclt
Pearl Clutcher
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Jul 4, 2014 16:53:27 GMT
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Post by maurchclt on Feb 5, 2016 22:21:16 GMT
Whew, 60 is young, I'm dealing with this with my mom and she's in her 90's. Nothing to add to what everyone else has said. Just know this is a safe place to come and "talk" anytime. Hugs.
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caro
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Refupea 1130
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Jun 26, 2014 14:10:36 GMT
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Post by caro on Feb 5, 2016 22:26:32 GMT
I haven't read any further than OP. I would hope your dad has had a full physical exam with blood work and brain scans.
My dad had age related dementia. It's very hard to watch. I'm sorry and hugs for you.
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Post by Linda on Feb 5, 2016 22:35:22 GMT
((((Hugs))) and prayers
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suzastampin
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,587
Jun 28, 2014 14:32:59 GMT
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Post by suzastampin on Feb 5, 2016 23:39:06 GMT
How scary. Does he take any type of med for anything? Has there been a change in it? Been prescribed a new med? Has he lost weight where possibly a dosage might need a change?
Hopefully some blood work will give you some answers.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Feb 5, 2016 23:44:42 GMT
I just read your update.
I am so sorry. (((hugs)))
My best advice would be to get him to the doctor. Tell him everything you have told us. It may even be helpful to write everything down.
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Post by bc2ca on Feb 6, 2016 0:00:42 GMT
I'm sorry you are facing this - the worst time for my mom was when she knew something was happening, but didn't want to confirm with a diagnosis.
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FurryP
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To pea or not to pea...
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Jun 26, 2014 19:58:26 GMT
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Post by FurryP on Feb 6, 2016 3:21:00 GMT
I am so sorry. When the parents that you once looked to for your care, now need you, it's not a good feeling. But only because you worry. Don't give up hope yet. Maybe it is something that can be fixed. Or at least controlled. Saying prayers for your dad.
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Post by cadoodlebug on Feb 6, 2016 4:22:57 GMT
My sister passed away at age 59 from AD. His doctor will run a lot of tests to rule out other causes. Stroke, depression, thyroid issues, etc. I pray there is another answer for you.
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