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Post by Deleted on Apr 7, 2016 18:33:53 GMT
Sensitive topic, so hoping no one thinks badly of me.
I don't have much experience with having a pet euthanized. I've only ever had one cat that had to be, and the vet is the one who recommended when I had taken him in, it wasn't something I had thought about before hand (he was only a few years old)
Currently, I have a 16 year old cat, who has been struggling to walk. I can see her limping and sometimes her back leg goes out on her. She sleeps the vast majority of the day. She stopped sleeping on the furniture a few months ago because she can no longer get up on it. I did take her to the vet a couple weeks ago and she gave me glucosamine and also a pain killer to give her twice a day. She has arthritis which is part of the problem, but the vet also thinks she has an acl tear which would require surgery. The vet also thinks she has diabetes. We got her about 3 years ago from a shelter and she weighed 20lbs, she is now down to 13 (not on a diet either). This cat gets extremely stressed out leaving the house. She hid for 2 days under my bed once we got back from the vet. She doesn't like change at all and will hide if new people come in the house.
I don't want to do more testing or surgery on her, because of her age, the fact that she would be miserable, and also the cost. I already have one cat who is expensive because he is on a prescription urinary diet and I spent almost $1000 on him last year when he was sick. (He is young though, and is not bothered by the vet, or anything really)
I feel like it's maybe time to just ask the vet to put her down. I feel really guilty though. I know she would be traumatized by more vet visits and twice daily shots if I do have her tested for diabetes, but I also feel like I'm failing her. How do you decide it's time? Do you go only by what the vet says, or is it ok to ask for her to be euthanized?
Any experience would be appreciated, I've been really struggling to decide what to do.
UPDATE: thank you for the help. Last night she wasn't even able to get out of her bed. She was taken to the vet this morning and is now gone. Just in the 2 weeks since we went to the vet last she had lost over another lb, and they found blood in her urine. Vet said we could do more testing, up her pain medication and start her on the insulin shots or choose to euthanize her. At her age, I just couldn't see putting her through tests, constant trips to the vet, etc.
I bawled my eyes out, but do feel like it was the right decision. I just could tell how much she was suffering these last few days and couldn't bear to see it continue
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Post by lorieann13 on Apr 7, 2016 18:38:04 GMT
This is never an easy decision. Hugs.
I always go by quality of life. If the animal is in pain or struggles to get around I would put them to sleep.
Now if the animal seems fine then I wouldnt.
You can always ask your vet for their opinion and see if they can tell you if it will rapidly get worse or if the cat is in pain.
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luvnlifelady
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Jun 26, 2014 2:34:35 GMT
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Post by luvnlifelady on Apr 7, 2016 18:39:46 GMT
I understand what you are talking about. It sounds like it's her time though. I have read a tip that it's time when your pet can no longer do it's 3 favorite things. Since she can already no longer get on the furniture, it sounds like it might be either at or close to time.
We had a vet service come to the house the last time we had to put our cat down. It was beautiful and they later sent her ashes and paw print to us. Maybe you can find one of those or your own vet would make a house call.
Sorry you are facing this decision.
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gsquaredmom
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Post by gsquaredmom on Apr 7, 2016 18:42:20 GMT
Given what you describe, it's time. I am sorry. It is not easy. But it is part of your job as a pet owner. Love her enough to do this last thing.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 7, 2016 18:44:56 GMT
I feel that a pet parent has a responsibility to ensure quality of life.
From what you describe, I would probably make the choice to let them go.
The age combined with the anxiety and probable diabetes, as well as needing surgery, would be more than I could do to an old lady.
I just had my 12 year old Big Tom put down. He was a stray with FIV which turned into AIDS. He could have gotten a few more weeks, maybe, but he was going down hill. The next step for him would have been pain from organ failure. Wasn't going to have my Big Tom in pain.
I still cry and second guess. But I know, in my soul, that I honored him by letting him go, even though it sucked.
Please be gentle on yourself. Listen to your heart. And huge hugs.
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keithurbanlovinpea
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Jun 29, 2014 3:29:30 GMT
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Post by keithurbanlovinpea on Apr 7, 2016 18:50:40 GMT
I agree with the others. If she is not happy living the life she has, then it is time. If you want to avoid the stress of another visit, see of the vet (or another vet) can do an in-home euthanasia.
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Post by disneypal on Apr 7, 2016 18:50:54 GMT
I've only had to make that decision twice in my life and as you said - it isn't easy. For me, though, it was easier to know when. With the first one, she had cancer - the vet said she was in pain (and she was having seizures) and said he could do experimental surgery to see had bad it was but then there probably wouldn't be any treatment (this was in 1980 so things have come a long way since then). He suggested to euthanize her and I chose to do that.
The other time, my dog was getting older, had been diabetic for 5 years (shots twice a day) but I could see him going downhill, he lost his sight and mostly slept. When we went outside, I carried him and put him down to take care of his business and then carried him back into the house. One day, when I sat him down outside he started stumbling and couldn't stand on his own. I rushed him to the emergency vet (Friday night) and they said his body was shutting down. So I made the decision to let him go.
It was hard and as you said, you feel guilty, however.....it is one of the most loving things you can actually do for your pet. If they are suffering and you can put an end to that and let them go peacefully, then it is a loving and caring thing to do.
I'm sorry you are going through this but I'm sure you want what is best for you cat.
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Post by krc11 on Apr 7, 2016 18:53:15 GMT
Based on what you described, if it were my cat, I would have her euthanized so she didn't have to suffer any long. If fact I have several times for my older dogs - two were having problems walking and the other had arthritis and breathing problems. All were in pain but you'd have to know what pain looks like to know. If she is suffering (and you said the doctor gave pain meds), she is not having good quality of life. Especially one who is so traumatized by vet visits. Don't feel guilty. You gave her a wonderful last three years.
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julieb
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Post by julieb on Apr 7, 2016 19:01:38 GMT
I'm waiting for the day to be in that boat. Our dog is almost 15, although he sleeps most of the day, when he is alert he still runs and tries to fetch. He's pretty blind and deaf. It will be our first decision, as this is the only dog we have ever had together. It will be an incredibly tough one.
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scrappington
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Post by scrappington on Apr 7, 2016 19:11:45 GMT
If he was a shelter cat than the only can assume he was a certain age then. He may be older. If you are thinking of it, you know its time. He's not a kitten and has a long life ahead of him so surgery wouldn't be for a couple months maybe a year of life. I'm sorry you have to deal with this. Worst part of being a pet owner.
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used2scrap
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Jan 29, 2016 3:02:55 GMT
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Post by used2scrap on Apr 7, 2016 19:25:40 GMT
We've had to make the decision twice with senior pets, a dog and a cat. Looking back now, we let them suffer too long because we couldn't bring ourselves to make the decision. It sounds like your kitty is trying to tell you it is time. And for what it is worth, our vet didn't question our decisions or requests, there was no judgement. It certainly is not an easy thing to do, but I hope we can make the decision earlier in the future to save our pets from extra suffering.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 7, 2016 19:34:19 GMT
We've had to have two of our pets put down this year. Our Sheltie, we knew the time was near and when we made the final decision our vet came to our home. It was such a more peaceful experience for not only us, but for Boomer. We are SO glad we were able to have the euthanasia done at home.
With our cat, we knew the time was nearing, as well, but he started having horrific seizures on a Sunday and our vet was not available. We ended up going to an Emer vet and requesting the euthanasia. It was awful, but we knew we couldn't let him suffer any longer.
In the end, you know your pet and when he/she is suffering to the point that there is no longer quality of life. Vets understand this and are amazingly compassionate at times like this.
I'm very sorry you and your cat are going through this. {{Hugs}}
L
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GiantsFan
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Post by GiantsFan on Apr 7, 2016 19:34:50 GMT
Uggh, this is the worst part of being a pet owner. I've had to make that decision too many times.
You have to decide what the quality of your pets life will be after treatment vs the financial outlay for you. I know that sounds horrible, but with an older pet you have to consider these things. Says someone who had a 16 yo blind, diabetic, heart murmur-y, deaf, abscessed tooth dog.
ETA we put him down when he stopped eating.
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Post by Meri-Lyn on Apr 7, 2016 20:39:25 GMT
I'm not one to ask, I just spent $800 on an 18 year-old. (Abscessed tooth.) We discussed it with the vet. If there were other underlying issues, with his blood work, etc., then we would have to make the decision, but for his age he is otherwise healthy. As I told a friend, his heart could give out a few months from now, or he could live another 2 or 3 years, it's a crap shoot. We just don't know. But he's back to eating, drinking and otherwise acting normally for now, thank goodness! Unfortunately, they can't really tell you what's wrong. You just go with instinct.
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Post by lesserknownpea on Apr 7, 2016 20:49:26 GMT
It is so hard to do, and at first you feel guilty. But as you look back it is a comfort that you were able to end their suffering.
And the memories of the better times are what you are left with.
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Post by papersilly on Apr 7, 2016 20:50:47 GMT
it's not an easy decision. most people (in hindsight) probably do it later than sooner because they couldn't cope with making that decision. do what is best for your pet and not for you and any inability to cope.
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raindancer
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Post by raindancer on Apr 7, 2016 21:08:52 GMT
it's not an easy decision. most people (in hindsight) probably do it later than sooner because they couldn't cope with making that decision. do what is best for your pet and not for you and any inability to cope. I wonder how much that has to do with the dichotomy in our society that we must let people die on their own, or it is murder/suicide, but for pets we recognize that we shouldn't let an animal suffer when it is the end of life. Whatever the reason, it's never an easy decision. I'm sorry OP. I had to put our old man down in October and it was so hard. It was the vet that said it was time, but we probably should have made the choice sooner to prevent some of the suffering he experienced in his last week of life. I hope you are able to make a decision, and that you find peace with it. ((hugs))
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Post by redshoes on Apr 7, 2016 21:46:18 GMT
It's heartbreaking....we had to make a similar decision. When you're at peace that you love them enough to let go, it's the right time.
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Post by coaliesquirrel on Apr 7, 2016 22:57:13 GMT
While I agree with the others that it sounds likely that it's time in your case, I do want to point out that diabetes in a cat doesn't always mean shots. We had a cat diagnosed when she was about 3, and they said we could try the diabetic food, and that'd probably get us a couple more years with her. It was time last fall - when she was over 18. Just the diabetic food bought us 15 more years with our sweetie.
Again, not second-guessing you at all right now - I just want to be sure others know a diabetic kitty can at least sometimes be treated easily (although the food's about 4x more $$) with diet alone, so don't freak out if you get that diagnosis for a beloved feline.
Huge hugs and wishes for peace to you as you endure the worst part of being owned by a pet.
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Post by corinne11 on Apr 7, 2016 23:16:58 GMT
Most of our cats are aged between 12 and 15. They were strays we took in. We know that we will need to make these decisions soon, 7 times.
When our dog had cancer we did pay about $600 to have a vet come to our home. (this included cremation, ashes in urn) Our dog hated the vet and we were happy that he got to spend his last morning with us sitting on the couch.
You know your pet and only you will know the right decision for you and your cat. Wishing you well.
Corinne
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Post by pmm on Apr 8, 2016 0:40:19 GMT
I've had to make that decision before...it's a tough one. My heart goes out to you.
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Gravity
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Post by Gravity on Apr 8, 2016 0:49:44 GMT
I am so sorry. ((HUGS))
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pudgygroundhog
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Jun 25, 2014 20:18:39 GMT
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Post by pudgygroundhog on Apr 8, 2016 0:55:51 GMT
I'm sorry you are faced with this decision. I agree with the above posters that you shouldn't feel guilty because it does sound like it might be her time. ((hugs))
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Post by Delta Dawn on Apr 8, 2016 0:58:26 GMT
Hi I have a bit of experience here. I just got home from the vet about 30 minutes ago. I have a 15 year old big dog who is old and having problems. The vet said he is doing ok for someone his age. Give him pain pills and pills for incontinence.
Well in May my other 15.5 year old standard poodle started having issues. She was sleeping all the time. She wanted to take naps with one of us. She then lost control of her bodily functions. I could have done more palliative care for her I am sure as she seemed to be fairly healthy. But a 15.5 year old animal that normally doesn't live much past 12 has problems. I couldn't take care of my mom, my other dog (the old man), the old woman (the girl dog), the house, myself with a broken arm, and anything else. Something had to go. You can all hate me for putting her humanely to sleep, but she was old. She had to have had some sort of arthritis, and other issues probably cancer somewhere and I can't imagine a rescue taking a dog that old. So I had her put to sleep. The vet told us we were doing the right thing for her. It broke my heart. I cried and cried because Josie my Poosiecat was my dog. She slept with me and she was my dog (even though she liked my Mom a lot better she was my dog and I was her person).
So my point is, if your sweet, beloved kitty is suffering are you keeping him alive for you or for him? Those are questions you have to ask yourself. This isn't easy. I hear you it isn't easy. It's an awful decision to make. I went to the vet today to ask her "Ok are we there and should we do this" and she said to me "We are close, but we aren't there yet."
Only you have the answer to this situation. My heart is heavy for you because I did go through this granted it was a canine and not a feline. The emotions are the same, though.
I wish you best of luck deciding what will work best for your critter and that your heart can rest knowing you have done the best for him. If it isn't time for him, that's fine, too. It's up to you. This is just what I had to do for Josie and our family.
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Post by Dixie Lou on Apr 8, 2016 1:20:17 GMT
Obviously it's a very tough decision. I have let a few of my dogs go too long. My latest pup was my 11 year old sheltie. Looking back I did notice a sign that he was sick. He started sleeping in the bed with me. Until then, he's start out on the bed but at some point he'd get on the floor. I think when he started staying on my bed all night was when he first started to suffer. At the time I had no idea because he still ate his food and he loved to play frisbee. He got to where he would hardly eat. His breath smelled bad and the vet said he needed a cleaning. So we did that. During the cleaning the vets noticed that his teeth were not connected to his jaw. They moved around!! So we thought that was the reason for him stopping eating. His teeth were perfect otherwise. About a week later was when we found out he was in kidney failure. I didn't want to leave him at the vet/hospitalize him so the vet let me take him home on an i.v. The hope was the fluids would make his kidney numbers go down. It didn't work. It was the first week back to school (teacher) so during our lunch time I went to the vet to visit him. (My daughter had taken him the day before. Monitoring an i.v. is not easy. Thank goodness for my cousin who is a nurse who got us through the weekend.) The vet tech brought him to me wrapped in a towel. I could hardly believe how far down he had come. I held him and sang to him and prayed to God that he would die in my arms before I had to leave. I made the decision to put him down if he kept hanging on. Then he passed away in my arms. My heart was broken and I still miss him so much. I am grateful to God that I was holding him as he passed away. I KNOW he was waiting for me.
It's never easy but it is easier on the pet. I didn't want to make that decision at that time and he passed away on his own. In retrospect I should have had him put down several days earlier. I just was so hoping the iv. would work.
You're in my thoughts and prayers.
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Post by beebee on Apr 8, 2016 2:40:35 GMT
I agree with the poster that said to ask about special diets for the diabetes. I had a cat that lived to be 22. We had her on a special diet and she did not jump on things for probably the last 4 years but she seemed fine up until the very end. I think I would involve the vet since she knows your cat. She can give you a better opinion on whether it is just natural slowing due to age or she is in pain.
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Post by peasapie on Apr 8, 2016 2:46:39 GMT
The difficulty in walking means she is very likely experiencing pain now. The weight loss is an additional issue that could be kidneys, cancer, etc. I went through something similar with my cat, and I did have to put him down. So sorry--I know it's not easy.
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Post by Dori~Mama~Bear on Apr 8, 2016 3:01:10 GMT
hugs to you and your kitty. I feel for you it is never easy to decide something like this. But it is ok to feel the way you feel. you know that deep down she would be more peaceful if she went without more added pain or discomfort.
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Post by stampnscrap1128 on Apr 8, 2016 3:13:48 GMT
Been in your shoes quite a few times. It's never easy. The most humane thing we can do for our pets is the most painful thing for us.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 8, 2016 4:52:20 GMT
I've read that rarely does anyone say they did it too soon, but often they say they waited a day too long.
I wish I could take away our chocolate lab's last day. I will say that I think he was pretty happy and somewhat comfortable up until the last day. His last day was bad, but we showered him with love (and lots and lots of chocolate) and had a vet come to our home because trying to get him in the car would have been nearly impossible (an immobile 120 dog) and he had gotten where he hated the car and the vet. It was a very peaceful ending for him at home.
If you think it's time, then it's probably time.
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