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Post by dealsamongus on Apr 24, 2016 7:49:22 GMT
A little backstory to the oddest friend request either my husband or I have ever received - I have been seeing this same PCP (Primary Care Doc) for the past 3 years - my husband has gone to about 1/4-1/2 the appointments with me, otherwise I go alone as Jason (my DH) works full time during the week and during regular office hours.
The doctor is nice enough, I mean he is a doctor and he chats with us, but we are NOT friends with him by ANY stretch, in fact Jason has not even seen him in a year (he started a new job that does not coincide with my doctor appointments). It is typical doctor/patient stuff and he is literally my fathers age (early to mid 70's).
We are paid in full with him so it is not seeking payment, we have a PPO Health plan (that covers visits to him) and I literally have not called the doctor for anything in at least a month (the last time was a maintenance med refill).
Why is he asking for my husband friendship on Facebook? Also of note, he did not ask for mine.
I know you all won't have the answer, but I am curious what your take on it is?
Jennifer (and Jason as my DH is curious as well)
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Deleted
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Sept 29, 2024 20:29:31 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 24, 2016 8:19:03 GMT
It's probably an accident.
Facebook uses an algorithm to select people who may move in the same circles and may be friends in real life. The Facebook app recommends people a user may know. Fb probably popped your dh up on the doctors feed as "a person you might know"...the name sounded familiar...so the doctor clicked.
Maybe he thinks he knows your husband from high school or maybe he knows someone else with a similar name. Maybe his publicist actually handles his Fb page and he has not idea about this drama. Maybe someone just click on the wrong check box?
Just ignore it. Or decline the friend request without another thought.
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Post by dealsamongus on Apr 24, 2016 8:33:42 GMT
It's probably an accident. Facebook uses an algorithm to select people who may move in the same circles and may be friends in real life. The Facebook app recommends people a user may know. Fb probably popped your dh up on the doctors feed as "a person you might know"...the name sounded familiar...so the doctor clicked. Maybe he thinks he knows your husband from high school or maybe he knows someone else with a similar name. Maybe his publicist actually handles his Fb page and he has not idea about this drama. Maybe someone just click on the wrong check box? Just ignore it. Or decline the friend request without another thought. Thanks for the response. I know it is not high school as there is a 30 year difference in age! It is the fact that he requested his friendship.. this was the doctors PERSONAL page, not the business. I am not his friend on FB so I am not sure the tie.. the doctor is not a careless guy, he would know he was clicking a friend request, we have had conversations about social media in the past given I am a blogger. It was that it came in a 11:40 at night and he did not ask for my friendship.. just strange! Jennifer |
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Deleted
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Sept 29, 2024 20:29:31 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 24, 2016 8:39:37 GMT
Maybe he's facebooking after having had a drink?
Facebook can be totally random.
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Post by dealsamongus on Apr 24, 2016 8:46:24 GMT
Maybe he's facebooking after having had a drink? Facebook can be totally random. You may be on to something!  |
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Post by mlynn on Apr 24, 2016 9:20:59 GMT
He could be friends with someone who has the same name.
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Post by dealsamongus on Apr 24, 2016 9:55:06 GMT
He could be friends with someone who has the same name. Might be but really rare name.. |
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Kerri W
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,788 
Location: Kentucky
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Post by Kerri W on Apr 24, 2016 9:57:01 GMT
Is he new to Facebook? Could it be one of those things where they ask people to suggest friends for him and you have somebody else in common who recommended your DH for him?
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Sept 29, 2024 20:29:31 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 24, 2016 10:50:59 GMT
I can't count how many times I have accidently clicked on my phone to send a friends request to someone who was suggested. In my defense my phone is tiny. It does confuse me sometimes as it will say so and so accepted your friend request. If I don't know someone, I am not adding them. I go back and undo it. So that may be the case. Like I said I don't even know until they have already accepted me.
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raindancer
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,095
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Post by raindancer on Apr 24, 2016 11:10:53 GMT
It's probably an accident. Facebook uses an algorithm to select people who may move in the same circles and may be friends in real life. The Facebook app recommends people a user may know. Fb probably popped your dh up on the doctors feed as "a person you might know"...the name sounded familiar...so the doctor clicked. Maybe he thinks he knows your husband from high school or maybe he knows someone else with a similar name. Maybe his publicist actually handles his Fb page and he has not idea about this drama. Maybe someone just click on the wrong check box? Just ignore it. Or decline the friend request without another thought. Thanks for the response. I know it is not high school as there is a 30 year difference in age! It is the fact that he requested his friendship.. this was the doctors PERSONAL page, not the business. I am not his friend on FB so I am not sure the tie.. the doctor is not a careless guy, he would know he was clicking a friend request, we have had conversations about social media in the past given I am a blogger. It was that it came in a 11:40 at night and he did not ask for my friendship.. just strange! Jennifer But if it was someone they both know it could happen. Say the doctor has a friend d who went to your dh high school, the algorithm could then see that connection and put your husband in the do you know line up. On your phone its super easy to accidentally click add as friend, I know because I randomly do this and usually catch it. But once a woman who was friends with my sister and also another friend got a friend request from me. I got the "who is this" message from her. |
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christinec68
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,379
Location: New York, NY
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Post by christinec68 on Apr 24, 2016 11:30:27 GMT
Maybe they have a friend in common and he recognized the name?
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lesley
Drama Llama
My best friend Turriff, desperately missed.
Posts: 7,292
Location: Scotland, Scotland, Scotland
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Post by lesley on Apr 24, 2016 11:41:32 GMT
Maybe he's madly in love with your husband, and thought this would be a way to contact him outwith your presence?  |
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Post by christine58 on Apr 24, 2016 11:46:01 GMT
He could be friends with someone who has the same name. Might be but really rare name.. Just don't accept it...I wouldn't worry about it so much honestly. |
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Post by melanell on Apr 24, 2016 12:09:11 GMT
I would assume it was an accident. FB is always throwing up suggestions of friends, and usually I ignore the suggestions, but occasionally a person will have many mutual friends, and I will be curious to see who the mutual friends are (This is especially true when I cannot place the suggested person.)
If you try doing that on a phone, though, I could easily see how you could accidentally hit the wrong thing.
I ignore friend requests fairly often. That's what I would do here.
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Post by baslp on Apr 24, 2016 12:10:44 GMT
I think my first thought would be -- well that's odd. Then I would just ignore it. If I may as, why does your DH go to your doctor apps? My DH has only went to 1 appt with me. I had to see a surgeon about removing my thyroid due to cancer.
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SabrinaP
Pearl Clutcher
Busy Teacher Pea
Posts: 4,405
Location: Dallas Texas
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Post by SabrinaP on Apr 24, 2016 12:23:30 GMT
I've totally clicked add friend by accident. Don't over think it. Ignore the request if you don't want him as a friend.
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Post by pierkiss on Apr 24, 2016 12:50:16 GMT
It was probably an accidental friend request while he was looking at the profiles of people he "knows". At the beginning of this school year I got a friend request from my daughters new 1st grade teacher. I had never even met the woman, and had no idea why she sent that to me. I sat on it for a few weeks and then accepted. A quick review of her friends showed me that she was not friends with any of the other parents in my daughters class. We absolutely believe that she was on facebook one day and decided to check out the pages of her new students parents to get a feel for the kids families. So she either accidentally hit the friend button as she was scrolling down the page, or really wanted to see what I have on my very locked down page! I didn't make a big thing out of it, I don't care, there's nothing bad on my facebook page. She actually apologized for it at parent teacher conferences and claimed she had no idea how it happened. Facebook stalking at its finest! |
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Post by gar on Apr 24, 2016 12:55:31 GMT
I would just ignore it and forget it. Who knows why it happened but there are quite a few possibilities that mean it really has no significance or untoward meaning.
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Deleted
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Sept 29, 2024 20:29:31 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 24, 2016 13:06:13 GMT
Maybe one of his grandchildren was playing with his phone or ipad?? The younger grandchildren in our family have accidentally (in some cases purposely) done similar things while helping the grandparents with technology.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Sept 29, 2024 20:29:31 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 24, 2016 13:06:23 GMT
Yeah, it's probably not anything nefarious or weird. Your husband probably has a friend, or a friend of a friend, in common with the doctor and he popped up as a suggested friend. Doctor may or may not have clicked on the friend request by mistake. I've done it.
I wouldn't worry about it -- but it does look weird. Probably unintentional.
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JustTricia
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,842
Location: Indianapolis
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Post by JustTricia on Apr 24, 2016 14:09:52 GMT
Or he could just be one of those people who needs ALL THE FRIENDS and requests anyone and everyone he sees.
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Post by Tamhugh on Apr 24, 2016 14:13:13 GMT
I have received more than one message that said, "so and so accepted your friend request" and I know that I did not (purposely) request them. Maybe he accidentally clicked it or it is just a facebook glitch.
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Post by katiejane on Apr 24, 2016 14:20:37 GMT
I wouldn't think about it too long. I suspect like others that it was an errant click. Sounds very much like a facebook suggested thing. I have all sorts of people pop up on my 'people you might know ' on my feed. They probably have friend or friends of friends in common.
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Post by myshelly on Apr 24, 2016 14:38:03 GMT
So he didn't send your DH a message, he just sent him a friend request?
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Post by *KAS* on Apr 24, 2016 14:47:12 GMT
He's 70. Maybe he doesn't know social media etiquette and thinks he should add people he sort of knows, and maybe your husband came up as 'people you may know.' Do they have mutual friends? Maybe it was an accident. Maybe it was a grandkid playing. Who knows. I'd probably think 'weird' then decline it.
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Post by CarolT on Apr 24, 2016 14:51:49 GMT
Another thing to consider is that he might make it a personal practice to not send friend requests to female patients. Perhaps you both came up as suggested friends and he decided to only send a request to you.
I would imagine lots of us have our own "policies" about who we send/accept requests. For example, I used to teach high school - I do not accept requests from former students, even after they have graduated. Many teachers accept friend requests after kids graduate.
Honestly, I wouldn't give it any more thought.
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Post by tinydogmafia on Apr 24, 2016 15:12:05 GMT
Your title says he sent your husband a message? So it's just a friend request?
Friend request is NBD, anyone can accidentally hit that.
Had he actually sent your husband a message, as your thread title implies, then I'd have a different response. Because the way you worded this thread, it's very misleading.
Friend request = ignore, no big deal
Message to husband about your health = very big deal
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Deleted
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Sept 29, 2024 20:29:31 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 24, 2016 15:19:49 GMT
FB gives me friend suggestions of people who I have email addresses for. I have a FB account just for playing games. I linked that account with the email I use for shopping, Craigslist, etc. On that FB account, I've seen some of the same people I've corresponded with as suggested people. I've also read that they mine info from your phone contacts. I can easily see how your DH might have popped up as a suggested friend and not knowing any better, he clicked the friend request.
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Post by tuva42 on Apr 24, 2016 15:24:12 GMT
A woman I know runs a FB page for a organization that I recently "liked" on Facebook. For some reason, FB suddenly sent out personal friend requests to everyone who had recently liked her organization page. She knew nothing about it. She messaged people and apologized for the requests. Maybe something like this happened to your doctor. Or his page could have been hacked. I know people who've lately posted that their pages have been hacked and friend requests have gone out without their knowledge.
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Post by melrose on Apr 24, 2016 15:31:53 GMT
Seems you are just as confused as the Doc may be. A friend request or a message was sent?
It's probably an error made by the Doc, I wouldn't read too much into it, really.
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