oldcrow
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,828
Location: Ontario,Canada
Jun 26, 2014 12:25:29 GMT
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Post by oldcrow on Apr 26, 2016 16:52:37 GMT
If so how many times (if you don't mind answering that)? And how many years were you married when it happened. In what year were you married?
You can add the reason for your divorce if you wish.
I simply wish to collect some data to fuel a discussion about divorce and what %age of marriages end in divorce. The Peas are a nice cross section society.
I worded my reason for wanting the info incorrectly. I actually want to get a feel for how many years married before divorcing. And the reason for divorcing. Also what decade the marriage took place.
It's a complicated argument but so far you guys are supporting my take on things when it comes to how long.
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Post by Lexica on Apr 26, 2016 16:58:10 GMT
I have been married and divorced once. We were married 10 years when we split, but had been together since meeting each other in junior high school. We were married in 1972. The divorce was due to his infidelity.
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Post by jeremysgirl on Apr 26, 2016 17:01:11 GMT
I have been divorced. My ex and I were together 12.5 years before we separated. Our actual divorce date was exactly 14 years to the day of our wedding. Married May 8, 1998 and divorced May 8, 2012. He is an alcoholic and he suffers from untreated depression. Seriously, I should have left five years sooner, when the drinking started.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Sept 29, 2024 14:20:04 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 26, 2016 17:09:28 GMT
My husband was married for a year and divorced. He was just 18 when he got married. She was 24 and it was the third marriage for her. She was bi-polar and spent most of their marriage Ina mental institution. Where she had sex with a fellow patient ( a lot), but you know it wasn't cheating , because she was in a hospital. When she got out, my husband's parents said she would stand over husband holding a knife, while he slept. He started sleeping at parent's house.
They separated. He moved out. He went out on a dinner date, home by 11. Spent most of the time out dancing with his parents. She served him divorce papers for cheating.
Btw. He has never really talked about this , just tells the bare minimum. His parents filled in the details. She on the other hand bad mouthed him to everyone. She would call his employers and she actually called potential employers.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Sept 29, 2024 14:20:04 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 26, 2016 17:12:02 GMT
I have been divorced. Married for 4 years two children....he was a lying cheating abusive bastard.... Remarried for 29 years with two more children to a wonderful man that sometimes pays the price for the first scumbag!
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Post by micpea on Apr 26, 2016 17:12:45 GMT
First marriage was in 1982, divorced in 2001. I was married for 19 years & divorced due to alcoholism. My husband was a drinker, every day - I just got tired of it & my goals were a lot higher than his. He didn't think he had a drinking problem! I did. I moved on.
I have been with my current husband (the 2nd) for 15 years, only married for 2
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Sept 29, 2024 14:20:04 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 26, 2016 17:17:16 GMT
Married in 2001, had a child, divorced in 2004. First marriage for both of us.
My ex has been engaged a couple time but as of yet has not remarried, though he does live with someone.
I will never get married again.
I always say I'm happily divorced.
eta: divorced I realized what an ass he is. I figure at least I learned my lesson quickly.
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Post by mom on Apr 26, 2016 17:18:17 GMT
First marriage ended with divorce. Ex had an affair. We never should have gotten married. It lasted 3.5 years. But we were separated the majority of the last year.
Met my (2nd) husband about 5 months after my divorce was final. We dated six weeks, got engaged and married six weeks afer that. Been married 14 years now.
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scorpeao
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,521
Location: NorCal USA
Jun 25, 2014 21:04:54 GMT
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Post by scorpeao on Apr 26, 2016 17:19:23 GMT
13 years. He had multiple affairs that I did not know about. When I finally caught on he couldn't promise it wouldn't happen again, so I noped out of my marriage.
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scrappert
Prolific Pea
RefuPea #2956
Posts: 7,956
Location: Milwaukee, WI area
Jul 11, 2014 21:20:09 GMT
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Post by scrappert on Apr 26, 2016 17:25:16 GMT
One marriage, one divorce. Married in July 3, 1993, final divorce date July 2, 2012 (one day short of 19 years). I left him in 2010 (16 years-almost 17 years). He was controlling and verbally abusive. One child.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Sept 29, 2024 14:20:04 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 26, 2016 17:31:22 GMT
If so how many times (if you don't mind answering that)? And how many years were you married when it happened. In what year were you married? You can add the reason for your divorce if you wish. I simply wish to collect some data to fuel a discussion about divorce and what %age of marriages end in divorce. The Peas are a nice cross section society. Married once. Married 1978 Married 26 years. On our 25th anniversary I had NO clue we would be separated and headed for divorce in 9 months. NONE. He threatened to kill me and I found out later he was cheating.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Sept 29, 2024 14:20:04 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 26, 2016 17:33:20 GMT
Married twice, divorced once.
Married in 2000 at 22 (he was 20). Divorced was finalized on my 26th birthday in 2004. Legally, we were married 4 years. We were separated during the last year. It's hard to pinpoint one reason but what started it all was a complete breakdown of communication. He didn't talk to me, I didn't talk to him. We talked to other people instead. He belittled me at times. We stopped trusting each other at some point. Honestly, we should've never married.
Second marriage in 2011, still going strong. Ex is supposedly engaged but he has not told me as much, just heard through the grapevine kind of thing. I don't care but I don't know why they're hiding it.
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Post by tenacious on Apr 26, 2016 17:46:46 GMT
I have only been married once, but DH was married before, for about 3 years. Infidelity on the wife's part. She married the other guy, eventually. DH and I married about 2.5 years after his divorce was final. Been married for 16 years this week! We went through a rough patch about 6 years ago, but came out stronger than ever. It takes work, but, we are both all in.
Erin
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Dalai Mama
Drama Llama
La Pea Boheme
Posts: 6,985
Jun 26, 2014 0:31:31 GMT
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Post by Dalai Mama on Apr 26, 2016 17:51:04 GMT
Married 20 years next month, never divorced.
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Post by JustCallMeMommy on Apr 26, 2016 17:58:42 GMT
Married and divorced once. We were married in 1997, and it lasted 16 years.
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Post by JoP on Apr 26, 2016 18:02:07 GMT
Married 25 years later this year. Neither of us have been married before
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Post by refugeepea on Apr 26, 2016 18:06:11 GMT
I hope to be be within the next 4 years. It will be 22 years.
The reason? Too many to list.
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Post by librarylady on Apr 26, 2016 18:07:46 GMT
Married and divorced 6 years later. No children. Reason: he could not keep a job because he would call in sick and go visit his parents (who lived 30 minutes away). He was angry because I would not spend every weekend at their home--yes, that meant overnight, because a visit of all afternoon was not enough.
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finaledition
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,896
Jun 26, 2014 0:30:34 GMT
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Post by finaledition on Apr 26, 2016 18:11:37 GMT
Married 25 years later this year. Neither of us have been married before Ditto
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Post by bigbundt on Apr 26, 2016 18:22:05 GMT
Married in 2000, divorced by 2003, no children. Happily remarried for almost eight years now.
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Post by mellowyellow on Apr 26, 2016 18:22:47 GMT
DH got married when he was 21 and she was 20. It lasted about 14 months. We got married, both were 24 and we will celebrate 22 years in September.
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Post by jemali on Apr 26, 2016 18:23:55 GMT
Married 25 years later this year. Neither of us have been married before Ditto Me too
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eastcoastpea
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,252
Jun 27, 2014 13:05:28 GMT
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Post by eastcoastpea on Apr 26, 2016 18:24:55 GMT
No.
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Post by giatocj on Apr 26, 2016 18:26:08 GMT
We were married in 1982, divorced in 1987 but remained the best of friends until his death 3 years ago. We were much, much, much better friends than we ever were as spouses. He was a good and kind man, I just couldn't be married to him.
I've been with my current boyfriend 19 years this May and we will be getting married in July, 2017. I needed to make sure we were compatible before I took the plunge again.
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Post by Anne-Marie on Apr 26, 2016 18:29:15 GMT
I am divorced. I've been married twice. The first was in 2002, and we separated almost 5 years later, our divorce was final right at the 5.5 year mark. We were a bad fit from the start, incompatible in all the ways that matter. He had full custody of his young special needs son from his first marriage and I fell for the kiddo hard. Most of my other friends were married and had started their families; I was approaching 30 years old and I think I felt I needed to seize the chance to have a marriage and family. We had a child together and she was 3 when our divorce was final.
I have been remarried for a year. My DH was married once before and had been widower for 5 years when we met.
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Post by KelleeM on Apr 26, 2016 18:29:18 GMT
Married in 1988 for 10 years. I left when I realized that my life was horrible and my kids were suffering. It's been 18 years and I think I dodged a bullet by leaving. He probably would have hurt me if I had stayed.
Married in 2013 to a man who had 4 previous marriages. We're a great match in spite of a 15 year age difference.
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julieb
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,845
Jul 3, 2014 16:02:54 GMT
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Post by julieb on Apr 26, 2016 18:30:34 GMT
Married 31 years to hs sweetheart. Together for 37 years. Ugh - where has time gone. 3 pretty good kids, youngest graduating from college in May!
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Post by gmcwife1 on Apr 26, 2016 18:34:08 GMT
We married when I was 18 and were married for 5 years. We divorced because of his drinking. He continued drinking and met his second wife in a bar. They had their wedding reception in the beer garden. He is now a recovering alcoholic and has been sober for several years, but it took a long time. He was also the one that called me a wetback and Spic even though I didn't know what they meant I was divorced for 10 years before marrying my current husband. We have been married for 18 years. He is also divorced due to his ex wife cheating on him with a shipmate. They were married for 10 yrs.
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Post by mommaho on Apr 26, 2016 18:37:00 GMT
Married May, 1978 - Divorced the lying cheating scum bag March 1980. Married my first love in April 1980 (yes, I know, quick turn around but ex and I had been separated for over 8 months) and today we celebrate 36 years.
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Post by terri on Apr 26, 2016 18:38:06 GMT
Married 25 years later this year. Neither of us have been married before Same
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