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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 2:04:59 GMT
Tomorrow we are taking DD (2.75 years old) to the dermatologist to have some moles checked out. I don't think the moles themselves are unhealthy -- I think they are of cosmetic concern. She has two large ones: one on her face, on her cheek, and another one on her back. They are already quite large and raised. One of our older DDs was born with a "birthmark" on her thigh, it was like a strawberry stain. By the time she was two it was a large, raised mole. Now it is huge, and very raised up -- and quite hairy. I wanted to have it removed when she was a preschooler, but she had such awful anxiety back then that doing ANYTHING with her was a stressful, horrible affair, and just thinking about having this mole removed, going to the doctor with her, etc, was more than I could deal with at the time. I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY regret not having it removed when she was a preschooler, because it's so big now. Anyway, that's why I want to have these moles on DD3 removed. Because I'm worried about what they might become. There's also another spot that I'm concerned about. It's right smack-dab in the middle of her nose. It just showed up when she was about 6 months old. It's flat, but definitely not a freckle. And it's doubled in size over the past year or so. You can see it in this photo: it's the mark right in the middle of her nose. It's sort of flat, and slightly pigmented, and sort of shiny. (the mark on the top right is a mosquito bite that is just healing up).  I just worry... not that it's cancerous or anything... but how awful it would be to have these two unsightly moles/blemishes on her face, plus this other one on her back (which is visible when she wears a bathing suit). So.. I have two types of questions. 1. Very practical: what kinds of things should I ask the doctor about tomorrow? I'm concerned about scarring now, but more concerned about what will happen if we don't have these moles removed now and they just grow and grow like her older sister's did. I'd rather have them removed now and hopefully have the skin heal and recover while she's younger. 2. Have you taken your children for cosmetic removal of moles? Did you regret it? 3. Does anyone have any experience with this not-mole mole thing on her nose? |
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Post by AN on Aug 1, 2014 2:10:08 GMT
I had one on my neck removed when I was 18 that really was a cosmetic issue, but it always bothered me. Every so often it would get a dark hair growing out of it - so gross. The doctor found some irregularity with it so was able to have it removed under insurance, and because it was in a visible place, she removed it with a surgical procedure rather than the usual "punch." I did have a big bandage on my neck for a few weeks, but once it healed it blended right in.
I'm very glad I had it removed (wish I'd had it done younger) and think you're totally right on with having it done when she is young. Good luck! I'm sure the doctor will have heard this concern before and be able to advise you on taking it off now.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 2:12:38 GMT
Thanks, AN! It is nice to hear from someone who's had firsthand experience. I am sure the doctor will have sound advice.  I just want to be prepared. |
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Post by miss_lizzie on Aug 1, 2014 2:20:21 GMT
I don't have any advice, but what a cutie patootie!
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 2:35:57 GMT
Thanks, @miss_lizzie! She is all kinds of precious and wonderful. |
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moodyblue
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Post by moodyblue on Aug 1, 2014 2:40:31 GMT
What an adorable face!
I'm glad you're having the spots checked out now. Are you going to do anything with your other daughter's spot?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 2:42:34 GMT
Yes, we need a referral to take her, but we're going to have it removed. She doesn't want to, but after talking about it for a while she's agreed that it's probably the best thing to do now.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 2:46:44 GMT
I would not have a dermatologist remove the moles, only a plastic surgeon. You will get much better long term results. Hmmm. I will ask about that tomorrow. I'm not sure I can just arrange for a plastic surgeon -- because we'd have to be referred by another doctor, who would be this dermatologist we're seeing tomorrow. |
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Post by AussieMeg on Aug 1, 2014 4:20:46 GMT
I would probably be inclined to wait until your DD wanted to get them removed herself. Maybe she will be really self conscious about them, maybe they won't worry her at all.
I had a mole on my tummy that I remember being really really self conscious about even when i was a young child, about 7yo. I use to stand with my arm covering it, and I often wore a one piece instead of a bikini so no one could see it. I didn't get it removed until I was about 20 and it was such a relief to me when I finally did it.
I have a gorgeous friend who has a mole on her face just under here eye. She had another mole removed from her face but it left a scar so she decided against having the one under her eye removed. Personally I think I'd prefer a small scar to a mole. My friend has amazing self confidence though, definitely more so than I do.
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tracylynn
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Post by tracylynn on Aug 1, 2014 5:09:09 GMT
I would not have a dermatologist remove the moles, only a plastic surgeon. You will get much better long term results. Hmmm. I will ask about that tomorrow. I'm not sure I can just arrange for a plastic surgeon -- because we'd have to be referred by another doctor, who would be this dermatologist we're seeing tomorrow. There are Doctors who are plastic surgeons who specialize in this type of stuff - especially for skin cancer (not saying this is, just as an example). But I agree - if you can go to the plastic surgeon, especially since we're talking about her face, I would. Good luck! |
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Post by anniefb on Aug 1, 2014 6:31:24 GMT
What a cutie! I had a couple of moles removed as a teen. I've also had a couple which just went away on their own.
Unless they require removal now for medical reasons, I would be tempted to wait until she's a bit older to see whether she starts asking if they can be removed. I think it could be quite a traumatic procedure for a young child, especially dealing with the face.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 7:33:00 GMT
I have 2 second hand experiences. I have a bestie from grade school who had a huge, huge hairy, black birthmark on her eyebrow and forehead removed. It also extended to the crease of her eye. Her mother got it removed when she was very young and the surgeon didn't do a good job. The bestie used to tell us the funniest stories about it. She was as a child and is as an adult one of the most beautiful women in the world.
My first cousin large, raised black ones in her armpit and on her back removed when she was young. She remembers very little other than they weren't cancerous. But that could be what her mother told her at the time.
Both women healed up and look wonderful.
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TankTop
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Post by TankTop on Aug 1, 2014 12:41:40 GMT
Dd had several spots like the one you are describing on your dd's nose. We took her to a pediatric derm because they changed shape and color often. They tested them to determine they were not cancerous, but suggested we not remove them until she was older.
We were told that they would grow back at that age because of the hyper pigmentation of a young child's skin.
I thought the doc was full of it until the area they removed for testing was back within a month. When'd was older it was no longer needed. Her hairline changed and covered hers.
My point is, ask wether or not they will grow back after removal
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 12:52:30 GMT
Thanks, TankTop, we will! I am feeling very guilty and anxious over the possibility of choosing to have the moles removed, because I think it's a cosmetic choice, not a medically necessary one. But I DO think, based on older DD's experience, that it really is the best choice. It's tempting to wait but if they grow so much larger like our other DD's did, then they are going to be just that much deeper and harder to remove and leave an even bigger scar, yk? |
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Post by Scrapbrat on Aug 1, 2014 13:03:01 GMT
You are comparing your younger DD's moles to your older DD's birthmark, and those aren't the same thing at all. I wouldn't be beating myself up about your older DD's birthmark. The fact that it's grown so much probably indicates that it's connected to the blood supply, and they might not have been able to remove it earlier anyway. I agree about having a plastic surgeon do any actual cutting or surgery on your DD's face. My DS ripped his earlobe (shudder) when he was in first grade, and it was recommended to us to have a plastic surgeon repair it. We are so glad that we did, because it healed amazingly, without even a trace of a scar.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Aug 1, 2014 13:42:16 GMT
If it is possible, have it removed now. Even if it is just for cosmetic reasons. And do try to have a cosmetic surgeon do it. The results will be a millions times better in the long run.
I was born with a very visible mole on my face. As i got older, it grew along with me. When I was in my twenties and became pregnant, it grew even more. And with each subsequent pregnancy it grew.
I finally had it removed in my thirties after it changed in a way that I feared might be cancer related, and although I had a plastic surgeon do it, the scar is still slightly visible. It would have been a much smaller scar if I had had the procedure done when the mole was much smaller.
I went through years of people making comments about my mole. I was always self conscious and felt ugly.
Save your dd years of heartache and make it your problem to handle and correct now instead of waiting until she is an adult and then becomes her problem to deal with.
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quiltz
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Post by quiltz on Aug 1, 2014 14:27:03 GMT
Dr. Bush (Martindale Plaza) is excellent.
Dr. Huq in Niagara Falls is also excellent.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 14:56:03 GMT
quiltz, we saw Dr. Sloan today, he was very nice, although quite rushed. We were referred to a plastic surgeon. The doctor agreed that it was an important cosmetic issue, especially the one on her nose -- of course I can't remember what he called it now, I think he said it was just a benign mole. @scrapbrat, the reason I'm comparing them is because they are very, very similar. They started out the same looking and look similar now. Especially the one on younger DD's nose.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 15:16:30 GMT
Wow, Benem, I'm not sure what I've said that makes you think this: but I can guarantee you that neither of my children have ever, ever, ever heard me discuss their moles being a problem. We don't even ever talk about them. I think the first time I ever even mentioned DD1's mole to her was about 6 months ago when we decided to have her's and DD3's looked at after taking younger DD to the doctor. I tell my girls every day that they are the most beautiful people I've ever seen. I have never, ever made them feel like they are defective.  |
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 15:19:53 GMT
Yes, it is a cosmetic issue. Because I don't want her to grow a huge gigantic hairy mole any bigger on her face. Because *I* will love her no matter what, but other people may not. I'm sorry if you find that offensive.
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quiltz
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Post by quiltz on Aug 1, 2014 15:26:56 GMT
I totally agree with you Ashley to get this looked after asap. OHIP will cover these procedures until a child is 18, then it is out-of-pocket payment. We live in an area where the rate of skin cancer is abnormally large.
DO get the procedures done, and as early as possible. You are the mother, you know your children and you WILL do the best for them.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 15:30:53 GMT
Thanks, quiltz. The doctor today was pretty confident that there is no concern of cancer, which is what I felt based on some google experience. As a mole-y and pale family, we check ours pretty frequently. We're going to see the plastic surgeon and see what he says. I will trust his opinion regarding if/when they should be removed. I asked the doctor today about whether cosmetic concerns were valid or not, and he very quickly agreed, which I really appreciated because I do feel slightly conflicted over our decision to look into having them removed -- even though I think it's for the best, I do feel guilty for voluntarily causing my children a small amount of stress and worry about judgment from others. |
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Post by utmr on Aug 1, 2014 15:36:26 GMT
Because I don't want her to grow a huge gigantic hairy mole any bigger on her face.. And this is a valid reason to get it removed. We're not talking about a nose job for a toddler, but removal of an unsightly mole from her face. If it was somewhere not visible then I can see maybe waiting. But on the face there is no upside to waiting and removing it now would reduce the chances of her being picked on or feeling bad. Yes, lots of people grow up with birthmarks and are just fine. But if OP wants it fixed, and is in a position to make it happen, then it's none of our business. Back to the original question: I would ask about scarring, whether it could grow back, if a plastic surgeon is advised, how it can be done with the least amount of risk and pain for the child. |
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 15:40:36 GMT
Thanks, utmr! We will be seeing a plastic surgeon! The dermatologist had the referral ready before he even saw us! He said the plastic surgeon we are seeing is great with pediatric cases. I think my biggest concern is scarring... but the derm said the plastic surgeon would be able to advise us on when to remove them and the risk of scarring now vs waiting. I guess I just want to be sure that she isn't left with a scar that is just as noticeable as the mole. Which is most of the reason we are looking into having this done now vs letting her decide when she is an adult, hoping that while she is young and the mole is small that it will heal better. |
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 15:42:11 GMT
I have a birthmark on my face and it is ugly. It is very light, on my jaw line and is not removable without a large scar. I wish a laser or something could zap it. I may have it removed I hate it that badly. Ashley you are doing the right thing!  |
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 15:47:11 GMT
Thanks, Delta Dawn. I have a huge mole on the side of my head, but it is under my hair. It was just a tiny little spot when I was born, but now it is quite big. I've had it looked at, but doctors have said there is no concern of cancer but it would be very hard to remove because it has grown so big and deep. I'm very fortunate that it isn't visible and it doesn't cause me any problems. I just can't have my hair cut very short since it is visible through short hair. |
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Post by Basket1lady on Aug 1, 2014 15:59:37 GMT
Based on the history with your other DD, I think you are smart to ask now. A reputable dr will be able to advise you as to the best course of action. Since you are willing to take the advice of a professional, I think you are doing the right thing.
Benem has a point about loving ourselves for who we are. But the thing is that you can't predict how the mole will grow or how your DD will feel about a mole when she's older. I know my kids would have picked at a bump on their face, causing other issues.
Two words of experience. DS had a large mass removed from his back shoulder blade when he was 12 months old. The scar grew with him and never went away. But it wasn't done by a plastic surgeon. The mass was very close to the surface of the skin and they went after it aggressively because they were concerned it was cancer., so may have contributed to the scarring.
When DD was 4, she was holding the dog's leash and was drug off her bike. She had a large patch of road rash on her arm that was kept as a wet wound for about 2 months. When it healed, she had a dark patch on her arm that came back more with sun exposure. I coated her in high SPF sunscreen (DH called it moon block) and that helped. It has faded over the years, but took about 5-7 years before it really wasn't noticeable. She's 15 now and I can only see it if she's been out in the sun and I'm looking for it.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 16:43:31 GMT
Thanks, Michelle, you make some great points. It's not an easy decision and there are so many unknowns to try to predict and consider.
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Post by lily on Aug 1, 2014 18:00:23 GMT
I think you are a good concerned parent to have these checked out now.
Has your older daughter had the one on her leg removed now?
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Post by Deleted on Aug 1, 2014 18:41:03 GMT
I think you are a good concerned parent to have these checked out now. Has your older daughter had the one on her leg removed now? Not yet, we have an appointment to see our GP so we can have a referral to the dermatologist. |
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I just want to be prepared.
