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Post by refugeepea on Jun 22, 2016 15:24:41 GMT
I guess I'd have to say #2. I would have skipped the party then #1, and 2 are not an issue.
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Post by papersilly on Jun 22, 2016 16:51:23 GMT
hard to say. #1 is just rude. #2 could be dangerous. #3 is just lazy.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 22, 2016 16:57:48 GMT
One thing I learned pretty early on with twins was to request they be on the same teaching team (started in 3rd grade though). That way, when parties happened, usually the team combined classes or shared the party between them. That really really helped in twin sibling situations!
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Post by secondlife on Jun 22, 2016 17:05:39 GMT
hard to say. #1 is just rude. #2 could be dangerous. #3 is just lazy. It's lazy not to go to your kid's class party when your childcare arrangement falls through because the nanny is in the hospital, and you don't have a last minute plan B? I was at my DD's class party yesterday and there were two moms there out of 30 kids. Lots of lazy moms there I guess. I would probably have spoken to the classroom teacher and asked if she had a suggestion. Maybe the other child could have gone to the library or used a classroom computer or something, or maybe there's no wiggle room and that's fine too. Things happen and most of the time we will go out of our way to help out a mom although sometimes we can't. I would have no problem with the other child sitting in the hall with my phone either. I don't think a kindergartener should play alone in the playground, although for my specific school in my specific area I would have no problem with a second or third grader or older playing there without adult supervision. I guess another option might have been to ask if the other sibling could hang out with a mom from his class a while. But sometimes you don't know the other moms well enough to have that option. |
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Post by epeanymous on Jun 22, 2016 17:19:01 GMT
One thing I learned pretty early on with twins was to request they be on the same teaching team (started in 3rd grade though). That way, when parties happened, usually the team combined classes or shared the party between them. That really really helped in twin sibling situations! We're having them back in the same class next year (they shared a classroom in pre-K). They did well both apart and together, and they made pretty much all of the same friends despite being in separate classes. They wanted to try being together again, and for a lot of logistical reasons (like this!), it is easier for us, so, with the approval of their teachers this year and the principal, we're giving it a whirl. I am a little edgy about it because they are identical, but at least they have stopped insisting on dressing in coordinating clothes  , and the teacher they will have already knows them separately, so I am not concerned at least that the teacher won't get to know them as different people. If it's a bust, we'll be right back to separate classes, and if there is team teaching, that's a great point to try to get them with separate teachers who are on the same team (the elementary schools here tend to start it in fourth grade). |
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Post by papersilly on Jun 22, 2016 18:15:26 GMT
hard to say. #1 is just rude. #2 could be dangerous. #3 is just lazy. It's lazy not to go to your kid's class party when your childcare arrangement falls through because the nanny is in the hospital, and you don't have a last minute plan B? I was at my DD's class party yesterday and there were two moms there out of 30 kids. Lots of lazy moms there I guess. you are right. lazy is probably not the right word for every mom who doesn't attend. i will agree with the phrase another pea used then--- "non-issue". |
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Post by 5peanutsnana on Jun 22, 2016 18:28:32 GMT
I think some are interpreting your question wrong. OP asked which is worse.
I would never let a young child unattended for any amount of time. The consequences could be life changing, but then I'm a Grandma.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 22, 2016 18:37:54 GMT
One thing I learned pretty early on with twins was to request they be on the same teaching team (started in 3rd grade though). That way, when parties happened, usually the team combined classes or shared the party between them. That really really helped in twin sibling situations! We're having them back in the same class next year (they shared a classroom in pre-K). They did well both apart and together, and they made pretty much all of the same friends despite being in separate classes. They wanted to try being together again, and for a lot of logistical reasons (like this!), it is easier for us, so, with the approval of their teachers this year and the principal, we're giving it a whirl. I am a little edgy about it because they are identical, but at least they have stopped insisting on dressing in coordinating clothes , and the teacher they will have already knows them separately, so I am not concerned at least that the teacher won't get to know them as different people. If it's a bust, we'll be right back to separate classes, and if there is team teaching, that's a great point to try to get them with separate teachers who are on the same team (the elementary schools here tend to start it in fourth grade).
I think Senior English was the only class that they ever shared at the same time with the same teacher. I liked teams also because then they had the same homework and the teachers only had one at a time.
We had a horrible time in 2nd grade because one teacher sent home a lot of work and the other sent home none. Their teaching styles were so different and honestly both girlies fell behind that year.
Mine are virtually identical (although fraternal).... they go to different universities and just in the past few months they have met someone who picked them out because they were like "do you have a sister?twin? who goes to x university ? (in a different state with no other connections)" It's been a little freaky how small the world is....
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Post by peanuttle on Jun 22, 2016 18:48:27 GMT
#2 if you are going to be at the same school, or if there are already kids and teachers onsite. DS school says no kids before 7:30am, but there are a ton of kids and teachers there by 7:15 (not that that makes it right, but 1 time wouldn't kill anyone IMO).
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Post by auntkelly on Jun 22, 2016 19:03:56 GMT
#1 is the worse for me. #3 wouldn't be a problem. Then again, I had a mother who worked full time in the 60's when most moms didn't and never had a parent at a class party or school assembly. I survived quite well in spite of it!  Skipping a kids class party would definitely fall under the FWP category for me. I could have written this post word for word. My my mom missed a lot of activities, but I didn't grow up to be an axe murderer-at least not yet. |
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Post by Lindarina on Jun 22, 2016 19:35:14 GMT
#1 is never an option!
One of my collegues (I'm a teacher) told me about a family that usually brought their toddler to "no siblings-events". Once, this sibling ended up destroying the decorations that the students had spent hours making. The parents were dimwits.
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Post by anonrefugee on Jun 22, 2016 22:06:21 GMT
Why not wait 15min for supervision on the playground and then go to the party late? As a parent and a former teacher I can't stand the chaos of class parties. But as a parent I've learned that I should show up to some to meet other parents. I reluctantly agree to attend 1 or 2 a year per kid. The wisdom of a teacher, a fifteen minute delay! Thank you!!!!! |
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Post by vicloo on Jun 22, 2016 23:41:42 GMT
I agree with 2-1-3.
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Post by refugeepea on Jun 22, 2016 23:52:20 GMT
My my mom missed a lot of activities, but I didn't grow up to be an axe murderer-at least not yet. I was the youngest of 5. I think my mom was so over it by the time I came along.  It also wasn't a thing for moms to be at class parties. Usually just a couple of them to help with games and food. |
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Post by maryland on Jun 22, 2016 23:55:04 GMT
Well, as a single mother who doesn't believe in leaving her children with any one, I would of course take the littlest anxious child alone with me to the party. I couldn't even imagine missing that amazing moment with my child. The teacher won't care, it's the last day-nothing is going on and one more child won't make a difference. And besides, youngest anxious child is SO well behaved that no one will hardly know he is there. Ha. No, the reality is that you don't go. Plenty of kids have parents who can't make it to their school parties and of all the ways we can screw up our kids, missing the last day of school party is so far down on the list that it is hardly worth mentioning. Unless you are Martyr Mommy and spend the rest of the day apologizing to your snowflake and tearing up while telling them how sad you are to have missed their most special party ever. At that point, counseling is probably a good idea. Haha, I thought you were serious first and I thought that doesn't sound like anxiousmom!  |
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Mary Kay Lady
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Post by Mary Kay Lady on Jun 23, 2016 2:35:44 GMT
Option #2 is the worst. In this day and age I can't imagine leaving a child unattended.
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Post by 950nancy on Jun 23, 2016 3:13:21 GMT
Why not wait 15min for supervision on the playground and then go to the party late? As a parent and a former teacher I can't stand the chaos of class parties. But as a parent I've learned that I should show up to some to meet other parents. I reluctantly agree to attend 1 or 2 a year per kid. The wisdom of a teacher, a fifteen minute delay! Thank you!!!!! Or hang out with your kid outside for 15 minutes and then join the party with the other kid. |
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Post by 950nancy on Jun 23, 2016 3:14:37 GMT
We frequently had kids left outside the school for up to an hour before it started with only the last 15 minutes with supervision. It blew me away how many parents knew the doors were locked but left for work anyway.
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, and the teacher they will have already knows them separately, so I am not concerned at least that the teacher won't get to know them as different people.
Skipping a kids class party would definitely fall under the FWP category for me.
It also wasn't a thing for moms to be at class parties. Usually just a couple of them to help with games and food.
