peabrain
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,588
Jun 25, 2014 22:18:04 GMT
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Post by peabrain on Jul 18, 2018 17:43:38 GMT
CRAZY out there idea but research it, I don't know. But we're a family of 3 and when I'm booking my daughter is like 50% off when staying in the same cabin. So would the sister go with ya'll and watch the baby??? Just an idea. Maybe best of both worlds? Or see what a second cabin would be??? I don't know I'm not a Travel Agent but maybe it could work??? And you wouldn't get murdered??
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 26, 2024 14:51:30 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 18, 2018 17:57:50 GMT
This is a decision you and your wife need to make together. She may have another idea that would work better for everyone.
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Post by redshoes on Jul 18, 2018 18:04:00 GMT
vacation = mom and dad ONLY family outing = mom, dad and kid(s) ![:)](//storage.proboards.com/5645536/images/MNrJDkDuSwqIMVw33MdD.jpg) Take the vacay...it will really help both of you and your child in the long run. Involve wife in vacation planning...surprise her with "we are going" but include her in where/when, etc., especially if she is nursing.
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tracylynn
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,884
Jun 26, 2014 22:49:09 GMT
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Post by tracylynn on Jul 18, 2018 18:11:40 GMT
We're more or less a single-income family, with my wife Evi bearing more than 50% of the child care since I'm working a lot of hours. She's a wonderful mother, but I'm starting to get the look. You know the one I'm talking about. Like, if I come home late one more time I might get stabbed. I'm kidding, but I really am worried about her burning out. I try to do most of the child care on weekends, but after working 50-60 hour weeks, I'm burning out. Of course, we both know we signed up for this when we decided to start a family. And we'll be fine. But we're thinking we need a vacation. Nothing crazy, which is why we like the idea of a cruise. They basically do all the thinking for you! We've come up with three options: - Taking a cruise with the baby.
- Taking a cruise without the baby, having my sister come down and babysit for five days.
- Not cruising at all, perhaps doing something more baby-friendly
I'm scared to death of the nasty viruses that seem to plague cruises. I caught one once and wanted to die. I definitely don't want my baby to catch one. I'm also scared about leaving our baby behind for five days. I'm not sure how wife and baby both will handle it. Though Evi seems to be leaning towards leaving Sasha with my sister.
What are your thoughts? Experiences?
Thanks!
Go on a cruise WITHOUT the baby. Take a vacation. I've been in 8 cruises and never been sick. Just be super cautious of touching things, then your face, without washing your hands. Use the liquid stuff they throw at you every time you enter the restaurants and have a great time!
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Post by utmr on Jul 18, 2018 18:23:59 GMT
My kids are all teens and above. When they were little we didn't go on vacation much because of similar worries - what if they cry, we can't go on excursions, they won't remember. In hindsight we should have just gone. Now that they are "old enough" they are busy with life and we have mostly missed that window of opportunity.
As a working mom, I missed so much during the day that I didn't want to waste vacation without them. Plus we usually had to burn vacation days when they were sick, that it seemed reckless to waste them on ourselves.
If I could do it all over again I would pack them up and take them. No you won't be able to go dancing all night, or zip line in the jungle. But sitting in the baby pool or on the shady beach sounds like a lovely thing to do.
One of you can have a nice nap every day with the baby while the other one has a couple hours of grown-up time. Inside cabins are dark, so save money and sleep well.
I say go for it and have fun!
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Post by iamkristinl16 on Jul 18, 2018 18:32:48 GMT
I would go on a vacation without the baby. We went on a cruise in 2001. Things may have changed, but I don't recall the ship being that baby friendly. The excursions weren't baby friendly, meals would have been more of a hassle, adult time would be difficult, and the rooms are tiny. If you are going to take the baby with you on vacation, I would do something else. But really, an 11 month old is not going to get much out of a vacation except be more cranky because she is out of her element. There is a saying..."There is no going on vacation with kids. You are just parenting in a different location." I agree with that. I also would say that if either of you get motion sickness, rethink the cruise. I was sick the whole time.
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Post by Darcy Collins on Jul 18, 2018 18:39:59 GMT
We took our kids when they were 2 and 3 year on a Disney cruise. I'm not really a cruiser, but that was an awesome vacation. They have SO much for the little ones and were so excited to go see Peter Pan or whatever. We had plenty of alone time and it was probably the easiest family vacation we've ever been on. We left them a few times when they were really little - once for 4-5 days when they were 1 and 2 and once for 10 days when they were 3 and 4. 10 days was way too long at that age.
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Post by hop2 on Jul 18, 2018 18:46:49 GMT
I vote go on vacation without the baby. You said she would be fine, you have trusted child care. Put your self & your wife first. Give her the time off she needs. Maybe instead of a cruise a couples spa? Total relaxation. Whatever your wife wants, make it about you & her and time together. Oh, and pack your own stuff for vacation so she doesn’t have to.
The best thing you and your lovely wife can do for Sasha is pay attention to your relationship with each other. So your on the right track!!
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Post by slowjoe on Jul 18, 2018 20:16:10 GMT
Just to throw another option out there...... What about leaving the baby with your sister but driving to a more local destination that gives you the option of returning early? You might be able to relax more if you aren't stuck on a ship and know that you have an "out" if you can't stand it. Have fun! I'd really like to do this, but the problem is we live in SW Florida, and there's nowhere to really go within eight hours' drive that will give us an experience we can't already have by going to our local beach. The closest mountains (something we'd probably both like to experience again) are in Georgia. Anything else that would be a real "getaway" would require an airplane. And honestly, as much as I'd rather do something more sporting or challenging or outdoorsy, a cruise is easy. And I think that's what we need right now.
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Post by slowjoe on Jul 18, 2018 20:18:36 GMT
CRAZY out there idea but research it, I don't know. But we're a family of 3 and when I'm booking my daughter is like 50% off when staying in the same cabin. So would the sister go with ya'll and watch the baby??? Just an idea. Maybe best of both worlds? Or see what a second cabin would be??? I don't know I'm not a Travel Agent but maybe it could work??? And you wouldn't get murdered?? I don't think that'd work. I know my wife; she'd take over the caregiving. The only way she'd give that up is to have a massive body of water in between mother and child. ![:D](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/grin.png)
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Post by ScrapbookMyLife on Jul 18, 2018 20:42:23 GMT
First time, why not start on a smaller scale. Travel to where your Sister is, leave the baby with her. Go somewhere within an hour or two. Go for a long weekend. Then with time, you can increase your time length and distance.
Children or not, sometimes one just needs a break. Sleep interrupted, rest, eat out, get takeout, pickup up simple ready made meals to re-heat, ....doing something(activities) or doing nothing, sometimes it's just what one's needs.
I am single, no kids. Sometimes, I give myself a mini staycation. I stay home for three days straight. Sleep, read, do craft projects, order delivery food/meals. Self care is very necessary for one's well being.
Whatever you decide to do, enjoy it.
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Post by bearmom on Jul 18, 2018 23:19:01 GMT
My “babies” are 18 and 16. Dh and I started leaving them with family when older dd was 9 months old and did it regularly (yearly) since then. It was hard the first time we left them, but it was good overall. We have no family in the immediate area (4 hours is the closest). Both dds are no worse for wear and leaving them helped them have better relationships with their grandparents.
It it has been good for dh and I to spend some quality alone time with each other and maintain our relationship through the various challenges of being married and raising kids. We both look forward to our annual trip away still.
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Post by Really Red on Jul 19, 2018 0:32:07 GMT
I went on my first cruise this past year. I need to tell you I ridiculously love kids, I do, but there's a time and place. Disney Cruise? Go for it. Adult cruise? Think about it. There was a young couple with two beautiful toddlers who never - not never ever - shut up. I did a river cruise, so we are a small group and it was impossible to get away. By the end of the tour, they got a bus to themselves because everyone couldn't be with them anymore. It was exhausting. The kids were not bad at all, they were just incessantly noisy.
Maybe you can find an all-inclusive for 4 days so that your sister has time to be with the baby a bit, and you can escape if things get bad. You can't escape a cruise. You are a good partner to think of your wife.
p.s. I agree with others about taking a vacation for you. My kids (I had 3 under 3) were with me all the time. They were GREAT and we never had an issue, but you know what I remember? Running after kids, cooking and cleaning all the time. You know what my kids remember? Absolutely SQUAT. Their dad left when the youngest was 8 and the older ones were 11. They barely remember life with him.
Go without the baby.
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Post by marzbar71 on Jul 19, 2018 12:53:56 GMT
I'm all in favor of you and Evi getting a couple of days away - AND I think it would be great for your sister to have some time with Sasha and your dad. But a 5 day cruise doesn't seem like the best first trip away. I vote for a fancy hotel in Tampa for the weekend with a spa. Get a couples massage, go to an art museum, eat a fancy dinner that requires multiple forks, find a concert or play to go to. Maybe a walking photography tour for Evi. Tampa Photo Tour
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Post by guzismom on Jul 19, 2018 13:18:26 GMT
Leave the baby home.
Everyone on that ship, including your wife, will thank you.
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Post by cadoodlebug on Jul 19, 2018 14:27:04 GMT
When our son was 11-months old we left him for 8 days with my sister while we went to Hawaii. Then we did it again when he was about 3. He LOVED those weeks with his aunt and we loved having an romantic vacation. We finally took him with us when he was in 5th grade!
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Post by **Angie** on Jul 19, 2018 19:59:44 GMT
I'm with Marzbar.
A whole week away, on a trip that you can't just decide in the middle of the night that you have to get home just because, for your first trip.
No. Hell no.
Find some decadent adults-only place in the center of the state. Or a super-touristy, feared-by-locals, town. Go and relax in the knowledge that you can go home if you need/want to but you aren't because you and Evi are strong-willed adults that know Sasha is being cared for.
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keithurbanlovinpea
Pearl Clutcher
Flowing with the go...
Posts: 4,285
Jun 29, 2014 3:29:30 GMT
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Post by keithurbanlovinpea on Jul 19, 2018 20:43:11 GMT
I guess I should clarify something: Sasha will almost undoubtedly be fine if we leave her behind. Our worries are probably more selfish. I'm concerned that Evi may freak after 48 hours of no contact with our baby. Also, Sasha is seemingly learning something new every day. If Evi says, "where's your Mischka?" she crawls over to her teddy bear. She can't say anything other than "mamamama" yet but she's understanding words! What if we leave for five days, come back and she's already composing hypotheses on Quantum Theory? I wouldn't be able to live with myself for missing that. Wait until she's a teenager and does new stuff all the time without you being there 😉
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Post by annabella on Jul 19, 2018 20:51:03 GMT
Taking a cruise without the baby, having my sister come down and babysit for five days. This will be perfect. You two can reconnect. You won't have to be pushing a stroll down the beach. You won't have to pack a ton of diapers, etc.
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Post by buddysmom on Jul 19, 2018 20:59:05 GMT
I went on my first cruise this past year. I need to tell you I ridiculously love kids, I do, but there's a time and place. Disney Cruise? Go for it. Adult cruise? Think about it. There was a young couple with two beautiful toddlers who never - not never ever - shut up. I did a river cruise, so we are a small group and it was impossible to get away. By the end of the tour, they got a bus to themselves because everyone couldn't be with them anymore. It was exhausting. The kids were not bad at all, they were just incessantly noisy. Maybe you can find an all-inclusive for 4 days so that your sister has time to be with the baby a bit, and you can escape if things get bad. You can't escape a cruise. You are a good partner to think of your wife. p.s. I agree with others about taking a vacation for you. My kids (I had 3 under 3) were with me all the time. They were GREAT and we never had an issue, but you know what I remember? Running after kids, cooking and cleaning all the time. You know what my kids remember? Absolutely SQUAT. Their dad left when the youngest was 8 and the older ones were 11. They barely remember life with him. Go without the baby. They took their toddlers on a river cruise? We've taken our kids many places when they were little (all kid-appropriate) but I would be really upset if they were on a river cruise and acting like, well, kids after we spent all that $$$.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 26, 2024 14:51:30 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 20, 2018 1:30:14 GMT
It’s not really a vacation if you take the baby.
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quiltz
Drama Llama
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Posts: 6,741
Location: CANADA
Jun 29, 2014 16:13:28 GMT
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Post by quiltz on Jul 20, 2018 1:51:46 GMT
I went on my first cruise this past year. I need to tell you I ridiculously love kids, I do, but there's a time and place. Disney Cruise? Go for it. Adult cruise? Think about it. There was a young couple with two beautiful toddlers who never - not never ever - shut up. I did a river cruise, so we are a small group and it was impossible to get away. By the end of the tour, they got a bus to themselves because everyone couldn't be with them anymore. It was exhausting. The kids were not bad at all, they were just incessantly noisy. Maybe you can find an all-inclusive for 4 days so that your sister has time to be with the baby a bit, and you can escape if things get bad. You can't escape a cruise. You are a good partner to think of your wife. p.s. I agree with others about taking a vacation for you. My kids (I had 3 under 3) were with me all the time. They were GREAT and we never had an issue, but you know what I remember? Running after kids, cooking and cleaning all the time. You know what my kids remember? Absolutely SQUAT. Their dad left when the youngest was 8 and the older ones were 11. They barely remember life with him. Go without the baby. ^^^ That would make me ![>:D](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/superangry.png) . River cruises are Very Expensive. I have been on two of them and they were wonderful, serene and calming to me. Having toddlers would incense me. Might as well burn the $$$. Go alone on a cruise or to a hotel for the weekend. For the sake of others who are seeking peace & quiet, don't take a baby.
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Post by candygurl on Jul 20, 2018 3:55:44 GMT
I’m the odd one and say take the baby with you. Cruises are much more baby friendly than in the past. It would be hard for me to leave a baby that age for 5 days. Maybe when she is 2-3 yrs would be better. Up to you really! If you want a true vacation, leave her with your sister. If you want a family vacation, take the baby!
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Post by ~summer~ on Jul 20, 2018 4:00:40 GMT
I would definitely leave the baby with family. It isn’t that big of a deal. You guys need a break.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Jul 20, 2018 4:17:59 GMT
Take it from someone who hasn't been able to have a date night with my husband in 9 years (no one to watch the kids).....go by yourselves. You will both be in need of a break by then and it would really mean some great quality time together. When the baby gets older there will be plenty of family fun vacations you will take. I would give anything to go away with my husband for a few days! ![:yeahthat:](//storage.proboards.com/5645536/images/yrGoHMAelQz8f2Qt0sjb.jpg) Only my kid is eight. We have no one at all we feel comfortable leaving our DD with for a whole week. We’ve gone out to dinner together without her exactly twice since she was born. Once was for DH’s sister’s birthday and the other was a work function for DH so neither event was exactly what I’d call romantic. Since you have the option of leaving your kid with someone you trust, I wouldn’t waste it. But having said that, we took our DD on a Disney Cruise when she was 2-1/2 and it was positively magical! They really do a magnificent job of taking care of EVERYBODY, at all ages. They have a fully staffed nursery onboard for the kids under three so the parents can have a stress free fancy dinner out, go dancing or spend some time in the 21+ areas of the ship, but when you want to do some things as a family you have those options too. We never utilized the nursery for our kid when we went, but it was nice having that option. The cabins on the Disney ships are larger than typical cruise ship cabins specifically to accommodate families with kids. We loved being able to share that experience with her. It wasn’t cheap, but it was hands down the BEST vacation experience either DH and I had ever had before or since. He’s been all over Europe and to Hawaii twice and I’ve been to the South Pacific and Hawaii three times so it isn’t as if we had nothing else to compare it to. We’re going on another Disney Cruise next March, only this time our DD will be almost nine and will happily go to the kid’s club onboard part of the time. ![:grin:](//storage.proboards.com/5645536/images/TKS2q_7siLiFtq0xPQvx.jpg) She is really into art and anime drawing so I’m hoping there will be some stuff like that for her to explore. For us it’s the best of both worlds, being able to have some time to visit the grownup areas of the ship on our own and also still have some fun family things all together at other times. LOL, so I guess I’m really no help at all!
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