The Great Carpezio
Pearl Clutcher
Something profound goes here.
Posts: 2,970
Jun 25, 2014 21:50:33 GMT
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Post by The Great Carpezio on Dec 1, 2019 2:15:37 GMT
My kids (8 and 3) have both had iPads since they were 2. Been using them since they were old enough to interact with them with my help. I don't feel my kids are going to be too sheltered or miss out on anything by not having phones. They can message on their iPad, go on an social media sites they want (with my approval). Both iPads are pretty locked down with restrictions tho. I don’t know what your future will be, but if you had asked me at 8 if they needed a phone anytime soon, I’d probably said the same thing, but I had a lot of friends with older kids who warned me it was coming. My kids have had iPads for many years. There was absolutely no need until 9/10 and hockey, but it really just hit this year in sixth grade. Some extra dose of chaos and independence just hits at middle school. If you have a landline and your kids aren’t in activities or you are at all their activities all the time then it might be easier to hold off until high school, but with kids going in different directions with differing times and schedules changing and being home alone and....you get it.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Dec 1, 2019 3:04:31 GMT
My kids (8 and 3) have both had iPads since they were 2. Been using them since they were old enough to interact with them with my help. I don't feel my kids are going to be too sheltered or miss out on anything by not having phones. They can message on their iPad, go on an social media sites they want (with my approval). Both iPads are pretty locked down with restrictions tho. I don’t know what your future will be, but if you had asked me at 8 if they needed a phone anytime soon, I’d probably said the same thing, but I had a lot of friends with older kids who warned me it was coming. My kids have had iPads for many years. There was absolutely no need until 9/10 and hockey, but it really just hit this year in sixth grade. Some extra dose of chaos and independence just hits at middle school. If you have a landline and your kids aren’t in activities or you are at all their activities all the time then it might be easier to hold off until high school, but with kids going in different directions with differing times and schedules changing and being home alone and....you get it. Yes, exactly this. At some point it becomes a safety thing because kids are off doing things on their own where they may end up stuck with a changed schedule or a missed bus and no ride. It’s happened to my neighbor’s grandkid more than once. He now has a cell phone so if there’s another situation like that he can call his grandparents (or his sister because now she can drive) to come get him home.
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seaexplore
Prolific Pea
Posts: 8,778
Apr 25, 2015 23:57:30 GMT
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Post by seaexplore on Dec 1, 2019 3:06:29 GMT
My kids (8 and 3) have both had iPads since they were 2. Been using them since they were old enough to interact with them with my help. I don't feel my kids are going to be too sheltered or miss out on anything by not having phones. They can message on their iPad, go on an social media sites they want (with my approval). Both iPads are pretty locked down with restrictions tho. I don’t know what your future will be, but if you had asked me at 8 if they needed a phone anytime soon, I’d probably said the same thing, but I had a lot of friends with older kids who warned me it was coming. My kids have had iPads for many years. There was absolutely no need until 9/10 and hockey, but it really just hit this year in sixth grade. Some extra dose of chaos and independence just hits at middle school. If you have a landline and your kids aren’t in activities or you are at all their activities all the time then it might be easier to hold off until high school, but with kids going in different directions with differing times and schedules changing and being home alone and....you get it. No landline. My oldest goes to the school I teach at and will be there thru grade 8. Youngest will be at my school in a few years. DH is a SAHD so he’s with them if I’m not. The kids both do gymnastics and we either hang out at gym or drop and come back when they’re done. There is a phone at the gym. Play dates and hanging with friends is limited to weekends. We’ll see what life deals us but I’m planning on holding out until each kid goes to HS, preferably until they start driving and can pay their own phone and bill. But, I’m a mean mom so there’s that. 😂 Phone infractions will result in phone taken away, just like the iPad gets taken away at this age for poor behavior choices.
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Post by lucyg on Dec 1, 2019 3:54:38 GMT
My DGS (10.5) has had a phone since he was in kindergarten, but originally it was an old one with no service ... he just used it occasionally for games. More like an iPod.
He got a newer phone with service when he was 8 or 9, but he doesn’t take it to school with him except occasionally when he’s going somewhere else after school, and then it is turned off and buried in the bottom of his backpack till 3:00.
We have unusual circumstances because he lives with me during the week, goes to his dad’s on the weekends but talks to him during the week, and hears occasionally from his mom who is out-of-state.
I would not have gotten him a phone so young, but it wasn’t my call (ha ha ... pun). In any case, he doesn’t abuse it, and it has worked well for us for him to have one.
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artbabe
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,342
Jun 26, 2014 1:59:10 GMT
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Post by artbabe on Dec 1, 2019 14:13:28 GMT
My older nephews were 12 when they got theirs. The little one got his mom's old one (with no data plan) when he was 8. He mainly played games on it but he did have a texting app so I could message him. He is ten now and has an iphone (a couple models back) and a data plan. He walks home from school by himself and there are no other kids going his direction. I met him part way when he was walking home once and it was really freaky with just him walking a distance with no other kids in sight. So now he has a phone to call us to check in while he is walking home.
If you asked me this 2 years ago I would have said 10 was way too young but it makes the rest of us feel better that he has one, just for the safety reasons. I also like the ability to text him- his mom and brothers are sometimes not good at returning text messages but he will always return them right away. I wouldn't know what was going on if he didn't have one.
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Post by MZF on Dec 1, 2019 14:22:40 GMT
My kids are older--my oldest just turned 39!!! So I didn't even have a cell phone until my youngest was in middle school. I think he is the only one we even gave a cell phone to, and then it was when he got his license and it was one of our old flip phones.
I don't think a young child needs or should have a phone, though there might be times it would be beneficial (maybe a medical issue?). Probably the youngest I would get one of my GKs a phone would be when they get their license.
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Post by busy on Dec 1, 2019 14:46:28 GMT
We got DS an iPhone in 5th grade. We’d intended to wait for middle school (7th grade here), but we moved him to a different school in our district in 5th and we no longer knew all his friends’ parents, nor did his school friends live in walking distance from us. We decided it would be good for him to have his own phone to be in touch with his friends when not at school. Plus I travel a fair bit for work and sometimes his arrangements while I’m gone get complicated so having a phone is handy.
He’s been responsible with it, but physically and usage-wise.
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The Great Carpezio
Pearl Clutcher
Something profound goes here.
Posts: 2,970
Jun 25, 2014 21:50:33 GMT
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Post by The Great Carpezio on Dec 1, 2019 23:55:48 GMT
Looking at the answers, it seems a lot depends on how complicated schedules are. On one hand stay at home parents, limited activities, static schedules...I can see how a phone really wouldn’t feel like a need until high school. On the other hand, single parents or both working with different schedules, multiple activities at varying times and places it becomes almost necessary in our modern environment.
Thanks for sharing everyone. I think we all do what’s best for our families.
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Post by camanddanismom on Dec 2, 2019 2:18:38 GMT
Both my kids got phones for Christmas in 7th grade.
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scrapngranny
Pearl Clutcher
Only slightly senile
Posts: 4,813
Jun 25, 2014 23:21:30 GMT
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Post by scrapngranny on Dec 2, 2019 2:56:55 GMT
My granddaughter is 12 and in 6th grade. She wants a phone so badly, it has caused drama at home. She is the one girl in her grade that doesn’t have a phone, a lot of peer pressure. She has no need for a phone, she does not have any activities that her mom isn’t there or available to drive her. Her parents are completely against her having a phone at this time. They are concerned about social media and other predator issues and are not willing to give into classmates peer pressure. The thought of giving 12 year old a $800 device is a little off putting also. When they lose lunchboxes and jackets so frequently.
She has an iPod that she can text with from anyplace that has WiFi, so she can text with her friends, but she is not allowed to take it to school. I completely agree with her parents about waiting until high school to get a phone. After a long family talk, she came to understand and accept their decision. Middle school is really brutal if you are the one if you are not part of the everybody is doing it.
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Post by gmcwife1 on Dec 2, 2019 3:25:13 GMT
Our now 20 yr old got her phone when she was in the 5th grade. She went to Disney World with my sister and it was her first long distance, multiple day trip without us.
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StephDRebel
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,689
Location: Ohio
Jul 5, 2014 1:53:49 GMT
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Post by StephDRebel on Dec 2, 2019 13:29:43 GMT
15thBirthday gift.
They were some of the last in their class to have cell phones but I was always one of the more strict parents and they saw thwirbfrkemds making mistakes with a lot of things before they had free access so it worked for us.
W also lived in the middle of nowhere so service where there wasnt much service so it they only wanted them half as bad
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Post by PEAcan pie on Dec 2, 2019 13:57:20 GMT
Fifth grade and so far we are happy with our decision. A LOT changes in Middle School and they want to start making plans and communicating more regular.
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rickmer
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,137
Jul 1, 2014 20:20:18 GMT
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Post by rickmer on Dec 2, 2019 14:01:03 GMT
grade 7... that is senior public school for us and when they started to to school on their own (my kids were bus students for junior public) and no longer had supervised lunches.
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Post by LisaDV on Dec 2, 2019 16:56:07 GMT
I homeschooled, and we don't have a home phone. We had a flip phone that I would give to whichever kid would be separated from me for whatever reason. DS was 13/14. DD got my used one when I upgraded at the same time, she was around 12/13.
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Post by roxiemarie0524 on Dec 2, 2019 17:11:41 GMT
My Son was 14 when he got his first cell phone - IPhone 6 if I remember right.
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Post by mamatoa on Dec 12, 2019 18:18:35 GMT
Good Grief. Your twins are in MIDDLE SCHOOL?!
Carry on. I have nothing of value to add. Just an old lady now.
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Post by tentoes on Dec 12, 2019 20:36:13 GMT
I was 72. After my husband died last year, my dd bought me an iphone so my kids can track me and call me wherever I am. It gave my kids peace of mind to know where I was, and know they can get in touch with me at any time. I'm pretty computer literate, so changing to a cell phone hasn't been a big problem. I enjoy facetime with the grrandkids too. I like that my kids wanted to keep track of me. I thought it was funny.
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The Great Carpezio
Pearl Clutcher
Something profound goes here.
Posts: 2,970
Jun 25, 2014 21:50:33 GMT
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Post by The Great Carpezio on Dec 12, 2019 20:39:20 GMT
Good Grief. Your twins are in MIDDLE SCHOOL?! Carry on. I have nothing of value to add. Just an old lady now. Yeah, and I am an old lady mom of middle schoolers. ;p
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Post by sabrinae on Dec 12, 2019 21:11:21 GMT
For me, it has depended on maturity level of kid and my need for them to have one based on their schedules and my and their dad’s schedule. For my oldest it was 10 almost 11, the summer between 5th and 6th grade. She was responsible enough to be home alone and we don’t have a home line. She’s also young for the grade she is in as she has anAugust birthday. She was participating in travel sports and I had to rely on others for transportation. I wanted her to be able to contact me and to be able to check on her my youngest will probably be a little older just because of when her bday falls. I also am not as readily available as I would also like because of my job sh we both know if she’s calling me during work hours it better be important. For example she called me to come get her because she was in the middle of an asthma attack
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johnnysmom
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,684
Jun 25, 2014 21:16:33 GMT
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Post by johnnysmom on Dec 13, 2019 20:45:08 GMT
It is interesting to see the variety of answers, but sometime in middle school seems to be the majority. I think there are a lot more people who give cell phones to younger kids than this board indicates, but I also suppose people feel judged sometimes too, so those people aren’t sharing. While I think that's true I think it's also based on their environment. We're in a title 1 school district where many parents can't afford to give their kids phones early (if ever) so there's less peer pressure. Also, our middle school starts at 5th grade, so what I say is "middle school" is different than someone else who lives where middle school starts in 7th grade. So while middle school tends to be the average among the peas you're really talking anywhere from age 10 (young 5th grader) to age 15 (an old 8th grader).
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