Forgotten Birthday

I have a near Christmas birthday and so does one of my kids.

I often treat myself to a little gift and lunch someplace I want to go.

Some years I have organized something for myself but not always. I don’t mind calling up some people I know and saying, hey let’s go do something fun one evening, it’s my birthday present to me.

I make sure to make a fuss over my winter birthday child.

I did something that I needed to do for my mom. Her birthday was Dec 30 and I needed to go back to Japan by the 29th or so to make it in time for New Years. Not once did I make it for New Years. I stayed in Canada for her to celebrate her birthday. I celebrated mine in Japan and missed my sister’s every year and my dad’s but I never missed hers. I hope that made it special for her.

Mom and dh never forgot me but nobody else pays much attention. Actually it never bothered me. I don't like attention.
I enjoy getting cards but really don't care about anything else.
I do buy my own gifts. Its awesome. I always get the perfect gift and no one has to worry about it.
I'm getting a heated throw this year.

I understand, I truly do. Both of my kids have December birthdays (in fact my son's is today and my daughter's is 7 days before Christmas). Never once has my side of the family remembered either kid's birthday on the actual day. Usually there is an extra Christmas gift thrown in and I am just supposed to know that was for their birthday too. I used to get pretty bent out of shape about this, but I am trying more each year to "let it go".

Still it hurts. Especially since my entire family was just here last week and we celebrated my nephew's birthday with gifts and not one person even mentioned that my son's birthday was this week. But God forbid we miss one of their birthdays!

My DH feels your pain with his Dec 23rd birthday. One year I combined his birthday and Christmas present and he let me know that was not cool!

Mine is a week into December, so I get it. My mom was always good about it when I was growing up, although I was an only child so that helped! What I find as an adult is friends are crappy about it, although I'm not super into by birthday and the attention, so that helps. My BFF is very into her birthday (March) and always wants to get a group to go out, complains her DH doesn't do enough and she'll drop hints that I can take her to lunch or that she wants to go on a trip for her birthday. I now have to blow her off mostly for my own peace of mind, since it's been 25+ years of this and she doesn't reciprocate for my Dec birthday (and if she does, it's a random gift - never wanting to go out since she's busy that time of year).

I have another group of friends that I always do a card, small gift and a get-together for each of their bdays (and have for about 5 years for one of them and 10+ for the other two). One of them takes me to dinner for mine, one mails a card and the other nothing. The friend that takes me to dinner called it a Christmas get-together this year (although close to my bday) and invited the other two. They are too busy so are asking if we can get together between Christmas and New Year's. It's fine, but it just got all weird again.

The best part about my Dec bday, is DS's bday is the day after mine and one of DD's the day after that. So, now that they are growing up and I'm not focusing so much on them, DH and I go stay at a hotel and do dinner, drinks and shopping (at the Mall of America). He totally foots the bill and that's my gift and I love it! I say if you can find something to do for yourself - spa day, a night away, shopping for yourself - the best thing I did was find something special for me and we do the same thing every year now. Honestly, I'd be tickled blocking out a day for myself at home to scrapbook with a bottle of wine and some chocolates, too. Hope you can find something that makes you happy!

My daughter is born December 23. We have always taken great care to make her birthday a big deal. In fact, I’m sure we overcompensate 🤪I hope she doesn’t feel shortchanged. Her best friend is born December 24, so they often do a joint celebration with all their friends.

Last year, when she turned 16, we took her to NYC for her birthday. On the 23rd we had a special dinner at Daniel Boulud.

It’s funny, when I was pregnant, my due date was December 26. I really didn’t want a late December baby, so initially I hoped she would be late, and born in January. As my due date got closer and I became more uncomfortable, and then downright miserable, I didn’t care when she was born, I just wanted her OUT!!

My friend has a Jan 1st BD.  I always make sure that I give her a gift in birthday paper and make sure that her children celebrate their mom's birthday properly.  

Another friend has her birthday so close to Mother's Day.  Her DuH has a hard time buying her a gift and I tell him that all of the sales are on for Mother's Day and this is a good time to have a birthday.  She hates the combined birthday & Mother's Day gifts.  At least the kids usually make something at school for Mother's Day, so there is something, but the prices for eating out really jump in price for that weekend for brunch.

My Birthday falls in between Thanksgiving and Christmas. I am not a big birthday celebrator in general but I do take myself out to do a few nice things i enjoy and want to do alone.

When pregnant with DS he was due 24/25 December which I thought would be awful but fortunately he was induced and was born on 2 December and that is bad enough. 

When he was younger (now 41) we never had any signs of Christmas in the house until after his birthday and even now I concentrate on the birthday and then get into Christmas. 

Dec 21 here so I can relate. I have no words of wis, just a happy birthday hug!

Happy birthday to you!

I once worked with a friend whose birthday is Christmas Eve. I think that's the worst, because everybody is busy rushing around preparing. There is no good day of the week for it to fall on. She used to choose a nice Friday at the end of June and announce a half-birthday. We'd have an office lunch picnic in the local park, with presents and cakes and all the fun, and we would add a 1/2 to her birthday cards. It worked for her.

My Mum's birthday is on Dec 11th. Her sister is on Dec 31st, their father and mother (my grandparents) were on Jan 1st and a couple of weeks later. My father's birthday was also mid-January. All got lost in Christmas, but as they never had much money for presents anyway, they simply didn't do anything for any of them, so my brother and I were both brought up with not much emphasis on our May birthdays. I remember as children we had the choice between a birthday treat (family outing) and a party. I only remember a party for my 6th birthday, and my idea of a birthday treat was a walk in the woods, or to take dad's blind friend to a concert. I don't think my upbringing was very typical though.

it's your birthday.  do whatever you want.  it is no less important because some people forgot about it.  enjoy your day regardless of who remembers.

i had a friend who got all bent out of shape because her best friend didn't remember her wedding anniversary.  like wtf?  how is that her job to remember and celebrate a day that has nothing to do with her?  

I'm sorry.

DS's birthday is next week and we just went over everyone's schedules last night to figure out when we could go for dinner so the family celebration won't be until 3 days later after his birthday. Growing up, he often delayed his party until January because the logistics started getting insane and between Christmas/Hanukkah obligations he would have trouble getting his two besties to come. Until he was about 10 or so we didn't start decorating for Christmas until after his birthday.

Honestly, I don't care/worry about extended family and friends remembering my birthday. I did laugh last year when DD texted DH & DS from South Africa reminding them to wish my a happy birthday, but didn't think twice about it when I talked to my dad that day and he didn't say a thing.