paigepea
Drama Llama
Enter your message here...
Posts: 5,609
Location: BC, Canada
Jun 26, 2014 4:28:55 GMT
|
Post by paigepea on Dec 23, 2019 21:31:29 GMT
Sorry. I lol’ed.
My expectations with guests is that if I’m flexible they can be flexible too. I understand that guests want to attend church and if it’s dinner then eating before 5:30 is early. The guests who want to leave by 7 should have declined the invite or decided to be more flexible with their kids.
I once had guests come. I made dinner but when they arrived they asked me to make pasta for their dd who wouldn’t eat my meal. Then they were unhappy that I only had whole wheat. And omg it was penne and i didn’t have an extra shape. And although I made appetizers and then soup - so two courses before main course - can we bring out main because other dd is hungry. If you want to dine and celebrate with others you need to be flexible.
|
|
|
Post by papersilly on Dec 23, 2019 21:31:56 GMT
i think it's the host's prerogative to set the terms of the gathering. we have these kinds of "requests" too but i've learned that if i'm not the one hosting, i really can't expect any accommodations. the host/hostess is stressed enough. now if i am hosting, my house my rules.
|
|
|
Post by bc2ca on Dec 23, 2019 21:38:04 GMT
Just seeing if I'm a miserable host or these requests seem demanding.
1. Couple bringing 2 month old baby. Want a sanitized room no one else can go in and people to keep a 5-10 radius. 30 people will be here. 2. Other couple wants to leave at 7 on on the dot due to kids schedule but we can't eat until 530 because.... 3. Other couples going to church at 4 so we can't eat until 5:30 1. hahahahahahahahahahahahaha please pick up some crime scene tape and cordon off the 5-10' radius and put a basket of clean room coveralls and masks for the parents. 2. If the kids are young enough to have a schedule, they are going to be beside themselves about Santa. Staying up later than normal is probably a good thing for them. If the parents need to leave, wish them a Merry Christmas as they head out the door. 3. Seems reasonable. I can't serve earlier because tomorrow is a work day for some guests. This is even more reasonable than 3 above. Could be a good reason to push dinner to 6.
|
|
|
Post by Scrapper100 on Dec 23, 2019 23:08:54 GMT
We have a cousin who was very premature and has some lung issues as a result, they feel well loved when people try to make space for them to attend family events as they feel left out a lot. If mom and dad can go to the family Christmas party it means a lot to them, it’s okay to try to make an effort. A sterile room with a 10ft buffer seems a little extreme but it’s a gesture of love to try to do what's possible. I understand the parents feeling left out, but you need to weigh the risk vs. the reward. 30 people is a lot. I assume some are children and not likely to be as careful as adults with hygiene. I am not saying the parents should be shunned, but there are likely smaller gatherings they could attend or they could have a small event at their own house. This time of year the chances of 30 people not carrying some illness is very unlikely no matter how careful you are. You might have been exposed and not even know you are contagious until a few days later. Yes it sucks and no one is shunning them but to try and keep that many that far away will be impossible. That and mom and dad will be exposed even if baby isn’t and then baby will later. Mom or dad will touch something in the house that someone else has. Avoiding illness even when really careful and washing your hands constantly still is far from perfect. Good luck with your party and I hope it goes well.
|
|
|
Post by mikklynn on Dec 23, 2019 23:57:45 GMT
Hell no.
I invite people and tell them what time we are eating. I also tell DH's family what to bring or they'd expect me to do it all.
I'm hosting my family Saturday. It's potluck. The vegans, non-dairy, gluten-free, and diabetics can bring what they like. There is no way I can accommodate all those dietary issues.
|
|
|
Post by papercrafteradvocate on Dec 24, 2019 1:26:29 GMT
I’d likely hand them baby’s parents a Fallon jug of hand sanitizer and tell them to go for it.
I did the dinner time party thing last year with trying to juggle every one else’s timetable, it resulted in such a chaotic mess that stressed me out, hurt my feelings that people could be rude, and the food was ready on time but because of other people’s time differences, some was warm some got dry, some was cold....
So this year I set a date, a time and added the “if you cannot be here, we will miss you!”
|
|
|
Post by katlady on Dec 24, 2019 1:42:38 GMT
The first request is so ridiculous!
As for the dinner times, I invite people, tell them what time dinner is, and if they are late or have to leave early, then that is up to them. I don’t change for them.
|
|
|
Post by crazy4scraps on Dec 24, 2019 1:48:42 GMT
If there were issues with my child that had those kinds of requirements, I simply wouldn’t go. It wouldn’t be worth the risk to me because as others have said, at this time of year there are all kinds of sick people milling around who don’t realize how sick they are until a few days later after everyone around them have been exposed. We have neighbors who usually host a holiday party at their house and there have been several years one of their own kids ended up visibly ill by the end of the party (flushed, really red ears, runny nose, etc.) It happens, so if you really don’t want your kid getting sick or exposed to all those germs you stay home. Yeah it sucks but that’s life when you have a really little baby in your life over the holidays.
I’m understanding with people’s schedules especially if they have to work that day. The 5:30 dinner time is fine and I would tell people that the sit down time is firm. So if they want they can come early, enjoy some appetizers and nibbles, eat right away when it’s served and dash right after if needed for the people who can’t stay and if the churchgoers end up coming a little late they can fill a plate and microwave it before they eat if needed, and then linger over dessert. It’s all good, people can make it work.
|
|
pancakes
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,993
Feb 4, 2015 6:49:53 GMT
|
Post by pancakes on Dec 24, 2019 2:01:47 GMT
I’m about to be a first time mom and although I care about germs, I certainly would not expect someone else to cater to MY problems. Especially when it’s a party and not just 4-6 people.
Similarly, if I had a food allergy but wanted to go, I would bring my own food or not partake. I would never expect someone to go out of their way to accommodate me and my problems.
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
May 17, 2024 21:11:05 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 24, 2019 2:13:57 GMT
You are apparently way more accommodating than I am ever. I would say no.
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
May 17, 2024 21:11:05 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 24, 2019 2:15:52 GMT
Sorry. I lol’ed. My expectations with guests is that if I’m flexible they can be flexible too. I understand that guests want to attend church and if it’s dinner then eating before 5:30 is early. The guests who want to leave by 7 should have declined the invite or decided to be more flexible with their kids. I once had guests come. I made dinner but when they arrived they asked me to make pasta for their dd who wouldn’t eat my meal. Then they were unhappy that I only had whole wheat. And omg it was penne and i didn’t have an extra shape. And although I made appetizers and then soup - so two courses before main course - can we bring out main because other dd is hungry. If you want to dine and celebrate with others you need to be flexible. 😱 No. words. Someone needs a lesson. Snowflake would not be getting a different meal unless there was an allergy or medical condition and then I would expect to know well in advance.
|
|
milocat
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,437
Location: 55 degrees north in Alberta, Canada
Mar 18, 2015 4:10:31 GMT
|
Post by milocat on Dec 24, 2019 3:20:01 GMT
If you have central heat or air running then won't then germs circulate into the sterilized baby room? Are they leaving the baby in the room the whole time? If not it will be exposed to your dirty house! 10 foot radius, that would be half the hallway in our house and no one would get the the bathroom!
|
|
StephDRebel
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,666
Location: Ohio
Jul 5, 2014 1:53:49 GMT
|
Post by StephDRebel on Dec 24, 2019 5:24:21 GMT
I'm a bit jaded but I'm watching a friends baby with RSV and she went from perfectly healthy to might not make it through the night. Its awful.
I wouldnt ask you to sanitize but there is 0 chance my new baby would be at a holiday party.
The times I dont mind if they are just letting you know and not expecting you to change things for them.
|
|
pilcas
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,920
Aug 14, 2015 21:47:17 GMT
|
Post by pilcas on Dec 25, 2019 20:12:58 GMT
I probably would not bring a newborn to a party. I know things can happen and it is better to play it safe. I would not presume to tell the host to sanitize their home and be responsible for keeping a safe radius.
|
|
|
Post by MissBianca on Dec 25, 2019 20:22:40 GMT
So how did dinner go?
Today my dad is whining because we are having dinner and not lunch. Sorry Charlie but all my kids work nights, they aren’t up before 10 or 11 and I’m not rushing presents so we can eat at 2.
|
|
|
Post by bearmom on Dec 26, 2019 1:24:19 GMT
I probably would not bring a newborn to a party. I know things can happen and it is better to play it safe. I would not presume to tell the host to sanitize their home and be responsible for keeping a safe radius. This. It is cold and flu season, so I would not bring my 2 month old to a party with 30 people. I would not expect the hostess to accommodate my issues.
|
|
hannahruth
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,616
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Aug 29, 2014 18:57:20 GMT
|
Post by hannahruth on Dec 26, 2019 5:58:32 GMT
Sorry but this is ridiculous and if they can't fit in with you, well sorry - we will see you another time.
If they are that worried about baby then stay home. The other children's schedule is on them certainly not on you.
I think I would want them not to come unfortunately, they are really making this about them and nothing else.
|
|
momto4kiddos
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,151
Jun 26, 2014 11:45:15 GMT
|
Post by momto4kiddos on Dec 26, 2019 12:29:02 GMT
Clean space in a bedroom where baby could nap, sure. Sanitized room, not so much.
My invites are generally dinner is at this time kind of invitations. I'm usually working around my kids work schedule so I just tell people what time to expect dinner so they're aware of what my plans are.
|
|
|
Post by jemmls4 on Dec 28, 2019 1:10:39 GMT
That's no reasonable. Do not bend to their demands. "Dinner will be at (your chosen time), Guest. I hope you can join us." " Unfortunately, i cannot guarantee a sterile environment for your infant. I look forward to seeing you & the baby when he/she is able to mingle. " This is perfect. That parents are completely looney tunes.
|
|
anaterra
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,844
Location: Texas
Jun 29, 2014 3:04:02 GMT
|
Post by anaterra on Dec 28, 2019 10:04:10 GMT
Sooo how did it go???
Baby n parents??? The family that had to leave at 7???
Any other drama??
|
|
|
Post by tripletmom on Dec 30, 2019 6:24:35 GMT
What happened? I hope it went well!
|
|
anaterra
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,844
Location: Texas
Jun 29, 2014 3:04:02 GMT
|
Post by anaterra on Dec 30, 2019 17:16:41 GMT
|
|
|
Post by teach4u on Dec 30, 2019 19:10:41 GMT
So the baby didn't come, family cancelled an hour or two before dinner. We ate and had a good time. Those that had to leave left/
|
|
DEX
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,355
Aug 9, 2014 23:13:22 GMT
|
Post by DEX on Dec 30, 2019 21:59:48 GMT
Well, that was somewhat of a let down. I was hoping for hair pulling at least.
|
|
|
Post by workingclassdog on Dec 30, 2019 22:40:53 GMT
This would be my answer.. Dinner is at 5:30 (or whatever time you set) and cannot be changed. Sorry. Couple with baby.. sorry. Can't help you out. I am hosting a dinner, I am not a hospital. They are FREAKING rude. (UNLESS their baby has some kind of life/death illness) which I think anyone would help out in that situation.
Oh sorry, didn't realize it was over and done.. Dang I was looking forward to some hair pulling or something!
|
|
|
Post by elaine on Dec 30, 2019 22:42:18 GMT
So the baby didn't come, family cancelled an hour or two before dinner. We ate and had a good time. Those that had to leave left/ I’m glad that you had a good time!
|
|
anaterra
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,844
Location: Texas
Jun 29, 2014 3:04:02 GMT
|
Post by anaterra on Dec 31, 2019 0:51:21 GMT
Im glad it was a nice evening!!
|
|