Moving: How to negotiate DH to get rid of stuff

We got a storage shed to put all the stuff we didn’t use on daily basis to make the house look less congested and the closet and cabinets look really spacious.

Spring is the best time to list a house. The trick is to get the old and new houses to close at the same time.

I wouldn’t worry just yet. You still have time! You haven’t listed the house or found the new house just yet. Clear out the space around them and see what happens. My DH would use them daily just to prove me wrong. And no, I’m not kidding!

When we moved to Belgium, we got rid of a lot. At first it was just me cleaning out cupboards and closets. DH was adamant that he didn’t have much and that it was my stuff taking up space. It was when I started selling things on Craigslist that DH got interested. We didn’t make much—about $1,500–but he started purging closets and boxes he hadn’t unpacked from the last move. He donated as well as sold things.

Our biggest problem was that emptyish closets in 5,000 square feet still is a lot of stuff when you put it in 1,800 square feet. It fits, but we left stuff in storage, too.

If he still decides to keep the equipment, I would encourage him to get rid of the current set and update to equipment that is newer and more pleasing to look at. And that it goes into his space in the new house. Sell it before you move and make a deal that you won’t buy until you are in the new house. He may never get around to buying the new set...

We moved in October.  It was time as we are in our 80’s and needed master on the main.  But, DH had a very difficult time letting go of his “toys” which took up all the extra storage space in our garage.  I decided to let it go.  The rest of the house was clean and ready to “show”, and the market was good for selling.  And the house sold in a week to the 2nd couple that looked at it—cluttered garage didn’t matter.  We still have items in our much smaller garage that he just can’t let go, but I have come to understand his need to keep things that will never be used here.  The move was stressful for him, but he is beginning to feel comfortable here.

My husband loves his "stuff". It helped with our move last summer when we talked through what we wanted in the look/feel of our new place. He quickly realized that a lot of this stuff would not fit into what we. both wanted so out it went. He has been so careful about what we purchase for our new space now to make sure it is uncluttered and comfortable. He loves it! So maybe have him talk through what he wants the house to feel like - style - design -spaces....

I think this is the trouble with my husband.  Mine acts like he went through the depression.  I swear he has some mental hang up.  Clutter and messy areas don't seem to bother him.  His eyes don't "see" it like mine do.

Mine is fixated on how much he spent on something. So 'that piece of whatever cost $300 we can't get rid of it'. Also his stuff "doesn't take up that much space." The wood bar in his closet is literally going to snap in half someday because he won't get rid of clothes he never wears...

I want to be supportive, but I can't help but think we ALL have things our spouses don't value as much as we do - for whatever reason. And I actually know my justifications can seem unreasonable. It might really not be about the workout bench - using the words stupid, damn, bullshit, and POS just feels like a different kind of response than is warranted. I wouldn't want to have to justify the bookshelves full of books that line our basement (and the books in my daughter's bedroom, our bedroom, and the living room) to my husband if he didn't see the value in them or the fact that I'm not actually reading any of them and they are not very aesthetic while they take up space. They're mine and I want them. We both get to live in our house with things we want.

Honestly, I don't think it will sell. Gym equipment, unless it is something like a newer NordicTrac or Peleton, is just not an item that is in great demand!  I see that kind of stuff listed on the give away groups on Facebook as well as see lots of it sitting at the curbside for trash pick up.

Gym memberships are so cheap anymore, people tend to do their work outs there.

I would see if any local community centers that have exercise programs for kids or a school that is in need of gym equipment.


I have a hubby who refuses to let go of crap too (stuffed animals from his high school years, LOL!!! I did not have to trash them, I told them he could keep them, I did not care, but they were not coming into the house ever. so he put them in the garage in bags....the mice got them!!!! )

I am a bit anal about planning spaces as to where everything goes (a product of being a bit OCD everywhere except in my crafty space, LOL) so I showed my hubby the plan for all furniture pieces as we were getting ready to move 5+ years ago. His gym contraption crap and bench did not make it to the new place because he would have had to give up garage space for it and he made the decision to scrap it at the junkyard! We bought a membership to the local JCC which is within biking distance from our house, complete with all the amenities.

The only exception in our home is that he can keep whatever the heck he wants in his own personal office and the garage.  I don't clean in either of these spaces (he does it all to the extent that he wants) --I will vaccum if he is in there when I am doing the hallway leading to his office.   And in return, He does not complain about my crafty space!  

so, I would say, there is no room in the basement with all your model items, if you want to keep it then it goes in the garage and stays there.

If that does not work, maybe you could purchase a gym membership for him (or your family) since he says he wants to work out!

Moving is one of the most stressful events in a lifetime, and if keeping some stuff makes the move easier for him, I wouldn't push too hard. If he takes responsibility for packing and moving it, I would let it go.