Ex and the Motorcycle

Be happy for DS. Show interest in the bike. Can you invest in a rider training/safety course for him? Are riders required to wear safety gear? If so, take him shopping if you can afford to.

How about encouraging him to ride off road? Moto x or trial rides might be more his style.

Don’t say anything to the X. He might be looking for a reaction - don’t give him the satisfaction 😂

Here you have to take a motorcycle course to get your license to drive it. And helmets are mandatory as well.

I'd still be nervous as hell though.

I’ll validate you. He is an adult and you can do nothing, but that would scare the pants off of me.

I totally understand where you are coming from. My nephew loved motorcycles, wore his helmet and leather clothes, all the safety stuff. Three years ago a large SVU did not see him due to sun in the driver's eyes and my nephew was killed. He was only in his late 20's.

I'd be pissed, but I wouldn't say anything. You can't control your ex and your son is an adult

My brother is an Emergency Specialist. In most ERs where he has worked they call motorcycle riders "donor of the week". My youngest son is working on getting his motorcycle license. I am petrified, even though he wants to ride a scooter rather than a full bike. Not much I can do except make sure he wears safety gear and obeys all the road rules.

I would be very upset if my ex had purchased a motorcycle for our son too.  I hate them.  And it isn't just the skill of the bike rider that I fear, but the drivers in cars that sometimes just don't see them and cause accidents.  I don't think it would be bad to have a discussion about motorcycle safety and to even offer to pay for a motorcycle safety course.  I would also make sure he had the best helmet available.  And I would be hoping that he outgrew the bike quickly.  If I could afford it, I would be considering buying a little pickup for him instead.

This is just a weird thing that happened after my nephew purchased a motorcycle for himself.  As much as I hate them, it wasn't my place to say anything and my sister didn't seem to mind.  He had owned it for about a month.  I lived about 100 miles from my sister's house so I didn't see them that often. 

I was grocery shopping in Costco with my ex fiance when suddenly, out of absolutely nowhere, I got an overpowering need to warn my nephew to be very careful with the motorcycle.  I have no idea why that popped into my head at that moment.  I said something to my fiance and he kind of laughed at me.  I had gotten very strong thoughts like this throughout my life and they had always been accurate, especially when they were about my dad.  I tried to keep shopping but I felt this dread feeling so strongly that I had to just stop and call my sister immediately. 

My nephew still lived with my sister.  Mom and Dad were staying there for a visit and Mom answered the phone.  I told her my feeling that was getting more and more urgent.  She said that my nephew had just left on the motorcycle but she would have either my sister, who was out running errands, or my nephew call me when he returned.  She tried to reassure me that my nephew was a careful kid, which I knew was true, but that didn't help me with this anxiety.

We continued to shop, but I was extremely uneasy.  About 20 minutes later, my cell phone rang.  It was my mom.  She said my sister was returning home from her errands and came upon an accident in the roadway.  It was my nephew on his motorcycle.  They lived in a fairly remote area and the fastest way to get him help was for her to put him in her car and drive him back down the mountain to the hospital.  She called Mom to let her know when she was almost back into town and finally receiving cell service.  

My nephew was quite hurt with multiple broken bones, punctured lung, and a concussion.  The helmet he had on was cracked, so I can imagine what the impact would have been on his head without one.  My sister had left the motorcycle on the side of the road where she found my nephew. She called his best friend to tell him about the accident and he offered to go collect it while my nephew was in surgery.  I guess their intention was to repair it back to good-as-new condition while my nephew healed. 

When he was finally released from the hospital and they were driving back home, my sister said he never once asked about the bike, not even when they were driving through the area where the accident occurred.  When his best friend came to the house to visit him, he told him that his motorcycle was being repaired and almost finished.  My nephew told them that he didn't want to even see it again and they ended up selling it after it was finished.