edie3
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,507 
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Post by edie3 on Oct 4, 2021 15:37:57 GMT
She is almost 17. She can't hear, and she has cataracts so can't see. She has trouble walking, so we do not let her go up and down stairs. She has fallen down the stairs too many times, so we carry her up or down. She tries to jump up on the couch but misses it a lot and falls, it is a low couch, so not too worried she will get hurt. She has dementia, and most nights she just whines for no real reason. She has accidents 1 and 2 in the house. She sleeps a lot, too.
But she still eats good and knows what time she gets her nightly treat. She was such a ball of energy when we first got her, and now she is just a shell of her former self. I guess I am wondering about her quality of life. She still gets joy from her treats, but not much else.
Any words of advice? I don't feel like it is "time", but I hate the life she has now.
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lesley
Drama Llama
My best friend Turriff, desperately missed.
Posts: 7,197
Location: Scotland, Scotland, Scotland
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Post by lesley on Oct 4, 2021 15:41:16 GMT
It sounds to me like you do know what to do, but aren’t ready to accept it yet. I’m sorry, I know how hard it is.  |
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Post by disneypal on Oct 4, 2021 15:43:02 GMT
I'm sorry, it is so hard when our pets have aging health issues. Personally, I feel that if she eats well and enjoys her treats, then she is okay. Just give her extra love and continue to do as you do now - carry her up and down the stairs (install a baby gate if needed to ensure she doesn't have a tumble). They do sleep a lot when they are older.
If she gets to where she doesn't eat, then consult with the vet. I know it is so hard ((HUGS))
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Post by tentoes on Oct 4, 2021 15:51:35 GMT
My decision with one of my dogs was much easier. She had cancer, and was in pain. The last morning she couldn't jump down from the bed, and it hurt her for me to pick her up to help her. I knew it was time. It didn't make it any easier. Praying for you. It's so hard.
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edie3
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,507
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Post by edie3 on Oct 4, 2021 16:01:38 GMT
Thanks for the love and support. After I posted this, she let me hold and pet her. She doesn't really like to be petted any more, I think if we go up to her when she is asleep, it scares her because she can't see or hear us. But she let me love on her a long time, for her.
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Oct 4, 2021 16:02:26 GMT
not sure...
The life she used to have can't possibly be the life she has now, at this age... but if she's eating and seems happy, does that seem like it's enough for her? One of our dogs got to the point where pretty much all she did was hang out and sleep... she did seem to enjoy our company, and enjoyed the fresh air on the patio. She finally got to the point where she wouldn't eat or drink ANYTHING, and that was when we knew it was time. So I think if your dog seems to be enjoying herself, even with as little activity as she has, then it may not be time yet.
eta: I'm glad she let you give her some pets and love... our oldest dog right now has hearing and vision loss, and it's tough for me when I need to wake him up-- I don't want to scare the crap out of him unnecessarily. I usually touch him gently on the head / neck, and it startles him... but I'd rather do that than have him wake up while I'm trying to step over him in the hallway.
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Post by mnmloveli on Oct 4, 2021 16:09:39 GMT
Praying for you and your furry girl. It’s an awful thing to watch as they get old. Even 17 years is not enough. Only you can make the decision on quality of life. We always think as long as our beloved dogs could eat, drink and go out to the bathroom, that would be good. We would never want them to be embarrassed if they couldn’t get up and outside. It’s a horrible position to be in, but I think she will tell you when it’s time. Toughest decision but greatest sign of love to help her when it’s time.
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Post by Patter on Oct 4, 2021 16:12:21 GMT
Our 15 year old dog can no longer hear, has cataracts but can still see a bit, has trouble jumping on the couch, eats fine, and still seems happy. I have not even considered anything different for him yet. He does need to go out a LOT now though for some reason. His bladder just does not much anymore.
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Post by sunnyd on Oct 4, 2021 16:19:34 GMT
I'm so sorry! The whining at night might be a sign that it is time. I know it's so so hard.  Sending love to you and your sweet girl. What breed is she? |
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Post by canadianlinda on Oct 4, 2021 16:26:38 GMT
So sorry you are going through this, I know how hard it is. Years ago I read that your pet will let you know when they are ready to go. I didn’t understand it then but when our Dachshund was 14 and in poor health he just looked at me with such a ‘different pained’ look that I knew it was his time.
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Post by Basket1lady on Oct 4, 2021 16:28:19 GMT
I’m so sorry. It’s a terrible decision for us to have to make.
We’ve had 3 dogs. The first died in surgery so the decision was made for us. Our second was 13 1/2. She had lived for years with chronic illness but was happy, ate and pottied well. We helped her up and down the stairs, but she was always happy. But the time came when she wasn’t eating and wasn’t happy to see us come home. She hadn’t wagged her tail in days and was refusing even wet dog food. She had been sick, but always rallied. But that time, we knew she just wasn’t coming back from it.
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mystydog
Junior Member
Posts: 94
Location: Ramsgate, UK
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Post by mystydog on Oct 4, 2021 16:42:07 GMT
Word for word, you could have been describing my dog Domino, he was 17 years old.
In a space of two weeks, his legs just got worse, so he would fall down just walking across the room.
We knew then that it was time to say goodbye. It was the hardest thing I've ever done.
My son and I were there holding him and even though we were devestated, there was a relief that he was no longer suffering.
xx
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edie3
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,507
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Post by edie3 on Oct 4, 2021 17:23:47 GMT
DH and I discussed it, and as long as she gets enjoyment from her treats and is eating and drinking, she is okay. Not great, not good, but okay.
She is a rat terrier, and she was kinda stolen from the pound. A friend's daughter was in school to be a vet tech, and they would get animals from the local pound to "practice" on. Then the animals were sent back to the pound to be put to sleep. The students saw how special she was, and I guess did not send her back to the pound. She is the light of our lives.
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scrapngranny
Pearl Clutcher
Only slightly senile
Posts: 4,769
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Post by scrapngranny on Oct 4, 2021 18:09:45 GMT
Quality of life was my deciding point. Is she living or existing?
You are the only one who can make that decision. There isn’t a wrong choice at this point.
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Post by annaintx on Oct 4, 2021 18:30:10 GMT
We lost our dog very suddenly a few weeks ago. It was devastating. I am sorry you are dealing with this, it's so hard.
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Deleted
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Jun 18, 2024 10:26:57 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Oct 4, 2021 18:37:27 GMT
edie3 I'm so sorry. I went through that with my Shih Tzu and we did put him down at age 14. He could have lasted so much longer, but he was in pain and it was no real life for him. It's such a tough call! They're not gonna tell us, "Hey, I'm really sick and in pain." They try to cover their pain for us. Cats too!! Cats are even harder to diagnose and it seems that vets do NOT just put them down even if they're in that condition. We have a 17 year old shell of a cat. She's crying more and more (even right after she eats, so she's not hungry). She's not herself anymore BUT she's eating, drinking and using the potty, so vets aren't inclined to immediately put her down. It's such a tough call.
I wish you the best. I'd say, as her fur-mommy, you would know if this isn't her normal life anymore. I try to put my feelings aside and see what's best for the pet. I had to put down my beloved 9 year old cherished kitty who was really like a baby to DH and me. He was born on our wedding day. He got cancer along the line (no clue!) and then just couldn't get off the floor. The night before that, he was climbing up on our furniture and acting like his baby-self. I couldn't see him living in severe pain for 4 more weeks, so I opted to put him down. It's just SUCH a hard call.
We're all here if you need us; this whole, huge fur-loving Pea family. Huge hugs to you!! xoxo
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Post by christine58 on Oct 4, 2021 18:40:39 GMT
She is almost 17. She can't hear, and she has cataracts so can't see. She has trouble walking, so we do not let her go up and down stairs. She has fallen down the stairs too many times, so we carry her up or down. She tries to jump up on the couch but misses it a lot and falls, it is a low couch, so not too worried she will get hurt. She has dementia, and most nights she just whines for no real reason. She has accidents 1 and 2 in the house. She sleeps a lot, too. But she still eats good and knows what time she gets her nightly treat. She was such a ball of energy when we first got her, and now she is just a shell of her former self. I guess I am wondering about her quality of life. She still gets joy from her treats, but not much else. Any words of advice? I don't feel like it is "time", but I hate the life she has now. Honestly it sounds like it’s time. Sometimes we hold on longer for ourselves |
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scorpeao
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,521
Location: NorCal USA
Jun 25, 2014 21:04:54 GMT
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Post by scorpeao on Oct 4, 2021 18:51:03 GMT
When I had to put my dog down the vet told me to think of my dog's five favorite things, and once she lost/couldn't do three of them, it was time. She said it's a way to avoid unnecessary suffering and a crisis situation. I'm sorry you have to face this...one of the most awful things I've ever had to do.
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seaexplore
Prolific Pea
Posts: 8,521
Apr 25, 2015 23:57:30 GMT
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Post by seaexplore on Oct 4, 2021 18:52:10 GMT
not sure... The life she used to have can't possibly be the life she has now, at this age... but if she's eating and seems happy, does that seem like it's enough for her? One of our dogs got to the point where pretty much all she did was hang out and sleep... she did seem to enjoy our company, and enjoyed the fresh air on the patio. She finally got to the point where she wouldn't eat or drink ANYTHING, and that was when we knew it was time. So I think if your dog seems to be enjoying herself, even with as little activity as she has, then it may not be time yet. eta: I'm glad she let you give her some pets and love... our oldest dog right now has hearing and vision loss, and it's tough for me when I need to wake him up-- I don't want to scare the crap out of him unnecessarily. I usually touch him gently on the head / neck, and it startles him... but I'd rather do that than have him wake up while I'm trying to step over him in the hallway. I saw a video the other day of a guy who has a blind and deaf (from birth) pup. He goes up to her and blows on her so she knows he's coming and it doesn't startle her. |
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edie3
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,507
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Post by edie3 on Oct 4, 2021 19:27:22 GMT
thank you all for all the love and support. You all have given me good advice. Our other dog was sick, so there was no question on when.
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Post by angel97701 on Oct 4, 2021 20:23:57 GMT
When I had to put my dog down the vet told me to think of my dog's five favorite things, and once she lost/couldn't do three of them, it was time. She said it's a way to avoid unnecessary suffering and a crisis situation. I'm sorry you have to face this...one of the most awful things I've ever had to do. This is great advice!
OP, may your fur kiddo let you clearly know when it is time!
We have a 13 year old GSD, who can mostly hear and see, but had a hard time standing up on our slick LVP. On carpet she does better. She had a raging bladder infection last spring and we almost lost her due to that and the vet prescribed overdose of her pain meds. We got her through that and she is still going. Her person is our DS15, and she still has a job to do! Our male is 11 and can't hear, now he is much more affectionate than when he could hear. But he is easily startled when he's sleeping. Our 9 year old female ate 1/2 pillow, and we spent $$$$ at the Emergency Vet clinic, we were still traveling and got home a day after she came home. Good news was when they had her open they found a mass on her spleen, and with the biopsy it turns out to be a cancer that is usually treated by removing the spleen, which was already done. Somehow we got to where we have old dogs! Where did the years go?
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Post by papersilly on Oct 4, 2021 20:36:20 GMT
my one dog is almost like your dog. she is turning 14 and is a medium size dog. her hearing is failing and her hips are bad. she doesn't like to eat breakfast but eats dinner most of the time. i am preparing special homemade beef or chicken and vegetable stews to get her to eat. no more regular dog alone. she can still bark at the gate and she certainly know when it's treat time but she is very restless at night and wanders aimlessly in the evening. it's the doggie dementia that is most worrisome. we are keeping a close eye on her but we know THAT conversation will be coming sooner than later.
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Post by mom on Oct 4, 2021 20:47:08 GMT
Im sorry. We had to let my girl Annie go just over a week ago. I was in your shoes (should we, shouldn't we) until she got real sick. Then it was obvious. In a span of about 4 hours DH and I knew that to keep her any longer was not what we wanted. She was ready to go. I think you'll know when its time.
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Post by annaintx on Oct 4, 2021 20:55:38 GMT
Hugs to all of us who are dealing with this. It's SO HARD!!
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tanya2
Pearl Clutcher
Refupea #1604
Posts: 4,427
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Post by tanya2 on Oct 4, 2021 21:24:06 GMT
Aww it's such a hard decision to make isn't it? My girl is 14, has one really bad cataract & the start of another, is losing most of her hearing, bladder control isn't what it used to be, and she has chronic pancreatitis. All of which sounds like a lot - but really she seems pretty happy most of the time. So we're just taking it month by month seeing how she's doing. But honestly I'm hoping she'll just pass in her sleep when it's time so I don't have to make the decision.
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Deleted
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Jun 18, 2024 10:26:57 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Oct 4, 2021 21:34:36 GMT
It is so hard to go through. So very very hard. Sending hugs.
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Oct 4, 2021 21:35:36 GMT
My best friend had to make that decision recently for her 19 year old cat. It's gut-wrenching to be sure. Sending you a hug.
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FurryP
Drama Llama
To pea or not to pea...
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Jun 26, 2014 19:58:26 GMT
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Post by FurryP on Oct 4, 2021 23:02:36 GMT
Thanks for the love and support. After I posted this, she let me hold and pet her. She doesn't really like to be petted any more, I think if we go up to her when she is asleep, it scares her because she can't see or hear us. But she let me love on her a long time, for her. Maybe she was trying to help you decide? All I know is that I regret not letting my first dog go sooner. I have learned since then. I am grateful for all the love and happiness we shared and wish it would never end, but is is not about me, it is about them. So sorry you are dealing with this.  |
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edie3
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,507
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Post by edie3 on Oct 4, 2021 23:35:35 GMT
papersilly that sounds exactly like her. It is rare when she eats in the morning and right now is wandering aimlessly. Hugs to all who have been through this, it is heartbreaking.
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christinec68
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,154
Location: New York, NY
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Post by christinec68 on Oct 5, 2021 0:33:18 GMT
When I had to put my dog down the vet told me to think of my dog's five favorite things, and once she lost/couldn't do three of them, it was time. She said it's a way to avoid unnecessary suffering and a crisis situation. I'm sorry you have to face this...one of the most awful things I've ever had to do. This is what my vet said also. I’m so sorry you have to deal with this…it’s so so hard. (((Hugs))! |
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Sending love to you and your sweet girl. What breed is she?
