Just T
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Post by Just T on Jul 14, 2022 20:18:05 GMT
the first day of the rest of my life. Also called, the day my divorce papers were officially filed. I received notification this morning that my divorce papers were filed today. I feel/felt so many things it's hard to describe. My anxiety was sky high, so I took the morning off, with the blessing from my boss, and went to one of my favorite walking places for a long walk. It was brutally hot, and I was half sick by the time I finished the loop around the lake, but I had also calmed down. I guess I sweated it all out. LOL As I hit one of my favorite parts of this path, it curves into the woods, and I had this thought of that curve representing my life right now...I don't know what is ahead, and I know there will be many curves in the path, but I am ready to take them all on. My STBX is out of town until Monday. My lawyer said I can tell him I filed, and she will give him 5 days to come pick the papers up, or I can just have him served. I want to tell him so I can see the look on his face. I told him a few weeks ago that I had hired an attorney and was going to be filing for divorce, but he hasn't mentioned it since. He probably thinks I am bluffing. Anyway, the ball is rolling. I feel good and scared and excited and terrified and so much more. I asked a friend who is a stay at home mom to go with me this morning but she couldn't. Instead, she invited me over tonight to have wine and swim. Here are some pics from my walk:    Thank you all so much for all of the support and kindness you have given me through this. |
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Post by auntiepeas on Jul 14, 2022 20:25:03 GMT
That’s huge news, congratulations!
Well done for prioritising taking care of yourself, what a lovely place to walk, and I hope your get together with your friend is fun.
Best of luck with delivering your news, and for lots of blue skies ahead! 💚
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Post by revirdsuba99 on Jul 14, 2022 20:25:17 GMT
Thinking the wine and a swim tonight will be wonderful!!
You had time to sort your thoughts out this morning.
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Post by sabrinae on Jul 14, 2022 20:26:34 GMT
It’s the first step to the rest of your life. The next several months will be rough as you go through the process. But, hang in ther and keep moving forward— life will be so much better once you get through it.
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Post by tentoes on Jul 14, 2022 20:27:25 GMT
((HUGS)) I'm glad you are taking care of yourself.
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Sarah*H
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Post by Sarah*H on Jul 14, 2022 20:35:00 GMT
I am so proud of you for taking this step!
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Rhondito
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Post by Rhondito on Jul 14, 2022 20:51:09 GMT
I'M PROUD OF YOU!!!
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Post by leannec on Jul 14, 2022 20:51:57 GMT
The beginning is hard but then you will see that you are better off! I have a really good relationship with my ex now but it wasn't always that way ... You may never have that and that's OK ... everyone is different ... Focus on yourself and not on him  |
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Post by Lexica on Jul 14, 2022 21:07:30 GMT
Wow, you have a beautiful area to walk in! No wonder you felt better afterward.
When I told my DH that I had filed, he didn’t believe that I did it. He said he was hoping we could work through everything and get back together. This while he is living with the girl he cheated with. I say girl because he was early 30s and she was 19. He then began dragging his feet and forcing continuances on every court date. He would say he had a business meeting out of town or that he was sick. He dragged everything out so long just to keep me married to him.
I finally got a bifurcation where they legally ended the marriage and we still had to do child support and custody. I guess courts don’t like to do that. They want to force you to agree to custody and division of assets so you are not free until you do. But mine had been going on for almost 5 years! The judge said I deserved to be free. I also asked to have my name back to my maiden name. He put that in the papers too. Boy did that anger my ex.
I know the unknown can feel scary, but it is also very exciting. You now have the opportunity to have your life exactly how you want it. You are getting a do-over! You can make your own decisions now. You don’t have to visit the in-laws unless you liked them and want to continue a relationship. Remember, you were single before you met this guy and you are simply single again. It wasn’t scary and awful before, was it?
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Post by mikklynn on Jul 14, 2022 21:07:53 GMT
I am so proud of you for taking the time off, as well as moving forward. You deserve so much more from life!
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Post by papersilly on Jul 14, 2022 21:10:33 GMT
the ball is rolling and may it keep on rolling to a great new life!
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teddyw
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Post by teddyw on Jul 14, 2022 21:13:37 GMT
Good for you for thinking of yourself. Enjoy the swimming & wine.
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Post by freecharlie on Jul 14, 2022 21:17:22 GMT
Yay!!! I know filing was when I started to turn the corner. It was me taking my life back.
I wish you all the best and hope the process is smooth and as painless as possible.
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Post by Basket1lady on Jul 14, 2022 22:12:31 GMT
What a big milestone. Good for you for taking the time this morning to process and acknowledge it. I wish you a smooth road ahead.
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lisaknits
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Post by lisaknits on Jul 14, 2022 22:18:35 GMT
Way to go! We are all so proud of you for taking that big step.
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Post by Skellinton on Jul 14, 2022 22:25:16 GMT
I know it sounds weird to say, but congratulations! Anne of Green Gables has a quote about the bend in the road I always loved, you post made me think about it.
"When I left Queen's my future seemed to stretch out before me like a straight road. I thought I could see along it for many a milestone. Now there is a bend in it. I don't know what lies around the bend, but I'm going to believe that the best does."
I wholeheartedly believe the best lies ahead for you.
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Post by quinlove on Jul 14, 2022 22:41:51 GMT
You are a total rock star ! You’ve got this - and you’ve got all of us too.
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Post by mellyw on Jul 14, 2022 22:55:37 GMT
Another who is so proud! Pretty sure I recognize where you went walking and it is beautiful and peaceful, I’m so glad you took the time for yourself
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Just T
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Post by Just T on Jul 14, 2022 23:23:22 GMT
Remember, you were single before you met this guy and you are simply single again. It wasn’t scary and awful before, was it? I have never lived on my own, believe it or not. I went from my parents to college to marriage. "When I left Queen's my future seemed to stretch out before me like a straight road. I thought I could see along it for many a milestone. Now there is a bend in it. I don't know what lies around the bend, but I'm going to believe that the best does." I love that quote!!! Thank you!! Pretty sure I recognize where you went walking and it is beautiful and peaceful, I’m so glad you took the time for yourself I walked at Creve Coeur Lake. My favorite place to walk and reflect. It was just too hot today. LOL That long part around the lake before you get to the woodsy part was brutal today. LOL Thank you all sooooo so much! You all rock!! |
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Post by mom on Jul 14, 2022 23:38:15 GMT
Yay for you!!! I am so proud of you that you are taking this next step in your life! It wont be easy but it will be so worth it!
Now, when he comes back to town --- will you be safe? You two still live together, yes? Do you have a plan in place as to where you can go if things get bad? Are all your important documents safe? Photos safe?
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Post by mollycoddle on Jul 15, 2022 0:37:19 GMT
Good for you! The rest of your life awaits. |
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Post by AussieMeg on Jul 15, 2022 0:57:31 GMT
I'm proud of you for taking the first step towards making a better life for yourself! Your photos are gorgeous, I'd love to go for a walk with you...... if I wasn't about 14,000km away!  |
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Post by Bridget in MD on Jul 15, 2022 1:04:26 GMT
Glad you are taking care of yourself! hugs!
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Post by jenjie on Jul 15, 2022 1:10:43 GMT
I wish you the best as you step into your future. ❤️
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Post by callmenutz on Jul 15, 2022 4:06:03 GMT
That is a beautiful park and I’m glad it brought you some peace! Good luck going forward.
I have a picture of my grandparents there from around 1900.
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kate
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Post by kate on Jul 15, 2022 4:34:25 GMT
Best wishes to you as you move through the next chapter in your life!  |
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Post by malibou on Jul 15, 2022 5:27:17 GMT
I can feel the stress of all that has happened pouring off of you as I read your post. I am so happy for you. Wishing you all the best as you head down your new life path.
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Post by rainangel on Jul 15, 2022 11:41:09 GMT
I remember the day I took off my wedding ring.
It was a good day, followed by more good days. I expect you will say the same about this day in a few years.
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casii
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Post by casii on Jul 15, 2022 11:43:24 GMT
Well done. Each step is a step towards making yourself a priority and freedom from the tyranny of hurt and uncertainty.
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joelise
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Post by joelise on Jul 15, 2022 12:44:16 GMT
Well done! Walk towards your new future.
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