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Post by epeanymous on Mar 7, 2023 14:22:53 GMT
There is a whole novel by Calvin Trillin, Tepper Isn't Going Out, about a guy who likes to sit in his parked car!
I don't mind the doxxing efforts when someone seems genuinely dangerous.
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SweetieBsMom
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,618
Jun 25, 2014 19:55:12 GMT
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Post by SweetieBsMom on Mar 7, 2023 14:47:19 GMT
Actions have consequences 🤷🏼♀️ There is where I land on it. I can't get over people nowadays that think it's ok to treat someone like that. IT'S NOT. UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. And if you behave like that, I hope everyone can see it: your family, your friends, your employer Actions DO have consequences. We teach that to our kids how is it some adults have forgotten that lesson. My company has a code of conduct, I'd be fired in a hot minute if that were me on the video. It's happening way too much, and it's happening everywhere. And as someone said, I feel like this bad behavior coincides with Trump becoming president. Regardless of what's instigating the behavior there needs to be a stop to it and if the only way it stops is because your afraid someone will record your bad behavior and the world will see it. So be it. Some of the videos I have seen absolutely horrify me. Hell it sickens me.
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Post by lisacharlotte on Mar 7, 2023 15:15:34 GMT
I think this behavior coincides with both cameras being on every phone, people trying to become IG famous and have their video go “viral” and people not being in a community where people know their neighbors and shaming might happen.
I would love to see reactions from people who actually know this woman. I bet this isn’t surprising.
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iowgirl
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,145
Jun 25, 2014 22:52:46 GMT
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Post by iowgirl on Mar 7, 2023 15:19:25 GMT
I think social media has caused people to totally lose their minds. I agree. I understand the want and need to "out" someone for their behavior, but the way people, en masse, go after someone is scary. I have seen it go horribly wrong on TikTok in the past when the person who did the wrong was mistaken for someone else with the same name. It's pretty hard to take that back after the cats out of the bag.
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pantsonfire
Pearl Clutcher
Take a step back, evaluate what is important, and enjoy your life with those who you love.
Posts: 4,762
Jun 19, 2022 16:48:04 GMT
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Post by pantsonfire on Mar 7, 2023 15:28:23 GMT
I think social media has caused people to totally lose their minds. I agree. I understand the want and need to "out" someone for their behavior, but the way people, en masse, go after someone is scary. I have seen it go horribly wrong on TikTok in the past when the person who did the wrong was mistaken for someone else with the same name. It's pretty hard to take that back after the cats out of the bag. I have had to step back from community support in one area because a few persons feel the need to basically stalk persons to see their every move and then go bat poop crazy when they do something and go on the attack. Social media and doxxing have created some very unhealthy behaviors in people. I do not agree with the right wing nut jobs words/statements or actions (attending rallies to push anti fill in the blank agena) but the opposite side doesn't look great either when going on the attack, rallying the troops, and attacking the person on their social media accounts.
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Post by iamkristinl16 on Mar 7, 2023 15:50:29 GMT
Actions have consequences 🤷🏼♀️ There is where I land on it. I can't get over people nowadays that think it's ok to treat someone like that. IT'S NOT. UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. And if you behave like that, I hope everyone can see it: your family, your friends, your employer Actions DO have consequences. We teach that to our kids how is it some adults have forgotten that lesson. My company has a code of conduct, I'd be fired in a hot minute if that were me on the video. It's happening way too much, and it's happening everywhere. And as someone said, I feel like this bad behavior coincides with Trump becoming president. Regardless of what's instigating the behavior there needs to be a stop to it and if the only way it stops is because your afraid someone will record your bad behavior and the world will see it. So be it. Some of the videos I have seen absolutely horrify me. Hell it sickens me. I agree that actions do have consequences. I’m just not sure that the consequences these days “fit the crime.” Sure, that lady acted like a total asshole that day. I’ve never done anything like that, but I’m sure I’ve had moments that I don’t want to be plastered all over social media, either. Should she be fired and/or have everyone she knows and encounters judge her based on that interaction? I’m not sure. I worry that what we see as “consequences” now are more drastic than they need to be. And that is carried over into gun violence as well. People think that any slight to them or any “crime” justifies being shot or shooting someone.
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Post by peace on Mar 7, 2023 15:55:17 GMT
I just don't like all the anger and spitefulness in our country these days. I still say it boiled up during Trumps 2016 run for President, and boiled over all through his time in office. It may be my imagination, but I think it starting change back a little. Hopefully the next administration will get us back to civility. this administration or the next one? Just wondering.
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Post by peace on Mar 7, 2023 15:59:11 GMT
I don't feel bad if someone like that woman in the parking spot video gets blowback. She went out of her way to make someone else miserable because she is an entitled twat. She did this to herself. Do I think there are situations it goes too far? Absolutely. This ain't one. Like the lady in the pizza joint that called them out for having Spanish speaking television on and wanted a refund. She needed to be exposed. You don't just get ugly once for a minute. That's a pattern of behavior and perhaps the public shaming will slow down the bullies.
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pantsonfire
Pearl Clutcher
Take a step back, evaluate what is important, and enjoy your life with those who you love.
Posts: 4,762
Jun 19, 2022 16:48:04 GMT
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Post by pantsonfire on Mar 7, 2023 16:16:25 GMT
I don't feel bad if someone like that woman in the parking spot video gets blowback. She went out of her way to make someone else miserable because she is an entitled twat. She did this to herself. Do I think there are situations it goes too far? Absolutely. This ain't one. Like the lady in the pizza joint that called them out for having Spanish speaking television on and wanted a refund. She needed to be exposed. You don't just get ugly once for a minute. That's a pattern of behavior and perhaps the public shaming will slow down the bullies. Bullies hopefully. But it does seem to add fuel to the fire of hateful groups/persons and only makes them more hateful and nasty. When you ignore their stupidity, they simmer down. When you call them out and add traffic to their social media pages, they act out more because clicks and views bring in income.
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Post by Neisey on Mar 7, 2023 17:09:58 GMT
license plate number and the woman was from Canada. I’m not sure if the incident occurred there or just that the woman was from there. Lol I thought it looked like the plates in my province but couldn’t get a good look.
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Post by don on Mar 7, 2023 19:30:42 GMT
I just don't like all the anger and spitefulness in our country these days. I still say it boiled up during Trumps 2016 run for President, and boiled over all through his time in office. It may be my imagination, but I think it starting change back a little. Hopefully the next administration will get us back to civility. this administration or the next one? Just wondering. The next one. I hope Biden does not run. I just hope the next President is "Presidential". Is well spoken, well mannered, is a career politician, and has read JFK's book The Ugly American.
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Post by paulao on Mar 7, 2023 20:39:50 GMT
I would have to the woman to go fuck herself and rolled up the car window. There’s no point in filming her or doxxing her because there are no consequences. Bitch will still think she’s right. Sit in the car until she has to in the building.
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Post by Merge on Mar 7, 2023 21:44:52 GMT
I don't feel bad if someone like that woman in the parking spot video gets blowback. She went out of her way to make someone else miserable because she is an entitled twat. She did this to herself. Do I think there are situations it goes too far? Absolutely. This ain't one. Like the lady in the pizza joint that called them out for having Spanish speaking television on and wanted a refund. She needed to be exposed. You don't just get ugly once for a minute. That's a pattern of behavior and perhaps the public shaming will slow down the bullies. Bullies hopefully. But it does seem to add fuel to the fire of hateful groups/persons and only makes them more hateful and nasty. When you ignore their stupidity, they simmer down. When you call them out and add traffic to their social media pages, they act out more because clicks and views bring in income. The problem with ignoring them is that on many of the issues they bring up, wanting to curtail human rights or start a civil war or whatever, silence is complicity.
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Post by auntkelly on Mar 7, 2023 23:11:44 GMT
I do not believe doxxing is ever appropriate. People are too crazy these days- doxxing could get someone assaulted or murdered. I agree 100%. Doxxing is the modern version of vigilante justice.
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Post by Laurie on Mar 8, 2023 1:21:38 GMT
I don’t think one interaction should lead to getting her fired. You don’t know what the lady is going through. Maybe she is always an asshole. But maybe she is going through something really difficult and isn’t her normal self. If she was going to a counseling appointment maybe she has a mental health situation going on.
Sometimes we just need to extend a person grace because we don’t know what is going on in their life.
For example, a little over a year ago my grandma was dying from Covid and my parents were in quarantine. We have a family owned business so I was running it while my dad was out. In all of this chaos an employee was retiring. This particular morning I received the call at work that my grandma had passed. I was devastated but had to take care of this retirement party. I drove an hour each way to pick up the cake and cupcakes. When I got there they did not have the order nor did they have enough to put something together. I am a non confrontational person to a fault. I was irritated but remained polite. I had to start driving around this town buying what cupcakes I could. They weren’t matching and I was running out of time to get back before the party. On the third stop my irritation level was high and when I went to checkout the registers were down. I wasn’t rude to the workers but my irritation definitely shown through. Normally I would have been sympathetic and reassuring to the workers but with all that was going on with my emotions I definitely had an irritated bitch face going on. Now it wasn’t behavior like this lady but I could easily see how if someone wasn’t a natural people pleaser like myself that they may have had an outburst.
We just don’t know what a person is going through so I choose to always be kind. If nothing else I also don’t know if the person is a whack-a-doodle that will pull a gun or knife on me. Lol
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Post by prettyprettypaper on Mar 8, 2023 1:37:49 GMT
The woman was definitely rude and disrespectful, but in reality what should be the consequence for that? Should she really be fired, publicly shamed, and so on? What are your thoughts? When I first learned of the word "doxing/doxxing," I immediately thought of the Peas and some of the drama we've had on the board over the years! In this case, as rude and irrational as she was, I don't think the lady deserved to be fired over it, but I could see where it may depend on the type of job she had. Perhaps her workplace may deem her behavior as not becoming of a person in the position she holds. For example, maybe she's the CEO of a charitable organization. She had no problems publicly shaming the woman in the car, so I see no problem with her being publicly shamed herself.
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Post by Laurie on Mar 8, 2023 1:47:19 GMT
The woman was definitely rude and disrespectful, but in reality what should be the consequence for that? Should she really be fired, publicly shamed, and so on? What are your thoughts? When I first learned of the word "doxing/doxxing," I immediately thought of the Peas and some of the drama we've had on the board over the years! In this case, as rude and irrational as she was, I don't think the lady deserved to be fired over it, but I could see where it may depend on the type of job she had. Perhaps her workplace may deem her behavior as not becoming of a person in the position she holds. For example, maybe she's the CEO of a charitable organization. She had no problems publicly shaming the woman in the car, so I see no problem with her being publicly shamed herself. In fairness it doesn’t appear there were others around so the woman wasn’t getting publicly shamed. It looks like to me it was just between the two of them until the one lady posted it for every one to see. FTR I agree the lady was out of the line. However, the lady sitting in the car reacting by making it go viral is leaving a less than innocent impression on me.
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Post by prettyprettypaper on Mar 8, 2023 2:02:14 GMT
When I first learned of the word "doxing/doxxing," I immediately thought of the Peas and some of the drama we've had on the board over the years! In this case, as rude and irrational as she was, I don't think the lady deserved to be fired over it, but I could see where it may depend on the type of job she had. Perhaps her workplace may deem her behavior as not becoming of a person in the position she holds. For example, maybe she's the CEO of a charitable organization. She had no problems publicly shaming the woman in the car, so I see no problem with her being publicly shamed herself. I’m fairness it doesn’t appear there were others around so the woman wasn’t getting publicly shamed. It looks like to me it was just between the two of them until the one lady posted it for every one to see. FTR I agree the lady was out of the line. However, the lady sitting in the car reacted by making it go viral is leaving a less than innocent impression on me. I saw the video on TT but don't recall the background. I just remember that it was a parking lot - which is a public space. Therefore, at any given time, other people could have been walking in the area and been exposed to the situation. Yelling at someone in a parking lot (again, public space) indicates that one really does not care about 1) being seen and heard and 2) embarrassing the person being addressed. Now, if the lady had at least been speaking calmly both in manner and volume, I would be more likely to believe that she was trying to keep the conversation between the two of them only. But, that is not the case.
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pinklady
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,563
Nov 14, 2016 23:47:03 GMT
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Post by pinklady on Mar 8, 2023 2:21:33 GMT
The second she started with the fat shaming, all bets are off. Had she just been bitching about the parking spot it would have been nothing really but the once she started with the fat bullshit, fuck her. I hope her company did see it and she gets fired.
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Post by chaosisapony on Mar 8, 2023 2:55:31 GMT
Wow, that’s so rude. My fat ass would have stayed in that parking space for the rest of the night. Same. Quickest way to get me to camp out is to act like that lady did. That was ridiculous.
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tracylynn
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,872
Jun 26, 2014 22:49:09 GMT
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Post by tracylynn on Mar 8, 2023 19:06:30 GMT
There is where I land on it. I can't get over people nowadays that think it's ok to treat someone like that. IT'S NOT. UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. And if you behave like that, I hope everyone can see it: your family, your friends, your employer Actions DO have consequences. We teach that to our kids how is it some adults have forgotten that lesson. My company has a code of conduct, I'd be fired in a hot minute if that were me on the video. It's happening way too much, and it's happening everywhere. And as someone said, I feel like this bad behavior coincides with Trump becoming president. Regardless of what's instigating the behavior there needs to be a stop to it and if the only way it stops is because your afraid someone will record your bad behavior and the world will see it. So be it. Some of the videos I have seen absolutely horrify me. Hell it sickens me. I agree that actions do have consequences. I’m just not sure that the consequences these days “fit the crime.” Sure, that lady acted like a total asshole that day. I’ve never done anything like that, but I’m sure I’ve had moments that I don’t want to be plastered all over social media, either. Should she be fired and/or have everyone she knows and encounters judge her based on that interaction? I’m not sure. I worry that what we see as “consequences” now are more drastic than they need to be. And that is carried over into gun violence as well. People think that any slight to them or any “crime” justifies being shot or shooting someone. But here's the thing - and I know you didn't mention losing their job - but if my employer had evidence that I was out there publicly being a racist asshole, or calling a woman fat and lazy because she was sitting in her car, or whatever else - they would absolutely not want me to involved in their company. Actions have consequences. You don't have a right to a job. An employer gets to determine if they want you associated with their name/brand.
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Post by hop2 on Mar 8, 2023 19:23:47 GMT
For example, the other day the post was of a woman going off on another woman because she was sitting in her car in a full parking lot. The woman was definitely rude and disrespectful, but in reality what should be the consequence for that? Should she really be fired, publicly shamed, and so on? What are your thoughts? Consequence for what? Sitting in the car in a parking lot? - nothing Yelling at someone for no reason? 🤷♀️ also nothing. Unless it progressed to harassment and we have legal consequences for harassment. Also if some sort of hate speech was used, but there are also legal consequences for that as well. People are rude all the time. And, it’s not always the loud person who was the rudest in the interaction. If we didn’t see the entire interaction then we can’t really judge. You can quietly tell someone to F off and add a few expletives & be just as rude as someone who is yelling.
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Post by iamkristinl16 on Mar 8, 2023 21:54:34 GMT
I agree that actions do have consequences. I’m just not sure that the consequences these days “fit the crime.” Sure, that lady acted like a total asshole that day. I’ve never done anything like that, but I’m sure I’ve had moments that I don’t want to be plastered all over social media, either. Should she be fired and/or have everyone she knows and encounters judge her based on that interaction? I’m not sure. I worry that what we see as “consequences” now are more drastic than they need to be. And that is carried over into gun violence as well. People think that any slight to them or any “crime” justifies being shot or shooting someone. But here's the thing - and I know you didn't mention losing their job - but if my employer had evidence that I was out there publicly being a racist asshole, or calling a woman fat and lazy because she was sitting in her car, or whatever else - they would absolutely not want me to involved in their company. Actions have consequences. You don't have a right to a job. An employer gets to determine if they want you associated with their name/brand. I understand and agree with that, and I think that is where I am torn. I think part of my hesitation in agreeing with this type of response is that nothing goes away online. That person could lose their job now, but also be prevented from getting another job in the foreseeable future due to this situation being blown up. Does she deserve that? Maybe, maybe not. What about the person who was said to have sexually abused someone else? How do people proceed with that information?
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Post by papersilly on Mar 8, 2023 23:02:30 GMT
there's a bearded man on tiktok who is famous for finding people who need to be outed/found. the karens, the racists, etc. he has a large following so it doesn't take long to find people. i don't think he searches out just anyone. sometimes these people have already made the news and he's just helping in the search.
i think some people need to be identified. i don't know if people should get them fired but if their bad behavior started it all, public "justice" will finish it.
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tracylynn
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,872
Jun 26, 2014 22:49:09 GMT
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Post by tracylynn on Mar 9, 2023 0:21:47 GMT
But here's the thing - and I know you didn't mention losing their job - but if my employer had evidence that I was out there publicly being a racist asshole, or calling a woman fat and lazy because she was sitting in her car, or whatever else - they would absolutely not want me to involved in their company. Actions have consequences. You don't have a right to a job. An employer gets to determine if they want you associated with their name/brand. I understand and agree with that, and I think that is where I am torn. I think part of my hesitation in agreeing with this type of response is that nothing goes away online. That person could lose their job now, but also be prevented from getting another job in the foreseeable future due to this situation being blown up. Does she deserve that? Maybe, maybe not. What about the person who was said to have sexually abused someone else? How do people proceed with that information? I guess I'm to the point in life that I just don't give a fuck anymore. Literally. Trump made it OK to be a racist, sexist, xenophobic, homophobic, transphobic asshole in public. These feelings were always there, they just had enough smarts, or shame, to keep it within their own circle and not make themselves known. It's exhausting, and I'm tired of it. If you're going to make yourself known in this day where everyone carries a camera on them and has access to things like Tik Tok and such - then guess what? You fucked around, then you found out. I have no sympathy. Yes, the internet is forever. And THAT is what these people should be remembering before showing their ass. And if they can't remember that, then honestly, you get what you deserve. I also call bullshit on most apologies. They're just sorry they got caught and called out.
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Post by Bridget in MD on Mar 9, 2023 0:34:43 GMT
there's a bearded man on tiktok who is famous for finding people who need to be outed/found. the karens, the racists, etc. he has a large following so it doesn't take long to find people. i don't think he searches out just anyone. sometimes these people have already made the news and he's just helping in the search. i think some people need to be identified. i don't know if people should get them fired but if their bad behavior started it all, public "justice" will finish it. That's TizzyENT
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Post by lisacharlotte on Mar 9, 2023 13:44:02 GMT
In addition to tracylynn above, this woman was well aware she was being filmed. At that point, she has the option to shut up and find another parking spot. She doesn’t get worried until the other lady gets out of her car to get a picture of her license plate. She knew she was acting beyond the pale. Fuck around and find out is where she went all on her own.
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Post by smasonnc on Mar 9, 2023 14:20:21 GMT
I agree that actions do have consequences. I’m just not sure that the consequences these days “fit the crime.” Right. Who gets to judge? People look to the internet for revenge, not exactly the most well-adjusted group of arbiters. She went out of her way to make someone else miserable because she is an entitled twat. I can never understand the anger behind these rants. The woman is unhinged. I would have been worried about engaging someone that crazy. Maybe she needed a counseling appointment more than the lady in the parking space. I would have to the woman to go fuck herself and rolled up the car window. A very appropriate way to handle it. I would have told her to have her meltdown somewhere else. Someone called me the other day to complain about something stupid and I told her she was going to have to rant at someone else today because I've got too much to deal with right now. Trump made it OK to be a racist, sexist, xenophobic, homophobic, transphobic asshole in public. These feelings were always there, they just had enough smarts, or shame, to keep it within their own circle and not make themselves known. It's exhausting, and I'm tired of it. It's like the "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" when you find out people you know are complete raving assholes but they've kept it quiet until now. license plate number and the woman was from Canada. I’m not sure if the incident occurred there or just that the woman was from there. It had to be Canada. Nobody got shot. Canadians, this woman is seriously damaging your reputation as the world's nicest people.
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Post by nine on Mar 9, 2023 16:57:58 GMT
I think it’s a way to shame people into not acting like assholes.
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Post by myshelly on Mar 9, 2023 17:04:34 GMT
When I first learned of the word "doxing/doxxing," I immediately thought of the Peas and some of the drama we've had on the board over the years! In this case, as rude and irrational as she was, I don't think the lady deserved to be fired over it, but I could see where it may depend on the type of job she had. Perhaps her workplace may deem her behavior as not becoming of a person in the position she holds. For example, maybe she's the CEO of a charitable organization. She had no problems publicly shaming the woman in the car, so I see no problem with her being publicly shamed herself. In fairness it doesn’t appear there were others around so the woman wasn’t getting publicly shamed. It looks like to me it was just between the two of them until the one lady posted it for every one to see. FTR I agree the lady was out of the line. However, the lady sitting in the car reacting by making it go viral is leaving a less than innocent impression on me. This sounds very victim blamey to me. Yes, the first paddy was wrong, but the Second Lady shouldn’t tell on her?
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