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Post by grammadee on Mar 14, 2023 22:08:10 GMT
Been exhausted since the time change. Dragged myself out of bed this morning and stepped outside to the sight of our dog's muzzle full of porcupine quills.
Just feeling blah...
Tell me something funny. Puh-leeeeeeze...
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Post by AussieMeg on Mar 14, 2023 22:11:22 GMT
Dragged myself out of bed this morning and stepped outside to the sight of our dog's muzzle full of porcupine quills. I mean, that's not in the slightest bit funny, but all I can think about is being able to use a cute little porcupine die cut and coming up with a punny title on the scrapbook page you're going to make. (Assuming you got photos of your poor dog's suffering!) |
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quiltz
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,696
Location: CANADA
Jun 29, 2014 16:13:28 GMT
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Post by quiltz on Mar 14, 2023 22:52:07 GMT
Next year, start with the time change earlier. My friend "moves her day up" by 20 minutes on Thursday night, again by 20 minutes on Friday and lastly on Saturday.
At about 3 pm on Saturday afternoon, move the clock ahead one hour and continue on with your day.
You shouldn't feel the time change.
If you have pets, move their feeding time up a bit for a few days in advance of spring ahead and do the reverse for fall-back.
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Post by cecilia on Mar 14, 2023 23:23:31 GMT
Q:
What do you call a boat full of potatoes and penises?
A:
A dictatorship
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Post by grammadee on Mar 14, 2023 23:30:48 GMT
Thanks cecilia! Now THAT made me laugh! |
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Mystie
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,299 
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Post by Mystie on Mar 14, 2023 23:47:23 GMT
So sorry about your pup and the general post DST-exhaustion.
About an hour ago my indoor-outdoor cat came downstairs from his nap and wanted to go outside. Sometimes when he goes out, especially in colder weather, I give him a treat so he'll get his furry little butt out the door more quickly.
So I was standing with the door half-open, reaching into the pouch to pull out a treat, and he's at my feet waiting to run out and get his treat, and I dropped the bag and spilled maybe 25 treats on the floor.
The cat is confused as to where the shower of treats came from, but he starts munching them down as fast as he can, while I'm trying to pick them up as fast as I can, while laughing at how intent he was on crunching them down. It was like a game of Hungry Hungry Hippos.
I think he only ended up getting four or five treats, so it was fine. He had to go to the vet for his yearly check-up and shots and blood work yesterday, so he deserved extra treats anyway. It was just hilarious watching him gobbling them down with this confused look on his face. 😄
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scrappyesq
Pearl Clutcher
You have always been a part of the heist. You're only mad now because you don't like your cut.
Posts: 4,029
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Post by scrappyesq on Mar 14, 2023 23:59:50 GMT
Thanks cecilia ! Now THAT made me laugh!
ME TOO!!!!!
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scrappyesq
Pearl Clutcher
You have always been a part of the heist. You're only mad now because you don't like your cut.
Posts: 4,029
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Post by scrappyesq on Mar 15, 2023 0:12:44 GMT
Been exhausted since the time change. Dragged myself out of bed this morning and stepped outside to the sight of our dog's muzzle full of porcupine quills.
Just feeling blah...
Tell me something funny. Puh-leeeeeeze...
The only funny story I have is from the other day trying to find canned seltzer. Around this time of year with Purim and Passover it's a hot commodity. I couldn't find any anywhere near me, but I figured I would find some in the Bronx. And I did. At the smallest supermarket ever. Each aisle is only the width of one cart so when someone is in the aisle you want they have to move down the aisle so you can grab what you're looking for. I spotted my seltzer in one aisle and I waited for the lady shopping to move down a little so I could grab my seltzer and back out. There were only 4 cases left, so decided to get all of them. The second box I picked up broke and all of the cans went flying. I looked behind me and there was someone coming. I looked in front of me and the lady was glaring at me because she now couldn't move. NO ONE TRIED TO RETRIEVE A SINGLE CAN. They were everywhere. So I politely took my time with my work heels and my cane and picked them up. The best part? None of them broke so I still had a full twelve cans from that case.
(ironically EVERY year I say to myself to stock up on seltzer before the Jewish holidays and EVERY year I end up doing the same scramble, not always successfully).
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Post by don on Mar 15, 2023 1:22:19 GMT
For Seniors
You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed.
At your right side is a sharp drop-off. On your left
side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as
you. Directly in front of you is a galloping kangaroo
and your horse is unable to overtake it. Behind you
is a lion running at the same speed as you and the
kangaroo. What must you do to get out of this
dangerous situation?
Get off the merry-go-round and go home; you've
had enough excitement for one day...
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Post by cadoodlebug on Mar 15, 2023 1:31:24 GMT
Why don't ants have balls?
scroll down
Because they can't dance.
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