Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2023 22:35:11 GMT
I ended up signed out of my account and could not remember my password and just didn’t want to go to the trouble to reset.
First a few flower pics (oh how I’ve missed spring blooms) and one of the girls. Bean is now 6 months old and having her spay surgery tomorrow.
If you recall, my mom was sick and her actions had hurt me yet again. It’s been an awful few months for her…nothing but complications, more surgeries and at 82 yrs old certainty took its toll. I never did speak to her since I last posted, but honestly the last two months or so she’s not been able to speak.
There’s nothing left for the doctors to do and zero hope of any kind of recovery. They don’t think she’s in pain but she is very, VERY agitated. Pretty much screaming all day including calling for her “mommy” and referencing things that happened in her childhood.
My sister talked with doctors and reviewed my mothers health care directive. Sister and I talked last night and agreed that it was time.
Today, my mother’s nutrition has been removed and she is receiving Ativan and morphine every hour. The first dose didn’t touch her agitation but the second dose has helped.
I know that even if I had spoken to her before she went so far downhill, the conversation would’ve ended like the ones in the past when I told her how much her actions continued to hurt me.
I am not making the trip to OK to be by her bedside as she passes. She would not know I was there and my presence would bring her no peace. (She screams as my sister sits with her) I certainly know making the trip to see her will bring me no peace. I told my sister that I’d be happy to come out afterwards if she wanted or needed my help. I also told my sister that whatever decisions she made from this point forward, I fully support. There will be no war or second guessing. I think that brought my sister some peace knowing contacting me when hasty decisions may need to be made isn’t necessary. I trust she will do the right thing and what’s best.
I can’t help but wonder if some of my mother’s agitation could be the demons she’s clearly battled for so long.
I do hope her passing comes quickly so that my sister will be there. I also hope it’s peaceful.
she will be cremated and there will not be a service. My sister said that she doesn’t want to sit around and hear all of my mother’s acquaintances talk about how wonderful my mother was. The two of us know better
First a few flower pics (oh how I’ve missed spring blooms) and one of the girls. Bean is now 6 months old and having her spay surgery tomorrow.
If you recall, my mom was sick and her actions had hurt me yet again. It’s been an awful few months for her…nothing but complications, more surgeries and at 82 yrs old certainty took its toll. I never did speak to her since I last posted, but honestly the last two months or so she’s not been able to speak.
There’s nothing left for the doctors to do and zero hope of any kind of recovery. They don’t think she’s in pain but she is very, VERY agitated. Pretty much screaming all day including calling for her “mommy” and referencing things that happened in her childhood.
My sister talked with doctors and reviewed my mothers health care directive. Sister and I talked last night and agreed that it was time.
Today, my mother’s nutrition has been removed and she is receiving Ativan and morphine every hour. The first dose didn’t touch her agitation but the second dose has helped.
I know that even if I had spoken to her before she went so far downhill, the conversation would’ve ended like the ones in the past when I told her how much her actions continued to hurt me.
I am not making the trip to OK to be by her bedside as she passes. She would not know I was there and my presence would bring her no peace. (She screams as my sister sits with her) I certainly know making the trip to see her will bring me no peace. I told my sister that I’d be happy to come out afterwards if she wanted or needed my help. I also told my sister that whatever decisions she made from this point forward, I fully support. There will be no war or second guessing. I think that brought my sister some peace knowing contacting me when hasty decisions may need to be made isn’t necessary. I trust she will do the right thing and what’s best.
I can’t help but wonder if some of my mother’s agitation could be the demons she’s clearly battled for so long.
I do hope her passing comes quickly so that my sister will be there. I also hope it’s peaceful.
she will be cremated and there will not be a service. My sister said that she doesn’t want to sit around and hear all of my mother’s acquaintances talk about how wonderful my mother was. The two of us know better