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Post by getting started on Aug 21, 2023 1:28:09 GMT
I have been reading the threads from other peas who have moved/are moving parents into care facilities. I'm in a similar situation where my parents are prepping for a move. I read on mikklynn's thread that one person was shopping online for things her mom would need and my brain made that scratchy 'stop the record' sound. What would she need? I had imagined that my parents who are downsizing would have everything they need, too much even. So that got me thinking, there are probably lots of things I haven't thought of. What are your best tips for moving parents into care facilities? What worked for you? What helped them? What should we avoid? The care facility has been chosen, we're just waiting for the room to be ready sometime in the coming months. |
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Post by callmenutz on Aug 21, 2023 5:01:12 GMT
I moved my Mom into an Independent Living facility and she didn’t need anything. Basically all we had to do is figure out what furniture to take.
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Post by dewryce on Aug 21, 2023 5:05:51 GMT
What do you mean by care facility? Independent living, assisted living, skilled nursing facility, nursing home? The answers will probably vary widely depending on the type of facility.
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Post by lisae on Aug 21, 2023 11:38:57 GMT
My mother moved in the fall of 2020 so I couldn't even go to her room. When I finally got into her room months later, I realized her mattress was hard as stone. No wonder she hated sleeping in her room! When I asked the director about it, she said that a lot of people choose to bring their own mattress. Mother passed away soon after so we never got to change the mattress but I had already picked one out.
So I would evaluate the mattress and bedding provided (I had sent her favorite quilt) and be prepared to make changes if necessary.
Also there was little storage in the bathroom. Since she was in memory care, they didn't allow the residents to keep much in the bathroom anyway, but if this had been regular assisted living, I would have provided her more storage there.
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Post by mikklynn on Aug 21, 2023 12:29:15 GMT
My dad is moving into long term care, mom into assisted living. We are moving her furniture and most of what she needs tomorrow. My parents will move on Friday. Mom needs a new rubber sink mat, as hers is disgusting. She needs a shower curtain, liner, and rings as the shower doesn't have a door. She also needs a laundry cart that she can push to and from the laundry room down the hall. getting started Good luck with getting your parents moved. It's a lot to coordinate! My current frustration is how slow the facility is at getting the paperwork completed. That is made more complicated by having to deal with 2 different areas, so 2 different people. |
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Post by getting started on Aug 21, 2023 22:17:31 GMT
What do you mean by care facility? Independent living, assisted living, skilled nursing facility, nursing home? The answers will probably vary widely depending on the type of facility. Yes, good question. They are signed up for a facility where meals and cleaning are provided, no nursing care for now. However my dad is unlikely to live beyond 1-3 years based on the medical conditions he has. If/when my mom is on her own, this level of care would not be enough. She could definitely benefit from assisted living now. So my question is more general as we're starting at the lightest level of care but I could see that changing rapidly. I've had friends whose parents moved into some level of care and the parent whose illness/dementia etc was the worst of the two, progressed very rapidly with the change. I could see a future where if my dad is gone, my mom's already very diminished mental capacity would go downhill quickly. Her physical limits are already a struggle and without him to do things for her, she would need much more care than they are currently signed up for. |
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Post by getting started on Aug 21, 2023 22:21:03 GMT
My mother moved in the fall of 2020 so I couldn't even go to her room. When I finally got into her room months later, I realized her mattress was hard as stone. No wonder she hated sleeping in her room! When I asked the director about it, she said that a lot of people choose to bring their own mattress. Mother passed away soon after so we never got to change the mattress but I had already picked one out. So I would evaluate the mattress and bedding provided (I had sent her favorite quilt) and be prepared to make changes if necessary. Also there was little storage in the bathroom. Since she was in memory care, they didn't allow the residents to keep much in the bathroom anyway, but if this had been regular assisted living, I would have provided her more storage there. Thanks, this is helpful. It's made me think that the furniture they intend to take with them may not be practical when they don't have as many rooms with so much storage. They're in an apartment with an office and spare room. Those will both go away once they are in the retirement facility with a main living room and bedroom only. |
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Post by getting started on Aug 21, 2023 22:29:15 GMT
My dad is moving into long term care, mom into assisted living. We are moving her furniture and most of what she needs tomorrow. My parents will move on Friday. Mom needs a new rubber sink mat, as hers is disgusting. She needs a shower curtain, liner, and rings as the shower doesn't have a door. She also needs a laundry cart that she can push to and from the laundry room down the hall. getting started Good luck with getting your parents moved. It's a lot to coordinate! My current frustration is how slow the facility is at getting the paperwork completed. That is made more complicated by having to deal with 2 different areas, so 2 different people. Thanks. You triggered another thought. They intend to do their own laundry but my mom would be dependent on my dad to take the clothes down the hall to the laundry room and they would need a laundry cart. His mental and physical capacity is far better than hers however he is quite ill and with other medical conditions in addition to the latest illness, his prognosis is not good. If she moves from this facility to one that offers more care she might have different needs. |
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Post by KiwiJo on Aug 22, 2023 0:44:33 GMT
It’s hard, isn’t it!
I think for almost every person moving into assisted living, care homes, nursing homes, or whatever, it is vital that they have as much as possible that is familiar to them so that they feel it’s “home”. It’s often difficult for them anyway, but a lot of unfamiliar stuff means it can feel as though they are visitors there, that’s it isn’t their new home.
It might be furniture from their old home - the bed, chest of drawers, bedside table etc, or things to hang on the wall, ornaments…. Just things they are used to.
This is very important for people living with dementia because it can give them a sense of orientation; even if you don’t know whether they are aware of the things, they will be helping.
Look for multi-purpose things, whether from their old home or that you need to buy - the laundry cart is a good example. Don’t be tied into thinking you need to get something labelled a “laundry cart” when you might see something that could also be used to take books to and from the library or craft/workshop rooms etc. Also, think about storage of course - folding is good.
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Post by ntsf on Aug 22, 2023 0:50:31 GMT
visited my mother in law in a care home today. she has a lovely bedroom and living area.. and a comfy couch. she told us today that she doesn't use her bedroom any more.. sleeps on the couch. so the bed looks lovely with her quilt on it..
she's been there about 8 months.
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Post by calgaryscrapper on Aug 22, 2023 1:08:00 GMT
Some care homes prefer leather recliners over cloth ones as they can disinfect them better.
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Post by getting started on Aug 22, 2023 2:29:41 GMT
Look for multi-purpose things, whether from their old home or that you need to buy - the laundry cart is a good example. Don’t be tied into thinking you need to get something labelled a “laundry cart” when you might see something that could also be used to take books to and from the library or craft/workshop rooms etc. Also, think about storage of course - folding is good. Yes I've heard it's good to take familiar things too. Also, thanks for the guidance on the cart. The cart could be used by my dad for returning books and puzzles to their library. Great suggestion. |
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Post by getting started on Aug 22, 2023 2:31:08 GMT
visited my mother in law in a care home today. she has a lovely bedroom and living area.. and a comfy couch. she told us today that she doesn't use her bedroom any more.. sleeps on the couch. so the bed looks lovely with her quilt on it.. she's been there about 8 months. oh wow. I wonder why she prefers the couch to the bed? With my parents' arthritis and my mom's mobility issues the couch would not work. They'll definitely need the bed! Was the couch hers from before? |
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Post by brynn on Aug 22, 2023 3:20:19 GMT
Display photos of them in their before-care life.
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Post by calgaryscrapper on Aug 22, 2023 5:23:39 GMT
A visitor book or log in their room. My Mother in law would forget who had been there. Having the log in her room meant we could all tell when people had been there
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Post by redshoes on Aug 23, 2023 2:59:19 GMT
OP, given what you described as your parents health status, I would take as little as possible, with maybe a couple of items that are hobby/sentimental, etc. With every decline in health where greater assistance needed (especially mental decline), they may need to move to a different room/wing and each room results in less "stuff" needed. The rooms get smaller and/or they are semi-private. For my dad, we had about 7-10 days worth of clothes, basic toiletries/cleaning supplies, a small amount of snack foods (since all meals were provided) and a couple changes of sheets/blankets. His movie collection came with him because that was his only hobby.
Do NOT take anything overly valuable - theft is common unfortunately.
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Post by ntsf on Aug 23, 2023 16:50:15 GMT
getting started.. she has been known for years to sleep on couches.. in fact, we are staying at her house and doing the same.
I think she can't be bothered with the bed. the couch is good enough. even though she is 96, she is in fairly good shape.. was skiing into her mid 80's.. was a climber and backpacker.
her room is decorated with her quilts on the wall and photos.
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Kerri W
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,769 
Location: Kentucky
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Post by Kerri W on Aug 23, 2023 18:01:54 GMT
OP, given what you described as your parents health status, I would take as little as possible, with maybe a couple of items that are hobby/sentimental, etc. With every decline in health where greater assistance needed (especially mental decline), they may need to move to a different room/wing and each room results in less "stuff" needed. The rooms get smaller and/or they are semi-private. For my dad, we had about 7-10 days worth of clothes, basic toiletries/cleaning supplies, a small amount of snack foods (since all meals were provided) and a couple changes of sheets/blankets. His movie collection came with him because that was his only hobby. Do NOT take anything overly valuable - theft is common unfortunately. I think this is good advice. You want it to feely homey and comfortable but don't take a lot of extra stuff. Also keep in mind that first responders (EMTs) may need to be in the room-is there enough room for them to move around, get a gurney in, etc? Your loved one may need a wheelchair at some point-you don't want their "stuff" to be in the way. Another perspective to "theft"-most of our residents have dementia and dementia patients wander or accidentally go into other peoples rooms. They also take their belongings into common areas and leave them sitting. It is not uncommon for another resident to pick something up and think it belongs to them because they don't know any better-they have dementia. There is no ill-will associated with it. |
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