Adult Children's Birthday

Birthdays as adults are not a big deal in our family. I don't know if I've ever been with either of our kids on their actual birthday more than once or twice since they went away to college... and they're in their 30s now.

We live a 6 hr drive from our DD and in a different country than our son.
We always call, I often send a fun singing ecard.
Gift giving is not something we do "because the calendar says" its a gift giving time.
We give spontaneous gifts, most often experiential ones, when moved to do so, and we give monetary gifts from time to time to make their lives a little easier.

That said, I sure am glad that they were born!! And they know it.

Also, both kids are minimalists and buy what they want and need, for the most part.

We have one adult child who lives at home so he can save for a house. Ehat we do depends on the year and what his needs/wants are. We always go out to dinner and I make corned beef and cabbage at some point close to his bday. His gift next year will be us paying for half of his cost to go to Mexico (with us for a wedding. And that will also be his main christmas gift)

I cook what ever there request is for dinner and all the kids and SO's come to eat and spend time together as a family. They also get a gift from me.

We do a family meal. We used to all go out to dinner as a family when they were in their 20s. Once they hit 35, we started either having dinner at their home or ours and singing happy birthday.

Two of my kids live about 5 hours away by plane and the third is about 6 hours by car so I rarely get to see them on their birthdays. Their birthdays aren't near any holidays and they all work full time so while I do get to see them a couple of times a year, it rarely works out that it is at birthday time.

I send a gift and a gift card to a special food place near them.

And I admit to being jealous of those who have their kids closer but it is what it is and I am thankful for all the ways to keep in touch these days.

My son is 20. We still give him a gift, usually money b/c that's what he wants, and cook him a special meal.

My parents still give me a gift, and do we do a big birthday dinner b/c we have a bunch of December birthdays (me, my dad, and both of my kids).

DS,30, lives across the country from me so we don't see each other much on our birthdays. Except this year I'm spending mine with him in DC. He's already got something planned as a surprise so I'm anxious to go in a month!

venmo cash and a phone call, if we're not together.

Depends on what they want. My Sept bday dd (27)asked for a Halloween themed party last year so we made dinner and invited about 6 friends over. Theme was easy to decorate for! This year she wanted cash for a tattoo. She was making apple crisp so no cake. I got Covid so no dinner. We’ll get together later.

My ds (25) got a surprise, bowling party this year, because I feel guilty that I never threw him a party. He never wants one. It was fun! He enjoyed it. My ex spoiled the surprise but ds hid it well!

A nice gift and dinner out. The youngest is 4 hrs away, so we usually go spend the wkend with her, and take her out. our bdays are only 2 days apart, so it's a nice time out for me also.

My mom's love language is gifts so birthdays have always been a big deal for her (and us). As we've had our own children and once both my parents retired, the amount or type of gifts have decreased or changed but my mom would never stop altogether. 

My parents host a weekly family dinner so we would celebrate someone's (kid or adult) at the family dinner closest to their birthday although I host it at my house when it's my, my fiance's, or one of my kids' birthdays. The person we are celebrating is able to request a birthday meal of their choice + a cake (that is always made by my mom). Adults receive one gift from my parents (as opposed to the grandkids who usually receive 2 or 3) as well as one each from the other adults/couples present.

I'm much more of an experience person so when my children are adults, that's what I will focus on doing for them (whether it's an experience with me or an experience for them to enjoy with whomever they like).

My oldest is an adult but in college; they work and live at home during the summer and have an August birthday. I always get them a present, and we usually go out for dinner, although this year was 21 and they celebrated with their friends (the horror!)

My kids are little still but my parents send us each (and our spouses on their bday) $100 check. Then we get together some weekend that is near our day and have family lunch or dinner at our house or my parents house or my sisters house. We live 90 min from my sister and parents. My siblings/their spouses that live in another state just get checks.

My DH’s mom never remembers anyones birthday.  Like she legit doesn’t EVER call DH or his sister on their birthday or even after go with them a happy birthday.  She lives 20 min from us. It’s horrible and I feel really bad for DH and his sister because their own mother who gave birth to them can’t be bothered to remember.  I even put everyone’s birthdays into her phone and set reminders and put them on yearly repeat.  No excuses.  God forbid we forget HER birthday- she would never let us forget that.

my DH’s dad never forgets his birthday.  They live out of the area so it’s usually a text/phone call and that’s that.

We have dinner at home together and they receive a present from us as well.