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Post by katlady on Feb 17, 2024 18:15:42 GMT
I don't know why I've been thinking about this lately, but I was wondering at what age SO and I will stop having pets. I would love to have pets forever, but I realize that as we get older we may not always be able to care for them properly. And then what happens to them after we pass. Hopefully they will be taken in by family or friends, but what if they are not. I cry a little inside to think my dog (or cat) may end up in a shelter. You read about it often. As long as our health holds out, we hope to have pets for another 20 years. But once we get to our mid-80's, I just don't know.
Will you always have pets? Do you have something set up so they are taken care of? And yes, I know something can happen today, but I am thinking more about when we are old.
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Post by 950nancy on Feb 17, 2024 18:24:26 GMT
I do think about it. I know one of my dogs would be snatched up by either my kids or a good friend. The other one might be SOL. Ha. She is super ornery. She is a breed that people want, so I am not worried, but I always think you need to have a good plan. Accidents happen at every age.
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Post by Lexica on Feb 17, 2024 18:54:06 GMT
I have given this a lot of thought myself. I adore my pets and since I am single, they are my pseudo family that welcomes me home and keeps me company. I have decided that when I am no longer able to commit to having pets of my own, I will volunteer to foster kittens or puppies or both. The facilities that place unwanted animals do not have the space and personnel to look after them in house so they foster them out. Yes it will break my heart every time one of the babies needs to leave me, but at least I will know they are going to a hopefully loving permanent home. My other option is to provide end of life housing for older dogs.
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Post by Linda on Feb 17, 2024 18:56:57 GMT
Dh and I have talked about how the kittens we got in 2021 are likely to be the last kittens - we might adopt additional older cats down the road (we adopted a 6.5 y/o in October and also have an almost 14 y/o we've had since he was born) but given that we're already 53/54 - and we've had a couple of cats live to 19-20 already, we're not sure we'll want to committ to another 20 years when we're 60 or so. Especially since, in our experience, super-senior cats are significantly more work...between dementia and incontinence.
My mother talked about how much she missed having a dog and how much she wished she could get another one in her last couple of years. My sister and I (neither of whom are dog people - she has no pets and I have cats only) are VERY grateful that she didn't adopt one in her early 80s because neither of us would have wanted to take it on but one of us probably would have had to.
I do think my kids would take our cats if we passed before the cats did - they all love cats - but the older two already have two of their own that we fostered in the fall for them - and the 6 altogether were a bit much...their female and our female made it clear they both needed to be the ONLY female in the household and our newest kitty didn't really settle in until after their two moved out (all three came here at the same time).
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Post by lisae on Feb 17, 2024 18:59:35 GMT
I really haven't thought about that aspect of it at all. I guess because we have always had outdoor cats, as have most of my family members, rehoming them isn't as challenging. We lost our last kitty last spring and I wanted to wait awhile before getting another so this is my first break from having a cat since my early 20's. I miss having a cat but I also like the freedom from caregiving any creature except me and DH for now.
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Post by Zee on Feb 17, 2024 19:05:08 GMT
I know some day I won't be able to have a house full of pets like I do now, but I dread that day! I'm so happy when I look at them. They bring me joy that is so easy and simple.
Maybe when that day gets nearer I'll provide a home for older, less adoptable cats. I would love to foster kittens but if I'm too old for pets then I'm probably too old to keep up with baby animals, and their tiny claws and wild zooming are bad with frail skin.
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Post by melanieg on Feb 17, 2024 19:13:52 GMT
We had dogs growing up. When our last pup passed away, mom and dad did not get another. They have both said they miss having a dog around, but they enjoy the freedom of not having to find a sitter or a place that will allow them to stay with a dog. When the feels hit them hard, they babysit my sister's dog (and they babysat my bothers too before they had to put her down). I myself am not mature enough for the responsibility of having a dog. However I am the most awesomest auntie to them  |
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Post by Bitchy Rich on Feb 17, 2024 19:24:43 GMT
I told my son I will bequeath all my money to whatever pets I have, and if he wants the money he should stick with them.
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Post by Lexica on Feb 17, 2024 20:00:36 GMT
I want to say that I really respect and appreciate those of you that take your pets’ future into consideration should they outlive you. I now have two cats. One is from the three that I adopted as tiny wild kittens many years ago and the other I found in my old neighborhood. He looks just like my cat that passed recently. One afternoon I saw what I thought was my male in my front yard and freaked that he had somehow gotten out. He was my jailbreak kitty that would make a run for the great outdoors whenever he could. He didn’t want to stay outside, he would always follow me back inside, but there was always fear that he would run into the street. He had no awareness of danger. His two siblings would sit at the open front door and look out, but never attempt to go out.
When I ran outside to get him, I realized he wasn’t my cat. But he ran to me when I went out front and seemed so hungry that I immediately brought out bowls of food and water for him. He gulped it down. To shorten the story, after feeding him outside for months, my neighbor’s son came to visit them and saw the cat on my porch. He came over and told me that the cat had lived with his friend at the end of our street. He had died months ago from terminal cancer. He had left his house to the guy who was living with him under the conditions that he would take care of the cat. The guy sold the house and moved immediately after the guy died, leaving the cat outside to fend for itself. I had no idea. I immediately took the cat to my vet and began the process of integrating him with my cats. I felt guilty for not feeding him more than I did. I really assumed he had a home nearby. He was much too friendly to be a wild stray.
The neighbor’s son told me this guy wanted a kitten to keep him company, knowing full well he wouldn’t live that much longer. That angered me. Yes, I guess he tried to make arrangements for the cat for when he died, but not with someone reliable. Luckily my male adored him and they all got along very well. Two of my original cats have passed on and there is the one female remaining. When she goes, I will be left with my neighbor’s cat. He really is a great kitty and he transitioned well to being an indoor only cat. I don’t regret taking him in at all, I just wish that the terminally ill neighbor would have thought about the cat and what would happen to him after he died. I think it was selfish and cruel.
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Post by monklady123 on Feb 17, 2024 20:07:30 GMT
My dh and I have thought about this. We've only ever had one pet (together.... we both had pets as kids), our sweet girl who's my avatar photo. She went over the Rainbow Bridge two years ago at age 15. We got her when she was 9 months old. Both dh and I do not want another 15-year dog because at our age who knows where we'll be in 15 years. But we've both talked about adopting a senior dog so we could give him or her a soft cushy life for whatever years they have left. We haven't quite gotten to the point of doing it though. We've been compensating for no dog in our life by taking care of dogs whose owners are out of town. Only one at a time, and only people whose dogs we know.
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Post by alsomsknit on Feb 17, 2024 20:44:55 GMT
We have 4. Two cats, two dogs. One is a 4.5 month old puppy. Yes, I do think about what will happen to my pets if anything happens to me/us when we die. My Lil Bit will be 15 yo in a couple of months. The cats are getting close to 10 years old.
If history continues, the puppy will hopefully be with us for 15 years. Thinking of getting another puppy when this one is about 3. The goal is to have a fence put up before then.
I’ve already had a discussion with my son about taking on any pets. Right now, he is agreeable. Before I would get a puppy in my/our 70s, I will have another discussion with my son, including choice of said puppy. If he isn’t willing to take on my dog (or cat), I simply will not get one.
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bethany102399
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,521 
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Post by bethany102399 on Feb 17, 2024 20:53:29 GMT
We've thought about this too. DH and I have joint issues and while George will have a long healthy life with us (he turns 8 next month) he will be our last giant breed dog. I love giant breeds, but the reality is we can't care for them the way they need to be cared for anymore and that's not fair to them or us. I was talking to the trainer who did our puppy classes about this and she was commenting on how so many people don't think ahead. She teaches classes with people who are seniors who have always had Shepards so they get a Shepard puppy and just can't care for it the way they need to.
The reality is while we will get another dog (Dh thinks George is our last one silly man) it won't be one that is so big they won't be able to be walked safely by either of us.
I will also say I know of a senior who adopts senior dogs and cats specifically, as she doesn't' want the puppy energy and knows there's a need. In that vein I hope to support people who rehome giant breeds when needed even if I can't welcome one into my own home anymore.
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Post by Ramona on Feb 17, 2024 21:13:31 GMT
My children got me a dog (with my permission) two years after my husband and previous dog(two months apart) had passed. I thought I would never want another dog, but I love her so much.
It is very lonely here, my kids live several hours away, She takes care of me. Before I agreed to the new puppy, my daughter promised to continue to care for her. My worry now is if I die at home, how long would she be alone before anyone would find us.
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Post by papersilly on Feb 17, 2024 21:15:16 GMT
I think about this often. Our current dog is turning 16. He will probably be it until we retire in a few short years. Once we're settled in to our new home, I think I would like to still have dogs.
I've been donating to a group that finds final foster homes for senior dogs. We are retiring to their area. We've always adopted slightly older dogs so we would be used to senior dogs. we probably have a good chance of outliving them so I don't have to worry much about leaving a younger dog behind. In case it happens, we have family who will take them.
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Post by busy on Feb 17, 2024 21:16:20 GMT
My parents got their last cat when they were in their early 70s. She was a rescue and about 8-10 when they adopted her. She lived 8 more years. My stepfather was 80 and my mom was 79 when she passed and the decided that would have to be their last pet. They really miss having a cat but they know if they get a young cat, it would probably outlive them and rehoming is stressful. But an older cat has more care needs that they just don’t feel equipped to manage in the near future.
It’s sad, as they’ve always had a cat or two and they miss the companionship, but I think it’s the responsible choice for their current circumstances.
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Post by summer on Feb 17, 2024 21:31:01 GMT
My grandmother was worried what would happen to her cat in the event she passed away first. She told all her kids and grandkids that she was leaving money for the care of her cat to whomever would take him in. It was a substantial amount. The cat passed away before my grandmother did which worked out for the best as we all had our own pets and her cat was really unfriendly.
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Nanner
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,962
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Post by Nanner on Feb 17, 2024 21:31:57 GMT
My parents are 84 and 90 and their dog is 11.
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Post by ntsf on Feb 17, 2024 21:48:24 GMT
we have only had one dog (cause our son couldn't find housing for him and a dog years ago.).. I don't see getting another pet after he dies.. dog is 13. it is too much hassle with travel and such.. though my dh loves having him around. we are late 60's--early 70's.
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leeny
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,631
Location: Northern California
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Jun 27, 2014 1:55:53 GMT
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Post by leeny on Feb 17, 2024 21:57:04 GMT
I don't know yet. I never had animals growing up because I was allergic. DH had dogs all his life. Fast forward to the time our adult son adopted a dog before asking for permission from his landlord. That dog (mix of Chihuahua, Boston terrier, Chinese crested) lived with us temporarily for 12 years and I discovered I wasn't allergic to him. Then a few years after we adopted a Rat Terrier. After the first dog passed away we talked about getting another, but never did. Our Rat Terrier is about 14 years old now. We have been going through some health challenges so have put adding another dog on hold. We have talked that if we would get another dog, it would be an adult. Neither of us have the energy for a puppy. Our daughter would take our current dog if needed because he is the half-sister of one of her dogs.
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Post by mom on Feb 17, 2024 21:59:12 GMT
We have one dog right now and I know my boys or my extended family would grab him in a minuet should DH and I pass while Scouty is alive. Everyone loves Scouty, lol. DH and I do have a section in our will that provides a stipend every month for whoever takes care of Scouty until he dies. But realistically, Scouty is 12 and probably wont outlive DH and I.
What DH and I are currently thinking about is once Scouty passes, will we get another dog. We love having a dog but we also travel a bit and it is somewhat hard to travel and leave behind our dog with a sitter. My gut tells me, though, that yes, we will get another dog once Scouty is no longer with us. We will see, though.
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Post by rhhdk on Feb 17, 2024 22:04:50 GMT
We had that talk with MIL & FIL 10-12 years ago, as their dog got older, my MIL wasn’t sure about getting a new one. And we couldn’t imagine her without a dog.
DH and I made the promise, if they got a new dog, we would take over if they couldn’t take care of it any longer.
They didn’t have the energy to train a poppy, so about 5 years ago they adopted my SILs dog, it’s a small one.
My MIL passed 1 1/2 years ago, and we have had the dog ever since, as my FIL couldn’t take care of her.
We had dogs 30 years ago, and didn’t plan to have any before we retire in 7 years, but now we have a small 10 year old princess
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Post by christine58 on Feb 17, 2024 22:17:09 GMT
I don't know why I've been thinking about this lately, but I was wondering at what age SO and I will stop having pets. I would love to have pets forever, but I realize that as we get older we may not always be able to care for them properly. And then what happens to them after we pass. Hopefully they will be taken in by family or friends, but what if they are not. I cry a little inside to think my dog (or cat) may end up in a shelter. You read about it often. As long as our health holds out, we hope to have pets for another 20 years. But once we get to our mid-80's, I just don't know. Will you always have pets? Do you have something set up so they are taken care of? And yes, I know something can happen today, but I am thinking more about when we are old. I am 65 and have an almost 6-year-old yellow lab. When she passes that’s it, there will be no more animals. If I had to do it all over again, I would not have gotten my yellow lab. It’s hard and $$$ to board her when I travel. Although I love her to death |
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Post by littlemama on Feb 17, 2024 22:25:46 GMT
I want to say that I really respect and appreciate those of you that take your pets’ future into consideration should they outlive you. I now have two cats. One is from the three that I adopted as tiny wild kittens many years ago and the other I found in my old neighborhood. He looks just like my cat that passed recently. One afternoon I saw what I thought was my male in my front yard and freaked that he had somehow gotten out. He was my jailbreak kitty that would make a run for the great outdoors whenever he could. He didn’t want to stay outside, he would always follow me back inside, but there was always fear that he would run into the street. He had no awareness of danger. His two siblings would sit at the open front door and look out, but never attempt to go out. When I ran outside to get him, I realized he wasn’t my cat. But he ran to me when I went out front and seemed so hungry that I immediately brought out bowls of food and water for him. He gulped it down. To shorten the story, after feeding him outside for months, my neighbor’s son came to visit them and saw the cat on my porch. He came over and told me that the cat had lived with his friend at the end of our street. He had died months ago from terminal cancer. He had left his house to the guy who was living with him under the conditions that he would take care of the cat. The guy sold the house and moved immediately after the guy died, leaving the cat outside to fend for itself. I had no idea. I immediately took the cat to my vet and began the process of integrating him with my cats. I felt guilty for not feeding him more than I did. I really assumed he had a home nearby. He was much too friendly to be a wild stray. The neighbor’s son told me this guy wanted a kitten to keep him company, knowing full well he wouldn’t live that much longer. That angered me. Yes, I guess he tried to make arrangements for the cat for when he died, but not with someone reliable. Luckily my male adored him and they all got along very well. Two of my original cats have passed on and there is the one female remaining. When she goes, I will be left with my neighbor’s cat. He really is a great kitty and he transitioned well to being an indoor only cat. I don’t regret taking him in at all, I just wish that the terminally ill neighbor would have thought about the cat and what would happen to him after he died. I think it was selfish and cruel. But, the guy did think about the pet and made provisions for him. He cant help that the person he trusted didnt follow his wishes |
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Post by katlady on Feb 17, 2024 22:31:35 GMT
We did think that maybe we'll adopt older senior dogs/cats. They do come with a lot of work, and medical issues, though. Lexica That is sad that the guy did not follow on his friend's wishes. I don't blame the one that passed away. He though his cat would be taken care of. So sad though. |
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Post by Zee on Feb 17, 2024 22:37:27 GMT
We did think that maybe we'll adopt older senior dogs/cats. They do come with a lot of work, and medical issues, though. Lexica That is sad that the guy did not follow on his friend's wishes. I don't blame the one that passed away. He though his cat would be taken care of. So sad though. I agree how sad, that would be one of my biggest fears about having a pet and dying first. I have 5 cats right now (don't judge, it just happened! Lol) and I know my kids would take them. My dog would have a home with many people, I know. But after this bunch of pets I'm just not sure I want to worry about what might happen. My last cat was a real bastard to everyone but me, my husband, and my daughter and the thought of anyone not wanting him used to really upset me. 😭 Not that I could blame anyone! But still, he was my heart. |
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Post by epeanymous on Feb 17, 2024 22:39:48 GMT
I am 51 and have a dog who will be two in a few months, and cats who are five. When these go, that will be it for me. My dog is a rescue from a home with elderly folks who were not able to keep up with him.
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Post by Patter on Feb 17, 2024 22:51:25 GMT
My parent's precious girl will be 17 in April; they are 81 and 79. This is their last dog. Just too hard for them. I have also said that my two precious boys will be my last (they are 9). They are large breed and take a lot of work. My arthritis is getting terrible, and I'm sad that I can't just come and go as I please. I doubt we have another dog after they go. I have never been without a dog but I think the freedom might be a bit nice while I can still move a little.  And I certainly would not want a dog to outlive me. That's so sad if there aren't acceptable arrangements made. |
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Post by Lexica on Feb 17, 2024 22:52:52 GMT
But, the guy did think about the pet and made provisions for him. He cant help that the person he trusted didnt follow his wishes Yes, but the guy he chose was a known flake apparently. I questioned the neighbor’s son about him. I was thinking that perhaps since this was an outdoor cat that he could not find him when it was time to leave and that maybe I could find contact info to let him know that I had the cat and he could come get him. The guy told me that he knew that this guy wasn’t going to follow through. I asked if he told the dying guy so that he could make other plans and found out that he, meaning my neighbor’s son, didn’t learn about the arrangements until after the guy’s funeral. Whatever provisions you set up need to be with someone trustworthy. The owner would have been better off asking his vet for a referral or contacting a facility that is a no kill shelter to take him. ETA, I don’t blame the guy for hoping his friend would take the cat, but I do think it was selfish to get a kitten when he knew he had only a year or two to live. Or if he really wanted a kitten, leave the proceeds from the sale of his house to a no kill shelter with a guarantee that they would take it upon his death instead of a flakey friend. |
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Post by scrappintoee on Feb 18, 2024 1:29:04 GMT
My children got me a dog (with my permission) two years after my husband and previous dog(two months apart) had passed. I thought I would never want another dog, but I love her so much. It is very lonely here, my kids live several hours away, She takes care of me. Before I agreed to the new puppy, my daughter promised to continue to care for her. My worry now is if I die at home, how long would she be alone before anyone would find us.When my Dad lived alone, I texted or called him every day (sometimes twice) to be sure he was okay. If he didn't reply within several hours, we arranged someone to check on him. I also got him a bracelet to wear in case he fell and couldn't get to the phone. Maybe your kids could start doing that?  |
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mich5481
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,547
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Post by mich5481 on Feb 18, 2024 3:15:49 GMT
I'm younger than most/all of you, and I think I have my last pets.
One of our shelties is 12.5 and has doggie dementia. Our Shih Tzu turns 12 next month, and I'm not sure how long she has left given the invasive (but benign) tumor growing on the roof of her mouth. Our yorkie will be 11 soon, and my mom's other sheltie will be 9 next month.
My sheltie is about 1.5 years old - I got her in October 2022 after my other sheltie passed away in May 2022.
I found out last March that I am allergic to dogs, so that is a factor is not getting another pet. They are also a lot of work, expense, and stress. I love all of our dogs, but there are a lot of logistics that go into taking care of them, especially as they age. I don't know that my heart could handle taking in senior dogs, so I don't think that is an option for me when my current pack crosses the rainbow bridge.
Since I am single and childless, I don't know who would take in my pets if any of them outlive me. While you never know what will happen in the future, I think I have come to terms with not getting new dogs in the future. Maybe I'll be a crazy goldfish lady when I'm old. 🐠🤣
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And I certainly would not want a dog to outlive me. That's so sad if there aren't acceptable arrangements made.
