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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jul 6, 2014 1:20:31 GMT
I love reading them.
Love the fantasy of two people clicking and being destined to be together.
But lord help me, every sex scene includes him giving her her orgasm first, and it's always "earth shattering, the world fell into a million shimmering pieces that twinkled like diamonds" blah blah blah.
I get it. It's fiction. I have to just go with it. But just once, let there be a scene that isn't so comically over the top.
(unless of course everyone always has earth shattering, shimmering like diamond sex, and it's just me that doesn't relate.)
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Post by SockMonkey on Jul 6, 2014 1:24:32 GMT
I can't read that crap. I read, like, a couple of pages of that craptastic 50 Shades business, and it was like that. There are far too many good books out there for me to tolerate that garbage.
I think the closest thing I've read has been the Sookie Stackhouse books, which are pretty much romance novels, I guess. But, I found myself skimming the sex scenes to get to the other stuff. I'm more of a fantasy/sci-fi fan, so those parts of the books appealed to me far more! Haha!
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Post by candleangie on Jul 6, 2014 1:24:39 GMT
LOL...No joke!
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Post by SockMonkey on Jul 6, 2014 1:25:19 GMT
Sometimes the descriptions of body parts are just... weird and gross, too.
Shaft.
Button.
Love totem.
Oh, DO shut up.
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Post by dulcemama on Jul 6, 2014 1:28:07 GMT
It's just you  |
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Post by hop2 on Jul 6, 2014 1:34:34 GMT
I actually think males should be required to read those |
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Deleted
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Jun 16, 2024 8:53:35 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 6, 2014 1:34:36 GMT
Sheesh, it really is terrible isn't it? All that heaving and stroking and breathlessness. Um. No.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jul 6, 2014 1:37:48 GMT
I can't read that crap. I read, like, a couple of pages of that craptastic 50 Shades business, and it was like that. There are far too many good books out there for me to tolerate that garbage. I think the closest thing I've read has been the Sookie Stackhouse books, which are pretty much romance novels, I guess. But, I found myself skimming the sex scenes to get to the other stuff. I'm more of a fantasy/sci-fi fan, so those parts of the books appealed to me far more! Haha! I haven't read the fifty shades books. They got such poor reviews that I haven't devoted time to them. I did, however, like the sookie books. |
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jul 6, 2014 1:38:46 GMT
Sometimes the descriptions of body parts are just... weird and gross, too. Shaft. Button. Love totem. Oh, DO shut up. Love totem?!   |
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jul 6, 2014 1:39:28 GMT
It's just you I thought so.  |
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Post by lucyg on Jul 6, 2014 1:39:53 GMT
Not all romance novels are crap. Some very fine writers got their start in writing romance and/or have stayed there producing unnoticed (by the mainstream literary/library establishment) gems. You want to read some quality romantic fiction, go get yourself some Carla Kelly (she has written fairly clean Regency romance for decades), Laura Kinsale, or Kate Moore (actually, they all write Regencies and Regency-set historicals ... I guess that tells you where the brains congregate).
ETA 50 Shades is not romance fiction. It's soft porn. I don't know about Sookie. For the record, Danielle Steel never wrote a genre romance in her life.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jul 6, 2014 1:41:34 GMT
I actually think males should be required to read those Yeah, if only..... But then they'd wonder why were aren't all perfect, voluptuous and big breasted yet skinny, women who always look so perfect and desirable. |
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Post by SockMonkey on Jul 6, 2014 1:42:46 GMT
I actually think males should be required to read those Now you KNOW guys don't pay attention to instructions. |
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Post by anxiousmom on Jul 6, 2014 1:43:02 GMT
I read a couple of those types of romance books years ago-at the same time my mother read them as well. We have a running joke about "with violet eyes flashing, arms akimbo, she looked warily at his throbbing member." |
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Post by lucyg on Jul 6, 2014 1:44:27 GMT
I don't think you guys are reading real romance fiction. No one I know writes like that.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jul 6, 2014 1:44:44 GMT
Not all romance novels are crap. Some very fine writers got their start in writing romance and/or have stayed there producing unnoticed (by the mainstream literary/library establishment) gems. You want to read some quality romantic fiction, go get yourself some Carla Kelly (she has written fairly clean Regency romance for decades), Laura Kinsale, or Kate Moore (actually, they all write Regencies and Regency-set historicals ... I guess that tells you where the brains congregate). Oh, don't get me wrong. I LOVE romance novels, and don't think they're crap. I was whining more on the fact that every female character has a perfect sexual experience every single time. And every orgasm is just an incredible, make you go blind, kind of thing. No male characters ever finish before the female has her bra unhooked, leaving her wondering why she missed the first three minutes of her favorite show for that. |
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jul 6, 2014 1:45:41 GMT
I actually think males should be required to read those Now you KNOW guys don't pay attention to instructions.  |
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jul 6, 2014 1:46:26 GMT
I read a couple of those types of romance books years ago-at the same time my mother read them as well. We have a running joke about "with violet eyes flashing, arms akimbo, she looked warily at his throbbing member." I'm dying! |
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samantha25
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,939 
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Post by samantha25 on Jul 6, 2014 1:46:59 GMT
I noticed that the free romance novels on the Kindle are really cheesy too. Could only tolerate a few and realized free is cheesy.
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Post by tinafb on Jul 6, 2014 1:58:47 GMT
I often think that many of the heroines are due for a whopping UTI with all the nookie they're having.
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Post by SockMonkey on Jul 6, 2014 1:58:50 GMT
Akimbo. Hahahahaha. They love that word.
Violet eyes. Seriously? Aliens have violet eyes.
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Post by happyOCgirl on Jul 6, 2014 1:59:31 GMT
I just read one yesterday that referred to short hand, typing on a typewriter, velour, big gold belts, and off the shoulder cabbage rose dresses. About halfway through, I checked the date...1982. The only part that didn't show it's age were the sex scenes! ;-)
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Post by anxiousmom on Jul 6, 2014 2:01:18 GMT
I just read one yesterday that referred to short hand, typing on a typewriter, velour, big gold belts, and off the shoulder cabbage rose dresses. About halfway through, I checked the date...1982. The only part that didn't show it's age were the sex scenes! ;-) My mother makes her Christmas list in shorthand. Drives all of us insane. |
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calgal08
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,519
Jun 27, 2014 15:43:46 GMT
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Post by calgal08 on Jul 6, 2014 2:01:27 GMT
I actually think males should be required to read those Now you KNOW guys don't pay attention to instructions. LOL - isn't that the truth |
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Post by keknj on Jul 6, 2014 2:02:13 GMT
Not all romance novels are crap. Some very fine writers got their start in writing romance and/or have stayed there producing unnoticed (by the mainstream literary/library establishment) gems. You want to read some quality romantic fiction, go get yourself some Carla Kelly (she has written fairly clean Regency romance for decades), Laura Kinsale, or Kate Moore (actually, they all write Regencies and Regency-set historicals ... I guess that tells you where the brains congregate). Oh, don't get me wrong. I LOVE romance novels, and don't think they're crap. I was whining more on the fact that every female character has a perfect sexual experience every single time. And every orgasm is just an incredible, make you go blind, kind of thing. No male characters ever finish before the female has her bra unhooked, leaving her wondering why she missed the first three minutes of her favorite show for that.
LOL. |
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Post by melanell on Jul 6, 2014 2:04:14 GMT
Sometimes the descriptions of body parts are just... weird and gross, too. Shaft. Button. Love totem. Oh, DO shut up. Love totem?! Yeah, I've read shaft and button way too many times, but I have never had to endure reading about a Love Totem! |
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Post by irisheyes on Jul 6, 2014 2:04:38 GMT
I used to love romance novels, but for some reason I grew out of them and can no longer tolerate reading cheesy sex scenes. I just can't do it anymore. I think I would go blind from the extreme eye-rolling that would go on if I read one now. I still like romance in a novel, but it can't be cheesy, the heroine has to be strong, and I don't want to read descriptions about anyone's orgasms.
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Post by melanell on Jul 6, 2014 2:04:39 GMT
I just read one yesterday that referred to short hand, typing on a typewriter, velour, big gold belts, and off the shoulder cabbage rose dresses. About halfway through, I checked the date...1982. The only part that didn't show it's age were the sex scenes! ;-) My mother makes her Christmas list in shorthand. Drives all of us insane. My mother does the same! |
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Post by Belia on Jul 6, 2014 2:07:24 GMT
No male characters ever finish before the female has her bra unhooked, leaving her wondering why she missed the first three minutes of her favorite show for that.HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  |
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Post by Dori~Mama~Bear on Jul 6, 2014 2:27:07 GMT
I love romance novels. I love the ones I can read in a day or 2. usually get them from amazon.
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