s/o RSVPs and party no-shows

We always have people who don't RSVP and no-shows and my kids have never been crushed.

It was always a few close friends when my girls were small. Would I feel the way you do now? Probably. I would REALLY resent having to invite the whole class just because it had become PC to do so.....if it even has in the UK.

Family-centric birthdays at home...totally rock. We have always gone small and now that we've moved, extended family can be involved. It's a major perk.

I've only had one big party for one of my daughters. She was turning 5. She  is almost 13 and has absolutly no recollection of the party at all. We do family parties or an outing with one or two friends. Some of these parties are more for the parents to "outdo" the other parties.

You must believe in miracles!

I think a compromise in terms of not having parties at places that cost alot, have alot of other people, have an activity going on... these include bounce places, gyms, laser tag, paint ball, ChuckECheese type places, mini golf, etc.

A party at your house or a neighborhood park or playground can be so much fun and low cost and people can bring other kids and it doesn't matter. I had all kinds of parties right at my house or close by and always had the kids show up. I pretty much limited invitees to neighborhood kids who just walked over at party time.

My kids' parties lasted an hour to an hour and a half - an activity or two, cake, and present opening, go home or hang around and play. I had scavenger hunts, bike obstacle courses, water games, ice cream sundae bars, video games, pillow fights, races, and stuff like that.

On a few birthdays I took a few kids to the movies, I picked them up we went to the movie, had popcorn and sodas, drove back to my house for cake and presents, then drive them home. I always provided the transportation thus limiting the number of attendees and the number of no shows.

I think parties have gotten so out of hand and over the top that people are starting to opt out. If you have 2 or 3 kids who are all invited to various parties, you could end up spending every weekend at a kid's party. It gets to be too much. Plus kids are involved in other things and just not available. Time to tone it all down and get back to basics.

There are oodles of other great ways to celebrate besides a party with classmates, so go for it.  

Invite a few good friends to go out for a day with the birthday child, or have a smaller party, or a family party.  Take a mini-vacation or a weekend trip.  Go somewhere special for dinner, dessert, or just for the day.   Buy tickets for a special show or concert.

Or just pamper the birthday child at home for the day with their favorite activities, a break from chores, favorite meals, cake & a few gifts.

The possibilities are endless and most don't involves RSVPs at all.  

We've been lucky, we rarely had no-shows and most people RSVP'd when we had parties. I think the key is we only invite friends. I've never liked the idea of inviting an entire class of kids some of whom my child doesn't know well. So we just stick with close friends. We got lucky in the neighborhood that we raised our girls in was chock full of girls their ages, so I knew the parents of these kids, too.

I think birthday parties are great. I also think parents have made them stressful over the top events.

My kids have been to parties at places that cost 100s of dollars and to some that are sleepovers with pizza and hot dogs and they love going to both. The birthday boy has a great time at both.

I remember reading a thread here once where someone said they don't put the address on the invite so people have to RSVP.

Tbh the one party I threw at a place that cost $265 was way less stressful and less work for me so it was worth it, I had family in from out of town so I didn't want to be cooking all day and cleaning when I could be hanging out with family. That being said this year we're doing a party at home but we're doing a themed party, I'm collaborating with a friend and we're doing a lot of crafts but using mostly recycled stuff, so its really cheap, but a lot more work. We're having fun though and our kids will share the party, I figure its one less party for our playgroup with mostly may birthdays to have to go to.

When the kids were little, we had a few parties. It was mostly family and almost everyone showed up. Once we moved out of state, we stopped having the big party. Last year, my sons invited one friend. We ordered a cake, balloons, decorations, food. Well that kid ended up not coming because his mom wasn't feeling well.
We made the most of it. We had cake for days though.