rickmer
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,137 
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Post by rickmer on May 28, 2015 16:46:35 GMT
I look at craig's list personals and missed connections to kill time occasionally, and found this lovely little nugget:
toronto.craigslist.ca/tor/m4w/5042745752.html
it's LONG but since he is so detailed, I found it rather amusing. it appears he is looking for a nympho clean living taylor swift look alike with no body hair, who must done to the nines at all times and must never wear flip flops anywhere but the beach. he goes on (and on. and on) about what he has to offer, I am just not sure any of his "offerings" are that appealing (strong minded, determined, opinionated). and he can tell if you have not consumed enough water.... don't even try to pass it off that you ARE in fact are property hydrated because he will know.
he includes pics of himself, so you can see what YOU get if you meet his list lengthy requirements.
well ladies? anyone interested??? 
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Peamac
Pearl Clutcher
Refupea # 418
Posts: 4,229
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Post by Peamac on May 28, 2015 16:52:00 GMT
He certainly knows what he wants! I didn't even read the ad, I just looked at all the pictures he posted.
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grinningcat
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,663
Jun 26, 2014 13:06:35 GMT
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Post by grinningcat on May 28, 2015 16:52:25 GMT
Hahahahahaha! He's a weiner who apparently missed that spell check is your friend. But it made for a good laugh!
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Post by greenlegume on May 28, 2015 16:54:10 GMT
he looks like a serial killer. That's the nicest thing I can say.
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lesley
Drama Llama
My best friend Turriff, desperately missed.
Posts: 7,295
Location: Scotland, Scotland, Scotland
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Post by lesley on May 28, 2015 16:55:00 GMT
Well, what can I say? "You don't dress like a hippie, wear hippie sandals or sock with sandals.
Dark circles under your eyes, dehydrated face, caffeine addicted, alcoholic, drug addiction, dreadlocks, stretched ears, big masculine bodybuilder abs, big masculine legs, do crossfire, thin balding hair, dress like old grandmother, hipster, listen to indie music, freaky large moles on your face/body, low self esteem, average, overweight, look like nerd, plain jane, hippie, short hair, tomboy and feminist.
Flip-flops are for the beach, not the city and bad for your feet. Your dirty and dry black feet are grossing me out. I don't understand how people go through life not talking care of their body.
Face tattoos, neck tattoo, chest tattoos, full sleeve tattoos, finger tattoos, hand tattoos, leg tattoos and feet tattoos, please pass my profile. I don't mind few tattoos or pricing on women, but full body tattoos don't turn me on." I am all of these things, this is me to a T! I wouldn't suit him at all. What a shame...  And WTF is pricing on women? |
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grinningcat
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,663
Jun 26, 2014 13:06:35 GMT
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Post by grinningcat on May 28, 2015 16:55:56 GMT
I'm amused that under interests he lists kale chips... are they really that interesting that they are worthy of being an interest in a profile?
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rickmer
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,137
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Post by rickmer on May 28, 2015 16:56:59 GMT
he has "spent months" working on that profile people!
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stittsygirl
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,600
Location: In the leaves and rain.
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Post by stittsygirl on May 28, 2015 16:58:41 GMT
Oh my, he doesn't think too highly of himself, does he  . I'm glad he doesn't judge people on their grammar, 'cause... yeah. Apparently smelly "verginas" are out too. And he spent months working on this masterpiece? |
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 21:23:12 GMT
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Post by Deleted on May 28, 2015 16:58:59 GMT
He is gay.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 21:23:12 GMT
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Post by Deleted on May 28, 2015 16:59:01 GMT
It's funny that he thinks he's open minded and non-conformist, yet only wants an empty-headed woman to serve his every need, and she needs to have a perfect, idealized body type...
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peabay
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,891
Jun 25, 2014 19:50:41 GMT
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Post by peabay on May 28, 2015 16:59:33 GMT
Could he just learn to spell?
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oldcrow
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,828
Location: Ontario,Canada
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Post by oldcrow on May 28, 2015 17:02:45 GMT
OMG!- right you are.
Too bad I am way over his age requirement, I'm I must fit all his requirements - NOT.
I live in a small rural town, am old so obviously I am out of the loop so could someone please enlighten me as to what 'metrosexual' means.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 21:23:12 GMT
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Post by Deleted on May 28, 2015 17:02:48 GMT
I don't imagine he's actually been near enough a real 'vergina' to know what one smells like. What a douche.
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NoWomanNoCry
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,856
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Post by NoWomanNoCry on May 28, 2015 17:04:46 GMT
He lost me at no flip flops. I love my flip flops!
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valincal
Drama Llama
Southern Alberta
Posts: 5,768
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Post by valincal on May 28, 2015 17:05:37 GMT
Can't believe I read the whole thing.  He's a handyman without a car? How did he get that jackhammer to the job site? |
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keithurbanlovinpea
Pearl Clutcher
Flowing with the go...
Posts: 4,302
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Post by keithurbanlovinpea on May 28, 2015 17:05:53 GMT
I am guessing that he will be looking for a long, long time. Too bad, because I am sure there is someone out there who wants to share his "aura."
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rickmer
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,137
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Post by rickmer on May 28, 2015 17:09:05 GMT
From Wikipedia:
is a portmanteau, derived from metropolitan and heterosexual, coined in 1994 describing a man (especially one living in an urban, post-industrial, capitalist culture) who is especially meticulous about his grooming and appearance, typically spending a significant amount of time and money on shopping as part of this.[1] The neologistic term is popularly thought to describe heterosexual men who adopt fashions and lifestyles stereotypically associated with homosexual men, although, by the definition given by the origin of the term, a metrosexual might be heterosexual, homosexual or bisexual.
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on May 28, 2015 17:11:33 GMT
I'd rather take a vow of celibacy.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 21:23:12 GMT
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Post by Deleted on May 28, 2015 17:17:24 GMT
at least he has a hydrated face! WTH does that even mean...LOL.
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Post by scrapqueen01 on May 28, 2015 17:19:40 GMT
If he was the last man on earth the human race would have to die out.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 21:23:12 GMT
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Post by Deleted on May 28, 2015 17:19:58 GMT
at least he has a hydrated face! WTH does that even mean...LOL. I imagine lots of women have thrown water on him... |
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georgiapea
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,846
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Post by georgiapea on May 28, 2015 17:20:17 GMT
The photos of him were more frightening than the written profile.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on May 28, 2015 17:23:46 GMT
So, he wants a "perfect" woman that conforms to his every wish and dream, but he is a self employed handyman (read: no real job, most likely); and he doesn't own a car or drive (read: you can just forget about him driving you on any dates.
Wow, he sounds like a super douche.
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Post by shannoots on May 28, 2015 17:24:10 GMT
And he wonders why he's still single?! I'm quite sure there is not a woman out there that fits that (lengthy) description.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on May 28, 2015 17:27:49 GMT
at least he has a hydrated face! WTH does that even mean...LOL. I imagine lots of women have thrown water on him... I LOLed!  |
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freebird
Drama Llama
'cause I'm free as a bird now
Posts: 6,927
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Post by freebird on May 28, 2015 17:28:48 GMT
at least he has a hydrated face! WTH does that even mean...LOL. I imagine lots of women have thrown water on him... priests. I think you meant Priests have thrown water on him. |
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rickmer
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,137
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Post by rickmer on May 28, 2015 17:29:50 GMT
wish i could reply and say "i was shocked while reading your post as it describes me to a T and you are EXACTLY what I am looking for. would you be willing to be circumcized as that is only thing that you missing have from my own very detailed list. and well, that's a dealbreaker, i am sure you understand, your current uncut status is repulsive. let me know....".
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Post by Regina Phalange on May 28, 2015 17:30:27 GMT
Surrrreee...no anger there at all...and he's SUPER laid back!!
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Post by gar on May 28, 2015 17:32:24 GMT
As you can see from my postcount I'm not very often speechless......but I'll make an exception this time....  |
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Post by sues on May 28, 2015 17:33:50 GMT
OMG- he spent months on that mess?
And sorry- he's fifty years old and he's getting his first suit this year? In fifty years he's never needed a suit? This urban, intelligent, cultured guy?
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