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Post by iamkristinl16 on Jun 7, 2015 3:05:38 GMT
My 12 year old son is on a travelling baseball team for our town. Last weekend they earned an invitation to a Tournament of Champions by winning a different tournament. This weekend we had a tournament in our town and they lost all of their games. One of the parents has approached the coaches (my DH is one of the coaches) and said that the team shouldn't go to the Tournament of Champions because they will just lose anyway. It is about 1 1/2-2 hrs away and would most likely require at least one night in a hotel and they don't think it would be worth the time and money to go.
I understand the financial part of it, but honestly, I am irritated that it was even brought up that the kids wouldn't play in the other tournament. They earned the spot, so now who is going to tell them that they aren't good enough so they might as well not even try? How would that affect their morale going forward, even in the regular season?
I am curious what the peas think about this situation and if anything similar has come up with any of your children's teams?
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Post by 1girlygirl on Jun 7, 2015 3:10:21 GMT
I've never been in that situation, and I think it's ridiculous that they wouldn't play in the tournament. What a terrible way to look at things - only take part if you are going to be the best/be successful. What message does that send these young people? That parent is wrong.
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gsquaredmom
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,078
Jun 26, 2014 17:43:22 GMT
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Post by gsquaredmom on Jun 7, 2015 3:11:07 GMT
The kids earned it. They should go.
If anything, this weekend's losses will fire them up!
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 19, 2024 14:41:17 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2015 3:20:24 GMT
Well, I'm the least competitive person in sports. I show up to have fun. If it's obvious one team is going to win, I say call it a game. If it's raining and blowing horribly, I say call the soccer game. Let's not use the "only lightning" rule. I see the other parent's point.
Then again, if it's teams they have never played or it isn't the same setup, they should give the tournament a try.
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Post by gmcwife1 on Jun 7, 2015 3:21:29 GMT
I think it's messed up to even suggest the kids not play in the tournament they earned a spot in
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Post by freecharlie on Jun 7, 2015 3:26:13 GMT
They earned it, they go.
What crap, if our high school didn't pkay because they would lose, our football team would never play.
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Post by leslie132 on Jun 7, 2015 3:32:39 GMT
I am an a travel team with my 10 year old son. Drove an hour away with twin 2 year old boys and watched a 12:00 and 4:30 game. We won one and lost another. Long day for all of us. And I'm driving back tomorrow for another day of it. If you want to pick where you play and have a say in tournament play then step up and be a couch. Otherwise pack yourself a bag and a chair and settle in for some ball. I think that is such a shitty attitude. Many great lessons can come off of a loss! Maybe someone needs to tell that to the parent! ETA...... You may want to be a coach. Not a couch! I'm so tired at this point! Maybe I should say we won't win tomorrow. Let's stay home...... NEVER would this baseball mama say that
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Post by iamkristinl16 on Jun 7, 2015 3:37:08 GMT
I am an a travel team with my 10 year old son. Drove an hour away with twin 2 year old boys and watched a 12:00 and 4:30 game. We won one and lost another. Long day for all of us. And I'm driving back tomorrow for another day of it. If you want to pick where you play and have a say in tournament play then step up and be a couch. Otherwise pack yourself a bag and a chair and settle in for some ball. I think that is such a shitty attitude. Many great lessons can come off of a loss! Maybe someone needs to tell that to the parent! It does make for a long day, doesn't it? My 10 year old had a tournament today as well so I took the 4 and 6 year old to his two games (an hour away) and then came home and watched two of the 12 year old's games. We go back tomorrow for at least one more game for the 10 year old. It's fun but tiring! Hopefully everyone on the 12 year old's team/parents will have better outlooks next week. My 10 year old lost both of his games as well but they played well and they left feeling good.
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scrapaddie
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,090
Jul 8, 2014 20:17:31 GMT
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Post by scrapaddie on Jun 7, 2015 3:39:07 GMT
The kids were invited, and they are entitled to go. If this parent wants to make decisions, then let him step up and be a coach !!
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Post by freecharlie on Jun 7, 2015 3:40:27 GMT
The kids were invited, and they are entitled to go. If this parent wants to make decisions, then let him step up and be a coach !! not directed at you, but hell no. A parent with that attitude should not be a coach.
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scrapaddie
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,090
Jul 8, 2014 20:17:31 GMT
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Post by scrapaddie on Jun 7, 2015 3:41:48 GMT
The kids were invited, and they are entitled to go. If this parent wants to make decisions, then let him step up and be a coach !! not directed at you, but hell no. A parent with that attitude should not be a coach. Agreed. But I'm also kind of assuming that a parent like that would never step up to do it anyway. They are complainers and there are doers and that parent is a complainer.
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Post by freecharlie on Jun 7, 2015 3:43:32 GMT
not directed at you, but hell no. A parent with that attitude should not be a coach. Agreed. But I'm also kind of assuming that a parent like that would never step up to do it anyway. They are complainers and there are doers and that parent is a complainer. got it. We have lots if complainers
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Post by peasapie on Jun 7, 2015 3:47:27 GMT
It sounds like it's an honor to be in the tournament and I think the kids should be allowed to go, enjoy the honor, and do their best.
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Post by leslie132 on Jun 7, 2015 3:47:25 GMT
I would like to say that I would LOVE to coach. In my head I coach all day long. And I think I could have a great team. I just know my team would not have my son. He would high tail it out of there in embarrassment. But the coaches crack up as I hit him balls to catch! Being a girl stinks at time ?
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Post by 1girlygirl on Jun 7, 2015 4:19:50 GMT
Well, I'm the least competitive person in sports. I show up to have fun. If it's obvious one team is going to win, I say call it a game. If it's raining and blowing horribly, I say call the soccer game. Let's not use the "only lightning" rule. I see the other parent's point. Then again, if it's teams they have never played or it isn't the same setup, they should give the tournament a try. Um, yeah. This isn't the Y or the school playground. This is a tournament travel team, and all the parents knew that when their kids tried out. These kids earned their way in to the tournament, and a couple of losses doesn't change that fact. There is an opportunity to learn equally in winning and losing.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 19, 2024 14:41:17 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2015 4:39:20 GMT
Well, I'm the least competitive person in sports. I show up to have fun. If it's obvious one team is going to win, I say call it a game. If it's raining and blowing horribly, I say call the soccer game. Let's not use the "only lightning" rule. I see the other parent's point. Then again, if it's teams they have never played or it isn't the same setup, they should give the tournament a try. Um, yeah. This isn't the Y or the school playground. This is a tournament travel team, and all the parents knew that when their kids tried out. These kids earned their way in to the tournament, and a couple of losses doesn't change that fact. There is an opportunity to learn equally in winning and losing. Um, yeah. No shit. That's why I said they should go.
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Post by 1girlygirl on Jun 7, 2015 4:56:10 GMT
Um, yeah. This isn't the Y or the school playground. This is a tournament travel team, and all the parents knew that when their kids tried out. These kids earned their way in to the tournament, and a couple of losses doesn't change that fact. There is an opportunity to learn equally in winning and losing. Um, yeah. No shit. That's why I said they should go. No, you said, if it was teams they hadn't played or the set up was different, then they should give it a try.
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Post by Baseballmom23 on Jun 7, 2015 5:12:00 GMT
Been there, done that. Suck it up princess mommy, it's not about you. The boys earned it, they should go. You never know what will happen. When you chose to be on a travel team, you SHOULD know that there is a financial investment. Enjoy the time with your son. We have wonderful memories of the places we travelled to. And yes we dragged along his little brother.
My son just finished playing college baseball and I loved every minute of his journey from T-Ball through college. every win, loss and rain out. I would do it all over again in a heartbeat.
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Post by Basket1lady on Jun 7, 2015 5:34:12 GMT
Definitely go to the tournament. The experience is good and they will all learn something. And you never know what can happen.
For example, our HS football team was ok. Not fabulous, but pretty good. The last game of the season was against a HS that hadn't won a game all season. Sure, we have this game in the bag, right? Not. The other team had a great night and ended up beating our team and knocking us out of the playoffs. Oour team was cocky and already looking past the current game and into the playoffs. It made DS mad, but it was a great lesson.
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anniebygaslight
Drama Llama
I'd love a cup of tea. #1966
Posts: 7,394
Location: Third Rock from the sun.
Jun 28, 2014 14:08:19 GMT
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Post by anniebygaslight on Jun 7, 2015 5:39:09 GMT
They should go. If that particular parent thinks that sheltering his kid from a potential disappointment is a good idea, then he is doing him/her no favours. If every team dodged games that they were likely to lose, then there would be no future for sport.
Win or lose, they will have a great time.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 19, 2024 14:41:17 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2015 5:42:42 GMT
Do people not think before they open their mouths? That parent sounds like an a$$hole and while my exDH would not do anything about it, my dad would have raised holy hell!
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wellway
Prolific Pea
Posts: 8,770
Jun 25, 2014 20:50:09 GMT
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Post by wellway on Jun 7, 2015 6:25:30 GMT
The kids earned it. They should go. If anything, this weekend's losses will fire them up! I agree.
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Post by littlemama on Jun 7, 2015 11:24:44 GMT
Hopefully everyone on the 12 year old's team/parents will have better outlooks next week. My 10 year old lost both of his games as well but they played well and they left feeling good. Is it one parent or is it "everyone"? One parent doesn't get to make the decision and If in it odd that one parent would approach the coaches with that kind of attitude. Clearly someone isn't cut out for competitive sports. If it's "everyone" as you said in this post, then there is more going on here.
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Post by gritzi on Jun 7, 2015 12:51:32 GMT
One loss does not mean the team will lose future games. Good grief! Hopefully the coaches told that *supportive* parent that they always have the option to stay home & not let their child participate, although I feel badly for that player. As a parent I would be pissed if I thought another parent had dictated the tournament decision for the team.
The team wouldn't have been selected if they didn't qualify.
My son's soccer team (plays in 1st division) recently participated in a big state tournament. Unfortunately, they did not do well the first game. Why? I don't know, just one of those days when the boys weren't on their game. That was the first of 3 matches, but the loss determined they would not proceed to the championship weekend during Memorial Day. Should that one off game prevent them from future games / tournaments? Absolutely not! Kids aren't perfect, nor are adults. Every game might not be a win. Encourage, challenge, correct what went wrong, and let the kids have fun!
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Post by jenb72 on Jun 7, 2015 13:42:32 GMT
I'd say that parent has a really crappy attitude that is the complete opposite of the attitude the coaches are trying to instill in their child. Sports is all about "playing to the whistle". You don't give up because of a loss. You get back in there and try harder. You learn from the loss and get better.
It makes me wonder why that parent agreed to have their child on a competitive travel team as opposed to a rec team.
Jen
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cakediva
Drama Llama
Making the world a sweeter place one cake at a time!
Posts: 7,444
Location: Fergus, Ontario
Jun 26, 2014 11:53:40 GMT
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Post by cakediva on Jun 7, 2015 13:44:29 GMT
They earned their spot - they should go!!
My son plays rep basketball. At the first tournament this year, we played at the "A" level - and came home with gold. But we were beating teams by huge scores. So our coach upped us to the "AA" level. Our next tournament? The first at the AA level? We lost all our games. But were in good spirits. Come the Provincial finals? We came home with gold for our division.
Just because one tournament was a poor outcome, does not mean the next one will be. Who knows what teams you will be playing at that tournament!
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Post by craftsbycarolyn on Jun 7, 2015 13:48:58 GMT
I hate parents that don't want to be involved with their kids or they are ready for the season to end. Or the kids can be involved if someone else takes them. Cripes sake, it's your kid, don't you want them to be everything they can be. If you don't want to be involved in your child's life, don't have kids!!!
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cycworker
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,375
Jun 26, 2014 0:42:38 GMT
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Post by cycworker on Jun 7, 2015 13:53:26 GMT
They should go
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Post by Skellinton on Jun 7, 2015 13:55:21 GMT
Along with what everyone else said about going regardless of potential outcome, your team not going will effect another team, correct? There must be a team that is supposed to play your team and if your team doesn't show up it will effect them too. That parent has a lousy attitude and probably shouldn't have signed her kid up for a traveling team.
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Nicole in TX
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,951
Jun 26, 2014 2:00:21 GMT
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Post by Nicole in TX on Jun 7, 2015 14:05:06 GMT
Maybe that (these) parent(s) should reconsider signing up their child(ren) for sports.
That is what you do in sports. You play a game. Somebody wins and somebody loses.
There is so much more to be gained from playing a sport than winning. There is discipline, humility, good sportsmanship, teamwork.....
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