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Post by shanniebananie on Oct 27, 2015 18:06:14 GMT
We have a 16 1/2 yr old chocolate lab. She is still eating 2 cans of food a day and a bowl of dry food but has lost 25 pounds in the last 3 yrs. She is about 50lbs now and getting so thin! She sleeps a lot of the day when it just the 2 of us but still comes out in the afternoon and evening to see the kids (kids=food!). She has been deaf for years and I think her eye sight is really poor now (still gets around fine though). Still walks, but is very slow. Still can get up from lying down but is very slow. Pooping in the house is getting more frequent, but never pees. The most annoying thing is she roams the house most of the night click clacking on the wood floors and I get up with her frequently because I never now if she has to go out - she does 50% of the time. As a result, I am terribly sleep deprived and it is really affecting me. We have tried benedryl, melatonin, and a pain med that should cause drowsiness but no change at all.
So, although some of this is a nuisance, I don't think it is time to put her down, and neither does the vet. But how low does quality of life have to get before it just gets to be cruel? I have looked on the internet for advice and it is all over the place. Something that stood out was it is okay to be a week early than a day too late with your decision.
So, when you had to put an elderly dog down, did you wait for it to stop eating and/or lose control of legs, bowels, etc or what? It is such a gray area right now. I don't think she is super happy, but she hasn't us told it is "time" yet. In the meantime, we are just loving her and kissing her and being thankful for every day. She has out lived her entire litter by a year and half now.
If you have been in a similar situation and can offer advice, I would appreciate it. We love her dearly and hate to see her go, but we don't want to drag out the inevitable longer than we need to.
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Post by kristi521 on Oct 27, 2015 18:21:07 GMT
My heart is breaking for you. We had to make that decision about our chocolate lab July 2014. He was 11-12 at the time. He too had lost a lot of weight - 20 lbs over 3 months. For us it was that he had stopped eating and wouldn't ever miss a meal before. A week or so before that he had started going to the bathroom in the house and that hadn't happened since a week after we got him. He had a really hard time with stairs, but would go up them because he followed me. When I took him into the vet, he got out of the minivan and into the office by himself, but he couldn't get up when the tech came out to get us and take us back to the room. He had to be carried in on a stretcher  The vet wouldn't guide us either way with the decision, or at least not directly. She did say she didn't think we were making a bad decision. I don't have any answers for you, but I wanted to share with you the signs we had when we made the decision. Big hugs to you and your family, it certainly isn't an easy decision to make. |
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Post by papersilly on Oct 27, 2015 18:29:24 GMT
I'm sorry about your little baby. it's never an easy decision and I suspect, in hindsight, people will say they are sorry they waited longer than they should have. I think it's because we are never ready to do it and we hope one more day will help us cope with the inevitable decision.
we did not wait until our dog could not eat anymore or lose control of bowels or legs. I think we may have waited longer than we should but DH just wasn't ready. but he was never going to be ready and I had to make the decision for the sake of our dog. to keep him longer was just US being selfish. at that point his spirit and joy were gone. he wasn't playing anymore. he was just passing time and not enjoying life. that was no way to live. he wasn't in severe pain but he certainly had issues that would result in severe pain, distress and discomfort soon enough. the day we did it, he walked in there on his own 4 legs. I don't know how to describe it but there seemed to be some dignity in being able to go out like that. since then, I promised myself I will never wait that long again. it simply isn't worth keeping our dog alive because of OUR inability to let go. as the "parents", it's our duty to do the right thing, sooner than later.
you will know when the time is right for your dog. trust your instincts and compassion.
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Post by snappinsami on Oct 27, 2015 18:30:09 GMT
That is the hardest decision I've ever had to make. Our first Lab developed the canine version of MS when he was around 13 years old. Over the next 2 1/2 years, he slowly declined. It got harder and harder for him to lie down and get up (although once he was up, he could move around pretty well), and he slowly became incontinent. Looking back, we should have let him go about a year earlier than we did, but we held on to him because he just didn't seem THAT bad. His appetite never declined (he was a Lab, after all!). In the end, we realized that his illness was affecting not only his quality of life but ours. We'd moved into a new house with beautiful hardwood floors and new rugs, and couldn't leave him unattended because of the incontinence issues. So he spent a lot of time alone in the basement, and that just wasn't fair to him.
Our second Lab was just 8 when we had to put her down due to anal sac cancer. Her case was easier in some ways, because one day she was pretty good, and the next she just flat out refused to eat anything (even oatmeal, bananas, yogurt - the things she'd NEVER turned down before). It was as if she had decided it was time.
The things you've listed are mostly just inconveniences, true. Keep an eye on her, and keep in touch with your vet. If her appetite changes, that's definitely a red flag. If her problems cause you to have to drastically change her life, that would affect her quality of life, and could be a sign that it's time. Big (((HUGS))) to you. As I said, this is the hardest decision that we've had to make.
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Post by mnmloveli on Oct 27, 2015 18:37:48 GMT
So sorry for you to be in this awful situation. This is a very personal decision for each family. For my family, we always felt as long as they were eating/drinking and could get themselves outside for the bathroom, then that was still having a decent quality of life. We wouldn't even mind some accidents in the house. If any of those things stopped (eating & drinking OR being able to walk on their own) then we would have to make that decision that it was time. I have very close friends that carried their dog outside for close to a year before she passed naturally. It was horrible to watch. There is no "right" decision; just what feels the best for your family.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Oct 27, 2015 18:46:51 GMT
(Hugs!!) We're on the fence with two of ours right now too so I know how hard the decision is. We recently changed vets to one closer to our house, and her advice was to write down the top ten things the dog loved most when it was in the prime of life (playing with favorite toys, getting treats, going for walks, whatever) and start crossing off the things the dog can no longer do or enjoy. If it's only one or two things getting crossed off he or she is still probably pretty happy. But once you're crossing off five, six, seven things, it might just be time. Only you can be the judge, you know your pet best.
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MerryMom
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Post by MerryMom on Oct 27, 2015 19:12:57 GMT
Two weeks ago, we had to put down our lab/boxer mix. We were going to do a week later, but once we made the decision and scheduled the appointment, the next day, our dog couldn't even get up and she would try and try and then she would poop while laying down, but trying to get up. She looked like her "spirit" was breaking and if a dog can look embarrassed, she looked embarrassed. After puppy training, she NEVER pooped or peed in the house.
Anyways, we called our vet that day and he came out to our house that evening and she was put down.
Initially, our decision was based on her general decline and although she has limped for several years, it got so bad the last week that she kept slipping on the garage floor or in the driveway. She also started to poop in the house, like she felt she needed to go, got up and headed to the door, but then she pooped, could wait even a minute to get outside. There is no way she could have gotten through an Ohio winter.
She is one the best dogs I have ever had: so sweet, but for some reason, she always growled at the vet. When he went to give her "the shot", she growled at him. I started to laugh and I said, "You can take the dog out of the fight, but not the fight out of the dog."
RIP Emma, age 15 years. SWEETEST DOG EVER!!!!
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calgal08
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Jun 27, 2014 15:43:46 GMT
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Post by calgal08 on Oct 27, 2015 19:42:59 GMT
Our old boy who we lost 3 years ago roamed the house all night long too. Turns out, he had doggie dementia. There's over the counter supplements you can buy (we bought them from Amazon), that worked like a charm.
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Post by zztop11 on Oct 27, 2015 20:36:53 GMT
Don't know the answer to that one. But we just put our sweet Lola (cat) to sleep today. I am so drained. She was sick but it was hard to make the decision. I think in some ways, making the decision is worse than the putting to sleep. Your dog seems to have quality of life left. So that is good. Can you use ear plugs so that you get some sleep. If your health is suffering, then that is a sign that it might be time. One thing I learned is that it's not always going to be BAM- smack in your face, this is what we need to do. It isn't always like there is a definite right or wrong answer. If you can't sleep and that is having an effect on your life, then to me that is also a big sign.
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River
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Jun 26, 2014 15:26:04 GMT
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Post by River on Oct 27, 2015 20:49:28 GMT
It's a very personal decision and no one can tell you when the right time is.
For my family, that time was when our sweet basset hound could no longer get around good on his own. It was the day he could no longer make it down the steps to go potty.
(HUGS) as you travel this road with your sweet lab!
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Post by melanell on Oct 27, 2015 21:49:23 GMT
I think it different for every dog and every dog owner. My mom just had to put a dog down, but her dog was in constant pain, so the choice, while not an easy one to make, at least felt very obvious to her as the right choice, kwim? Plus, in this case, the vet said that if it was her dog, now would be the time she would make that choice as well.
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Deleted
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May 19, 2024 13:48:08 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Oct 27, 2015 22:11:27 GMT
Oh my. I have no advice but wanted to say good luck to you and I hope you find peace in your decision. Hugs to you and your sweet pup.
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blue tulip
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Post by blue tulip on Oct 27, 2015 22:33:23 GMT
I think it different for every dog and every dog owner. My mom just had to put a dog down, but her dog was in constant pain, so the choice, while not an easy one to make, at least felt very obvious to her as the right choice, kwim? Plus, in this case, the vet said that if it was her dog, now would be the time she would make that choice as well. I love these types of vets, rather than the ones who won't say anything either way like a previous poster's doc. when we had to put our dog down, it meant a lot to me that our vet commiserated with us and said we were doing the right thing. if she has said "well, I don't think you're making a bad decision" that would've hurt me, even tho it really means the same thing I guess. |
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Post by ametallichick on Oct 27, 2015 22:42:09 GMT
I just put my 19 yo cat to sleep last month.
She had lost over 3 pounds in two months. Very frail.
But she was eating and drinking and still affectionate when we would pet her.
I took her to the vet on Sept 25 and I was going back and forth with him.
I told him that she peed on my dogs bed that day and he asked me about her quality of life and a light bulb went off in my head.
She didn't have one. She used to sun herself when the sun came in the sliding glass door but I hadn't seen her do that in a long time.
I have gone back and forth with guilt. My rational mind says it was time but my un-rational mind says I should've waited.
I say go with your heart. If he/she is not in pain, has quality of life maybe you should wait until he/she lets you know it's time.
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Post by stampinbetsy on Oct 28, 2015 4:03:54 GMT
I thought I responded to this earlier, but I guess I never actually hit post! I put my 14 1/2 year old lab down about 3 years ago. He had arthritis, and had been doing ok for an old lab with arthritis. He went from ok for him to not being able to get up within about 3 days. I knew it was time. He couldn't get around anymore, and he was miserable. It was really hard - I got him when I was pregnant with DS. But I knew it was kinder to him. Good luck - it isn't ever easy. |
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raindancer
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Post by raindancer on Oct 28, 2015 4:06:54 GMT
It is such a hard decision. Our old girl was much like your sweet dog, we knew it was time when she stopped eating and wouldn't wag her tail. Our old cat we put down when he was in such pain and in kidney failure that we could tell he was just ready. I'm sorry. It's really hard. |
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Post by trixiecat on Oct 28, 2015 10:22:48 GMT
You will know…you truly will. It sounds like she is fine now, outside the pooping. When it comes to the point her body starts really failing her, you will know.
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Post by christine58 on Oct 28, 2015 10:29:16 GMT
My yellow lab was 15...she began wandering all the time...at night in the house, during the day when she was outside. She never ever went in the road (I live in the country) and when she started to do that and wouldn't respond when I called her---I knew it was time. I didn't want someone to hit her with their car etc. (she spent 90% of her time in the house or on my gated deck). She also started peeing and pooping in the house. It was a sad sad day but I knew it was time.
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Post by peasapie on Oct 28, 2015 11:45:33 GMT
Im sorry. It's so hard to see a good friend failing.
We had a cat who lived to be 20. He had been my dads, and when dad passed we adopted him. I never expected him to live as long as he did, and along the way he developed arthritis and couldn't use the litter box, so we built him a ramp to get in it and covered it so his pee wouldn't go all over. He ate a lot because I think their bodies need extra food to get the nutrients out of it. And he cried during the night when we went to bed because--well I think he was sort of confused and lonely. So I spent my nights rocking him like a baby. Like you, I wondered how we would know when was the time.
In our boy's case, he started to become dehydrated. He would spend a lot of time hanging out with his head over the water dish, falling asleep there. (I occasionally found him asleep with his head IN the water bowl.) That was when I knew his old body couldn't support his little soul. The vet was wonderful when the time came, offered to come to our home to help him make his final journey.
You sound very sensitive to your girl's needs. You will see one day that the bad moments far outweigh the good and you will know. Big hugs to you.
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Post by BuckeyeSandy on Oct 29, 2015 2:36:42 GMT
Princess will be 14 years old in 28 days. She can no longer play frisbee or ball, cannot do stairs and cannot jump on her own onto the bed or on the couch. She is still very alert, when she is awake, but sleeps much of the time. We are doing hospice care and keeping her comfortable. She has gotten very finicky about her food. It really is just a matter of time. She has lost over 10 pounds in a year. The quality of life list is up, and so far still more checks. But we are aware that can change at any point.
Chance's decline in 2011 was more pronounced. He had DM and the canine version of Alzheimer's. Looking back, maybe we kept him too long, but the day he refused to eat anything, no even treats, we knew to schedule that last appointment. He then improves and we wonder if we were making the right decision and then he had a bad fall and started crying. It was time.
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The vet wouldn't guide us either way with the decision, or at least not directly. She did say she didn't think we were making a bad decision. 
