The bad side to dirty santa....

We don't call it dirty Santa, but we play similar. We usually do something "nice" but under $5 per person. We also try to make some kid friendly things so we can all play together. When DS was 2 years old, he "got" a box of HoHo's. He was so excited. My Grandma's asshat of a husband stole them from my DS. Poor little guy didn't understand the concept of the game and no one else had planned to steal from a baby. 13 years later and it still ticks me off... jerk!

On a cute note though, when my great grandma was still alive (lived to almost 100), she won a box of chocolates. Someone wanted to steal it and she told them too bad, she wasn't giving it up. So cute!

years ago I was invited to a neighborhood cookie exchange that wasn't my neighborhood, but a good friend was hosting so she invited me as I knew a bunch of the people there..the exchange game was for ornaments. They were all so pretty! It was my turn and I went to "steal" one from someone I didn't know...and evidently she didn't get the game rules and she pitched a fit...I was embarrassed.. I learned a lesson there...don't steal from someone you don't know won't get into the spirit of the game.

We used to play this with my DH's father's family in East Texas...it was a lot of fun! Lots of lottery tickets, flashlights, picture frames, candles....that kind of thing. Not expensive. One year DH's uncle got stolen from almost every time he opened a gift....it was hilarious! But with this group, it was all in fun. And adults only. Kiddos got a toy to open brought by their parent. WE don't get together with any of them any more...It's a shame. I miss some of them.

Personally I HATE the game no matter what it is called. I have only played with groups of people that don't know each other well. Somebody always seemed hurt. Last year we played it as a family gift exchange with my husband's family. Honestly it was terrible. Again a group of people that we are honestly not close with and just a mess. All adults and one person bought a cotton candy maker from the toy department. I am not poor but not rich. We are not doing it this year. It would cost me over $200 to participate and I can not dump that kind of money on the chance I will get stuff that will go in the goodwill bag. I pay for my young adult children's exchange gifts. There is more to my rant but I will stop here. I have never enjoyed the game.

That sounds like a pretty sentimental gift for a dirty Santa game.

Oh we did this at work one year.. I bought something super funny (superhero snuggie.. Who wouldn't want that?) the guy who ended up with it pitched such a fit bc he brought a bottle of booze and apparently thought that's what he would get, I was horribly embarrassed and super pissed off... I ended up giving him my gift and taking mine back so he would shut up.. Never participated again, never will.

Gosh...hate to hear so many bad experiences with what should be a fun game.

However, I will share my very first experience with "dirty santa"....I had no idea how to play. I was part of a small church group and the girl who was hosting also invited a bunch of her hubby's work people which was not known to me before I got there. I asked what kind of gift... was "white elephant" and she said "something you received that you didn't want"....so ok. We (DH and me) thought that meant something funny. So we had an unopened nose hair clipper. We thought that would be funny...thinking all the gifts would be funny and crazy. Well....not so much. The woman who got that gift was standing next to my DH at one point and said "who would bring that?".....and my DH said "I have no idea...what a crazy gift!"....We laughed all the way home but were embarrassed at the same time...we had no idea what was expected!

I'm pretty glad I don't play that game anymore with people I don't know....

That does sound like a difficult family. My sister and I were just talking about what we had wanted to get for the exchange (bourbon crafted for her husband's company from her and vodka from a distillery I visited recently from me) but we wouldn't because we have 3 people in the exchange who are under 21, 2 more who have personal reasons for being anti-alcohol, and another 2 who just don't care for it. I can't imagine putting any of them in a position to get stuck with alcohol for their gift. That's just plain rude and inconsiderate.

I hate gift exchanges because i always get screwed and 9 times out of 10 the party is on my actual birthday and people still screw me over. I only participate because I want to keep everyone happy. This year I'm missing one due to illness and I'm not really sad.

I saw something similar to that mentioned on a site recently.   It was part of a party.  The hostess purchased enough gifts for everyone, but there was a twist.  Although the gifts were inexpensive and/or silly things, there were 3 "real" gifts hidden inside the silly gifts.   2 gift cards and a cash gift.  And the hostess would hide them so well that sometimes no one knew who had the "good" gift until it was all over.   But you could certainly host a party and play the game without the added special gifts.

Christmas Gift Game

But really, I think this game only ever works well if the people playing it are willing to have fun with it.    15 years ago we used to play this game with $1.00 gifts and we each brought 5 of them to the party.   It was crazy, and funny, and no one got too upset over losing a 1.00 gift or over spending 5.00 to play.  

Feel good that the painting was stolen so much. You're a talented artist.

I remember hanging on to a jar of Nutella for dear life for during a Dirty Santa game.

I can relate. We do this game each year with DH's family ($25-30 gift). We have many "rules" for the game and part of the fun each year is the reading of the rules by my SIL. One of the rules is "no crying at Christmas." From time to time, the game has turned a little sour. Last year we handed out playing cards after the game and two cards at a time were pulled and those two people exchanged their gifts. It felt a bit random.
I go into the evening with low expectations (which isn't too Christmasy) and try to remember it's a big family event and it's about all the laughing we do, not the gift.

I hate that game with the passion of 1000 fiery suns!!!!!! Several years ago, before Mr. Boss retired, we did that, and he bought...a stapler. It was a goofy thing he had bought at an art museum store. Of course, the gifts are anonymous, so no one knew it was his. People were trading that thing off, left and right. Mr. Boss got all butt-hurt that no one wanted his gift, and proclaimed no more gifts. And for the longest time we didn't until after he let.

Then there was the year that DH's mom's family decided to do it, and the two uncles kept arguing over what the rules are. And again, there was always someone who wasn't a great gift buyer who kept getting traded around, and one uncle was upset that someone stole his Home Depot gift card.

Now we do a small low-key Stocking Exchange at the office. The gifts are neutral, so even though there's a little whining, most of the gifts are about equal.