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Post by spitfiregirl on Dec 16, 2015 13:38:22 GMT
Just so im not alone, my brother hasnt spoken to me since MAY. Apparently he has issues with me. I tried reaching out several times, to no avail. I give up.. anyone else have a family member who wont be coming over for the holidays.... Join the club.
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Post by gar on Dec 16, 2015 13:40:33 GMT
One SIL doesn't speak to me/us and actually that's great. Dh hasn't spoken to her in years except at their father's funeral and life is better that way. She's very self centred and for years we've trodden on egg shells around her but now we don't need to bother. As far as Christmas goes she's always invited to the other SIL's home for a family Christmas (nice SIL keeps the lines of communication open for sons) with her boys but she never gives a yes or no answer until Christmas Eve...sometimes she doesn't reply at all and just pitches up on the day sort of unannounced  |
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Deleted
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May 12, 2024 3:41:14 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 16, 2015 13:41:24 GMT
My oldest sister and I don't speak. She's 13 years older than I am and moved far away when I was 5, so we never really got to know each other. And over the years there have been various incidents and hurt feelings on both sides, so now we just don't speak to each other unless there is some reason due to our mother. It makes me a little sad, but you can't really miss what you never had.
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Post by mikklynn on Dec 16, 2015 13:43:33 GMT
One of my sisters has really checked out of my life. I talk to her occasionally, mostly because we won't upset our mother. It is what it is.
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Post by bearmom on Dec 16, 2015 13:52:01 GMT
My aunt isn't speaking to me because after my grandma died there was fighting among the siblings regarding what to do with her house. My mom and aunt were on different sides and my aunt isn't speaking to my mom, therefore not me as well.
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Post by tiffanyannhulsey on Dec 16, 2015 14:50:25 GMT
Well, I haven't spoken to my mother in almost 8 years by my choice. She would have repaired it but it is toxic. (Long story!) As a result of this, my aunts and cousin don't speak to me. I'm fine with all of this! I have done a lot of healing and live a much more positive life as a result.
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Post by padresfan619 on Dec 16, 2015 14:52:14 GMT
My first cousin/godfather has been giving me radio silence for the last few months. I have no idea why or what I did but I don't get any response to emails. He lives across the country so I can't just pop on over to say hi.
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Post by mnmloveli on Dec 16, 2015 14:53:57 GMT
Me too. Sister & her 2 sons (my nephews). Been about 7 years since I talked to my oldest nephew, 2 years for the younger nephew and about 1 1/2 years since I last spoke to my sister. I've come to accept it. Always remember some people are not meant to be in your life forever and we sometimes have no choice in the matter. I treasure the memories we shared and have moved on and have an awesome life. No time to dwell in the past; life's too short.
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Deleted
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May 12, 2024 3:41:14 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 16, 2015 14:55:41 GMT
My oldest brother doesn't speak to me, he's a douche who threatened to kill me so I waste zero time worrying about it. There will be no reaching out on my part.
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Post by Zee on Dec 16, 2015 14:57:37 GMT
One of my cousins stopped speaking to me, and although I discovered the misunderstanding and could have fixed it, I decided I really didn't care. She's always mad about something.
It's been two and a half years now and she finally has been able to bring herself to re-friend me on fb, which I most graciously accepted, lol
But in general my family gets along really well on both sides. It's a large family. Maybe that helps.
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Post by salem on Dec 16, 2015 15:05:11 GMT
My younger sister is a great big pain in the ass. Haven't talked to her in months after she tried to take over a health emergency with our Dad. She made inappropriate comments and it was all I had not to punch her in the face. We need some space. She will never change.
My DH will not speak to any of his siblings after seeing the gigantic assholes they all turned into during the probate process of his Parents' estate. Basically they gave him nothing but grief and held their hands out for their share including more than one of them calling to scream at him late at night while totally drunk about why everything was taking so long and who the hell was he to drag out the process. Um, he was the executor and the courts only move so fast. Rotten bastards can all go screw.
Luckily we have normal peaceful family members too. Lol
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Post by femalebusiness on Dec 16, 2015 15:09:11 GMT
Nobody that doesn't speak to me but there are several family members that I no longer speak to or have anything to do with.
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freebird
Drama Llama
'cause I'm free as a bird now
Posts: 6,927 
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Post by freebird on Dec 16, 2015 15:15:32 GMT
My older sister is off and on with the whole family for a couple years at a time. I saw her at my uncle's funeral last spring and she seemed fine then but she doesn't come around, won't answer the phone, texts a bit with me but often won't even answer if you ask a question (so everyone quit trying). Of all of us, she probably had the worst childhood so I get where some of it's coming from, but we haven't treated her badly now (there's not incident in particular I know of within the past couple years anyway). *shrug*
After a while, you really stop trying.
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Post by Minty118 on Dec 16, 2015 15:15:53 GMT
My brother hasn't spoken to me, my mom or my dad in over two years. He got a new girlfriend, and after she met each of us, my brother abruptly stopped talking to us. He moved in with her, changed his job and phone number. He's made it impossible to find him since everything is in her name, and we don't know her last name. I am seriously pissed at him and doubt that I would welcome him back easily. My mother on the other hand would be thrilled that her favorite child is back and wouldn't bat an eye at how he ignored her for so long.  |
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Post by SnowWhite on Dec 16, 2015 15:16:32 GMT
Well, I haven't spoken to my mother in almost 8 years by my choice. She would have repaired it but it is toxic. (Long story!) This is the bench I'm sitting on. I have no relationship with my mother. I've tolerated her at family functions for the sake of my sister. But the shit she pulled when my sister died assured me that she is not worth my time in any way and I'm not at all upset or sad about not having a relationship with her, ever. |
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Post by myboysnme on Dec 16, 2015 15:20:10 GMT
My sister has not spoken to me nor me to her in about 3 or 4 years. She also stopped speaking to our mom because my mom speaks to me, and she cut off her kids from my mom (though they are adults now.).
I am actually the one that told my sister I am dead to her after she treated me like absolute shit for the trillionth time.
I do not miss her at all, but my mom does. At Christmas time I give some thought to sending her a card but then the feeling passes.
This morning I was thinking about when my mom passes away will she come and get any of my mom's stuff. I will notify her but I imagine she will decline.
I always imagine that my sister went to therapy and her therapist told her to cut off her family since they made her so miserable. |
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Post by crazy4scraps on Dec 16, 2015 15:28:22 GMT
Nobody that doesn't speak to me but there are several family members that I no longer speak to or have anything to do with. This is where I am too. I'm the one choosing not to talk to my oldest brother (he is dead to me) or my oldest sister who completely bungled our mom's estate and basically called me a liar and a thief (of which I am neither), and then pretended that nothing happened. Yeah, NO. So I'm just done with both of them. It might get a little weird for her going to her in-laws and seeing a Christmas card from us on their mantel when I didn't send one to her, but oh well! |
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Post by Deleted on Dec 16, 2015 15:37:37 GMT
You are so not alone. My brother who I basically raised and lived me with for 10 years as an adult. Got married to a toxic woman and stopped speaking to us. My husband's family we don't speak to at all after his parents passed...and my second oldest son...well he chooses to believe my ex-asshat and hasn't spoken to us in 8 years!
Honestly, I don't dwell on it and choose to put my energy into my other three children and my friends who choose to spend time with me!
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Deleted
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May 12, 2024 3:41:14 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 16, 2015 15:39:28 GMT
Father- never met
Mother- not for around 17-18 years
Brother- same as mother (but we have talked in the past few years)
Half Sister, her husband never met, children never met- same as mother
Step Father- even longer than mother
Brother-in-law and his wife- around 4 or 5 years
The reasons range from horrific (for my family) to just stupid (with DH family) and I am totally glad, relieved, and better off not to deal with any of these people.
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Post by lbp on Dec 16, 2015 15:39:31 GMT
Dh's brother hasn't talked to us in 3 years. He could not handle the fact that his mother didn't recognize him the last time she saw him 3 years ago and he just dropped all contact with us and her. She asks about him every day. We think he is mad at DH because MIL put her house and land in DH's name over 10 years ago because she wanted it to stay in the family "in case something happened". And it did. She has vascular dementia and has ended up in a memory care facility. DH was going to split house and land with brother until he decided to drop out of the family. Too late now.
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Post by mom on Dec 16, 2015 15:51:54 GMT
Let's see -
my middle sister was a prescription drug addict and we have just now started talking (bare minimal) - but it has been 8 years since I stepped away from a relationship with her because of her addiction.
my mother in law was pissed at Thanksgiving and refused to come celebrate with the family because we didn't come see her in the hospital (hubs and I were out of town the entire time). No clue if she is over it or not - she is always upset about something.
my dads wife - I only deal with her when ABSOLUTELY necessary. Her and my dad 'forgot' that they said they would be over for Thanksgiving desserts and basically stood us up with no call, text. StepMommy is really selfish and demanding and if it isn't about her all the time, then she makes it about her.
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Post by tiffanyannhulsey on Dec 16, 2015 16:40:16 GMT
I  love this thread. I makes me feel more normal! |
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Post by barbarac on Dec 16, 2015 16:49:13 GMT
My SIL hasn't spoken to me in several years. She is married to DH's brother and we are the godparents to their twins. I had made a mistake (not a major one though) and apologized and tried to fix it but she wasn't interested. It used to really, really bother me but I'm (almost...) totally over it now. We still send cards and invite them to every family gathering. Now BIL and the kids come over and she stays home. They used to say she wasn't feeling well but no one even bothers with excuses anymore. BIL and the kids actually came over on Easter and she stayed home alone! So at this point the only one that's suffering is her. It's sad really.
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Post by moveablefeast on Dec 16, 2015 16:50:02 GMT
I didn't let my then 22yo niece get away with being shitty to my then 6yo daughter so we haven't talked in a year. When your normally pretty thick skinned kid comes to you crying wanting to know what she did to make her cousin not like her anymore, you don't let that slide.
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Post by mymindseyedpea on Dec 16, 2015 16:51:27 GMT
The easier question for me would be who am I still speaking too. I never see my mom or dad's side of the family anymore. I've made up with my aunt after about 14 + years and we just talk on fb from time to time.
I haven't seen my dad for just as long and he needs to be the one to make up, which may never happen as long as he sticks to his Narcisstic ways.
Haven't seen my other aunts in 3 years. I wouldn't say we are on bad terms but the energy is always awkward between us.
And my cousins have grown up and been involved with their own lives.
My mom is really the only person I still interact with on phone and person.
My immediate family I see on a daily basis since I live with them.
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Post by Pahina722 on Dec 16, 2015 17:07:46 GMT
Like moveablefeast, I stopped all contact with my adult nephew 6 or 7 years ago when he robbed my 11-year-old son while supposedly house-sitting for us. He's a junkie, alcoholic, multiple times incarcerated and rehabbed guy that I was trying to help out. No more. As a result, I see my brother (his father) only rarely and don't participate in family gatherings as my parents (whom nephew also robbed multiple times but they didn't bother to tell me that) refuse to keep him out of their house. |
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Post by lovinlife on Dec 16, 2015 17:10:40 GMT
My mil and fil are not talking to me and since they are mad at me they won't talk to my children (their grandkids). Also since inlaws mad at me my 2 bil are not talking with us as well. to be honest I am OK with it since now there is a lot less stress in my life with them gone. I don't need negative people in my life and my children have also washed their hands of them as well. No, I didn't say anything to my kids about our feud but they have seen for themselves what has happened and has been ignored by inlaws when they have tried reaching out to them. Life is short and I am not wasting more time with it.
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breetheflea
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,905
Location: PNW
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Post by breetheflea on Dec 16, 2015 17:14:33 GMT
I don't have any direct contact with my step-dad or my father.
My mom told me my step-dad hates me, so I will not go over there (they live 15 miles away) if I want to see my mom I have to visit her at work or she has to come over here (rare).
My dad I just got tired of putting an effort in with nothing in return. He is on Facebook (I have him at acquaintance level) and the gushing over how great he is with his fake grandkids (apparently he "adopted" some other woman and her daughter) when he hasn't seen my kids in 4 years makes me mad. I'm not not speaking to him, but I'm not going out of my way to keep in touch either.
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casii
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,464
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Post by casii on Dec 16, 2015 17:18:29 GMT
Good gravy, my youngest sister, who is the darling of my parents. Every single birthday and holiday, my parents remind my other sister and I to send gifts. We only hear from this sister a few weeks before her birthday and before Christmas. Do we ever get anything in return? No. We're not torn up about it, but we get tired of the special attention paid to the youngest, so this year other sis and I decided not to exchange any gifts with each other for any event because we don't need more 'stuff'. She has decided I'm the one who instigated the plan to cut back on the presents due her, so she's not talking to me for that reason among a couple of others:
~Last year she told our mom 2 weeks before my sons wedding to tell me that she and hubby weren't coming. This really upset my son and his sisters for various reasons, but enough so that when my daughter was getting married this year, she didn't invite her aunt, my youngest sister. She never has sent a birthday card, graduation card, anything card to my children, but gave us a lecture on how family comes first when she realized she wasn't getting a wedding invitation. So we could yet again pay the caterer for 2 extra no show meals at the last minute?
~Several years ago, she met a guy online who told her he was going to be the new lead guitarist for Sister Hazel. That the original guitarist died. That they were getting ready to send a private jet to fly the band to HI for a commercial. Simple Googling debunked that, but she called me garbage and eloped with him anyway. He died of a drug overdose in the guest room of my parents house a couple of years later (they never moved out of my parents house after they eloped). So she doesn't talk to me because I wasn't supportive of her true love, but...
~Less than a year later, she remarried her first husband who she eloped with right after she graduated from high school.
I'm not terribly upset she's decided I'm not worth her time. LOL |
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Post by mrst on Dec 16, 2015 17:19:43 GMT
My only daughter hasn't spoken to me for 8 years and I've never met my gs. My bother won't speak for some reason and my stepson won't speak so we don't see dh gd. It's a s3 conditions marriage for both of us and we live abroad, so it's relatively easy to ignore most of the time.
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