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Post by bc2ca on Jan 5, 2016 20:39:59 GMT
We have a formal dinner/dance on Saturday night and the dress I planned to wear won't work (psoriasis flare on my knees), so I'm thinking of wearing pants. The Board members/spouses will be in tuxedos/floor length gowns and most other attendees in suits/cocktail dresses.
Would you pick dressy, evening appropriate pants & top or gown?
ETA Does it make a difference to your answer if I already have a pant/top outfit that I could wear (from a NYE party)?
Neither of us are Board members.
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BarbaraUK
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Surrounded by my yarn stash on the NE coast of England...............!! Refupea 1702
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Jun 27, 2014 12:47:11 GMT
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Post by BarbaraUK on Jan 5, 2016 20:42:25 GMT
There would be no problem wearing dressy evening appropriate pants and top to a formal occasion here.
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oldcrow
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Posts: 3,828 
Location: Ontario,Canada
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Post by oldcrow on Jan 5, 2016 20:42:36 GMT
Sounds like you should have opted for a gown in the first place.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 2, 2024 5:10:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jan 5, 2016 20:46:13 GMT
How about a tuxedo style suit with killer heels?
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Post by FLA SummerBaby on Jan 5, 2016 20:50:14 GMT
How about some flowy palazzo style pants with heels and a really fancy top?
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Post by jcmom04 on Jan 5, 2016 20:54:03 GMT
There are some beautiful (and affordable) floor length gowns available. I wish you luck!
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Post by jemali on Jan 5, 2016 20:58:59 GMT
Are you a board member/spouse or other attendee?
If you are a board member/spouse I would go with floor length gown, but if you are an attendee you could probably get away with fancy dress and top.
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Post by Darcy Collins on Jan 5, 2016 21:09:50 GMT
I'm guessing you're not a board member if the original dress doesn't cover your knees. I wouldn't hesitate to wear a dressy pant outfit in lieu of a cocktail dress.
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Post by bc2ca on Jan 5, 2016 21:09:55 GMT
Are you a board member/spouse or other attendee? If you are a board member/spouse I would go with floor length gown, but if you are an attendee you could probably get away with fancy dress and top. Other attendee - if DH was on the board I would be wearing floor length. I have always worn a cocktail dress to this event. I'm editing the OP to add that I wouldn't have to buy a pants/top outfit (could use something from a NYE party). |
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perumbula
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Posts: 3,439
Location: Idaho
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Post by perumbula on Jan 5, 2016 21:40:59 GMT
It depends on the pants. Are they made from really nice fabric and have a formal look? Formal wear pants exist. they are usually either loose and flowy or tuxedo pants style. Either look would be fine as long as the top is dressy enough. You'll see actresses over the age of 45 wear pants to award shows. If they can show up to the Oscars in pants, you can go to your party in them, too.  |
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Post by leannec on Jan 5, 2016 22:30:32 GMT
I think if you are tall you can get away with pants ... I'm short and I know that it would look horrible  |
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Post by Delta Dawn on Jan 5, 2016 23:21:51 GMT
How about some flowy palazzo style pants with heels and a really fancy top? We got magazine after magazine showing palazzo pants and I never saw a pair. If you can find some I am totally in agreement here they are a great choice. Fancy top and you are good to go. |
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Nicole in TX
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Post by Nicole in TX on Jan 5, 2016 23:30:08 GMT
I think if you are tall you can get away with pants ... I'm short and I know that it would look horrible I feel your pain. Palazzo pants on a short person = as wide as you are tall.  I would wear the floor length gown, but I would not judge you if you wore the dressy pants.  |
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Post by cindyupnorth on Jan 5, 2016 23:35:09 GMT
Do you have a picture of what you want to wear? If there is anyone wearing tux's, I say go with long gown.
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Post by Woobster on Jan 5, 2016 23:38:13 GMT
I think you'll be just fine in the dressy pants you already have. Enjoy the evening!
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Post by myboysnme on Jan 5, 2016 23:50:13 GMT
Ms Manners just addressed this very question in her Dec 30th column and she said a gown is what is required, but it seems only men comply with the appropriate formal wear while women think pants and a dressy silk jacket is comparable, which it is not.
If others will wear gowns and the attire is formal then gowns are the appropriate dress for the event. But there are always people who think they have reasons not to comply with the requisite attire.
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Deleted
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Jun 2, 2024 5:10:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jan 6, 2016 0:00:09 GMT
You could wear silk pajamas. Doesn't make 'em formal. Wear a long gown or a tux. That is formal wear.
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Post by just PEAchy on Jan 6, 2016 0:08:54 GMT
It sounds like the only people wearing long gowns are the board members/spouses, is that correct? Given the the majority of the other attendees wear cocktail wear, I think the dressy pants/top will be fine. I attend a hospital gala every year and the majority of the ladies wear long formal gowns, but I always see a couple women in dressy pants.
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marimoose
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by marimoose on Jan 6, 2016 2:07:45 GMT
I say dressy pants and a fancy top would be fine. I don't see why it is expected that women have to always wera dresses to fancy events. Not all women like dresses and that is a real old way of thinking. A young woman at my kiddos high school wore a tuxedo style outfit to Prom and it was perfect for her. Wear what you feel comfortable in within the guidelines of formal wear.
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Post by bc2ca on Jan 6, 2016 2:53:27 GMT
It sounds like the only people wearing long gowns are the board members/spouses, is that correct? Given the the majority of the other attendees wear cocktail wear, I think the dressy pants/top will be fine. I attend a hospital gala every year and the majority of the ladies wear long formal gowns, but I always see a couple women in dressy pants. Yes, this is correct. There might be one or two others in a gown, but the majority are in cocktail dresses. |
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Post by bc2ca on Jan 6, 2016 3:04:41 GMT
Ms Manners just addressed this very question in her Dec 30th column and she said a gown is what is required, but it seems only men comply with the appropriate formal wear while women think pants and a dressy silk jacket is comparable, which it is not. If others will wear gowns and the attire is formal then gowns are the appropriate dress for the event. But there are always people who think they have reasons not to comply with the requisite attire. Well, according to Emily Post "dressy separates" are on the acceptable list for Black Tie Optional (along with formal gowns, cocktail dresses or LBD). |
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Post by mari on Jan 6, 2016 3:12:56 GMT
I would personally feel uncomfortable wearing pants to a formal event. I would opt for a dress.
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Deleted
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Jun 2, 2024 5:10:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jan 6, 2016 3:27:31 GMT
Well if men can wear pants to this, then you can to.
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Post by mcscrapper on Jan 6, 2016 3:33:32 GMT
I thought about this a few times before replying. I would not think anything less of you nor judge you if you wore a really nice formal outfit with a pair of pants.
However, if you were on the board or the chairwoman of the event, I would suggest wearing the dress.
Could you find a long skirt to wear instead? The opaque hose thing is in right now so would that be an option?
have fun!
meredith
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Post by darkangel090260 on Jan 6, 2016 4:03:11 GMT
pull on a pair of nylon's and wear the dress. Formal for women is dress not pants.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jan 6, 2016 11:18:11 GMT
I already have a pant/top outfit that I could wear (from a NYE party)? I think you'll be just fine wearing this. Wear something you feel confident in! And have a great time! |
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grinningcat
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Post by grinningcat on Jan 6, 2016 12:19:10 GMT
Wear the dressy pants and tops. I'm actually really surprised at what I am interpreting as sexist comments that a woman has to wear a gown for a formal event. Oh hellz no. It's 2016, surely we have evolved from women can only wear dresses bullshit.
My sister wore a lovely and very formal pant set to my formal wedding. She looked wonderful and completely in place. The outfit would look out of place at any event that was less formal, so really. Wear the damn pants and be comfortable. Don't fall for that "women must wear a dress to be appropriately attired" bullshit.
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purplebee
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Post by purplebee on Jan 6, 2016 12:25:07 GMT
^^^^ Agreed, wear the pants if you don't want to wear a dress.
I'm sure the outfit you already have is very appropriate.
No need to spend more on something else.
Is every guy going to wear a tux? Nope.... Dressy pants and top will be fine.
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Post by quinlove on Jan 6, 2016 12:26:39 GMT
Wear the dressy pants and tops. I'm actually really surprised at what I am interpreting as sexist comments that a woman has to wear a gown for a formal event. Oh hellz no. It's 2016, surely we have evolved from women can only wear dresses bullshit. My sister wore a lovely and very formal pant set to my formal wedding. She looked wonderful and completely in place. The outfit would look out of place at any event that was less formal, so really. Wear the damn pants and be comfortable. Don't fall for that "women must wear a dress to be appropriately attired" bullshit. My feelings exactly. It is 2016 and you can and should wear exactly whatever you think is appropriate ! Enjoy the evening. |
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Post by moveablefeast on Jan 6, 2016 13:56:17 GMT
Ms Manners just addressed this very question in her Dec 30th column and she said a gown is what is required, but it seems only men comply with the appropriate formal wear while women think pants and a dressy silk jacket is comparable, which it is not. If others will wear gowns and the attire is formal then gowns are the appropriate dress for the event. But there are always people who think they have reasons not to comply with the requisite attire. I would say that a person with a psoriasis flare who thinks that is a reason to make a substitution in her planned attire is probably right, and that making a substitution in this case is quite warranted. In this case, the OP is not the guest of honor and therefore will not be in the spotlight, and from what I can tell plans to dress in keeping with the spirit of the event, and as such if the planned outfit is not in keeping with the Miss Manners law, well, that's fine. No one will be harmed and the event will not be ruined. |
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