I need a vent thread.

( (( hugs ) ) )

Awww that would suck if my mom/sister did that to me..

I already posted my vent today... so I am good.. lol.. office crap...

Hugs to you, OP. I can imagine how hurtful that must be.

I feel like my vent is repetitive, but it is truly the most aggravating thing in my life right now. We closed on our old house yesterday, and DH is still in no hurry to look for another. Yesterday afternoon would've been a great time to do so, the best time of the next 2 weeks. But he made other plans. At this rate, I'll be surprised if we're in a new place by the holidays. And I still hate living in this apartment (rent-free, garage apartment on my inlaws property) for so many reasons. Financially, there is nothing holding us back from buying again. It's just simply a matter of going and looking and finding.

perumbula- that would upset me and hurt my feelings too. I'm sorry.

My vent...DH and I are at odds over a major life decision involving work. It's a decision that would have me taking on a multi-faceted job I have no interest in. He would be away from home multiple times per week, with a lot of driving, responsibility, and stress. Everything we have would be put in jeopardy, if it didn't work out. We'd be in tremendous debt if it didn't work out. Plus- then we'd have no jobs or income coming in. The only positive, is that DH could quit a job he has come to hate. Actually- that's not true. I think he'd like the job again if his boss moved on. Which is not out of the realm of possibility.

A week ago, this wasn't on our radar. It's nothing we ever discussed or wanted. But suddenly when the opportunity arose- DH was ready to jump in with both feet. I usually stay out of career decisions- but this involves me 50/50. Involves the whole family. Suddenly I'm hearing things like 'legacy' and 'something to leave the kids' and 'something to call my own'. I want to scream. I have been over and over my concerns- which are HUGE. I finally got blunt about my opposition. It's like he doesn't hear me. Like he can plan around me and pull me in when I 'see the light'. It's become a huge issue in a very short time. It puts me in a very bad position and I don't like it.

I'm trying to think of it as a storm we have to weather.

We've been married almost 27 years. We've weathered storms before. But this is a big one, and it's been awhile.

GO.  Look and bring back flyers, listings, pictures on your phone. Show him you are motivated and he will get on board. I had to do something similar with SO. Now we're doing the house remodel I was waiting for.

Mean girls, much? That is just so incredibly rude. And then to not even have the decency to shut their trap about it. I find FB just highlights the juvenile behaviour that some grown adults engage in. It's like high school all over again with 40 somethings posting their exclusionary behaviour, rubbing it in people's faces and going on ad nauseum about their besties and bffs. I mean, is this really what being 40 is? Going somewhere and purposely leaving someone out and making sure they know it? At least have the decency to *try* and hide it from them.  I'm so sorry. I don't doubt that this hurts you deeply.

This recently happened to my son (only he doesn't know, I never told him.) Our "friends" told him to his face that a friend who moved away was coming to town and that they would invite him over because friend wants to see him. They could have easily said nothing, but no, they made a point of telling him exactly when the kid was coming into town and exactly when my kid should plan to go to their place. Not only did they never invite him that week, the adults posted photos of the kid they *did* invite *everywhere* in his place and "weeee what a great time!"  I don't expect everyone to be included in everything, but don't tell my kid to his face when it's happening then leave him wondering why the invite never came. Needless to say, I've carved those MoFos out of my life. I know you can't do the same, it's family, but you can say, "WTF?" I know I did! I actually said more than WTF. Then I blocked their asses.

"I'm trying to think of it as a storm we have to weather.

We've been married almost 27 years. We've weathered storms before. But this is a big one, and it's been awhile."

Sues, sounds like a difficult decision you are facing. Would the gamble be worth it if it works out? Hope you can come to an agreement that will be the best for you and your family, whichever way it is resolved.

Op, sorry for your family's mistreatment, that would be hard.

Guess my vent is that I will be going back to work (school) next month, and I have one coworker who is a complete PITA, and who has the support of the boss. Boss knows she is a pain, but wants no drama/confrontation over anything b/c she has lots in her personal life. Sigh..... Will have to work hard to keep my head down and my mouth closed. But I sure don't want to.

I know that must hurt. ((((HUGS))))

((Hugs)) That stinks!

My vent for today is that DH's family is having a reunion next weekend. It's 5 hours away. We have been planning on attending, and the ILs know this. Last night, DH says, "I don't think there's room for us at the house." WTF? His sister's family of 6 uses 3 bedrooms, while my family of 4 is stuck in one. Plus, MIL is (most likely) giving our bedroom to the guest that they have staying there the entire week! DH says we should stay at my parents cottage (which is 1-1/2 hours away and currently has no water) or sleep in a tent (I have a bad back, and we won't fit 4 people and 2 dogs in a tent comfortably.) Neither option will work, so once again, I'm going to look like the bad guy for saying that we have to stay home.

Sues--I so understand what you mean.  My dh has done the same.  A big decision (boat, vacation land) comes along, he starts asking me my opinion, I give valid reasons why not, he says "oh", and then he does it anyway.  Both times involve him borrowing money from the family savings intending for him to pay it back with his "hobby" money and then it never happening.

The boat works out ok as his fishing boat but not as a family fun boat as he told me.  The land is just stupid; we haven't used it hardly at all.

I admit I get jealous of couples that appear to be on the same page on things; I've heard that people actually have discussions together about the decisions!!

I am sorry because mean people suck and that is just plain mean!

My vents are going to sound horrible but it is how I feel right now.

First off I am so disappointed that my mom and her SO (they have been together for 18 years) moved so far away. He is a loner and doesn't like people around I guess. He is a nice guy but I lost all those years I could have had with my mom. It makes me even sadder then I already was.
[HASH]2 is my SIL and maybe this sounds petty but I am sorry. The entire week I spent at the hospital with my mom he made no contact nothing. When she passed away still nothing. I little text or something would have been nice. So I thought maybe he didn't want to say anything on the phone. We work together, I came into work yesterday and again not a word, just a question about work. The 100+ people that responded on facebook, most of them strangers but still nothing from him. That hurt.

This sucks!  The same thing happens to me. I try not to let it bother me, but it does.

Sorry!
Lisa D.

OP, that just sucks.  I know because my mom and sister often do things together while I am at work.  They both have a limited work schedule.  


DH's exwife is the laziest person I know.  She doesn't work so she allows his kids to stay up all night.  We, on the other hand, have to work.  But these kids come during the week and won't go to bed.  It's driving me crazy.