caro
Drama Llama
Refupea 1130
Posts: 5,222 
|
Post by caro on Jul 30, 2014 15:29:13 GMT
In regards to my water park thread.
I am sorry for any hurt feelings I caused by my bikini statement and heavy women/girls.
Me, of all people, who was shunned, whispered about, stared at, because I had a severely mentally challenged daughter and anywhere we went, for 14 years, I felt it. It was awful.
That thread brought those memories back full force and it didn't feel good at all.
So I offer my sincere apology. I am really a nice person
|
|
|
|
Post by lucyg on Jul 30, 2014 15:33:17 GMT
I didn't read that thread beyond the OP, so I don't know if it got really crazy or not. I guess so?
I know you are a nice person. I also know that I don't belong in a bikini and there are others who don't, either.
However the thread went, try not to feel too bad about it. Sometimes the peas like to slash and burn.
|
|
|
|
Post by alibama on Jul 30, 2014 15:41:06 GMT
Caro,
I didn't take your post that way at all. I think you kind of got dumped on which is a popular thing to happen around the peas.
Don't feel bad!
|
|
sharlag
Drama Llama
I like my artsy with a little bit of fartsy.
Posts: 6,574
Location: Kansas
Jun 26, 2014 12:57:48 GMT
|
Post by sharlag on Jul 30, 2014 15:42:40 GMT
Of course you're a nice person!  |
|
River
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,516
Location: Alabama
Jun 26, 2014 15:26:04 GMT
|
Post by River on Jul 30, 2014 15:45:55 GMT
I think you are a nice person too! ((hugs)) Just so you know, I have those thoughts also. I try to look at it as confidence, but man, sometimes that's tough.  |
|
ginacivey
Pearl Clutcher
refupea #2 in southeast missouri
Posts: 4,685
|
Post by ginacivey on Jul 30, 2014 15:48:09 GMT
oh hell
you sure got a pile on
i don't think it need six pages but you know how those things go...the whole group mentality
no one thinks you are a bad person -
i've had my share of like-threads - just brush it off and keep on truckin
gina
|
|
smartypants71
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,714
Location: Houston, TX
|
Post by smartypants71 on Jul 30, 2014 15:48:31 GMT
Of course you're a nice person. I wouldn't even worry about it. |
|
|
|
Post by Outspoken on Jul 30, 2014 15:55:16 GMT
I could have written your OP. I'm a huge people watcher. I even have an album on Facebook dedicated to "what were they thinking" wardrobes! We all do it in one sense or another. Don't sweat it!
|
|
|
|
Post by scrapmaven on Jul 30, 2014 16:00:49 GMT
Hey, I did a post on the former board about a situation that really hurt some people. I was in a situation where I was very nervous and posted w/o considering how it would come across. At the time, I thought I was being funny and releasing stress, but didn't realize that I was being hurtful, instead. Know what? It's past history. You apologized which is very cool. You are a nice person and this is a blip on your radar. Let it go and give yourself permission to continue posting here. You made amends and now it's time to give yourself permission to do a V-8 slap and move on.
|
|
|
|
Post by sues on Jul 30, 2014 16:01:43 GMT
I even have an album on Facebook dedicated to "what were they thinking" wardrobes!
 Holy shit. Nice. OP- of course you are a nice person. And this was a nice thing to do.
|
|
|
|
Post by gypsymama on Jul 30, 2014 16:07:34 GMT
not everything looks good on every person, that's just reality no matter what some peas try to pretend!
|
|
craftykitten
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,304
Jun 26, 2014 7:39:32 GMT
|
Post by craftykitten on Jul 30, 2014 16:09:36 GMT
Of course you are a nice person, OP. Don't beat yourself up about it. Your apology is very gracious.
|
|
conchita
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,141
Jul 1, 2014 11:25:58 GMT
|
Post by conchita on Jul 30, 2014 16:12:37 GMT
I stayed out of the discussion. It was very thought provoking in the way we all have experienced and contributed to body shaming. Personally I don't think you intended to shame anyone. And I think that's why so many were vocal in making sure you and anyone else reading becomes aware. I know I learned a few things reading everyone's responses. Your apology here shows you realize the impact your words actually had and I appreciate you trying to make it right with everyone who was offended.
|
|
|
|
Post by shevy on Jul 30, 2014 16:12:45 GMT
I think everyone has some thoughts about others in public. We'd be lying if we didn't admit to it. I don't think that you're a mean person. I just think that sometimes we think or say things and don't realize how it sounds on the other side of it.
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 2, 2024 11:36:45 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 30, 2014 16:13:43 GMT
Very nice op. Glad to hear it.
Too bad some still don't get it. Sigh. What "looks good" on someone is completely objective and not the same for everyone. Stop the judging and worry about yourself.
|
|
|
|
Post by sues on Jul 30, 2014 16:13:52 GMT
not everything looks good on every person, that's just reality no matter what some peas try to pretend! I read the whole thread- and while I didn't agree with everything said, I didn't get the impression anyone was saying this. Not even close. It was more 'why do you think you can tell anyone else what looks good/appropriate/flattering'. |
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 2, 2024 11:36:45 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 30, 2014 16:17:51 GMT
I think most of get caught looking at someone and wonder, what were they thinking! I am also a people watcher, and I'm over weight myself. But I'll still look at women and what they're wearing, good or bad. Heck I even notice family or friends and their occasional wardrobe misjudgement.  as I'm sure they do mine. |
|
|
|
Post by lovetodigi on Jul 30, 2014 16:19:43 GMT
You should not feel bad. Sometimes things get said that are not meat to hurt feelings, but it happens and really, there is no way to totally avoid it. There is always someone, somewhere that is offended by something. All you can do is apolize and go on. You have done that, now you should just forget it and not let it bother you. I read the first few posts on that thread was not offended by your post.
|
|
|
|
Post by workingclassdog on Jul 30, 2014 16:20:28 GMT
No worries from me.. I will admit being somewhat judgy when I see something like a too small bikini.. in fact my cousin posted pictures of her in her bikini and I immediately thought, WHOA girl, I wouldn't be posting that. BUT who am I to judge?? I shouldn't have. I didn't say anything of course. And kudos for her for not caring. And I will be the first to admit I wouldn't dream of putting on a bikini much less a regular swimsuit unless I have too. That is me though. I don't have that self confident and I wish I did! We are ALL not perfect people even the peas.. |
|
J u l e e
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,531
Location: Cincinnati
Jun 28, 2014 2:50:47 GMT
|
Post by J u l e e on Jul 30, 2014 16:24:29 GMT
I'm sorry you've felt judgmental stares, and probably actual judgment, from others. Truly. I hate that for anyone. And I'll stand with you if you need someone when crap gets said about children with disabilities and challenges. (((HUGS))) You are a great person.
ETA - and Lord knows I have said stuff I've regretted. Tons of times. I've trampled on others' hot button issues before I even knew they were issues. We've all done it.
|
|
|
|
Post by doxielady on Jul 30, 2014 16:28:07 GMT
Very nice apology. Very classy.
I read most of the thread and there were a lot of good, thought provoking things said. Things I wouldn't have thought about. How to see things from other's perspectives. In that respect - I appreciate that you started the thread. I learned some things.
I'm sorry you got piled on, though. That part wasn't needed.
|
|
loco coco
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,662
|
Post by loco coco on Jul 30, 2014 16:28:13 GMT
i didnt think your post was that bad, we all people watch. and Im sure people watched me in my bikini in vegas next to all those models! i was drunk and didnt care, it was fabulous
|
|
|
|
Post by wezee on Jul 30, 2014 16:33:06 GMT
That was sweet of you to apologize. I don't think you are a bad person. ((hugs)) God knows how many times I've said something I regret!
|
|
|
|
Post by ljs1691 on Jul 30, 2014 16:41:31 GMT
Here is where I stand. I think you have every right to say what you did. I am a big old girl and I have enough self confidence and self awareness to realize my body does not belong in a bikini. I didn't think your original post was malicious at all, I think it was an innocent observation. I think the attacks were unneccessary and a conversation could have been had without bashing you. That is why so many of us were lurkers before.
|
|
|
|
Post by tanyab on Jul 30, 2014 16:54:18 GMT
You should not feel bad at all. There's a very select group of women who look great in a bikini. The way some people wear them with things sticking out that no one but themselves should ever see causes anyone to say wtf? It's no different than a tight dress or tube top or pair of short shorts. Some people look great in them but the majority are better off not. It's just a fact of life!
|
|
|
|
Post by monicad on Jul 30, 2014 16:56:04 GMT
I think everyone has some thoughts about others in public. We'd be lying if we didn't admit to it. I don't think that you're a mean person. I just think that sometimes we think or say things and don't realize how it sounds on the other side of it.  We've all done it...don't worry about it.  |
|
The Great Carpezio
Pearl Clutcher
Something profound goes here.
Posts: 2,936
|
Post by The Great Carpezio on Jul 30, 2014 17:03:39 GMT
Eh, we've all done it.  . |
|
|
|
Post by sacteach on Jul 30, 2014 17:05:48 GMT
I think it's great that you came back to apologize. I did comment on the other thread and appreciate that you realize that some people are/were hurt by your comments.
My opinions have definitely changed over the years in regards to how I look at others. I'm not going to lie and say I've never judged anyone before nor am I saying that everyone looks good in everything as someone else stated. But, I've learned to keep those comments to myself much more as I really only need to be concerned about what I wear and how I feel wearing it. I'm sure I slip up from time to time and make comments that I'm not proud of, but I'm growing and learning and hopefully that thread opened the conversation for a few more people.
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 2, 2024 11:36:45 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 30, 2014 17:07:05 GMT
I think it's great that you came back to apologize. I did comment on the other thread and appreciate that you realize that some people are/were hurt by your comments. My opinions have definitely changed over the years in regards to how I look at others. I'm not going to lie and say I've never judged anyone before nor am I saying that everyone looks good in everything as someone else stated. But, I've learned to keep those comments to myself much more as I really only need to be concerned about what I wear and how I feel wearing it. I'm sure I slip up from time to time and make comments that I'm not proud of, but I'm growing and learning and hopefully that thread opened the conversation for a few more people. |
|
|
|
Post by cindyupnorth on Jul 30, 2014 17:08:01 GMT
I agree, Eh, Just another day at the old NSBR. great apolgy though! We all post some stuff we regret. Nice when we don't get ALL jumped on about it, but yea, it happens. The smell of blood ya know. ha
|
|
Holy shit. Nice.
as I'm sure they do mine. 
. 
